Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight. I do not.



EPOV

"Dad, are you sure?" Bella asked. She was chewing on her bottom lip nervously. Alice had asked her to go on a shopping trip to New York Thursday to Friday while the sun was shinning in Forks. Which meant that Bella would miss spending Thursday evening with her father.

He nodded, "Yup, I'm just going to watch the game tomorrow night anyway. You go have your fun. Your old man can take care of himself for one night."

In his mind I could see that while he would miss spending that time with his daughter, he didn't want to bore her or smother her. He thought that if he made sure her time here was enjoyable, she would stay. His quiet devotion humbled me.

"Isn't Sandy working today?" She asked, a knowing smirk forming on her lips as she watched him brighten considerable.

"Yes, she is." He blushed and I saw her in his mind. She was a pretty sort of woman who looked to be in her 50s with slightly greying hair, soft features and a kind smile. A thought occurred to him, she is bringing her grandchildren to work with her. She wanted them to meet him and hopefully Bella as well. He opens his mouth to ask her to drop by Sandy's house with him tomorrow but then changes his mind.

The last time they spoke of Sandy's family, she had asked him if he was ever disappointed that he would never have grandchildren of his own. The memory of her face as she asked breaks my heart, almost as much as his real answer. Of course when he replied, he didn't tell the truth.

I know as well as Charlie does that she would have made a wonderful mother…

After Charlie is done eating breakfast and on his way to work, she grabs her bag and we leave for school.

When we pull up to beside Rose's BMW we see Jasper and Alice waiting for us, Alice bouncing around excitedly. From the corner of my eye I see Bella grimace, reminding me of the reason why Alice is so jovial.

"Shopping is clearly not your favourite pastime. Why do it?"

Bella sends a rueful but affectionate smile at Alice who is gesturing wildly as she talks to Jasper about her plans for their trip, "Because…it makes her happy."

"Are you always such a people pleaser?" I asked teasingly.

Her head snapped towards me, her expression was tortured and she whispered out a strangled, "Yes."

She refused to look at me for the rest of the day.

VPOV

Asshole. Who the fuck does he think he is?

I should go back in there and demand an apology. It's far less than I deserve, I give him everything. He's my one and only and he just dismisses me like I'm nobody.

I'm going in.

"FUCKKK...nngh...ah, Bella...oh yeah..."

What the fuck?

NO FUCKING WAY. Not if I have anything to say about it. That dirty slut better keep her nasty paws off.

APOV

Oh my God.

Victoria's coming.

~*~*~*~

No. No.

A greasy haired boy sitting at the desk next to mine shoots me a nervous glance, reminding me to rein it in.

But he doesn't understand.

It's too soon!

She'll be here by next week and my idiot brother hasn't even started the whole early 19th century court-bull-ship I know he plans to follow through with. This isn't going to work.

They need a push.

By the time the school day is over, I have a plan. It's going to get real messy but productivity of any kind is better than idleness…I'm sure some dead famous person said that once.

I'm there on the porch to meet Edward when he pulls up after dropping Bella off at home.

You're coming with us to New York.

"Alice, I am not coming shopping with you. Bella is really looking forward to spending this time with you, even if it is in stores."

Of course she is. She's my sister.

He arches an eyebrow at me as if this isn't obvious.

Edward, it's time for you to start making some bold moves. I'm not talking declarations of love or anything; she's not ready for that, but…kiss the girl Edward, stop skimming along the surface and start prying! You need to know all of Bella so you can love all of her!

What I resist thinking about is how terribly he'll react initially. I haven't had a vision to see it because Bella hasn't decided to tell him yet, but I don't need one. Regardless, it's time to pull of the band-aid and feel something raw.

He's still frowning, "Alice, she didn't seem very happy with me today."

Uh oh. I missed something. What happened?

"I don't know. I was just teasing her and she has hardly acknowledged me all day."

Hm…what was said?

"I just asked if she was always a people pleaser and she froze up."

