WARNING: This story contains; Graphic Violence, Foul Language, and Possible Lemons

Disclaimer: I DO NOT own Naruto or the contents of Naruto, I only own my own original ideas

Chapter 4

"Hello Naru-kun" she spoke gracefully, a small smile adorning her lips.

"Hi Ja-chan!" Naruto screamed in excitement.

"Now, now you know I want you to call me Jashi-chan" Jashin gently corrected.

"I know Shi-chwan" Naruto nodded.

"Then are you trying to test my patience?" Jashin questioned with a raised eyebrow.

"Of course Jan-koi" He admitted unabashed.

Jashin rose from her throne with a slow elegance. She crossed her arms under her chest before she closed her eyes with a sigh.

"It seems I must teach you a lesson in manners Naru-kun" Naruto grinned wide.

"Yay!" he squealed "game time, tag you're it" no sooner had he spoken than he dashed off.

Jashin slowly opened her eyes to see Naruto disappear into the dense foliage.

"Oh my, what ever will I do?" Jashin feigned distress "Naru-kun is so cute" and with that see began to move after him, gliding across the ground with unearthly grace.

Naruto blurred through the forest at incredible speeds. The only sure way to tell he had been there a mere moment before was the echoing giggle left in his wake. As he dashed further and further away from Jashin he let the feeling of inevitable victory well up in his chest only to have it snatched away when she made her move. With a wave of her hand Naruto was yanked from the ground by an unseen force.

Jashin made her way into a clearing and beheld an amusing sight. She began to lightly chuckle as she surveyed Naruto's predicament. He was being held off the ground by his throat. His bandaged arm had betrayed him at Jashin's command and hung itself over a tree branch before tightly griping Naruto's wind pipe, effectively forcing Naruto to hang himself with his own arm.

"No fair" Naruto whined unimpaired by his current pose.

"You never specified any rules Naru-kun" Jashin said still chuckling.

"Meanie" Naruto huffed at her.

"Aw don't be that way" she smiled warmly at him "Are you not glad that I am here?"

Naruto's eyes softened and he nodded. Jashin released him with another wave and he walked over to her so he could hug her around the waist.

"I missed you Jashi-chan" he spoke as she wrapped her arms around his small frame.

"I know Naru-kun, I know" she softly stroked his hair.

"Have I done good?" He asked looking up at her with hope shining in his eyes.

Jashin smiled warmly at him and squeezed him tight as she nodded.

"Yes Naru-kun, you have" a bright smile made its way across Naruto's face "Thanks to the ritual you preformed I now have more influence in this word" Naruto beamed brighter "With this I will be able to manifest every time you invoke me with a blood sacrifice" Naruto's smile was quickly approaching giga-watt "I think you deserve a reward"

"Yeah I get cool shit!" Naruto broke away from the hug to do a happy dance.

Jashin giggled lightly at his antics.

"As my avatar I believe you have earned the right to use one of your powers" as Jashin spoke a purple flame left her palm and entered Naruto's chest.

"Awesome!" he exclaimed "So what is it? Super cool jutsu or an ultimate finishing move" despite his changes some of his old tendencies still remained.

"You now have access to the weapons stored inside the seals on your right arm" Jashin said around a massive grin.

Using the knowledge that came with the power Naruto quickly unsealed his weapons. In a flare of blue fire three wicked, onyx scythes embedded themselves in the ground directly in front of Naruto.

"Kick ass!" his excitement was reaching a fevered pitch "What can these do?"

"Tsk tsk Naruto, you know that you must discover that on your own" Jashin teased him.

"Aw okay Jashi-chan" Naruto's mood settled.

"Though I wish to say here with you for eternity I must attend to other, less important, matters" Jashin sighed in displeasure at having to leave her 'Naru-kun'.

"What already?" you could see the disappointment on Naruto's face.

"Don't worry Naru-kun we shall bask in each other again soon" she reassured him as she collected him in a hug.

"Okay" Naruto relented.

"Till that time my love" she kissed his forehead before vanishing in a flash of purple.

With her exit the world's color and sound returned in a surge. Naruto sighed softly before collecting his new scythes and starting his trek to return to the others. Though he wished it had lasted long, his time with Jashin had lifted his mood entire worlds.

