A/N: Sorry for taking long on the update. I think I'm only going to find time to update on the weekends, so expect to see a new chapter every week of so, maybe less than that if I find the time. Thank you to all my reviewers and readers. If you haven't' reviewed, please do because seeing reviews makes me want to write even more. Anyways, here's chapter 4!

DevilJolie: Thanks for the review! You will learn of Sam's secret later in the story. For now you're going to have to stick to guessing. Making Jason jealous seems very enticing. Yes, Elizabeth is not going to be available forever and Jason needs to be made aware of that.

Virgy15: Thanks for the review! The irony is I discovered the band Red from a fan made Liason video on YouTube. Ever since then I've been hooked. Start Again is one of my favorite songs and the chapter named after it will be very special. Chapter 3 was the catalyst for the demise of Jasam's marriage and its only going to be downhill from there.

Gabby1: Thanks for the review! Elizabeth does have a big heart. To lose all the people that she has and to still comfort others before herself takes a very strong woman. Carly did pick up on the Liason sparks in the hospital room and will continue to pick up on them because wherever Jason is concerned, Carly will soon be followed. The Drake family is going to continually have Elizabeth's support in the upcoming chapters.

samymammy: Thanks for the review! I am also a Liason fan, but if I can't have them, I would prefer Elizabeth with Matt, even though he comes with the package deal of Maxie. Ewen just seems too suspicious and Lucky is gone so… Yes, why should Jason be the only one getting some?

lrobinson01: Thanks for the review! Yes, something is wrong with the baby, but that won't be revealed for a few chapters. Liason had a great friendship before they ever became romantically involved with one another. I don't understand why they can't get that back in the show. Patrick with a tiara on would make me laugh!

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters, just the storyline.


"Love that we can not have is the one that lasts the longest, hurts the deepest and feels the strongest."


Chapter 4

Breath Into Me

"I should go."

"Why?"

"I have to go help out with Robin's funeral."

He looked into her beautiful blue eyes and watched as she got up from her bed to leave.

"I wish I could go."

"I know."

She gave him a sympathetic smile, knowing that his presence at his best friend's funeral would make Patrick's situation even worse.

"How am I doing?"

Elizabeth turned back to look at the man she once loved, broken and beside himself.

"What do you mean?"

"I just found out my best friend is dead. My wife is hiding something from me. And it's the anniversary of our son's death."

"I'd say you're doing as well as anyone can expect you to in these circumstances."

Jason nodded his head as he watched Elizabeth leave his room. Elizabeth closed the door and leaned against it, knowing how much strength it took to face him. She took the elevator downstairs and picked up her boys, hoping for a good nights sleep after knowing what the next day would be.

Elizabeth woke up and went through the motions of the morning. Taking a shower. Getting dressed. Waking up her sons. Making them breakfast. It was like an ordinary morning in the Webber household, but it was far from ordinary. Today was the day Elizabeth would say goodbye to one of her closest friends.

She knocked on the Drake's door to find Matt behind it. She gave him a friendly hug as he closed the door behind her.

"How did it go last night?"

He helped her out of her black jacket.

"Well, Emma didn't get much sleep."

"Was she asking for Robin?"

"Yeah."

Elizabeth gave him a small smile as she turned around to see a pajama clad Emma run out from her room with her two koalas.

Elizabeth was surprised at first to see how friendly Emma has been to her, but then realized that Emma doesn't really have a female figure in her life anymore, well besides Anna, and now Elizabeth is starting to fill in that role.

"Hi baby girl. Did you have breakfast this morning?"

Emma nodded her head as she sat down next to Elizabeth on the couch.

"We made chocolate chip pancakes."

"Mommy's favorite."

Elizabeth smiled as she held the little girl in her arms.

"Cameron's too. Hey I heard your grandmother bought the most beautiful dress. Do you wanna go put it on for me?"

Emma slowly shook her head no.

"Why not?"

"I don't wanna say goodbye to Mommy."

Elizabeth could already feel the tears coming on, but she had to stay strong in front of Emma and Matt.

"I know baby. None of us do."

"Do you remember when your Daddy and I talked about heaven?"

Matt watched as his niece nodded her head.

"Daddy said Mommy's there."