Unbidden, memories of visions past enter my mind, expressions of ecstasy on the faces of countless anonymous men. Edward stiffens and there is no point in pretending.

She is not a succubus dear brother.

As predicted, he still explodes, "Then what the hell was that?!"

You don't know anything and I won't tell. Like I said, it's time to really talk to Bella. So. You are coming with us, and so is Jasper, and that's that.

I could see him thinking about it, and as his decisions changed, different scenarios of possible futures played out, but he perked up with one.

Edward and Bella were sitting on a bed, cross-legged facing one another. Only an inch of space between them, a space filled with delicious tension.

Edward spoke quietly, "You know Bella, if you didn't hate what you are, you would love what you could be."

Bella smiled softly in return, "Thank you Edward. You're the only one who makes me feel like what I am could be a gift."

"You are. …This is unbearable."

Bella giggled, "You're breaking my concentration."

"Are you concentrating on suppressing it? If you are, I must tell you, you are failing miserably."

Bella laughed and slapped Edward's arm playfully before they both froze.

"I could hear you." They said in unison.

Edward and I starred at each other in shock. But after thinking about it for a minute, it made sense. Jasper understood my moods more clearly than he understood anyone else's, and our moods affected each other more intensely. I could see him without any effort at all and there were times when I seemed as easily predictable to him as he was to me. It made surprises nearly impossible, but the connection was apparent even in how it manifested itself within our gifts.

As mates, Edward and Bella could easily be the same, even more so considering part of Bella's gift consists of altering the affects of powers.

I stopped this path of thought immediately when I saw Edward fighting a smile. Even the thought of Bella as his mate made him as giddy as a schoolgirl.

Haha, Casanova's scowling now.

Now we just had to get Bella to admit she felt the exact same way.

Edward, Bella and I are taking the midnight flight, Jasper and you should board the one two hours after that.

"Why not take the same flight?"

I need to talk to Bella. Besides, Jasper and you can be a surprise for her. I am well aware that she would prefer any kind of distraction available while put through my fashion boot camp. What better distraction than the love of her immortal life?

~*~*~*~

Edward was reluctant at first to even temporarily deceive Bella, but with Jasper's power of persuasion, he was convinced.

Okay, so I know this weekend is going to be crazy heavy on the drama, but I'm still super excited! We're going to go dancing Thursday night…hm, I wonder if I could convince Bella to use that succubus disguise at the club…it would be hilarious. But no, that vision looked pretty serious, I don't think they'll want the reminder…still maybe one year I can replicate the look for Halloween. We could be the Succubus Sisters! Well, perhaps not, Tanya's family usually spends Halloween with us; they may not appreciate the joke.

I showed up at Bella's place just after Charlie fell asleep. She couldn't understand why our flight plan included a connecting flight from Denver, but I needed the time. I brushed it off as a desire to indulge in first class flying and she didn't press the matter.

Almost as soon as we were seated I knew it was time to come clean, especially if she was going to open up to me like I hoped she would.

"Bella."

"Mmhm?" She was distracted looking out the window. I know this was one of the few times she had flown. I hated to make it a painful experience.

Okay Alice, time to tear off that band-aid.

"Bella, I know everything. I know about your…your mom, I know about James, I know about your gift."

She stiffened up immediately, moments passed before she finally turned towards me, a blank expression masking her face, "Don't call it that."

I waited, as I knew I must. How could it feel, to know your secret was never really a secret, to know someone that had been a mere stranger only months before knew the story of your life, very excruciating, humiliating detail, without you having ever told them?

"How?" She choked out finally.

"Bella, do you trust me?"

She responded right away, "I do."

"Then you have to trust me when I tell you that I love you, so much, you're my sister, we're connected, and I don't know why, or how, but visions of you have been coming to me ever since you were young. I've been waiting for you."

Bella gaped at me before her face crumpled, "I love you too Alice. But…how can you even be around me knowing what I am? What I do?"

"You and I both know it was never your choice."

