Sunday 19 July 2015, probably about 12.45 by the time I post, UK time.
AN: I'm so, so sorry I haven't updated for ages! Updates should be coming quicker now I'm on holiday, but... read the end AN please. Anyway, thanks so much to Iris Stardust, SuperMegaFoxyAwesomeHot2001, AsgardGuardian, Petethehotdog and Guest for your reviews, they really helped when I wrote this :) Sorry if it's a little meh though... anyway:
1) What is Gilderoy Lockhart's favourite colour?
I will say this for him, he has picked a good favourite colour...
Lilac
2) What is Gilderoy Lockhart's secret ambition?
Ah, maybe I didn't quite read that deeply... yes, I'm certain he has the same ambition as me, I mean... he's famous, and I should be too some day...
His secrets ambition is for Rumbleroar the lion who talks to let him ride on his back.
3) What, in your opinion, is Gilderoy Lockhart's greatest achievement to date?
Oh... of course, there are a lot to choose from! Unfortunately, I don't waste my time with his achievements... there was one, I believe...
The time he saved himself and a hotel from being eaten by a lethifold in hiding.
4) When is Gilderoy Lockhart planning on retiring?
Oh, I read this. He would be good to have on our side. He seems to be very enthusiastic, which I like. Shame he's devoted to STOPPING the dark forces... still, my Father will hear about this question, maybe it's a hidden message...
Never, until all evil is gone from the world.
5) How many times has Gilderoy Lockhart won Witch Weekly's Most Charming Smile Award?
Duh... he literally just said that... "Me..." ya da da da... "5 times winner of witch weekly's most charming smile award... but I didn't get rid of the bandon banshee by smiling at her!" Still, I was talking to Wayne, and apparently he said the same thing when the Puffs and Gryffindors had their lesson. Ha, he probably memorised a speech!
5
6) In his book 'Break with a Banshee' how did Gilderoy Lockhart bravely banish the bandon banshee?
Not by smiling at her. Should I put that down? No, I get it, he thought no one would put it down because he wanted to test us! I should have been a Ravenclaw! But, I shouldn't have cause I'm a Slytherin!
He smiled at her.
7) What is Gilderoy Lockhart's best side for photos?
Best side? For photos? Oh, well, Potter was handing out signed photos... and Draco, that was completely irrelevant so... he was standing on the side... err...
Left
8) Has Gilderoy Lockhart ever won the Dunstable Duelling Championship for Wizards, or just been pipped at the post?
Yes, I'm sure he's won it! This is getting slightly annoying now... how many questions are there? 54?! What the actual... this is ridiculous...
He has won.
9) What product does Gilderoy Lockhart use to clean his teeth with, to achieve his famous dazzling white smile?
Err... famous? That's painfully true, Mother showed me an article about his teeth... I think he used some type of bleach thing like some people say I use on my hair which I don't.
Bleach
10) What is the person name Gilderoy Lockhart has given to his broomstick?
Well, I'm sure it's something to do with his secret ambition, so...
Mars
11) Why is Gilderoy Lockhart always crowded round whenever he goes on his foreign travels?
Well, why is he famous? The same reason, duh!
He writes books.
12) What is Gilderoy Lockhart's wand wood?
His wand wood is... I should've studied wandlore, shouldn't I? Well, my father will hear about this when I tell him about how I've failed in an old historic tradition! Wait, didn't he say it was a waste of time... on no circumstances am I answering this!
13) What position did Gilderoy Lockhart play in the Hogwarts Quidditch Team?
He played Quidditch? You learn something new every day. I guess... he was probably a keeper, most likely for him.
Keeper
14) How many times has Gilderoy Lockhart been proposed to as of 1991 in his latest book?
... and this is related to DADA, totally! What even is his latest book? I thought we were supposed to look for the actual lesson, not the stuff about him...
87
15) What is Gilderoy Lockhart's favourite quote and who is it by?
I know only of the quotes... how about... err... Celestina Warbeck, Mother loves her and I'm sure he does too! So, what's her cheesiest quote?
'If you mix fire with passion and sparks on the side, devotion comes out and true love adheres, to the person and lover, but if wrong- beware, look out for a life of great sorrow and tears'
By Celestina Warbeck
16) How did Gilderoy Lockhart stop the Sirens enchanting him and the sailors in Sydney, 1988?
Don't sirens enchant you with their voice? Yeah, so he probably- hopefully- was logical.
He moved away from them.
17) What house was Gilderoy Lockhart in at Hogwarts?
Eurgh, Crabbe is still on question 5, he just picked up his paper and flashed it at me... good thing we aren't in Transfiguration or something or he'd have gotten himself detention... imagine! I wonder how it must feel to have a brain as backwards as his... honestly, he literally answered that question in his beginning speech! How ridiculous... oh! I know this, of course, every true wizard knows about famous authors and their houses... Father and Mother always made sure I knew all the important stuff.
