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Chapter 4

Raven loved her automatic coffee machine, the smell of freshly ground beans, the sound it made when coffee sputtered into the cup. She chose a caffè latte that was mostly milk for Loki (he didn't really need a caffeine shot) and a double espresso for herself. After having handed him the glass, she returned to the kitchen in order to prepare breakfast for her husband.

Severus was up early today; he had already showered and dressed when he joined her in the kitchen. Apparently he was not in a good mood because he frowned at her, disapproval in his eyes.

"I do understand you want to help him. But does that necessarily include you leaving our bed in the middle of the night and presenting yourself to him half-naked?" Severus pointed out of the window at Loki who was still sitting on the terrace.

"Oh, I'm sorry I forgot to change clothes before I prevented him from falling down some eight-hundred feet." Raven said in a slightly snappish tone.

Severus arched a brow at her. "Why would he do that?"

"Apparently, he has a history with falling into abysses." She shrugged. "I don't know, Sev. It's not as if he would trust me and pour out his heart to me- I guess that's expecting too much. He opened up a little bit, though. I suspect there's something more to his attempting to throw himself off a high rise than just suicidal tendencies or sleepwalking, but he won't tell me- not yet- and it wouldn't be wise to use pressure on him."

"I don't like that. I don't like the idea of leaving you alone with him while I'm a thousand miles away in Kathmandu-"

"And you will not cancel your trip. Sev, a potioneers conference like that is only held every... how many years? Fifty? You will go, and you will leave it to me to worry about Loki. I can handle him."

"He's been here less than twelve hours and already we're arguing over him."

"I didn't start it, Sev. We agreed to help him, and I won't throw him out now just because you have a little fit of jealousy."

"It's not that. It's about you finding him at the edge of our terrace and suspecting there's something more to it he won't tell you. What if he's possessed?"

Raven recalled the strange blue glow of his eyes, his apparent disorientation when she'd pulled him back. "Yeah, something like that is likely. I will find out. Do you want to have breakfast now?"

Severus rolled his eyes. "Please do me the favour and contact Alice and debrief her."

"That, I will do." She needed more information anyway- for instance, what that Tessa-thing was Loki had mentioned.

ooOoo

He tried to remember the last time he'd seen the sun rise. It must have been the day of Thor's coronation when everyone in Asgard was so excited about the upcoming event and Loki... well, it was more like restlessness that had woken him early that day. Then, he hadn't cared for the beauty of it, hadn't revelled in the feeling of warmth on his face...

Now he enjoyed it, and he shook his head at the irony of it, given his frost giant parentage. Perhaps Laufey had been right to abandon him because he didn't even like cold.

Loki had just taken a seat in one of these outdoor armchairs when the witch returned, wordlessly placing a glass with a warm drink in his hands. Then she walked away again.

He frowned, still not quite knowing what to think of her. She seemed to be all kind and caring- but he had seen the rage in her eyes and suspected she wasn't really as soft as she appeared. And she had that uncanny aptness for snooping around the mind of others, him included.

It would be hard to make new plans if he couldn't find a way to keep her out of his mind. But that could wait. He was still much too tired and exhausted from the Void, the Chitauri and the hospitality of S.H.I.E.L.D to be back in the business.

First things first. Loki took a sip of his drink and found it agreeable. Too much milk, perhaps. After all, he wasn't an abandoned kitten she could hope to adopt with her stupid compassion. He'd already been adopted once too often...

Anger was rising up within him as he recalled how he'd found out about his true parentage, the inscrutable, non-existent expression on Odin's face. But for once, his rage was not getting the better of him. At the moment, he only felt.. nothing. A strange emptiness. He had no plan, no purpose, no place to go. His hands were still hurting. And yet something had changed- right after he'd almost made falling into an abyss a habit of his. The pressure was gone. All the time, ever since his arrival on earth, there had been an enormous pressure in his head, which had now ceased- he knew not why.