\/\\/\\/\\/\\/\\/

Tazuna and his remaining guards walked at a brisk pace, for a civilian. Tazuna wanted to bitch his heart out that he was tired but the quicker they made it to Wave the better. Despite his fatigue Tazuna's caught a muffled noise.

"Hey do you guys hear that?" he questioned the others.

He was slightly alarmed at their blatant disregard to his question. This quickly grew in to worry and then panic as the noise grew louder the close it approached.

"Hey shouldn't you, I don't know, be more on edge?" he asked as he started to sweat.

Sasuke and Sakura looked at each other before shrugging. Anko scoffed at him. Kakashi plain ignored him in favor of his book. This only further set Tazuna into a frenzy. He was just about to run for it when the sound emanated from the other side of bushed to their left. Before he could sprint for his life Naruto burst through the bushes singing his head off.

"ON THE FOURTH DAY OF COURTING DEATH MY TRUE LOVE GAVE TO ME!" Naruto paid no mind to Tazuna as he shrieked like a little girl "FOUR SEVERED HEADS, THREE TORMENTED SOULS, TWO SHE DEVILS, AND A HANGED MAN IN A GALLOWS TREE!"

Tazuna at this point was clutching his chest and gasping for breath.

"Oh! Hey guys" Naruto broke from song to greet his teammates "ON THE ... what day was I on?" he began to start again but he had seemingly lost his place "Oh well I'll just pray then" he decided.

"Why *pant* didn't anyone *pant* warn me?!" Tazuna demanded.

"Yea, though I walk through this mortal world" Naruto began.

"What do you mean?" Sakura asked.

"I shall fear no creature" Naruto recited.

"HIM!" he shouted as he pointed to Naruto.

"For I am the shadow of death" Naruto continued not really caring that they were talking about him.

"Why would we warn you about him?" Sasuke joined in.

"My goddess walks with me for I am her chosen"

"He damn near gave me a heart attack" Tazuna had claimed down by this point.

"Her wish is my command, her will compels me"

"I don't see how, we heard him coming from a hundred yards away" Sakura looked clueless.

"I bask in the agony that she rains upon us; I drink deeply from the river of blood left in her wake"

"I picked up his singing from two" Sasuke commented like it was the weather.

"Praise be to her for she is the pain, the suffering, my goddess forever" Naruto finished his pray in time for his fellow ninja to start a pissing match.

"I got him at fifteen" Anko stated proudly.

Naruto just sat back and watched, bemused by the spectacle.

"I have been following his progress to us since he entered a mile radius of us" Kakashi said off handedly as he kept his face in his book.

Anko and Sasuke gaped at him while Sakura and Tazuna wrote him off. Naruto nodded expecting nothing less form the Copy-nin.

"Still I find it hilarious you were even scared in the first place" Anko snickered at Tazuna.

"My hearing isn't as good as you ninja" he pouted.

"That's not it" she waved him off "It's that anything that didn't flee the forest when Naruto entered is most certainly a rotting corpse by now"

Tazuna went to voice his disbelief until he noticed the thick trail of blood that led out of the bushes and ended at Naruto's feet. More dripped off him as it seemed he had filled all his pockets with it.

"You have nothing to fear so long as Naruto is here" Anko pointed out "Well nothing but Naruto himself"

\/\\/\\/\\/\\/\\/

No much time passed before the group was met with a large body of water and a small boat waiting for them. Tazuna, Sakura, and Sasuke all climbed in while the two jonin began to walk on the water. Naruto was resting, using Anko's trench coat as a hammock by connecting it to Kakashi's arms with ninja wire. He napped the entire trip across the water and awoke on his own once they made land fall. With a little yawn and a stretch he disconnected Anko from Kakashi and resumed walking.

Barely any distance was crossed before Sasuke got trigger happy and impaled a snow rabbit with a kunai. He didn't have a chance to feel ashamed as they were all forced to duck when a massive blade whirled over head like a buzz saw. Naruto, being the only one not to take cover, was struck full force in the jugular and dropped to the ground.

"One down" said a shirtless man as he appeared a few yards from the downed Naruto.

Naruto's squad mates took up battle stances. The man quirked a non-existent eyebrow.

"Man they grow the genin stone cold in the Leaf these days" he snarked around a face covered in bandages.

"He's not dead" Kakashi spoke still reading his book.

