Here's chapter 3. And thanks again for all the reviews. This chapter contains parodies as well as the introduction of my character, Pilot the Border collie.
NOTE: here's a list of people who five the characters would be voiced by if this fan fic was a film.
Howard the Doberman (Voiced by Cedric the entertainer)
Dan the Doberman (Voiced by Steve Harvey)
Pilot the Border collie (Voiced by Wanda Sykes)
Relentless the Blood hound (Voiced by Larry the cable guy)
Kip the foxhound (Voiced by Jennifer Hale)
Skip the foxhound (Voiced by Tony Rock)
A few blocks away in the midtown area, there was a stray dog laying in a trash can that had been knocked over. "Oy…I feel like I got hit by a truck" the dog said to herself as she got up. She had been living on the streets for several months, she didn't really mind the lifestyle but she did want another home. She walked over to PC Mackintosh who didn't seem interested in a stay dog walking up to him. "Hey! Beat it you mongrel!" he said to the Border collie, the dog yelped and ran away. Once she was out of his site she stopped to pant, "Could this get any worse?" she asked herself. Just then an American Bulldog was standing right in front of her. He didn't seem too happy having the Border collie on his turf, he began to growl. "Eek! L-look m-maybe we can talk this over a nice latte', what do say?" the collie stuttered. The Bulldog just ignored her, before he could even try to bite her, the Border collie took off running again. She had her tail between her legs and was yelping. She stopped in front of a coffee shop to rest "Nothing's been easy today or ever for that matter" she said to herself. Meanwhile, something else went on several miles away. "Hey Ginge I…Ginger? Are you here?" Rocky asked "Boo!" said a voice from behind him. Rocky screamed, the voice behind him started laughing it was Mac. "I gotcha, I thought you'd never notice me" she said to Rocky, "You scare me sometimes, Mac" said Rocky. Mac laughed, "Aye, but not as much as that!" she answered as she pointed to the ceiling. "What? What are you talking about? There's nothing that could…" before Rocky could finish his sentence he heard two voices shout above him. "Dog pile!" they shouted and landed on Rocky, "AAH!" Rocky yelled as he looked up. "Ohh, you guys…ok I get the point, very funny now could you do me a favor?" Rocky said to Nick and Fetcher.
"Sure Guv'…what?" Nick asked, "Would you mind getting off my back?" said Rocky. "Oh, sorry" said Fetcher as he and Nick got up, "So Mac, where's Ginger?" Rocky asked. "She's preening herself" Mac answered, "Again?" Rocky replied. "Hey! We're out in the wild now, and this island has tons of fleas, unlike on the farm where it was a minor problem" Mac explained. "Yeah, I guess you're right, I hate fleas and ticks and to think I thought only dogs and cats could get them" said Rocky. "Oh, no birds can get them…" Mac stopped short she heard Nick and Fetcher laughing. "And rats too" she added "Um…" Nick dropped his sentence and tried to hide the embarrassed look in his eyes. He and Fetcher started whistling as if to cover up the embarrassment they felt. "Aha! See? Who's laughing now?" Mac replied with a laugh as Nick and Fetcher left the coop. "Mac? Are you the reason your old owners in Scotland sold you?" Rocky asked, trying to make a joke out of the question. "Very funny, are your feet as fast as your mouth?" Mac replied, "No…why?" Rocky answered. "I'm just sayin' you better watch what you say or else I could have Nick and Fetcher dog pile on you, again" Mac explained. "Wait! You planned this didn't you?" said Rocky, "Maybe I did and maybe I didn't" Mac answered with a laugh before she went outside. She and the other chickens including Ginger always got a laugh out of teasing Rocky, Fowler even put in his two cents once in a while. "What's up?" Ginger asked, she had just gotten back from preening herself. "Mac just played a joke on me" said Rocky, "Oh really?" Ginger replied she started laughing. "You had something to do with this didn't you?" Rocky asked. Ginger laughed, "I don't know where you got that idea but it won't get you very far" she said to Rocky.