Ravenclaw
18) In Gilderoy Lockhart's fifth year at Hogwarts, how many Valentine's Day cards did he get sent?
... that is so old class who sends card for Valentine's day?! The idea...
71
19) What is Gilderoy Lockhart's full name?
Again, I was taught the important stuff! Wait... by full, it only means first, middle and last, right?
Gilderoy Enrique Lockhart
20) What is Gilderoy Lockhart's favourite subject?
Duh, you know, I'm beginning to wonder what I'm doing. This is kinda a stupid test... no wonder Granger's doing it... well, what does he teach?!
Defence Against the Dark Arts
21) What is Gilderoy Lockhart's perfume brand called?
He has a perfume brand? Wow, why do I not have one if that person does?! This is an injustice! My father will hear about this...
Perfumania
22) What is Gilderoy Lockhart's best subject?
Same as question 20, what is this?!
DADA
23) What is Gilderoy Lockhart's worst subject?
You know, I'm beginning to think this isn't a worthwhile quiz, it hasn't helped me at all!
Potions
24) How did Gilderoy Lockhart's parents (particularly mother) know that he was superior to his older sisters?
He is? Well his sisters have to be pretty bad for that to happen...
His sisters were mean
25) Write 3 problems Gilderoy Lockhart faced at school.
Eurgh, I bet he's a Mudblood lover or something... and he probably also has some tragic backstory because every hero... eurgh, Potter... has one. And what does... erugh, honestly, forget it!
1- he was teased because of what he believed
2- he had a tragic life
3- he always got dumped by girls
26) How many famous people are famous because of Gilderoy Lockhart?
Oh, people are famous because of him? Mother and Father never mentioned this... well it can't be too many then.
19
27) Name three of those people.
Oh dear, I know how to apparently name them! What a tragedy... well, who are some famous people who Mother likes- well, her favourite singers are... err... oh yes, them.
Celestina Warbeck, Melena Pine, Adam Pollo
28) How many older sisters does Gilderoy Lockhart have?
I bet it's something stupid like the Weasley family... maybe he has 6 sisters... but we would've heard about his siblings, and... hmmm...
4
29) Approximately how many love letters does Gilderoy Lockhart receive per week?
Okay, honestly. What. Am. I. Doing? Why would I need to know how many letters someone ELSE gets?
91
30) What is Gilderoy Lockhart's favourite sweet/chocolate?
Oh, I'm sure he likes those sweets that floss your teeth for you! Father says they're good for you.
Tooth flossing mints
31) What relation is Gilderoy Lockhart to the famous Muggle playwright, William Shakespeare?
Muggles! And tell me, why would I care about that? I mean, he obviously didn't change the world that much, or Mother and Father would've mentioned him... right? So he can't be that famous...
Second cousin
32) What is Gilderoy Lockhart's favourite book?
He seems like quite a... well, he's a Ravenclaw, he probably likes educational booms and stuff...
The Standard Book of Spells Grade 7
33) What colour ink does Gilderoy Lockhart normally write with?
Duh, he's writing in orange in that portrait.
Orange
34) What is Gilderoy Lockhart's favourite drink?
You know, my father is going to hear about this, this is an outrage! We are paying good money to buy these schoolbooks! NOT that it matters, but this place is really going to the dogs! How is this getting a good education!?
Water
35) In your opinion, is Gilderoy Lockhart's work good?
Well, I can't deny he has a good writing style, Father always says to appreciate the good- not that type of good, but good as in well written and such.
Yes.
36) Which element on the periodic table is named after Gilderoy Lockhart?
What in Hogwarts is the periodic table? Like, a timetable or something? So that would mean lesson, so which lesson is named after him? Duh!
Defence Against the Dark Arts
37) What was Gilderoy Lockhart's first word?
Well, it was probably his name- I mean, me, Mother and Father- all our first words were abbreviations of our names...
Roy
38) Name 5 Muggle books Gilderoy Lockhart wrote, but let someone else take credit for?
Ew, Muggles! What is Dumbledore playing at, letting Lockhart ask us these types of question?! Merlin, there's something wrong with life... I refuse to answer, I don't care about Muggles! I. Re. Fuse.
39) Name the 'authors'
Not applicable.
N/A
40) How was Gilderoy Lockhart described by Witch Weekly in the most popular issue of 1990?
Eurgh, this is hideous. How am I supposed to know how he's described, I don't read Witch Weekly now, let alone when I was 10! And not even the month?! That's just mean...
A charming and nice haired man.