"But it was! I ran away! I left Charlie alone! I listened to Irina! I followed James! There is always a choice!"

"Bella, your choice was to make sure Charlie had a long and happy life. Think about it though, because of the kind of person that you are, it was never really a choice. If you were anything but this wonderful, caring, loving woman, then it would have been a real decision."

She looked away from me and starred at the seat in front of her, breathing hard, "Does…does Edward know?" Her voice raised an octave, "Do you all know? What is this Alice? Are you just humoring the poor little prostitute?"

Aaannnd there's the anger. The other passengers shifted uncomfortably.

"No, Bella! I'm the only one who knows! Well…I think Jasper might be suspicious. But he's as much your brother as I'm your sister. Christ Bella, do you have any idea how unreasonable you are about your feelings of guilt and self-loathing?"

She snorted and shot me an incredulous look.

"Don't give me that look missy. I do know! And I know as well as you do that you have nothing to be ashamed of. It's all James…I'd love to kill that sick son of a-"

Bella's eyes widened and I quieted down.

"Bella, you need to tell Edward."

She hung her head, "I know."

"Why haven't you?"

I knew why.

"I can't bear for him to look at me like…"

"Like Demetri did?"

Bella flinched. Another silent moment passed, as Bella again tried to absorb the fact that I literally knew everything. Denver came and went and we talked. When she cried, I cried, when she got angry remembering, I got angry remembering. Her pain was my pain and it felt good to get it out.

I debated when I should tell her about Victoria. I knew if I told her now she would insist on going back to Charlie, so I decided to wait until the return flight. I was concentrating entirely on Victoria and I had arranged for the rest of my family to rotate shifts watching over Charlie while we were gone. He would be fine.

What Victoria doesn't know is that Bella isn't alone anymore.

EPOV

"Alice, why are we getting separate rooms? It's not like we're worried about having to share a bed at night." The receptionist threw them a puzzled look over her computer. The girls in front of her just unknowingly shattered her stereotype of lesbians.

Alice giggled and gestured at us over Bella's shoulder. The look of pleasure and relief when she turned and saw us standing there dissolved whatever uncertainty I felt about surprising her like this. But just as quickly her brows furrowed and she held up her hand as if to say 'wait'.

"Alice. Who is in what room?"

Alice gave Bella her signature pout, "Bella, you wouldn't refuse me a romantic night in New York with my husband, would you?"

Bella wouldn't, but she would inquire as to if there were any other vacant rooms. There weren't.

With false cheer remedied by Jasper's reassurance that she was just nervous about imposing upon my privacy, I grabbed her bag and steered her towards the elevator. I resisted the temptation to put my hand on her lower back. She was jumpy enough as it was.

By this time it was 9am, so after quickly dropping off the luggage, Alice came to collect Bella for their day of shopping. Jasper and I opted to go along and carry their bags for them. I never understood why Jasper seemed to almost enjoy shopping with Alice when she was shopping for herself. I realized why as Alice had Bella parade the possibilities for us. My sister, as eccentric and confident as she is, had Bella in all manner of garments. Bella drew the line at modeling lingerie, and thank God because I don't think I could have handled it.

Surprisingly Alice freed Bella shortly after 2pm in the afternoon, long before any of the stores were even closed. Nonetheless they had made a nice little dent in Bella's rather substantial savings.

Edward, take a walk in Central Park with Bella. It's time for that talk.

Bella accepted the suggestion when I offered, but she still shot a suspicious look at Alice, who grinned back angelically.

We walked around for a while and talked about nonsense, music, Emmett's poor acting skills, Charlie and Sandy. We were both nervous; I could tell that Alice had talked to her too. Eventually I decided we needed privacy and we rented a rowboat from Loeb Boathouse. The day was smoggy and overcast, but the Park was as enchanting as ever and strangely less crowded than it usually is.

For a long time I just rowed and Bella sat in front of my, fidgeting as if she were human.