What did the Other do to me? Loki wondered, trying to remember exactly what had transpired from the moment the Chitauri found him until his arrival at that S.H.I.E.L.D base. He knew the Other had given him the sceptre... there were fragments of fleeting memories whirling around in his mind, too blurred, too vague to make sense. Disappearing too fast to grasp them.

It definitely was not helpful that the witch returned- again- asking him if he'd like to have breakfast. He'd almost managed to recall something, but that something had burst like a soap-bubble thanks to her untimely interruption. Loki turned his head to glare at her, about to lash out. Then he changed his mind. He was hungry. Very hungry.

"Breakfast sounds agreeable," he replied politely.

"Do you like anything in particular?" The witch asked.

Loki shook his head, feigning a meek smile. "Whatever you have.."

In the end, he ate a large bowl of yoghurt and fresh strawberries, savouring every spoon of sweet ripe fruits in combination with the slightly sour component of the yoghurt, only mildly sweetened with maple syrup. Then he had some more of the broth the witch had left on his bedside table last night, but now it also contained meat and vegetables that weren't overcooked. It was delicious.

After that he retreated to his room. The bed with its clean white sheets and pillows still looked alluring to him, but before he would allow himself the restoring properties of sleep, he felt the urge to clean himself.

There was a door that led to his private bathroom; the wizard had told him yesterday. Loki opened the door and glanced around; immediately understanding the concept of all the different constructions. Nice, he decided, and he had to admit that Midgardian sanitary facilities were decidedly more advanced than in Asgard- well, it wasn't really that hard to top a basin of cold water.

Here, the water just came pouring down on him like a summer shower but with adjustable temperature. He enjoyed it, wishing he could not only wash away the grime but also the memories that came with it.

After he was done in the bathroom, he slid under the covers of the bed, naked as he was, and was fast asleep only a moment later.

It was hard to tell when Loki woke, because his mind was alert long before he finally opened his eyes. The first thing he noticed was sunshine pouring in through the window. A smile curled up his lips. Sunshine meant no glass cage and white lights, casting no shadows. Soft sheets covered his body, the fabric not quite as exquisite as he was used to from his life as a prince of Asgard, but it was agreeable. He stretched his long limbs, feeling refreshed.

Then he glanced at the small clock sitting at his bedside table; it said 12:30. Almost lunchtime. He was hungry again.

Sitting up in bed, he decided that his usual black and green leather attire was perhaps a bit out of place in this environment. He wanted to look a little more... adapted- which also ruled out the elegant suit he wore for the premier in Germany, his favourite outfit when he had dealings with mortals; it simply would look too overdressed. So he opted for a more casual dress style, but he didn't have much reference except for the wizard... oh, and Stark.

Loki glanced at his reflection in the mirror and smirked. He was wearing jeans that looked casual although they were probably very expensive, in combination with a plain, black shirt. It gave him a totally unobtrusive appearance.

Now, he was back in the game.

A little later he left his room and walked down the corridor to the living room. The witch was busying herself in the kitchen, only separated from the rest of the room by a counter with some barstools sitting by it. Atop the counter stood a large bowl of fresh fruits, looking absolutely mouth-watering.

"Oh," the witch turned around and smiled at him, "you're finally up."

"A very astute observation. Had I known that such prestigious intellect actually existed it this realm-" Loki fell silent when his nose detected some very delicate aromas coming from the stove, and you just don't bite the hand that feeds you.

"You're feeling better, eh? Well, you definitely look much better." She arched a brow a brow at his new attire. "Nice clothes. I assume your magic is fully restored?"

He merely smirked at that.

"Are you hungry?" When he didn't reply, she continued. "You slept for almost thirty hours, you must be hungry. Help yourself to the fruits if you like."

Thirty hours? Well, I must have been really exhausted... He accepted her offer and reached for a peach, savouring the juicy sweetness of it.

"So what's for lunch?"

"Spaghetti vongole." She poured a generous dose of white wine into the frying pan before she explained, "spaghetti with clam shells. I don't know what you Asgardians like to eat, and since you were sleeping I couldn't ask you, so you will have to put up with what I like."

"It smells good." Loki admitted. "In Asgard, they like to devour great amounts of roasted meat- whole wild boars and pheasants. I... I was always a bit different. You don't have to roast a whole boar for me."