"Don't try to bulllshit me Copy-nin Kakashi" he demanded while letting them know he had read Kakashi's bingo book entry.

Naruto defended the statement as he stood back up, blade lodged through to his spinal column. He cracked his neck twice in either direction before facing the man.

"What trickery is this?!" the man demanded "Has Suna started teaching you how to use puppets?"

"You now for Zabuza, Demon of the Bloody Mist" Naruto pegged him from his own entry in the bingo book "He sure is skeptical" Naruto spoke looking back at his fellow Leaf shinobi.

"Oh, then how have you survived a sword to the throat?" Zabuza shot at him, irked at his snide remark.

"Simple" Naruto leered "I am immortal" he proclaimed.

"Are you stupid?" Zabuza sweat dropped.

"Not its true" Sasuke cut in "Yeah" Anko followed "Yep" Kakashi chimed in, face still planted in pages "Freaky but fact" Sakura shivered.

Even Tazuna nodded his own agreement.

"Even if you are immortal all of your lives will end if you don't hand over the bridge builder" Zabuza threatened.

"Doesn't he know what immortal means" Naruto asked with stress on the word 'immortal'.

Zabuza went to shoot expiates at him but he had to dodge as Naruto tore the sword from his neck and launched it at him. He barely had time to seize the blade before Naruto thrust his arm forward and three scythes exploded toward him. Deftly dodging the blades he went to brag when he had to evade again when they returned of their own accord to hover around Naruto.

"See that's just plain not fair" Zabuza whined.

"We are ninja, fair isn't in the job description" Kakashi chimed in as Naruto just leered at the missing-nin.

Off to the side Tazuna, Anko, and Sasuke where engaged in a side conversation.

"What do you feed genin in your village?" Tazuna cracked.

"Don't look at me" Anko defended "I didn't even know the little bastard could do that"

"If they fed us something to make us like that we would have taken over the other hidden villages by now" Sasuke reasoned.

Tazuna nodded While Anko shook her head.

"I they feed genin Naruto juice we would have taken over the whole damn world" Anko waved her hands above her head.

"If I had some Naruto juice Itachi would be so fucking toast" Sasuke spoke as he pondered the possibility.

"If I had some Naruto juice Gato would be toast" Tazuna sighed without realizing what he had let slip.

"Gato the shipping tycoon?" Anko asked as she squinted at the bridge builder "Is that why missing-nin are after your old drunk ass?"

"Um... well.. you see" Tazuna sweated as he couldn't come up with any excuses.

"Leave him be Anko" Sasuke cut in "You know Naruto will want to do this mission even more when he hears about this"

Anko sighed before speaking "You know the jonin are supposed to be in charge"

"You are" Sasuke reassured "It is just that you are making the wisest choice by following the whims of Naru-ku... I mean Naruto" Sasuke slipped.

"I suppose you're right" Anko failed to catch his mistake as she sighed to herself.

Back to the very one sided battle. Zabuza was currently on the run as Naruto rained down a never ending cyclone of scythes. Every time Zabuza avoided one Naruto would fling another his way as the previous scythe made its return trip. It seemed that Zabuza would soon tire and then lose his life at Naruto's hands. This however was not the case as Naruto landed a hit that pieced the ninja's left leg he ceased his assault. He walked slowly to the downed man but instead of ending his life as he stood before him Naruto bent down to whisper in his ear. Zabuza's eyes widened in shock to whatever Naruto had said before three needles impaled his throat.

"Thank you for your assistance" A masked figure appeared before Naruto "I am a hunter-nin from the Mist sent to take down this missing-nin"

"Cease your incessant squawking and be gone with Zabuza" Naruto commanded in a harsh manner.

The hunter-nin simply nodded before disappearing with Zabuza's body.

"Man I hate it when insignificant punks speak to me like I give any kind of fuck about them or their bullshit" Naruto ranted.

He turned to the others who quickly looked away while whistling. He pointed at Sasuke and called him forward with a hand gesture. When he was a few feet from Naruto he was struck in the face with Naruto's shirt.