Trying to calm the tense atmosphere I started to sing softly, my voice found the lyrics without a conscious thought in my head. And that was how, on a foggy day in April, I found myself sitting in an overpriced rowboat in Central Park with the most wonderful girl of my acquaintance, singing a ridiculously theatrical version of "If I Can't Have You", feeling happier than I had in a long time.

And I had to do it.

It would have been inexcusable not to do it.

I kissed her.

I dropped the oars and practically lunged at her, dropping to my knees in front of her on the bottom of the rowboat, drenching the fabric over my knees, holding her face between my palms and kissing her with everything that I had because I wanted her to have it.

My eyes clenched tightly shut; I didn't have to look to see that she hadn't moved. Her hands were probably still curled around the bench beneath her on either side of her thighs, her knees were pressed into my abdomen. But I could feel her lips tentatively responding as if she had never been kissed before. Slow, hesitant, innocently sensual. Perfect. I kissed her upper lip, then her lower lip, and they parted softly and her sweet breath washed over my face. Dazed, I pulled away to see her smiling a blinding smile.

"I was hoping you would do that." She says.

BPOV

Tender, adoring, safe, but absolutely thrilling – that was my first real kiss.

I suppressed my gift, hoping for that kiss, and still the chemistry was there, warm but not overwhelming.

When he looks at me like that, when I can feel his touch with just him behind it, I can forget what I am and start to remember what it felt like to be human, natural and carefree. I will always be grateful to him for this one moment.

But it's time for my feet to touch the ground again.

"Edward? Can we go back to the hotel? There are some things I need you to know…"

"Sure."

We silently rowed back, Edward no doubt apprehensive from my abrupt mood change. I can't even will myself to smile at the thought that he must be rubbing off on me. He's usually the one with the mood swings. A smile does break through though when I remember Jasper telling me that I can get Edward out of a dark mood faster than he can. I can see Edward looking at me with a puzzled expression, but I don't explain myself.

He opens the door to our suite and follows me in. The moment the door clicks shut I round on him. Let's make this quick and excruciating.

"Edward, do you remember feeling…funny when you touched me?"

He nods.

"I swear, I just want to talk, but I need you to understand something about me. If you want me to stop, tell me. I promise this won't hurt you physically."

And there's that apprehensive look again. I advance slowly and when I'm a foot from him I reach up and place an open palm over his chest. It jolts me as badly as it hits him, a shudder passes through him and he let's out a groan. I forget again. I forget as I watch his face and I'm captivated by how beautiful he looks like this, relaxed and tense all at once. Waves of sheer pleasure pass through my system and seeing him like this just adds fuel to the fire. A throaty moan escapes and he opens his eyes. Seconds tick by and we just feel this pulsing, tingling heat, jolting our sex, while we stare at one another. Without warning he grabs me by my arms and pulls me to him. This kiss is nothing like the first.

It's demanding and passionate, dark chocolate to the park's vanilla sweet kiss. I'm burning up, on the brink of something beautiful, relief and ecstasy all at once. His tongue ravishes my mouth and I respond just as eagerly, clawing and pulling, closer, closer, closer, still too far away. The hot, slick slide of his tongue against mine makes this moment more sexual than any act I have ever performed, our mouths performing the way our bodies want to, cool lips molding in wondrous ways I didn't know they could. His strong, hard body feels beautiful against mine, accommodating in the most intimate ways.

Just as quickly as it starts, I'm pushed away.

It takes us both a few minutes to calm down, to catch the breath neither of us needs, but that eludes us nonetheless. I don't want to breathe though, I could go centuries without the tiniest of inhales if it meant he would kiss me like that.

His eyes look wild when he finally speaks, "What the hell was that?"

That was us.

"That was my power."

"All those men…" He shouts furiously, trailing off and reaching his hands up to bury them in his lush hair, an act of frustration so painfully familiar now.

"What?" I asked, confused.

"If you're not a succubus, then what are you?"