"Oh, now that's good," she quipped, smiling at him. "Could be a difficult to find a wild boar in New York City."

His lips twitched slightly. Although he had been raised as a prince of Asgard and therefore should be skilled at courteous small talk, it almost felt a bit strange now to have a normal conversation- he wasn't used to it anymore, after all the time in the void and the Chitauri and being muzzled. His little chat with Romanoff didn't count, that was all manipulation...

Sometime later, the witch placed down a plate in front of Loki. The food looked and smelled delicious. Clam shells in a sauce made of white wine, tomatoes, basil leaves and garlic. Well, and spaghetti; he wasn't familiar with food that came in the form of long white strings. Clandestinely, he watched how she handled them before he followed her example. Very soon he became a big fan of spaghetti.

ooOoo

Raven noticed the expression of bliss on his face- it made him look incredibly young. She smiled.

"I knew you'd like it. Everybody likes spaghetti. I think it's soul food- it gives you that warm feeling of comfort-"

Loki nibbled at his lips. "After all I've done you give me food and shelter?"

"No, because of what you've been through." Raven took the empty plates and carried them to the sink. "Espresso?"

Without waiting for his reply she made two espressos before she encouraged him to join her on the terrace. It was another warm and sunny day, and he still looked deathly pale. At least the dark shadows around his eyes were gone.

There were still a lot of questions she needed answers to, but she didn't want to push him; he would merely clam up. Besides, she got the feeling he'd been pushed too much already, and she wanted him to catch his breath again, relax, get grounded.

So she did most of the talking and actually managed to amuse him with her report of visiting the Union Square Greenmarket yesterday, followed by two agents of S.H.I.E.L.D- totally unobtrusive in their dark suits and sunglasses- and how she'd driven them almost mad by the way she had walked from stall to stall, comparing quality and prices.

"So S.H.I.E.L.D is still suspicious of you?" Loki asked after a while, nipping at his espresso.

"It's S.H.I.E.L.D we're talking about. It's their job to be suspicious. I knew Fury would spy on me, even if he considers me a harmless freak. However, spying is in his nature. But don't worry, you're safe here. We've got something that even Fury doesn't know about."

Loki arched a quizzical brow at her.

"Muggle-Repelling Charms." Raven answered with a smirk.

"Muggle?"

"Our term for all our non-magical fellow citizens."

"Tell me more about the magic of Midgard."

So Raven told him a couple of things, about wizarding schools and communities, the parallel society that existed next to the Muggle world, undiscovered most of the time.

Loki shook his head. "With all the powers you sorcerers of Midgard have, why don't you rule the other mortals? You seem to be lurking in the shadows-"

"Every now and then, a wizard comes up with the very same question and ends up striving for world domination, thinking the wizarding kind superior to Muggles. But we're not. Muggle technology is developing faster than most of us can grasp, and they majority of the wizarding race is happy with living the traditional way, untroubled by Muggles. They busy themselves with funny little household spells and prefer to communicate by sticking their heads into a dusty fireplace.

"The last Dark wizard who sought to subjugate this world lost his final battle back in 1998, although he was first defeated in 1981. I helped defeat him. I once looked into the face of pure evil, so full of malice he was far beyond redemption, and I laughed into his face and told him I was his worst nightmare, because I believed in love and friendship- mere sentiments in his eyes- but in the end much stronger than he'd ever expected. I defied him because of Severus. Because he'd been so foolish to believe in the Dark Lord's lies and almost made the wrong choice of joining his fraternity of Death Eaters. He was dangling at the edge but I pulled him back with reason and conviction."

For a long time, Loki didn't say anything, mulling her words. Then he asked, incredulously. "Your world in the balance and you defied this Dark Lord for... what? To save the man you love?"

"I never claimed to be a heroine. Sometimes, saving just one soul can change the result of a whole war. It did, then."

"Where's your dear husband anyway?"

"Kathmandu." Raven replied. "World's largest potioneers conference, held only every fifty years."

