Chapter 4
A/N: Quick shout-out to xXJustaWriterxX, nicsav, and Iniysa for following the story. You guys rock!
My body was thrashing against Ridley as she drug me down the hallway. I wasn't able to form any words. Sobs racked my body as I twisted out of her grasp. Ethan, Ethan, Ethan. Lightning crashed outside and rain began to pour in Ravenwood manor. I gripped my hair and screamed in agony. The pain in my chest was excruciating. My heart was shattering. I fell to the floor and curled up. All the while screaming and sobbing. What have I done? Ethan is going to die and it's my fault. I'm no better than any dark caster out there. I am a tyrant. I gripped my chest as my body began to shake.
"Lena, you've got to calm down." Ridley whispered above me. The rain was pouring at a fast pace and lightning bolts flashed across the ceiling. I tried to breath but I couldn't. My throat had closed and I felt like I was choking on my pain. Ridley rested her hand on my shoulder and I slapped it away quickly. The fireplace surged to life, sending sparks of yellow and orange across the floor.. The rain began to pour so much that I couldn't make out Ridley even though she was in front of me.
"Ethan, Ethan, Ethan." I chanted as I shook. His name sent quick, horrid flashes of pain through my chest. I screamed and gripped my chest again. I heard footsteps on the stairs and looked up. Uncle Macon was standing at the base looking at me. He looked tired and scared. He glanced at me and I saw a flash of pain go through his eyes. I knew before he even spoke.
"Ethan!" Pain shot through my whole body now. Darkness flooded my vision and I was gone.
"Lena, Lena, Lena." A voice sung softly. I cracked my eyes open and Sarafine was standing above me.
"I told you would go dark." She hissed and I saw Ethan standing behind her. His eyes were pure white and his arms and head were limp. I tried to speak but all that came out was a small croak. Ethan stumbled towards me. I could see the bright red patches in the shape of my hands.
"You killed me. It's all your fault. You're worthless." Ethan said before disappearing into a puff of black dust. I reached my arm towards where he was, weakly. I mouthed his name and tears streamed down my face. Sarafine grabbed my arm and tossed me into the wall.
"You killed me. So you could be light. Look where that left you. You're a murderer! Just like me."
Screams rang through the house. I jolted up and found myself on the couch. The screams stopped suddenly. Was that me? I looked around the house. Furniture was scattered across the floor and several pieces were smashed to bits. The curtains and rugs were charred and laying limply across the floor. Black patches of soot covered the walls. My brain pounded against my skull. I sat up and pain shot through my body. Ethan! I jumped up, ignoring the pain that shot through my body with each step, and began to walk upstairs. I climbed the stairs slowly. Did I really want to see him? To see his lifeless body? The beautiful spark of life drained from his eyes? Tears streamed down my face as I walked down the hallway. I stopped in front of my bedroom door. My hand hovered over the handle. I felt cold and horrible. My hand fell onto the handle.
"He's not in there." Tears began to flow freely. Of course, they wouldn't have left him in there. The horrid room where his death took place. My hand dropped from the handle and I turned slowly. Uncle Macon was standing behind me. He was dressed in a black suit. His cane was propped against the wall beside him
"Where is he?" I croaked out. My voice didn't sound right. I sounded hoarse and lifeless.
"He's in the guest bedroom. Lena, he's alive." Alive. That was the one, and only, word I wanted to hear. I turned on my heel and sprinted down the hallway. I threw open the guest bedroom door and stopped in my tracks. Ethan was sprawled on the bed. He was sleeping in some of Uncle Macons old clothes. His arms were covered in yellow and purple bruises. His face and neck were bright red with charred flesh surrounding the worst of it. His hair was disheveled, as is he had been trying to rip it out. I fell onto my knees as I looked at him. He looked horrible. How could I have done this? I barely touched him. Tears streamed down my cheeks and I gripped my chest again. The pain was back but it was worse than before. If I had killed him at least he wouldn't be in pain.
"Lena." I lifted me head and Ethan's eyes were slightly open. His brown eyes were as gorgeous as ever. But, I could see the pain in his expression. His voiced sounded worse than mine. As if he had just come out of house fire and his lungs had consumed too much soot and smoke. His lips pulled up into a smile. His lips were horribly chapped. I could see the pain it caused him to smile. Pain I inflicted on him. Another series of pain shot through my chest. Ethan tried to push himself up. He whimpered and fell back against the bed.
"It would be best for you to stay put." Uncle Macon walked into the room and settled Ethan back onto the bed. Ethan nodded lightly and winced. The burn on his neck cracked open and blood oozed out. It ran down his neck and soaked his shirt. Ethan whimpered again and I could see tears forming in his eyes. I wanted to help him. To heal him. But I couldn't move. I couldn't speak. I could just watch as Ethan groaned and cried.
"Lena." Ethan chocked out and his hand reached towards me. His eyes were pleading. Pleading me to help him. I shook my head and tears flowed fasted down my cheeks.
"I can't touch you." I whispered before standing and running. I ran out the front door and down the gravel path. I ran until my lungs felt like they were going to explode. I collapsed as sobs raced through me again. Why? Why did this have to happen? Why couldn't I just love him? Images of Ethan laying in that bed raced though my mind. Rain began to fall in time with my tears.
Lena. Come back.
Ethan's voice poured into my mind. He sounded right and perfect in my mind. He still wanted me near him. Pain ripped through my body. Tearing at my heart until I was left with nothing. Nothing but the pain and the shreds of my heart.
"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I'm sorry." I chanted my apologies until my voice gave out and I was left lying in the rain, sobbing. Ethan, why do you love me? Why do you still want me? I don't deserve your love. I never have and I never will. I deserve to be dead. Right along my mother and Abraham. I deserve to be in pain. I deserve to burn.
A/N: Depressing chapter to write :( but I will be bringing in some more characters next chapter. Who do you think its gonna be?