"That's right she is. She has to stay there because she has a very very important job to do. Do you know what a guardian angel is?"

"It means Mommy is going to be watching over you and Daddy and making sure that you're both happy."

"Mommy can see me?"

Elizabeth smiled at the little girl's surprised tone.

"Yeah."

"Yeah you bet. You think she's going to miss that dance recital you have coming up? No way! She's going to have the best seat, in heaven watching you do all those pirouettes. Those things you showed me. How did that go? It was kinda like...wait...like this?"

Elizabeth and Emma laughed on the couch as Matt tried to imitate a ballerina.

"Oh no, he's not going to do it, is he?"

Matt was happy at the fact that he was getting the two of them to laugh, there wasn't much of that happening around here.

"That was good right?"

"So Emma, before Momma can start her new job we need to say goodbye and wish her luck. That's why were going to the church today, okay?"

"Okay"

"Okay. Go put your koalas away and start getting dressed and I'll be there in a minute, okay?"

Emma nodded her head as she took off for her room. Elizabeth smiled as she stood up to face Matt.

"That's a nice touch, the pirouette."

"Yeah."

"At least it made her smile."

"Yeah, under her instructions. I just wish it was easy to get my brother to smile."

Elizabeth touched his forearm in comfort as she watched the younger Drake brother battle his pain for his hurting brother.


Jason silently watched as his wife walked into his room.

And this is how it feels when I ignore the words you spoke to me
And this is where I lose myself when I keep running away from you

"What are you doing here?"

"What do you mean?"

"Why aren't you at Robin's funeral?"

Sam gave him a puzzling look as she sat down on his bed.

And this is who I am when, when I don't know myself anymore
And this is what I choose when it's all left up to me

"Because you're stuck in the hospital until Patrick can sign your release."

"Well, Patrick's go enough on his mind right now and it's certainly not me."

"Okay, so you wait a few more days in the hospital. It couldn't hurt."

Obviously you don't know me well enough to know that I hate hospitals.

Jason couldn't help that the thought crossed his mind, but he had enough self control not to say it out loud.

"I want you to go."

"Jason, I wasn't really friends with Ro-"

"Sam, can you please just do this for me? I can't be there, and if you're there, at least I know one of us is doing something productive."

Sam knew she wasn't going to win this battle as she huffed off in annoyance. Jason sighed as he went back to his gun magazine, knowing that probably wasn't the best way to have handled their situation.


"Emma's almost ready. She got distracted by her toys and I'm letting her play because she's going to be sitting long enough."

Elizabeth sat back down next to Matt on the couch.

"You know what; we should probably get going because were supposed to be meeting everyone there, right?"

Breathe your life into me
I can feel you

Elizabeth sighed as she tried to think of everyone that was attending Robin's funeral.

"Have you spoken with Maxie?"

"Not since the hospital."

I'm falling, falling faster
Breathe your life into me

Matt tried to look away from Elizabeth so she wouldn't have to see his pain, but knowing Elizabeth, she was there to comfort him. She placed a delicate hand on his knee to make him face her.

I still need you
I'm falling, falling

"Matt, I didn't mean to make her upset. I just wanted her to know how much Robin loved her."

Breathe into me
Breathe into me

Matt shook his head. He couldn't believe Elizabeth thought she was to blame for Maxie's state.

"It wasn't you, she's devastated. There's nothing anybody can say to her right now."

"Yeah, after Jake died everyone was so well-meaning and trying to find the right words and...really it just reminded..."

Matt watched as Elizabeth looked away from him. He was surprised that she brought up Jake. She usually didn't in front of him.

"How long has it been?"

He watched as she dabbed at her moist eyes.

"A year. A whole year tomorrow."

"Wow."

"So much has changed. You know Lucky's left town, Jason's having a new baby...I miss Jake everyday and now Robin's gone?"

"Which is exactly why we have to focus on all the good Robin did."

"Yeah she saved Jason's life."

"Yeah, how's he doing?"

"He's expected to make a full recovery. He's not coming to Robin's funeral."

"So it's probably best he's not going...because this day is going to be hard enough on Patrick as it is."


Jason looked down from his magazine to see a depressed Sonny standing in his doorway. Jason put his magazine down and started to think of how he was going to apologize.