"And he left you all alone... with me."

"He trusts in my knowledge of the human nature."

"You're foolish enough to trust me." Loki said smoothly, only a hint of threat in his voice.

"Oh no, I don't." She reached out to pat his hand, now fully healed. "You know, Loki, this is not about trust. It's about giving you a chance."

He frowned at her, so she tried to elaborate on that.

"You're so damned close to the edge. You're damaged, broken-"

"You think you've figured me out, witch? You're wrong. You know nothing about me!"

"I'm just trying to find out more about you," Raven replied calmly, unimpressed by his anger. "There's so much I still want to know about that Tessa-thing, about the sceptre, about the Chitauri- what happened before the Void. I want to know more about Asgard, your life there before it all got out of control. Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to justify your deeds. I'm just trying to understand... and I haven't yet made up my mind just how much you are to be held responsibly for your actions. Clearly, you're not the totally innocent guy who's been wronged terribly- although I wouldn't rule out you've been wronged, either. I have to admit, I'm a very inquisitive person, but I won't push you."

"But you won't let go either." Loki concluded, offering her a disarming smile.

Raven smiled back at him. "Take your time."

"Speaking of time- isn't it time for dinner?"

"You're deflecting." She rolled her eyes at his smug smile, but he was still alarmingly thin beneath his glamour, and she wondered when he'd eaten last. Certainly not while being held captive and muzzled at S.H.I.E.L.D, and she mightily doubted the Chitauri had been more hospitable.

"I'm hungry. Just because I can survive without food for a long time doesn't mean I don't enjoy it."

"Well then, I marinated some lamb chops yesterday. We can put them on the charcoal grill and have a Greek salad along with them."

Her suggestion seemed to please him so Raven got up and went to the kitchen in order to prepare the salad, hoping that she could bait him with a good meal to tell her more. She didn't want to manipulate him with his appetite... well, but it couldn't harm to try either.

When she returned to the terrace, she was surprised to see he had already lit the charcoal. Most likely he had done it from where he was sitting, using magic.

"Thank you," Raven said and smiled as she placed a large bowl with salad on the table. Immediately, he moved closer to take a look at it. Apparently he liked what he saw.

Loki seemed to have a favour for anything that was not a roasted wild boar; he relished fresh things and he ate with great indulgence, savouring each bite in an almost elegant way. For someone who enjoyed cooking and took pride in her skills, it was a pleasure to watch him because it praised her work more than any verbal flattery.

Raven didn't want to disrupt the pleasant atmosphere by bothering him with questions- that could wait, give him time- so she merely made some small talk. He surprised her, though, when he revealed some trivia about his life in Asgard, making it obvious that he had always been an outsider there.

Our parents kept the truth from him because they didn't want him to feel any different.

Well, but he was different, in every possible aspect. Loki wasn't the strong, fierce warrior which was the manly norm there. He liked magic and cunning, preferred to use his sharp intellect instead of his muscles, would rather spend his time in the library than on a battlefield. He liked a good glass of wine instead of getting drunk on mead, and he liked to eat fruits and vegetables when all the others would devour great amounts of meat. He was different.

"Have you never wondered about that? I mean, before you found out you were adopted?" Raven couldn't help but ask incredulously.

They had finished eating but were still sitting outside, enjoying a bottle of Rioja Gran Reserva.

His eyes narrowed. "Who told you? Was it Thor? What else did he tell you? Did he tell you about my true parentage?"

She was a bit surprised about the sudden anger in his voice, how it seemed to increase with every question- but beneath all that anger, there was also a hidden trace of tremendous hurt and despair.

"He merely told me you're adopted and that your parents lied to you until about a year ago. I must admit that's crass."

"Oh, do you? Do you have any idea what's it like to not only find out you've been lied to for all of your life but also that you're actually the offspring of monsters parents tell their children about at night?"

"What?"

"Look at me!"

Raven did- actually, she had never taken her eyes off him ever since that anger had piqued up in his voice. But he didn't want her to just look at him. He wanted to show her something, a memory.

