Chapter 4
Simon walked back to the galley, intending to finish his meal.
Kaylee waited until he was in front of his plate before pulling it from in front of him.
"Just clearing' up."
She went to take the plate, Simon took her wrist.
"I wasn't finished."
She stood there, plate in one hand, other on her hip.
"Seemed like you were."
"Except that there was still food on my plate."
"Didn't know you were hungry, way you took of after Xiaofan."
Simon couldn't keep the confusion from his voice, "Why are you angry at me?"
She looked away.
"I'm not angry at you."
"But you won't look to me, talk to me."
"Don't help when I do."
"What doe that mean?"
"You know very well."
"If I did Kaylee, I wouldn't be asking."
"We can talk and talk and talk. Gets us nowhere."
"Where are we going?"
Kaylee sighed, exasperated.
"No where, Simon."
She dumped the plate back on the table and took off for the engine room.
"What…" he called to her back as she walked away.
Xiaofan entered from the cargo bay.
"She saw."
"What did she see?"
"You comforting me."
"But…"
"She cares about you, Simon. Any fool could see it."
He gave her a blank look.
"Except for you."
"You don't mean…"
"Don't be thick, Simon. You know very well how she feels."
"I can't…"
"Why not?"
"There's so much, River, the…"
"Other things," she breathed out slowly, "Simon, there will always be other things. There is never a perfect time. Never."
"We proved that."
"Now he thinks about it."
"I did… Xiaofan, back then…"
"Me too."
"What?"
"I felt that way too. We were just…"
"I got involved with…"
"I was never forward, I let you…"
"And I never…"
"One of us needs to complete a sentence. There, it was me," she smiled. "The fact of the matter is, we never would have worked out then, no matter what we wanted or intended."
"This with River would have happened and I would still be here."
"With Kaylee."
He looked at her.
"It's obvious watching you two. There's a bond. She knows you, she knows your secret. Cares about you despite your inability to go a full conversation without putting your foot deeply in your mouth."
"I don't want anyone to get hurt."
"Be true to what you feel."
"How are you so wise?"
"Not wise, just… I've had much time to think."
Simon looked at her.
"You should probably go talk to her, reassure her."
"I should? Won't she still be… angry?"
"Yes, but you will make it up to her."
"I will…"
He strode off, heading for the engine room and Kaylee.
"Oh, he just makes me so…" Kaylee seethed as she tweaked at Serenity's engines. "I could just…"
"Doctor Love failing to live up to your dreams again?"
Kaylee looked up to see Zoe standing in the doorway to the engine room.
"I ain't got no dreams."
"You love him Kaylee."
"I don't."
Zoe looked sideways at her.
"I care about him."
Another look.
"I…"
"It's complicated?"
"Yes."
"That boy doesn't know how to stay out of his own way."
"He does seem to stick…"
A voice made them turn their heads.
"Kaylee?"
She looked away in irritation.
"Simon."
"Would you please talk to me?"
"Didn't do us no good this last time."
He looked to Zoe, eyes pleading.
"Maybe just one more time, meimei."
"Zo…"
"Just one last try. Everyone deserves another chance."
She looked from Zoe to Simon and waved him into the engine room. Zoe clapped the young doctor on his shoulder as he walked by her.
"Try hard, Doc," she said, and walked away.
"Can we talk somewhere else?"
"Like where, Simon? In the cargo bay? Or is…"
"I don't want to fight, Kaylee. I want to say I'm sorry."
"Sayin' it don't help."
He walked up to her.
"Maybe this will," he said, pulling her in his arms. "I'm sorry Kaylee, for being, well, for being a boob."
Kaylee smiled, happy and shocked all at the same time.
"What? What…"
"I do tend to get in my own way."
She let him go, pushing him back. He was startled.
"Maybe we should talk about it in my bunk."
"Maybe we should," he said, smiling, pulling her back to him.
It was awkward at first. Simon knew intellectually what he was supposed to do. But as he saw it, that was part of the problem. Intellectually, he shouldn't be doing anything.
So, he let instinct take over.
He pulled Kaylee to him, one hand in her hair the other around her waist. Their lips touched, tongues tentatively moving against the other. Kaylee relaxed her body against Simon, her heart beating like a drum in her throat.
She grasped his shoulders, running a hand through the wispy hairs at the back of his neck. His back tightened a bit as she ran the other hand over his pigu. The kiss deepened and he relaxed more in Kaylee's embrace. His mind wandered and her hands traveled his body.
Kaylee could not believe it. She was wrapping her mind around it as it happened. She kept her eyes closed, fearing anything that would interfere with the magic. She touched him, fingers at the collarbone, running down the middle of his chest, caught in the edge of his sweater.