"Carry that for me" Naruto commanded "It's all sweaty from my fight with the eyebrow less asshole"

Sasuke blushed deeply at the sight of a shirtless Naruto but it went unnoticed by everyone there. As they continued Sasuke slowly let the others pass him until he was a few feet behind them all. When this safe distance was achieved he held Naruto's shirt up to his face and began to breathe deeply the scent of the immortal. He made sure no one noticed him. This was how he spent the remainder of the walk to Tazuna's house. Unbenonced to him Naruto was staring at him out of the corner of his eye and smirking evilly at the sight.

\/\\/\\/\\/\\/\\/

When his house came into view Tazuna quickly ran for the front door. He knocked loudly three times and ducked under the frying pan that came careening towards his head. He pushed the woman who attempted to brain him out of the threshold and made his way inside. Hurried noises could be heard from the open front door before Tazuna remerged from the house and stood there potentially. When the leaf team, headed by Naruto, reached his door step he fell to his knees.

"Oh mighty Naruto-dono I am humbled that you would grace my household" Tazuna spoke while looking at the ground "Please partake in anything my home has to offer" he made and ushering pose as he awaited Naruto to enter his house.

"You know, for an old drunkard he sure does learn fast" Anko whispered to Kakashi as they followed Naruto into the house.

Kakashi merely nodded. Tazuna waited until they were all inside before he stood and brushed the dirt from his pants. He closed the door behind him as he entered.

\/\\/\\/\\/\\/\\/

Once everyone inside Naruto looked to Sasuke as the woman from before came out of the kitchen holding a bruise on her head.

"I want my shirt back Sas-Uke" he jabbed at the raven haired boy's sexuality.

"SASUKE'S NOT GAY!" Sakura roared.

Naruto calmly took his shirt from Sasuke's out stretched hands and put it on before high kicking Sakura right in the forehead. Sakura blasted into a wall and was rendered unconscious.

"You shouldn't treat a lady like that" the woman chided.

Before Naruto could retort Tazuna latched onto the back of her neck and forced her into a kneel that he mimicked beside her.

"Forgive her Naruto-dono she knows not to whom she speaks" the woman was caught off guard before she tried to break Tazuna's grip on her neck.

"What the hell dad!?" she demanded "What are you doing"

Tazuna didn't answer as he remanded in a humble position as Naruto waked up to them.

"So this is your daughter hmm?" Naruto chuckled "Who the bloody hell is desperate enough to let your saggy balls pound them?" Naruto started laughing.

"Yes she is my only child" Tazuna made no remark on Naruto's insult "She is Tsunami and together with her son Inari are the only family I have" Tazuna informed "So please spare her"

Tsunami was beginning to worry as she had never seen her father give anyone this much respect.

"Seriously old man you need to lighten up" Naruto wiped a tear from his eye "I can't kill you or your family, well I can but Sarutobi's old ass would never stop bitching at me" Naruto chuckled again and both Sasuke and Anko had to stifle their own giggles.

"On to serious matters" Kakashi stepped forward "We should turn in for the night" he advised "How many rooms do you have?"

Tazuna released Tsunami and stood "Tsunami, Inari, and I all have our own rooms and there are two guest rooms"

"Well the proper thing to do is..." Kakashi was stopped speaking when Naruto raised a hand.

"Me and Sasuke will share a room" Sasuke made no signs of protest "Anko will get the other guest room while you will share with Tazuna should anyone attempt to off him while we sleep" he said pointing at Kakashi.

"What about your pink haired teammate?" Tsunami asked with concern for the girl.

"She sleeps where I have left her to lie" Naruto spoke coldly before turning to Tazuna "Lead me to my room" Tazuna obeyed and everyone settled down for the night.

\/\\/\\/\\/\\/\\/

/LIME TIME/

\/\\/\\/\\/\\/\\/

It was the dead of night and everyone was asleep when Sasuke was awoken. He was forcefully dragged out of his futon and into a corner. He was deposited between Naruto's legs, his back resting against Naruto's chest. Sasuke's breath hitched as he felt Naruto's breath on his neck.

"Did you enjoy smelling my shirt?" Naruto asked him as he wrapped an arm around Sasuke's abdomen and he gently gripped Sasuke's neck with his other hand.

Sasuke nodded as his heart sped up.

"I'm Hungry Uke-chan" Sasuke's body began to heat up as his breath shortened "If you satisfy my hunger I'll reward you"

Sasuke nodded again as his voice failed him and he began to shiver in anticipation.