"Look, I'm so-"

Sonny shook his head and waved his hand. Jason watched as the usually strong Sonny struggled to get to his chair beside Jason.

"What's wrong?"

"I'm on my way to Robin's funeral."

The way he struggled to say her name made Jason feel like shit. It was his fault she was dead.

And this is how it looks when I am standing on the edge
And this is how I break apart when I finally hit the ground

"I wish I could be there."

"So do I."

"I miss her already."

"Me too. This is going to be a tough day for everyone."

"So, uh, when can you leave?"

"Just waiting on Patrick to sign my release."

"And he's not here because he's at-"

"Robin's funeral so I'm going to be stuck here for awhile."

Sonny nodded his head. They sat in silence for about a minute. There was nothing to be said between the old friends.

"You better go."

"Yeah."

Jason watched as Sonny stood up to leave.

"Do you think you could say something to her for me? You know tell her I'll be there as soon as I can?"

Sonny slowly turned around and Jason watched as the tears were flowing down the proud Cuban's face.

And this is how it hurts when I pretend I don't feel any pain
And this is how I disappear when I throw myself away

"Yeah, I can do that."

"I appreciate it."

"I'll come by after it's over."

"Alright, take care."

"You too."


"Daddy!"

Matt and Elizabeth looked up from Emma's drawing to see Patrick walk into the room. They watched as he struggled to pick up his daughter.

"Hi sweetheart. Oh my gosh you look beautiful!"

Patrick sat down on the chair as he held his daughter in his lap.

"Are we going to say goodbye to Mommy now?"

Patrick took a heavy breath and looked back down to his beautiful daughter to see Robin staring back at him.

"Yeah, we gonna go say goodbye to Mommy. Give me a hug."

Elizabeth stood up to see that Patrick was barely holding it together in front of his daughter.

"C'mon little miss, lets go put your shoes on."

Patrick watched as everyone filed into the church and took their seats. He held his daughter close to him and with his other hand held Elizabeth's hand. He could feel his brother's strong hand on his shoulder. He watched as the minister began the service.

He stared at the casket. He couldn't believe his wife was in there. He looked back up at the minister to listen to his words, but it felt like he was far away and every sound was muffled.

He watched as Mac stood up to say his piece about Robin. Every sentence brought Patrick to tears as he watched the police commissioner struggle. He watched as Elizabeth stood up to talk about her best friend.

"Robin was a good friend. She was the best mommy I ever knew. She was so full of compassion and she was fair. She always wanted to be fair."

Elizabeth smiled at Emma as she continued.

"It didn't mean she was perfect. We all know how stubborn she could be, but she was stubborn for a reason."

She looked to Patrick to see his reaction, but he showed none. She took another breath as she continued.

"She fought hard for what she believed in and she fought hard for the people she loved."

Elizabeth looked to the picture of Robin on the TV screen.

"A few months ago, when she thought she might not be here for Emma, she asked if I would step in for her. Well I knew then what I know now...Robin is irreplaceable."

She took another breath, said a silent prayer for Robin, and slowly walked back to her seat next to Emma. She felt a soft hand on her shoulder, and she turned around to see Lulu quietly crying and Matt offering one of his grins, but it wasn't full of laughter and hope that it usually contained.

The funeral draws to a close. Everyone says their goodbyes as Robin's casket is carried off to be cremated. Patrick is the last on in the church. Elizabeth turned around to see that he was still kneeling in front of the altar. She looks down at Emma, who was holding her hand.

"Why don't you wait outside with your Uncle Matt while I get your Daddy?"

Emma nodded her head and grabbed her uncle's outstretched. Matt looked at Elizabeth to see if she needed help, but she shook her head.

She walked up the aisle and kneeled down beside Patrick. She didn't say anything. She didn't know what to say. She understood the loss of a child, but she never had to experience the loss of a spouse.

They stayed that way for an hour until Patrick finally moved a hand to his face to wipe away and stood up. He helped Elizabeth up and took her hand as they walked out of the church together.

They stood by as Robin's headstone was put into the ground, hand in hand.


A week had passed. Some could say things changed. The hospital was much quieter. The staff moved a bit slower than usual. There were hardly any smiles. Robin's death took a toll on everyone because she was friendly with all of her coworkers.