Loki picked up a casket, ornamented metal and runes containing a shining, bluish light. Suddenly, the colour of his skin began to change, starting from his hands, crawling up his arms, his body, to his face, turning it blue. His eyes were glowing red like the charcoals...

"What do you see now?" His voice seemed to come from very far away since Raven seemed to be still standing in the vault of his memories, watching him.

"Um... deleted scene from Avatar?"

'Stop!' A voice of authority shouted at Loki and he turned around, turning from blue skin back to his normal skin colour as he asked, 'Am I cursed?'

"What?" Loki asked perplexed.

Raven didn't reply. She was still in that scene in his mind, staring up a staircase to where Odin Allfather was standing in all his imposing glory, glancing down at his son. It was like a film reel winding on without anyone being able to stop it. She realized that Loki tried to, and she really didn't want to pry about in his mind, but the scene just kept on playing...

'What more than that?' There was a sharp edge in Loki's voice now as he approached the Allfather. 'The casket wasn't the only thing you took from Jotunheim that day, was it?'

'No.' Odin admitted, and then he told Loki that in the aftermath of the battle he went into a temple where he found a baby, small for a giant offspring, abandoned, suffering, left to die.

'Why?' Loki asked, totally stunned. 'You were knee-deep in Jotun blood- why would you take me?'

And he seemed to realize immediately that Odin was still lying to him when he said, 'You were an innocent child.' He knew that Odin took him for a purpose.

'TELL ME!' He screamed with so much anger and desperation in his voice...

...The memory was so full of emotions Raven almost felt the same pain, anger and desperation. It was as if she'd been sucked right into Loki's mind, sharing the same emotions. And still, there was no way to stop it, no way to cast a projection of that scene and watch it from a safe distance as a neutral observer.

It didn't matter what Odin's plans for Loki where. The revelation shattered him within seconds; the realisation of being lied to for an eternity hit him hard, destroyed any ideas of trust.

'What?' He breathed, barely audible, panting, trying to regain some countenance. 'So I'm not more than another stolen relict, locked up here until you might have use of me?'

Raven knew he wasn't twisting Odin's words and she didn't believe him that he only wanted to protect Loki from the truth

'Why? Because I... I... I'm the monster parents tell their children about at night?'

Finally, the memory ended and Raven felt like she was being spit out of Loki's mind, landing hard on her back...

Loki had grabbed her by the throat and hurled her across the terrace.

"Ouch!" She gasped, getting up slowly. He was standing some feet away, nibbling at his lip, looking slightly ashamed. "What the fuck- damn, I didn't start this; it wasn't my intention to pry about and intrude into something as private as-"

"SHUT UP!" Loki appeared as if he wanted to run away, very far away, but was being constrained by the borders of the terrace. He was panting; his magic seemed to explode in an outburst of golden-green sparks, veiling him in a strange aura of light and energy.

If she approached him now, he would probably kill her.

"Loki, I didn't want to see that. I was not mind-raping you. The scene was winding on and I couldn't stop it. I'm sorry. I have no idea what happened. You asked me to look at you; you wanted to show me something- your Jotun form, I assume. You wanted to prove me you're a monster- but you're not. No one is born to be a monster; it's not in your blood or in your parentage. It's a decision; it's about the choices you make."

"Do you ever stop babbling?" Now he was shaking like a leaf, looking all haunted and breathless.

"Rarely." Raven offered him a smirk. "You'll have to hurl me across the terrace more often to achieve that."

"I..." He turned his back on her.

That was as much of an apology as she would ever get; he was much too proud to admit that it wasn't very gentlemanly to hurl his nice and caring hostess across the terrace. But it was the little things that gave him away, like the slumping of his shoulders. The revelation of his true parentage had broken him, had turned him from an Asgardian prince into the monster parents tell their children about at night, and now he tried his best to live up to the expectations. Idiot!

Raven heaved a sigh. "I need a cigarette break."

She crossed the terrace, heading for the door. Before she entered the living room, she turned around to glance at him.

"Can I trust you to stay away from the edge and not doing anything stupid, like running away?"