He stood there, his lips still in contact with hers, breathing, touching his lips to hers, feeling her hands as the wandered his body. Then he gasped as he felt fingertips on his stomach. The flat of her hand moving up, pushing the fabric out of her way.
He took breath to speak, but her lips fastened to his once more. A deep kiss, pushing all lucid thought from his mind. And still the sweater was coming off, then the under shirt, just his skin, with the thin fabric of her own between them.
He could feel the peaks of her breasts against the skin over his ribs. And finally his hands found movement.
Simon began kissing Kaylee, the corner of her lips, cheek, jaw. He breathed by her ear and she shivered. Kisses rained lightly as his hands moved from passive to active.
H slipped the t-shirt over her head, exposing her breasts.
"Kaylee," he breathed.
She moaned.
"Open your eyes."
"I can't."
"Now, I know that it's just not true."
She smiled against his cheek.
"I don't want this to fade from in front of me."
"I promise, we are going to zuoai, and I am not going to disappear."
She opened her eyes.
"Make love?"
He kissed her gently, lips just grazing.
"Take me to bed, Simon."
It took a moment, then they were unclothed on Kaylee's bed.
She cupped her hands to his cheeks, passion flaring in her. But she couldn't keep her hands to his face. She wrapped her arms around him, pulling him in tight. She could feel him between her legs, gently, not demanding. Before she knew it there were lips on her neck, lingering kisses on trailing down to her breasts.
He flicked his tongue over her nipples, taking one in his mouth, applying suction until she moaned. His hands gripped her hips, holding her to the bed.
Not that Kaylee had a mind to escape.
She let him play with her a while, until she couldn't control herself anymore. She wanted to feel him. She sat up and when he started to speak, she placed a finger on his lips. She moved him under her, straddling his thighs.
She gave him almost he same treatment. Flowering kisses to his chest, down his belly, lower.
"Kaylee…"
"Shhhh…"
She kissed one hip and then the other, moving to the center, his yangdao moving, reacting to her breath. She didn't touch him, just breathing, the warmth making him hard. She moved further down his body. Each thigh, kneecaps, shins, arch of his feet.
Simon laughed.
"Come here."
He pulled her on top of him, capturing her mouth for another kiss.
Kaylee opened her legs, so she could feel him more readily, the sensation making her tingle. Simon moved, his creating friction with hers. She was breathing heavily.
"I want you, Simon."
He moaned.
"Inside me, Simon. Now."
He didn't think, he just moved. He moved Kaylee on her back, mouth on hers, reaching between them, touching her flower, feeling her wetness. Kaylee gasped and moved with his hand, grinding, little moans deep in her throat.
"Inside."
Simon positioned himself and moved inside her. Kaylee wrapped herself around him, moving with him, keeping their lips joined. They rocked together, gently at first, momentum building.
He slipped his hand down again, to where they joined. He moved his finger over her bud and she cried out. His lips moved over her cheek to her ears. He breathed words, maybe they were words, into her ears as they moved together.
Kaylee's nails dragged, not painfully, across his back. It just urged him, made him move, increased the pressure of his caress, the power of his thrust. Very soon he had no conscious mind, he had the feeling of Kaylee's body around him, enveloping him, making him gasp with the sheer pleasure of it. Soon…
She felt the same, even when he removed that bit of stimulation. Just the stroke, it sent a surge through her. Soon…
Touch, kiss, lips, tongue, finger, movement, ah, movement, and they were together, crying out, mutual release found.
He lay on top of her a moment, their breathing becoming more normal, then he moved to her side. His backside cold against the bulkhead, he shivered.
"My love," she said.
"Yes," he replied.
"Put the other blanket behind your back or you'll freeze."
"Yes, my love."
"I've got it under control, Mal," Wash said, eyes cutting to the captain, still standing over his shoulder, glowering.
"Bits of my ship come flyin' off and you say it's fine?"
"No, I believe I said it was under control."
Mal just glared at the pilot.
From behind them there was a voice.
"Captain?"
Wash and Mal both turned. Xiaofan was standing in the entryway to the bridge.
"May I speak with you?"
Mal looked out to the black, took a deep breath and replied.
"Yep, Doctor Lo."
They were in the corridor by crew quarters when she finally spoke.
"I've received an offer as private physician."
"I suppose you'll be taking your leave."
She stared at the bulkhead.
"Yes."
"Care to tell me where we'll be droppin' you off?"
Xiaofan pulled her thoughts together.
"Bellerophon."
"Can't say as I'll be happy to head back that way, but if it's your direction, then we'll be goin'. Right after this drop."
"Of course, Captain."
"If that's all," Mal said, itching to be elsewhere. Anywhere else than with this woman who reminded him too clearly off someone he was trying to forget.
She looked at him, his unease giving way to full irritation.
"That's all. Thank you, Captain."
"Wasn't nothin', Doctor Lo."