Patrick had returned to work just to sign Jason's release. He then resigned and decided to stay at home to help raise Emma.

The first stop Jason made was the cemetery. He silently walked between the graves, searching for her headstone. He had told Sam he had to do this alone. She had argued, but he had won the battle yet again. It seemed that all they did was fight anymore.

He stopped when he finally reached her headstone. He didn't want to believe she was dead, that she was gone forever.

He stood in silence for ten minutes, working up the courage to talk.

"I know I'm a week late, I'm sorry."

He wiped away at the tears on his cheeks.

"I'm so sorry Robin. I'm sorry I wasn't there to protect you. I'm sorry Emma has to grow up without her mother. I'm sorry Patrick has to go through this unbearable pain. I'm sorry…so sorry about everything. I'm just sorry I wasn't there."

Jason fell to his knees in pain. He looked at the writing on her headstone.

Here lies Robin Scorpio Drake
Beloved Mother, Daughter, and Friend

He kept staring at her name, words escaping him. He was so lost in his pain that he hadn't noticed someone walk up behind him. He turned his head in surprise, but the way they kept meeting, it shouldn't be a surprise anymore. She was always there when he needed her the most.

Breathe your life into me
I can feel you

"I didn't mean to interrupt. I just meant to drop these off."

She motioned to the sunflowers in her hand.

I'm falling, falling faster
Breathe your life into me

"Sunflowers?"

Elizabeth smiled as Jason stood up and wiped at his face.

"Yeah, Robin always reminded me of the sun. She was always so warm and radiant."

"That was Robin."

He turned to face her, tears already in her eyes.

I still need you
I'm falling, falling

"I heard about the service and what you said."

Breathe into me
Breathe into me

"Yeah, it felt like déjà vu all over again. It's been almost five years since Emily's death, yet I can still remember exactly what I said at her service like it was yesterday. Everything was the same, well…almost everything."

Breathe into me
Breathe into me

"What do you mean?"

Breathe your life into me
I can feel you

She looked away and didn't continue until he took one of her small hands in his. She looked at him in alarm, and then saw the calming look he gave her.

I'm falling, falling faster
Breathe your life into me

"You weren't there."

A single tear fell down his face.

I still need you
I'm falling, falling
Breathe into me

"I would have given anything to be there, but it didn't seem right."

"It wasn't, but that doesn't mean I was hoping that you be at the back of the church, giving me the strength to continue."

Breathe your life into me!
I'm falling, falling faster

Jason nodded as he let go of her hand and looked back at the headstone.

"It all feels like a dream."

Breathe your life into me!
falling, falling, falling

"More like a nightmare."

Elizabeth nodded at his statement, knowing that life at the moment was basically a nightmare.

"How's Emma?"

"I don't think she really understands that her mommy isn't coming back. She's been sleeping over at my house a couple times this week to give Patrick some time alone. On the bright side she gets along with Cameron."

"That's good. She's going to need good friends in the future and I don't think anyone would be better than Cameron."

"You mean that?"

Jason nodded his head as he moved closer to Elizabeth.

"Of course I do. You're his mother, Elizabeth, and from the time I've spent with him, I can already tell that he's going to grow up to be a good man, thanks to you."

"That means a lot."

Jason nodded his head again.

"It still hurts, doesn't it?"

"It's only been a year. I don't think that pain's ever going to go away."

Breathe into me
Breathe into me

"Is it bad that I keep expecting him to come running through the front door and into my arms?"

"No, I think you're always going to expect that because Jake died so young. He didn't get a chance to live his life and it wasn't anyone's fault. Bad things happen to good people all the time. There's no explanation for it."

Jason wrapped an arm around Elizabeth's shoulder as she quietly wept for their deceased son.

Breathe into me
Breathe into me


A/N: Hopefully everyone enjoyed the chapter. This story is rather depressing and it's probably going to be depressing for a few more chapters. Lyrics were 'Breathe Into Me' by Red. Rumors have been going around that Liason will finally have a heartfelt conversation about Jake from this Tuesday to Wednesday, and it takes place on the bridge. That's gotta mean something, right? Anyways, let me know what you think in a review and what you would like to see happen. Until next time!