"Ooh, am I your prisoner now?" Loki asked in a mocking tone, challenging her from a safe distance. "What will you do to keep me here?"

"Keep you? You're not my prisoner, Loki. If you want to leave- there's the door. But it would be downright stupid of you to leave with S.H.I.E.L.D still searching for you. They found you via face trace before and they will find you again. So, unless you yearn to be back with them and your best friend, Agent Barton, I'd recommend you to stay here and keep a low profile. But it's all up to you." Without giving Loki a chance to reply, Raven went indoors offering him a moment to calm down and catch his breath again.

The moment she entered the kitchen, tears were streaming down her face. The memory was still too vivid in her mind. Could there possibly be a worse way to find out you're not what you were made believe to be, realizing you've been lied to for thousand years?

She lit a cigarette, trying to catch her own breath again. Although she wasn't generally of a cruel or violent nature, she nevertheless longed to use the Cruciatus Curse on Odin, no matter if he was a god or a demigod or simply a cold-hearted bastard.

Raven hoped that having to relive this traumatic memory all over again had not triggered something in Loki, setting him off on a rampage. She glanced through the kitchen window and was relieved to see him still standing on the terrace, apparently staring into space.

Admittedly, it was perhaps an absurd idea. Nevertheless she turned on the stove and opened the fridge, remembering she had prepared two more chocolate volcanoes the other day.

When she returned on the terrace a little later, Loki was sitting in his chair again, holding his head in his hands.

ooOoo

He'd gone too far and he knew it. He always knew it in the end. That, however, wouldn't stop him from going too far the next time, pushing the limits over and over again.

This time, he'd truly outdone himself. He'd pissed off the only person who still cared about him and was willing to give him a chance. But he'd cast it to the wind- it wouldn't even surprise him if she had called S.H.I.E.L.D by now, asking them to pick him up.

He hadn't wanted to hurt the witch. Not intentionally, at least. He had merely wanted the memory to end, and with it the pain and the shame and all his damned emotions. Pathetic! He wished he could simply stop feeling, but the betrayal still hurt, making him remember all the times he'd felt different and scorned.

The witch returned and slipped a plate with a small dark cake in front of him.

Loki glanced up to her with an expression of utter incredulity on his face.

"Monster feeding time." She said, trying to make her voice sound light but he noticed the strain in it. He also noticed the treacherous traces of tears on her cheeks.

"You cried."

"I was angry." The witch snuffled, stubbornly wiping her eyes- probably not the best idea because now she was smearing her mascara even more. Loki decided to not mock her about it, he'd done enough damage for tonight and was still surprised that she offered him cake instead of returning him to S.H.I.E.L.D.

"I was- perhaps- reacting a bit too drastic," he admitted. Oh, but the cake smelled good...

"Glad we can agree on that. Now, eat, Beastie Boy. Before it gets cold."

Frowning at her, Loki dug his spoon into the cake, realizing it was all liquid inside. He took a tentative bite... and was overwhelmed by the sensation it caused to his taste buds. It wasn't like anything he had ever tasted before. It was slightly bitter, rich in flavour, and yet there was also a delicate sweetness to it. Pure, utter bliss.

He must have released a sigh of pleasure, because the witch gave him a smug smile.

"Am I right to assume you don't have chocolate in Asgard?"

Loki tried to turn his expression back into a mask of cool indifference... but failed when he took another spoonful.

"You should try it with a sip of wine; it's a great combination."

He followed her advice and had to admit she was right. The combination of wine and chocolate seemed to increase the flavour of both products and gave him the feeling of- well, it wasn't like coming home from a long journey since he didn't have a home anymore; it was more like arriving and being welcome.

He had absolutely no idea why she was doing this; she really shouldn't be so... kind... not after he had vent his rage on her, throwing her across the terrace, not caring if that could possibly kill her fragile mortal body. His outburst had shocked even him, albeit not enough to break his pride and apologize.

"Why?" Loki asked after a while, too curious to remain silent any longer. "Are you really that foolish to believe food would render me docile?"

"No, I thought we could both use some comfort food after the recent events. Don't you agree?"

