4. Failed
Skipper floated in the water, down the sewer. It took a while until he regained consciousness again. When he woke up, he quickly tried to get out of the water, but every move brought him almost unbrearable pain. On a lower edge of the river, he managed to grab hold and pulled himself out of the water. Skipper coughed and spit out the water he´d swallowed.
But he collapsed on his belly again, heavily breathing. Now that he was awake again he felt the pain even more. "God, h-how could this happen?" he asked himself and groaned in pain. His belly felt like a ball of throbbing pain and his flippers felt like every single bone was broken. Skipper had trouble breathing from his probably broken ribs in his chest.
The penguin shivered and let out a shout of pain, which echoed from the wall. The leader remained lying there in the sewer until he collected enough strengh for getting up. Slowly he pulled himself up and supported his beaten body on the wall. The penguins vision was still blurry and dizzyness took over his brain. Skipper felt his bloodshot eyes released some tears and he pressed his wing on his belly, grasping it in pain. Step by step he made his way home, but through all the pain it took about three hours of stumbling, collapsing and getting up again.
Skippers stomach hurt so badly, so he even had to throw up two times on his way back to the zoo. It was already 2300 hours when he arrived at the HQ, good for him, because no one noticed him returning. The last thing he needed now, was any comforting or worried action from his neighbours. "I will stand through this alone" Skipper gasped as he tried climbing down the ladder, but he fell down the last couple of stairs and landed on his aching back.
A loud scream of pain escaped his beak and writhred his body from the stinging pain. Skipper wanted to go to the bathroom, where a first aid kit laid, but he didn´t have the strengh for getting up anymore. The leader pushed his torso up with his flippers, but he failed and fell down again. "Damn!" Skipper gasped and crawled on his belly to get forward. Every move made him gasp or yell in pain.
At least his energy lasted long enough to drag himself into the bathroom where he pulled himself up on the sink. A look into the mirrow made his heart wrench. A face, bruised, covered with blood and with bloodshot eyes, stared back at him. "I´ve failed, I can´t believe it. I never fail..." Skipper whispered to himself and lowered his head in shame. He couldn´t even look into his own eyes anymore.
Skipper tightened his grasp on the edges of the sink and and let out an angry scream, which was followed by some loud gasps. When he opened his eyes, he looked down on his body. His once white feathers where drenched in blood and dirty. Quickly he closed his eyes again, because he couldn´t bear the shame of seeing his own beaten body.
But now he had to take care of all his injuries but the leader didn´t even know where to start. He fetched the first aid box from the shelf and opened it quickly. Skipper took a white cloth and dabbed the bleeding wounds on his chest and belly with it. Unfortunately this caused more burning pain and he had to stop from right after he´d started. Slowly he began examinating himself, with trembling flippers he palpated his chest and winced at almost every touch.
Skipper felt some ribs where broken and his heart painfully beating against them. He clenched his eyes and let his flipper slide down to his stomach, which was still filled with throbbing pain. "It´s no use, it´s the best I lie down" Skipper gasped and looked at a small white bottle, where he kept some painkillers. The leader took it with trembling, almost numb feeling flippers and opened the lid of it. He felt the pain increasing and swallowed three pills, one after another.
Slowly Skipper limped back to his bunk. Exhausted he laid down and curled himself up under a warm, soft blanket, which he usually never used, but he froze so much suddenly and he hoped that warmth and the pills would ease his pain a little at least. But he kept suffering, emotionally and physically. He tried to turn on his side, but he felt his bones in his flipper and shoulder crunching. A new wave of pain, flashed through his body and Skipper bit into his pillow to supress another scream of agony.
The leader had never felt so miserable in his life before. After the effect of the painkillers finally kicked in, he rested his head on the pillow and closed his eyes. But he was still in too much pain to fall asleep. Wearly he began rubbing his chest and belly, trying to relieve some pain of his sore muscles by a gentle massage. Well, it worked a little after a long time and Skipper fell asleep in the early morning hours.
But even in his sleep, he couldn´t find rest. Skipper saw the rat king and his brother laughing and pointing their fingers at him, which made his emotional condition even worse. The leader felt a stinging pain in his chest, everytime he heard a laugher. Although he was supposed to stay strong, he just wanted to cry. Skipper buried his head under his flippers and let out a few sobbs, hoping that no one would hear him.
The scene in his dream changed and he was alone in a dark room, but he still heard the laughing rats and even other voices, which sounded very familiar to him. Now he couldn´t hold himself back anymore and Skipper cried into his wings. The leader had never felt so lonely before. But he didn´t dare to think of his former friends, because he knew, that even a sinlge thought for them, would be unbearable for him now. Slowly he realized, that he made a huge mistake.