What. Not who. I am not an individual. I am my power. All the years that I have been in a coven, not once has one of them called me by name. Kate at least has the decency to call me 'Phoenix' for my hometown. Everyone else's nicknames for me range from 'cumshot' to what Edward keeps calling me. Succubus, a fancy way of calling someone a mythical whore.

"Edward, you have to stop projecting what you think I am onto me." Briefly I transform into my idea of a Succubus, red eyes, dark hair, curves and fangs. I can tell from his frown that he doesn't think the image fits. I change back into myself. The relief he feels again shows on his face.

"It isn't fair. It isn't fair that you get to project everything you want on to me, making me something that I'm not when I can't even do it to myself. I can't pretend that I am anything other than what I am. The only good thing that I am is a daughter. That is why I cling to it. And it's not fucking fair for you to fall for that, make me think your mine when you don't even know me well enough for me to be yours!"

He looks shocked and I don't blame him. I don't know where this is coming from. All I know is that I'm angry. And while I should be angry with me, because I am everything I shouldn't be, I couldn't help but be angry with him because he refuses to see it.

It isn't fair for him to fall for me, neglect what I am and make it so much more apparent to me.

How many times? How many times have I told him not to trust his feelings? That he is only seeing one side of who I am?

He never hears. It is time to make him listen.

"I've been the innocent girl for too long, trying to be what you think I am. I have to stop. I'm not a succubus. Let me tell you…what…I am."

I take a deep breath, "I am Dominik."

He starred at me, confused. I transformed into an olive skinned dominatrix.

"I am Sophie."

His face relaxed into a grim but resigned expression while I introduced him to James's concept of the girl next door.

"I am Carmen."

James's feisty latina.

"I am Amelia."

James's tribute to the media's idea of vampire royalty.

"I am Dalisay."

James's anime girl. Wide-eyed and soft Asian features.

"Helene." I choked out.

James's ice queen. Edward's mask was faltering, revealing an ancient despair. I think he was beginning to understand and I hated him a little bit for that.

"Lucia."

James's curvaceous African-American.

"Reilly."

James's tomboy.

"Namid."

James's Native American.

Edward held his hands up in supplication, "Stop." He begged.

Calista. My mind whispered. But instead I transform back into my own skin.

"Bella, who are these girls?"

"These girls are the dancers at Las Vegas's Polished Ram."

He took a fortifying breath, "What kind of…establishment is the Polished Ram?"

"A strip club."

Another deep breathe, "Bella. Are any of those girls real?"

"No."

His eyelids clenched tightly shut.

I waited and kept my hands to myself. Internally I begged, open your eyes, please, let me see you.

Finally he did just that, "Tell me everything."

He walked over to the bed and sat down, patting the space next to him. I sat down and was shocked when he reached his hand up to fiddle with a strand of my hair. But the subtle electricity I always felt when he was close calmed me down, so I did exactly as he asked. I told him everything.

He was sincerely sympathetic when I told him about my mother. How I knew it was coming but I was so young, I didn't know what to do, how my father's grief suffocated me and how I let him down in the worst kind of ways.

He was frustrated when I told him about my struggle finding any employer willing to take me on. How grateful I was to Irina when she took me under her wing. I told him about what was basically an auction on my virginity. My first time was a fumbling, uncomfortable affair in a seedy motel with an overweight middle-aged man who didn't even bother to remove his wedding ring. The next time wasn't much better so I jumped ship and turned to stripping. I was shocked when Edward revealed that he had never been with a woman. Considering what Jasper once told me about Rose, it clearly was not for lack of attractive prospects.

He was angry when I told him about James exiting from the shadows at the end of my shift. How I had thought him to be the most beautiful creature I had ever seen, the way he dazzled and charmed and reassured and before I knew it, it was just us in a vacant parking lot. The sting of his bite a moment before Victoria pulled up. The way he threatened me with Charlie when I made the mistake of running away.