"Well, what's that supposed to mean?" he asked Ginger who went outside. Bunty snickered and stood next to Rocky at the entrance of the coop. "Face it, Rock Ginger's one tough nut to crack, it didn't take me long to figure that out" said Bunty. "Maybe you're right" Rocky answered, but then he thought about it. "Hey wait a minute!" he said, and went after Bunty. Meanwhile back in Yorktown, things were looking good for the stray Border collie or so she thought. "Phew! At least I'm away from that monster dog" she said to herself. But then she heard a growl coming from behind her, "Then again, maybe not" she said. The dog snarled "Yipe!" said the Border collie before she took off running down the street. "Man! I can't believe he found me…ok gotta find a diversion" the collie said to herself. Just then, she saw PC mackintosh standing in front of the vitamin shop. "Ooh! Perfect!" said the Border collie, she stopped running and started barking at PC. "You crazy mongrel, get out of my site!" he said to her, the collie could see the Bulldog coming closer and with that she ran off down the block. The Bulldog however couldn't stop in time to keep from running into PC Mackintosh. "What the…?" before PC could finish his sentence the Bulldog crashed into him and knocked him down. The dog had seen the direction the collie fled, he was angry and wanted to follow her. He growled but it changed to a yelp when PC Mackintosh grabbed hold of his spiked collar. "This'll get you hard time in the pound, fella" PC said to him as he dragged the Bulldog to the pound down the street.
A few minutes later the Border collie had once again stopped to rest. All this running had made her very tired and she was panting heavily. "Wow! I made it, phew!" she said as she took her left paw and wiped some sweat off her forehead. Just then she heard Wallace's voice "C'mon Gromit, we've got a job to do" he said. They had gotten a call a few minutes ago from Lady Tottington she asked Wallace and Gromit to check the rabbit traps they had set on the outskirts of town. "Oh no! Humans! Hide!" thought the Border collie before Wallace could see her she hid in a knocked over trash can across the street. "Ok, keys, wallet and…" Wallace stopped short when he realized the keys to the anti pesto van weren't in his pocket. "Wait a minute… where are the keys?" he asked himself, Gromit sighed and went back into the house to look for the car keys. "Oh, thanks lad" said Wallace, just then he heard a loud clang. "Huh?" he said as he looked at the trash can across the street, "What could that be?" he asked himself as he walked across the street. He removed the trash can lid and saw the female Border collie, who was curled up in a ball. She was shaking and whimpering, "Oh, you poor dog…I didn't know there was a stray dog on this street" said Wallace. "Gromit, old pal c'mere and see what I've found" Wallace called out, Gromit grabbed the keys off the dining room table and went to see what Wallace was talking about. He came in the living room carrying the Border collie in his arms, she licked his cheek as a way of saying: "Thank you".
A short time later, Wallace and Gromit discovered that they had a real problem on their hands. "The poor thing must have been wondering the streets for days" said Wallace as he looked at the Border collie who had just finish a bowlful of dog food, Gromit nodded in agreement. "I mean look at her, she's nothing but skin and bones" Wallace added, he noticed the dog's ribs were slightly showing, Gromit nodded once more in agreement. "But with a little help, she'll be better…that's why she's staying here tonight" said Wallace. Gromit's eyes bucked, he looked at Wallace as if to say: "Are you kidding!" "Oh, come now, lad…she needs a place to stay at least till we figure out what to do with her, Gromit sighed he had to agree that the Border collie was in no condition to go back on the streets. Just then Wallace and Gromit were alerted by a buzzing noise coming from the other room. "Oh dear, we better get going" said Wallace, about 30 minutes later they stopped at the driveway of Tottington hall. Lady Tottington stood out front waiting for them. "You're late" she said to Wallace once he was out of the van. "Sorry, miss but we had another important situation on our hands" Wallace explained. "Important? What could be more important then this?" Lady Tottington asked. Gromit pointed to the van, the female Border collie had her head sticking out of the open window in the front seat of the van. "Oh! You poor thing" said Lady Tottington when she went up to the dog, "Where did you come from?" she asked as she stroked the collie's soft black fur. "We found her wondering the streets, she was hiding in a trash can" said Wallace. "Oh, you poor dog…look at you, you're nothing but skin and bones" said Lady Tottington who also noticed the collie's ribs that were slightly showing.