"Good now I want you to think back to your most painful memory" Sasuke didn't understand the request but he obeyed none the less "Remember the day when your clan was murdered"

Pain welled up in Sasuke's heart as he remembered that terrible day. Naruto put his mouth just under his right ear and inhaled deeply. As he did a thick purple miasma wafted from Sasuke and into Naruto's mouth. The more the purple fog Naruto consumed the more Sasuke realized the pain in his heart was fading.

"Delicious Uke-chan but I'm not full" Naruto licked Sasuke's neck "Now remember Itachi and all that he did to you that night"

Sasuke once again remembered and once again pain welled up inside his heart. This time however the pain was too much to contain and he began to weep. Before he could banish the memory Naruto began to inhale again though this time the miasma was much darker. Sasuke could feel the pain of the memory seep away. He didn't understand how Naruto was doing it, all he knew was that Naruto was somehow taking his pain and easing his sorrow.

"Hmmm" Naruto sighed out "That was very tasty Uke-chan and you have earned your reward"

Sasuke gasped as he felt Naruto's fangs sink deeply into his neck. Naruto began to suck lightly and Sasuke could only moan out at the sensation. As Naruto pulled away from Sasuke's he licked the blood that escaped his broken skin.

"We're not done yet" Naruto whispered "We've got all night Uke-chan"

Sasuke lost track of time as Naruto continued to assault his neck. Not that he really much cared; he was too busy enjoying his reward.

\/\\/\\/\\/\\/\\/

/LIME OUT/

\/\\/\\/\\/\\/\\/

As the sun slowly rose over the horizon the residents of the house all made their way to a singular destination, the kitchen. Naruto was the first there but was quickly followed by Tsunami. She remembered yesterday and bowed when he looked at her and quickly scurried off to make breakfast. Kakashi and Anko appeared next though Anko looked like she was not at all happy to be up. Tazuna and a small boy who must have been Inari took their seats sometime later. Sasuke was the last as no one bothered to rouse the unconscious Sakura. He shuffled in with a yawn.

He looked terrible. He had heavy bags under his eyes and nasty bruises all over his neck and shoulders. His skin was stained with his own blood and his lips were frightfully chapped.

"What the hell happened to you?" Anko asked, wiping the sleep from her own eyes.

"Late night training" he grunted out.

Naruto grinned a shark's smile.

"Whatever" Anko huffed grumpily "Coffee now!" she demanded to Tsunami who obliged.

Anko having been pacified tuned everyone else out. Kakashi on the other had was not yet satisfied with his students answer.

"Was it worth it?" he questioned Sasuke.

"Oh so worth it" Sasuke breathed out as he drooled a little.

Kakashi chuckled lightly as Naruto flashed a mega-watt smile full of pride. It seemed that only Kakashi had any inkling of what really happened or what it meant for Sasuke.

"So what's the plan?" Anko asked as she finished her coffee.

"I believe this to be a prime time to impart some wisdom upon my students" Kakashi replied in a sagely tone,

"What about me and Naruto?" she questioned.

"Recon" he retorted.

"So let me get this straight" Anko waved her hands "You are ganna train duck ass and the pink cunt while you send me with the psycho into a shit hole with no clear goal in mind?" she finished with a raised eyebrow.

"Yep" Kakashi eye smiled.

"AH YEEEEEH!" Anko practically giggled as she dashed out the door, dragging Naruto with her.

"Are they ganna be ok?" Tsunami asked with a slight frown.

"Them?" Kakashi asked amused "Most definitely, your town however..." he left his comment to hang.

\/\\/\\/\\/\\/\\/

Naruto sat cross legged in the middle of a dirt road eating a bowl of cereal. Anko had dragged him; bowl and all, to this exact spot before letting him go. She was now flying to and fro taking in all the sights.

"Ya know this place really sucks" Anko huffed as she stopped right in front of him with her arms crossed.

"Well I think it's lovely" Naruto replied curtly.

"What about this is lovely?" she asked with a raised eyebrow as she waved her arm to the surrounding area.

The buildings where all run down and dilapidated. There was trash and debris piled in every corner. The people shuffled to and fro or just sat and wallowed in misery. The final touch was the heavy cloud of despair that hung about the whole place.

"The air for one" Naruto spoke around a mouth full of cereal "It makes the food taste better" Anko just gave him an off look "The atmosphere is quite calming" he continued "And all this suffering means I shall not fear going hungry" Anko just looked at the sky and shook her head before setting off to find some entertainment, leaving Naruto to his own devices.