He was relieved when I told him how my curse of a gift also allowed me to keep some distance. It wasn't hard for me to get a man off easily. There were never any complaints and quite frankly, no man wants to advertise that he couldn't make it to the main event, especially when he got exactly what he paid for – a release. Edward was shocked when I told him that I had only been with four men throughout all of this, more still when I told him he was the only one who made me feel my power simultaneously.

The third man had been a Volturi guard. He was insistent that I allow him physical peace until he was inside of me. James knew I could control my gift if I concentrated, because I did it every time I was summoned to his office, so he agreed on my behalf.

The fourth was…painful to talk about.

EPOV

"I almost fell in love once, you know. He was not much older than I am and he was perfect. Sweet, a bit shy, his name was Demetri. I was scared and thrilled all at one, I felt like I was ready to fall. And I was terrified because I couldn't do that, not to Charlie. Love would complicate my entire deal with James," She hesitated and let out a tired sigh, "Anyways, he talked to me. He knew me better than anyone, he knew everything and he didn't look at me like I was dirt."

Her eyes were squeezed tight, by now we were laying back on the bed, I rolled to my side and looked down at her, waiting to hear what she didn't want to tell me, "One night James came to me and told me that I'd been booked after my shift at the club. I was so happy when I found Demetri waiting for me outside of my change room. I first met him in a music store and saw him there a couple of times, he eventually asked me to go for a walk with him. I opened up like I never had before and to see him waiting there for me…I thought he was saving me from one more night, one more night of hating myself, I thought we'd go for another one of our walks, or maybe he'd take me on an actual date. Maybe we'd go dancing." A wistful smile crossed her face, "I was living in a fairytale. We walked a couple blocks until we reached his place."

"He asked me if I wanted to come in and I felt elated, like he was welcoming me into his life. Instead we bypassed every room until we got to his bedroom. I knew then, he wanted me, but not as much as I wanted him, so I shut down and did my job like I was expected to. I got one night with him and a part of me died. He joined our coven for a while and acted like nothing had happened. I guess he got me out of his system, another satisfied customer." Her voice held the faint echo of bitterness, "A couple of months ago he found his mate. Her name is Heidi and she's one of the most beautiful women I have ever laid eyes on, inside and out. They left us shortly after, off to start their life together." A loaded silence filled the air for a moment, until a whisper reached my ears, "I can be anybody that anyone wants." She looked at me then and despite the fact that she couldn't, I almost felt like begging her not to cry, "But only on the outside. I'm made for sex. Not love."

I wanted to argue with her, but I know it's fruitless; instead I rolled onto my stomach and smiled down at her, "Bella?"

"Mmhm?"

"Let's go dancing." A breathtaking smile lights up her face and I'm glad. I've really missed the sun.

~*~*~*~

I wish I could describe what this afternoon felt like. It hurt like hell, to know that I had been living a life of mundane normality with my abnormal family, and all the while, Bella had been brutally exploited and blackmailed. Why couldn't I have found her sooner?

But it was also a relief. I know now that nothing could change how I feel about her. When the surface emotions, simple reactions, were swept aside, my love for her is unshaken. If anything I admire her more for her strength. It adds a new dimension to her relationship with her father. It was a relief to finally be able to really talk to her and know her, to have it all on the table and still just be us, just Edward and Bella.

Still, in the pit of my stomach the knowledge that I would never really be able to believe it, to understand or grasp what it is that Bella does, without seeing it. For both of our sake's, I hope I never do.

My God though, when my family had discussed Bella's shape shifting powers, to learn she could look like anything human and female, they had played a game at guessing at the possibilities. Even Alice, who I suspected knew more than she let on.

If James wanted money, he could have had Bella walk into a bank impersonating an important client, but he didn't, he degraded her and made her a sex slave. I know exactly what kind of man James is. It's not about money, it's about power. He will never let her go without a fight.

She's worth it.

But down in that little pit that sits at the bottom of my stomach a tiny voice within the debris of cowardice, which undermines the feeble, young sprout of 'us', whispers "is she"?


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