When Loki didn't reply, she continued. "You know, I don't want to pester you with all my silly sentiments, but I still believe you deserve a second chance. But before I go on- could we at least agree on that there will be no more throwing me around while you're staying at my place?"

He thought about it for a moment, then he agreed.

"What's Avatar?"

The witch shot him a puzzled glance, then she chuckled. "Ah that- well, Avatar was a movie a blue-skinned humanoid species from another planet. It was a big commercial success."

"Are you trying to mock me, witch?"

"No, you wanted me to see the monster in you, but I failed. Blue skin and red eyes aren't really that scary, and to be honest, for a frost giant you're not... um-"

"Tall enough?" Loki offered. "I believe that's why Laufey left me to die."

"Laufey?"

"The late king of the Jotuns, my dear father."

She detected the sarcasm in his voice; she was a clever little witch. "What happened to him?"

Loki picked up his wine glass, took a sip and then relaxed in his chair, before he replied smugly. "I tricked him into entering Asgard with the promise of murdering Odin in his sleep. When he was about to do so, I killed him."

There may be a couple of things he'd done that he regretted, this was definitely not one of them.

"What about your mother?"

"She witnessed me saving Odin and for a moment-" He fell silent, realizing his mistake. Frigga was not his mother. The witch had asked about his biological mother, and actually that was an interesting question. "I don't know. Probably just a nameless slut."

"Or a war bride? If I understood correctly you were found in the aftermath of a battle. I admit, I don't know anything about Asgardians or Jotuns, but I know that wars in general aren't fought on battlegrounds alone. There are other means than just swinging the axe or firing missiles; there's often also the terrorizing aspect."

His fingers tightened around the glass, almost crushing it in his hand. Perhaps, he shouldn't have killed Laufey that fast. On the other hand, it was bad enough to know he was of frost giant origin, so why make things worse and find out he was also a product of rape?

"You know, Loki, it doesn't matter who fathered you or gave birth to you. In the end, all that matters is who raised you, who gave you love and shelter and ideals. Of course, they should have told you where you came from as soon as you were old enough to understand. Knowledge doesn't necessarily bring happiness, but hiding the truth from you for so long was a very stupid way to not make you feel any different. It could only lead to disaster.

"Anyway, you have to come to terms with it. You can't change what happened. You will have to live with that knowledge; it will be part of you and never go away. Maybe one day it will hurt less and not appear as a betrayal to you, but until then, don't let it shatter you. You're more than that. Your Jotun background is nothing but a genetic code; it doesn't mean anything. It's still up to you to define what kind of man you want to be."

He listened; he heard her out. He didn't let his anger get the better of him. Didn't tell her to mind her own business because apparently she had made him her business, and he was still surprised she hadn't given up on him despite the way he had treated her.

Loki took another sip of wine, trying to recall the days when he used to be the level-headed one. The one who used his brain- contrary to Thor, who always preferred a display of his physical strength.

"Have you ever talked about these things before?" The witch asked.

"Will you ever stop pestering me with questions?"

"I'm of an inquisitive nature; it's part of my job."

"Your job?"

"Yeah, I'm working for the WIIA, the Wizarding Investigation and Intelligence Agency. We investigate magically related crimes and although we do cooperate with Muggle authorities, we're an independent-"

"So this is no more than an interrogation, but with food and wine as a bait for my cooperation?" He suddenly felt foolish for believing the witch actually cared about him.

"No." She actually possessed the nerve to roll her eyes at him and she grabbed his arm to stop him from getting up and walking away. Loki glared down at her. "Please stay. This is still a conversation. I'm not interrogating you; I merely want to get to know you better."

"And if I want to end this conversation now?" He snapped.

She let go off his arm. "That would be regrettable- but if you want to leave, please don't leave in anger. I'm not trying to fool you. I'm not at work at the moment. Actually, I'm on an unpaid leave for a couple of days just to enjoy the pleasure of your company.."

"Nevertheless, I will go to bed now."

"Sleep well, Loki." The witch chirped.

thanks to ellennar for beta reading