41) What is Gilderoy Lockhart's biggest regret?
This is such an annoying quiz, his biggest regret is probably like not saving the world or something, I have better things to be doing with my time!
Not saving everyone
42) Would you consider Gilderoy Lockhart to be a hero and/or one of your inspirational figures? State which.
Wow, this is... interesting. Personally, I wouldn't, no. He is a hero I guess though...
He's a hero.
43) Who is the most famous person you've ever met?
Is he expecting me to say him? Cause I'm not saying that. I guess... err... Albus Dumbledore, fool as he may be. Honestly!
Albus Dumbledore
44) What does Gilderoy Lockhart do when he can't sleep at night?
Err... hopefully what any sane person does... it's what we all do...or he should, if he's worthy to a wizarding name! Every wizarding family has the sprig of lavender... right?
Smells the enchanted lavender
45) Why did Gilderoy Lockhart take up the teaching post at Hogwarts, and why was he reluctant to do so?
Why is obvious, he was offered the position, but why he was reluctant... hmm... probably because he didn't want that absolute disgrace of a wizard to be boss of him...
He was offered the position so he took it but was reluctant because he didn't want a boss.
46) What is Gilderoy Lockhart's biggest fear?
Wow, the world has ended! Everyone queue up, Lockhart's announcing his biggest fear! Surprised he's admitting it though... probably something like failing knowing him...
Not winning witch weekly's most charming smile award ever again
47) What upsets Gilderoy Lockhart the most?
When someone steals his awards probably... this is getting really boring, ew... do I have to finish this?!
When he doesn't win something
48) What happened when someone stole Gilderoy Lockhart's wand and tried to insult him when he was in his third year?
Well, I'm not going to ignore the word 'tried'... so obviously Lockhart stopped him... eurgh, why am I even bothering with this, only nerds like that Granger and Weasley and Potter will bother doing this properly...
He decided to be a good boy and get the teachers
49) How does Gilderoy Lockhart keep his nails in such good condition?
Funnily enough, that's not the first thing I thought of! I dunno, he probably uses some spell or something...? Might as well put it down.
He uses a spell.
50) What did a Professor say to Gilderoy Lockhart before he left in his last year at Hogwarts?
... I don't know, what was it? Probably something along the lines of good luck and then praising him to the heavens... eurgh.
Good Luck, we'll miss you, you're amazing, we all love you.
51) How does Gilderoy Lockhart tame hair?
Aha, trick question! He's going to say it's natural, isn't it? I'm not a Slytherin for nothing, I know when someone asks a trick question!
It's natural hair
52) How is the fan 'Sisley Andrews' eternally indebted to Gilderoy Lockhart?
Wow, she must be pretty important to be mentioned by name- and pathetic, this is a complete and utter waste of time, my father will be utterly ashamed when he finds out about this!
Gilderoy Lockhart saved her
53) What type of shampoo, conditioner and body wash does Gilderoy Lockhart use?
He actually lets us know?! Wow, shock horror! It's at times like this I wish I had a mother who obsesses over Lockhart... but obviously I don't because that's an absurd thing to think and it's so stupid and why would I want a mother like the stupid Weasley woman or the Muggle Granger or Potter's dead Mudblood mother, no, I like my mother and she's one of the only decent ones in the world, geez !Okay... calm down...
He uses pineapple and coconut.
54) When is Gilderoy Lockhart's birthday, and what would his ideal gift be?
Yes, I'm at the end of this stupid test... thank Merlin. But I still have questions... right. Just hurry up and shove something down!
His birthday is the 10 December and his ideal gift would be a quill pen.
11/54- well done Draco on questions 1, 3, 4, 5, 8, 17, 25, 27, 35, 49 and 52! Some of them, such as with question 25, I was lenient- that should have said 'girls ditched him because they couldn't stand the fame' or something similar, as with a lot of the other questions where you should've expanded, but some I just couldn't give you. An admirable effort!
AN: Hey... so I decided to cut the end bit, and I think I'll take Petethehotdog's advice, and do separate chapters and maybe add multiple ones in.
BUT, one thing. So the good news is, I'll hopefully write loads during the holidays and I'm hoping to update tomorrow/later/soon to make up for my disappearance. However, I have personal issues right now, and I'm kinda really worried. Inevitably, it's going to happen, but I don't feel like going into it right now, but I'll tell you when it does happen because I'll probably be off for a few days or something. I'm sorry for the time I've been off, I'm not going to go into excuses :) Anyway, sit back and enjoy the next few chapters that should be coming your way shortly
Kay, comment, follow, favourite, etc pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. Is there anything I can do to improve? :D Kay, I'm gonna retire for the night now :) Byeeeee :D
~ElsaElphieGinny