Naruto closed his eyes and settled into a peaceful stupor as he finished his morning meal. His calm was quickly interrupted as a sword totting thug walked down the road on a collision course with the young avatar.

"A' kid get outa my way" he barked at Naruto.

Naruto didn't move, didn't even open his eyes. He simply waved his hand and a scythe flew from its seal on his arm and cut the bandit off at the shins. He fell to the ground, wailing in agony.

"Anko" Naruto softly called and she appeared swiftly in a puff of smoke.

"What!?" she demanded.

"Take this 'thing' and torture it" he spoke, eyes still closed "I have no need for his pain as that which surrounds us sustains me"

Anko just shook her head again as the meaning to his words yet eluded her. She did however begin to drag the sobbing cripple off. She intended to take great enjoyment from infliction travesties upon him but she just had to smart off to Naruto.

"You know I was just about to get laid asshole" she shot at Naruto.

"No, you were not" Naruto stopped her dead in her tracks "Even if the chance had arisen you would back out of the situation and keep your virginity intact" Anko grew red face.

"And how would you know?" she growled at him.

Naruto opened his uncovered eye and gazed at her apathetically. A small blue flame encompassed his iris.

"Fine whatever" Anko trudged off.

Naruto closed his eye again and sat there undisturbed for the rest of the day.

\/\\/\\/\\/\\/\\/

Anko had dragged her prey into a back alley and was busy at work. She was also deep in though.

"Stupid Naruto" she huffed to herself "It's not like I want to be a virgin"

She was more than a little torn up at his earlier words. As she paid less attention to her victim and more attention to internal contemplation two apparitions appeared on her shoulders.

"Yeah it's not like we haven't tried to get laid" A chibi Anko in a naughty angel costume appeared on her left shoulder.

"The guys were just to pussy to take it" seductive devil Anko sneered from her right.

"I have tried with all the guys willing to fuck me" Anko sighed as she took out a meat clever.

In truth the amount of male shinobi willing to have sex with Orochimaru's former apprentice was tiny. Most were either too blinded by hate or worried she had some lethal mutation from his experiments. Not many were even willing to flirt with her. This of course caused her to crave attention and so sexy Anko was born. Though her lack of clothing did allow for a wide range of movement.

"It's not our fault we get nervous" angel said defensively.

"It's their fault for not expecting the attack" devil retorted.

Anko had so many trust issues that she had a near panic attack every time she got close to doing the deed with someone. This usually ended with her attacking them out of reflex. They would in turn flee and tell all their friends about how bat shit crazy she was further shrinking the pool of people willing to share her bed.

"I don't think there is anyone left in Konoha that will sleep with me" Anko muttered while she took hold of a screw driver.

"How about the newbies?" devil wiggled her eyebrows.

"We might kill them by accident" angel argued.

"Yeah they aint all immortal like Naruto" Anko pointed out, nut cracker in hand.

"Then lets fuck Naruto" devil smiled widely.

"What?" angel demanded.

"He's just a kid" Anko shook her head.

"Hey old enough to kill old enough to get it on" devil accented her words with hip thrusts.

"Well we have seen how... advanced Naruto is in the killing category" angel said as her wings slowly turned black.

"Yeah lets she how good he is in the sack" devil demanded.

"Actually he could be the only one we need" the now fallen angel Anko smirked.

Anko just rolled the thought around her in her head as she used a bone saw on her victim.

"Just think of all the kinky things we could do and we don't have to worry about hurting him" fallen angel tried to sweeten the deal.

"Fuck he will probably enjoy it more the ruffer we are" devil shivered at her own thoughts.

"Yeah" Anko nodded "Yeah you guys are right" Anko agreed and her two chibi versions vanished in black puffs of smoke, giggling perversely as they went.

Anko then focused back to the outside world to see a bloody pile of goo sitting in front of her.

"Aw dammit I got carried away again" she scowled.

She just sighed as she stood and brushed the gore off her. She turned around, heading for the house. A new fixation had been born in her mind and it was Naruto.

AN:

Please review and comment as all CONSTRUCTIVE criticism will be taken under advice.

Here is the second part of your gift. TWO Chapter's at once.