"I agree, she eats like she hasn't had a descent meal in years" Wallace explained. "I can't believe her owner would be so cruel, Border collies are such loyal dogs…I've always hated to see dogs wondering on the streets and they have no place to go" Lady Tottington explained. "I hope you're not planning to take her to the pound" she continued "Oh no, we would dream of that... She's stayin' with us, at least till she gets better" Wallace replied. "Good, a dog like her or Gromit doesn't deserve to be in the pound" Lady Tottington answered. "Having her around won't be such a problem if only we knew what her name is" said Wallace. Gromit pointed to the light turquoise colored leather collar that the collie was wearing. Lady Tottington looked at the round silver tag that hung from it. "Pilot" she said, "What? Oh, her name's Pilot" said Wallace who also looked at the tag. "That's a nice name" said Lady Tottington who smiled as she continued to stroke Pilot's soft fur. "What nationality do you suppose it is? I mean I've never heard of anyone or anything with that name before" Wallace answered (regarding Pilot's name). "I think its American" said Lady Tottington, "American, eh?" said Wallace.
"Yes, I mean look at this number and address, it's certainly not from around here" Lady Tottington explained. "You're right…well would you look at that Gromit, we got ourselves a yank dog, eh lad?" Wallace said to him, Gromit nodded. Pilot's tail began to wag, at least now somebody had recognized she wasn't from England. Her I.D. tag made it obvious by what was on it which was this:
Pilot
(310)-404-1024
Santa Monica, CA
"Yes! Finally someone has recognized I'm not from around here!" she thought. "You know, I've heard stories about this, her owners must have been here on holiday and dumped her when they had to leave" said Lady Tottington. "Maybe" Wallace replied, "That's what happened to you, isn't that right, girl?" Lady Tottington said to Pilot who wagged her tail once more. "That must have been what happened to her, there's no doubt about it" Lady Tottington continued, "Aye, that's harsh" Wallace said to her. "Yes it is, but as long as she's with you I know she'll be alright" she replied. "Oh, she sure will…Gromit and I plan to do a fine job on her, right lad?" Wallace answered. Gromit nodded in agreement, "I'm sure you will, all she needs is a bath and a few days to build up her strength and she'll be in good condition" Lady Tottington replied. But then she just thought of something "Uh…Wallace?" she said "Yes?" he answered. "I think you have another priority other then Pilot, right now" said Lady Tottington. "Oh right! The rabbit traps…c'mon Gromit" Wallace answered, Pilot whimpered she was out of the van but she wanted to follow them. Lady Tottington grabbed hold of Pilot's collar, Lady Tottington laughed she could see Pilot wanted to help and she admired that. "I think you better stay with me for now, girl" she said to Pilot who sighed.
1 hour later…
"Well the traps were pretty empty, although we did find 3 that happened to be occupied" said Wallace. He showed Lady Tottington his net which had 3 rabbits in it, one of them was gray, the second one was brown and the third was completely white. "Well as long as they stay here, there shouldn't be a problem with them messing with the farms down the road" said Lady Tottington. "Yes, but aren't most of the farms ones that have livestock? I mean I've seen two chicken farms when Gromit and I went down there, once" Wallace replied. "You're right, most of the farms down that road are livestock farms" Lady Tottington answered. She and Wallace along with Gromit and Pilot were all looking at a small road in the distance. It connected with the one Wallace and Gromit used to drive up to Tottington hall, only the rest of the road went passed it and had a turn farther down that led to the tri-county area where most of the farms were located including the Tweedy's chicken farm. "Well…I guess we better get going" said Wallace. "I suppose so, thank you Wallace" said Lady Tottington "Oh, think nothing of it, Gromit and I just look at it as another job well done" Wallace answered.
"Right Lad?" he said to Gromit, but then he realized he wasn't there! "Gromit? Where'd you go?" Wallace asked. Just then, he and Lady Tottington were alerted by a loud "beep" coming from the anti-pesto van. It was Gromit, who was waiting in the driver's seat, "Looks like he's already got a head start without you" Lady Tottington said with a laugh. "I guess he has…well, good bye" said Wallace, "Wait! Uh…you mind if I ask you something?" Lady Tottington asked. "Go ahead, what is it?" Wallace replied, "Did you plan to enter Gromit in the Yorktown dog show?" she asked. "Well, yes…I've got the flyer right here" said Wallace who showed it to her. "Interesting…did you happen to see who the list of judges are?" Lady Tottington asked. "Why, no I didn't…let's see PC Mackintosh and… you're one of the judges?" Wallace asked, "Yes" Lady Tottington answered. "Well that's grand… it wouldn't be much of an entertaining dog show without you, would it?" said Wallace "Very funny…but no, I guess not" Lady Tottington replied with a laugh. "Well, I suppose I'll see you around, huh Wallace?" she continued "I suppose so" he answered. "But wait, before you go I want to give you something, wait here…" she said to him and went in the house.
A few minutes later…
"Just to save you the hassle of mailing the flyer downtown, I happen to have a copy of the Yorktown dog show training manual" said Lady Tottington. "It lists all the standards and guidelines you'll need to follow, but I'm sure that won't be a problem, will it?" she added. "Oh, no problem at all, miss" Wallace replied. Once again, they heard another "beep" from the van, this time Pilot barked at Wallace and Lady Tottington. "Sorry!" Wallace called out to the two dogs, "I better go, they're starting to get restless" he said to Lady Tottington. "Well thanks again for stopping by" she said to him "Oh, it was no problem… you're welcome" Wallace answered as he got into the van. "So long Wallace, take good care of Pilot, you hear?" Lady Tottington shouted to him. "Will do, goodbye" he called back, the last thing Lady Tottington heard after that was one last "beep" from the van before it was out of site as it got farther down the road. She sighed, "He's such a kind man" she said to herself.
2 hours later…
"Well, another job well done, eh lad?" Wallace said to his dog. Gromit nodded, "Now to sit back to a nice slice of Wensleydale..." before Wallace could finish his sentence while he was looking the other way Pilot grabbed the cracker he was holding. "Hey!" Wallace said to her, Pilot barked back and wagged her tail. "Oh, you like it too huh?" Wallace asked her, "Well…" he started to say but then he heard Pilot whimper and stare at him with sad eyes. He could see that she had been through a rough life on the streets and what she needed now was some human comfort. "Alright one more, then…" said Wallace as he gave Pilot another cracker, "Now then…c'mon ol' girl" said Wallace as he got up and went into the kitchen. Pilot barked in response, Gromit just looked at her and sighed. Not that he was jealous or anything but still he cared about his friendship with Wallace and to have another dog like Pilot come into the picture had to take some getting used to. "See? Nothing a can of dog food can't fix, Gromit doesn't really care for the stuff…do you lad?" said Wallace. Gromit shook his head in reply, "You poor thing, livin' on the streets and nearly starved to death" Wallace said to Pilot with a sigh. "That's rough" he added.
A few minutes later…
"Well, make yourself at home" said Wallace as he led Pilot upstairs. She sniffed around the hallway, absorbing the different smells, most of them were Wallace and Gromit. "Until I make necessary repairs in that other room, you'll stay with Gromit tonight" Wallace explained. Gromit's eyes bucked, he had gotten used to Pilot but he and Wallace barely knew her and the fact Gromit had to share his room with her, seemed shocking to him. "Well, good night Pilot" said Wallace as he gave her a pat on the head. "And Gromit ol' pal…no tricks" Wallace said to him, Gromit whined and drooped his ears. "I'm just kidding, lad" said Wallace who gave Gromit a rub on the head to reassure him. "Good night Gromit" said Wallace before he closed the door, Pilot yawned and stretched out on the throw rug that was in the room. Gromit blinked when she yawned, he was surprised at how sharp and white her teeth were since she was a female dog. But now that he thought about it she was a different breed and the way her teeth looked was probably common for her type. Gromit went over to Pilot and nudged her with his nose, "What?" she said with a yawn. "Don't worry I'm not planning to steal your human" she continued, Gromit shook his head this wasn't what he meant. He gave her a hug as if to say: "You can stay here" Pilot's tail wagged once more. She liked Gromit as a friend, he proved to be much nicer then the dogs she used to know back in America. "See ya tomorrow" she said to Gromit before he flipped of the light. Pilot sighed, "Well, at least you're in a classy joint, it beats that trashcan on 3rd street" she thought before falling asleep.
MORE TO COME
Well that's chapter 3. Hope you liked it, Chapter 4 should be up by the weekend or next Monday. But please read and review, I know I might have said the Over the hedge parody was supposed to be in this chapter but look for it in chapter 4. Until then I hope you've enjoyed this new installment of "Every Dog Has Its Day"
The scene with Mac and
Rocky talking is actually a parody from the move Balto. The
line
"That'll get you hard time in the pound" is from Lady
and the Tramp 2: Scamp's adventure.
