AN: Just a little warning that you might to hide all sharp implements after reading this chapter! Don't worry - it's not as bad as it may appear and will all become clear later. You might want to get them ready again for when we discover what part Merle had to play in their break up in a future chapter...Boo! Hiss! Yeah, yeah, yeah...If you want a sweet version of Merle check out my 'Trying to not to love you' story instead - cause you're gonna hate Merle after this one!

After Daryl's startling revelation Rick debated whether Carol should be forced into his company again by letting him lead her to the infirmary. Rick shared a glance with T-Dog who simply shrugged his large shoulders to indicate that he didn't have a clue. Rick knew that every moment they delayed the worse things could get with Hershel. He loped off down the corridor to where Carol was sitting quietly stroking a wet cloth against Hershel's forehead.

"Tell Carl exactly what you need, he can make the run for you. I'm not going to force you into Daryl's company any more than is necessary; the two of you obviously have some unresolved issues between you." Rick sighed heavily and ran his fingers through his thick, wavy dark brown hair. Carol looked up gratefully and nodded her head.

"Carl already volunteered; he's getting my backpack and has a list already made out. I basically told him to grab everything that he can in the line of bandages and such but gave him pretty specific things to look out for too. God! I'm so sorry, Rick – we have enough to deal with already without letting my skeletons out of the closet too!" Carol rested her head against the metal support of the cot frame and hunched her shoulders together.

"Daryl seems to think that there is every chance that Sophia might have been his…did Ed know?" Rick kept his voice purposely low to prevent anyone that was walking by from overhearing their conversation. He could tell from the way that Carol's shoulders started to shake that he was right.

"I had just started seeing Ed when I got word that my Grandfather had died – Ed had been pressuring me to sleep with him but I kept putting him off; a few weeks after I got back from the funeral having jumped right back where I left off with Daryl I suspected that I might be pregnant. So when Ed started pressuring me again – I agreed. Less than a month later we were married and Sophia came along a 'little early'. It wasn't until Ed had to undergo a complete medical for some new health insurance policy at the car dealership that he realised that there was no way he could have fathered Sophia because he was sterile; I think Sophia must have been around three or so at the time."

"And let me take a wild guess here….that's when the beatings started too. Why didn't you just leave him, Carol? You could have easily contacted Daryl and told him about Sophia…and yet you chose to stay."

"Ed always made it perfectly clear what he would do to both me and Sophia if I ever tried to leave him…I tried it once and ended up in hospital for a month; I never tried it again."

"That's the same reason you never told Daryl that he was a father?" Rick asked gently, crouching down at Hershel's bedside so that he was at the same level at the woman he was gently questioning.

"No, not the only reason anyway…I was pregnant before with Daryl's baby and he made it perfectly clear even then that he had no interest in becoming a father…" Carol knew that she had shocked Rick with her blunt words and looked over at him. "He left me the week after we had become engaged and in the same week that I found out for sure that I was pregnant…"

"What happened to the baby? I know you too well to think that you wouldn't have gone through with the pregnancy." Rick lay a comforting hand on Carol's arm and she smiled softly at his gentle touch.

"I had the baby too early; they said it was due to undue stress. He was perfect, Rick but so small. I named him Benjamin and had him buried next to my Granddad." Carol choked back the tears at the memory of her sweet, little boy.

"Oh, honey I'm so sorry; I wouldn't have dreamed of asking you…." Rick bit back a heavy sigh, feeling guilt rise up at the way he had pushed with his questioning. Carol swallowed hard against the lump in her throat and summoned a small, trembling smile.

"I'll be okay, don't worry so much Rick. Go and get on with what you have to do…Go on, I'll be fine." Carol gave his shoulder a slight nudge and Rick rose to his feet, dropping a kiss to the top of his head before walking over to the door. Carol turned her attention back to the ailing man on the bed and dipped her cloth into the cool water sitting in a bowl by her feet.

As Rick went to step through the doorway; he saw that Lori and Maggie were wrapped in each other's arms just to the left of the opening. He knew then that they had both overheard the conversation; one that he'd hoped wouldn't be shared around.

"No one else needs to know, okay Ladies? Carol doesn't need any more stress right now, she's skirting on the edge of collapse as it is. Maggie, try to keep her occupied with your Dad as much as possible. And Lori – I don't mean to be nasty; but you're…"Rick paused before completing his sentence to his wife; not wanting to strain the already tense atmosphere between the two of them even further.

"I know Rick; I'm probably the last thing she needs to reminder her right now." Lori smoothed a hand over her swollen belly and tipped her head forward. "Go on, Rick. Go do whatever it is you need to. Maggie and I will take care of the rest; I'll go and rest in a cell a little further down the block and Beth can trade shifts with Carol in looking after Hershel. You take Carl and T-Dog with you, we'll be okay with just Glenn."

"Okay, stay safe." Rick encompassed both ladies with his glance, but lingered for a long moment staring into Lori's liquid, brown eyes.

"You too, hotshot." Lori replied softly, before turning to waddle down in search of a cell block far enough away as not to cause Carol any distress. Rick followed her with his eyes for a moment longer before whistling for Carl to come out and join him.

"I take it you heard all of that too?" He asked his son quietly, noticing the sheen of emotion in Carl's eyes. Carl sniffed a little and rubbed the back of his hand against his nose; before nodding silently.

"And you know not to tell anyone else what you heard?" Rick waited for Carl to nod again before jangling his keys in his hand. "Okay – you take T-Dog and Daryl and head over to the infirmary and I'll take the rest of these guys back over to the commissary to load up the food. Meet you back here in a couple of hours, okay?"

"Yeah, what'll I tell Daryl? He's gonna wonder why Carol didn't come along…" Carl shifted the position of his borrowed Stetson further forward on his head, so that its large brim shadowed his red rimmed eyes.

"No need to tell him anything Carl, I'm sure he realises just how much of a shock this must be to Carol. You just go ahead and get that stuff for Hershel; go on now." Rick gently nudged Carl out of the door and watched his son scrub his nose with the back of his hand; straightening his shoulders as he walked along to meet T-Dog at the end of the corridor. Rick leant back against the doorframe and ran a hand through his dark hair; I bet someone up there is laughing their asses off as us right now; if a zombie apocalypse wasn't enough let's bring on the angst and play guess the Daddy too!

"It's like our whole life has become a shitty version of 'Jerry Springer'; all we need is a zombified Ed suddenly demanding a paternity test and taking pot shots at Daryl and it'd be perfect…" Rick mumbled miserably under his breath and then felt instantly guilty for his thoughts; after all wasn't he experiencing exactly the same thing with the whole thing with Shane and Lori? He pushed himself away from the doorframe and told himself to get a grip - as Carol had said to him earlier - he had enough shit to deal with without taking on any more baggage. He would go and deal with the other former inmates and sort the remaining food and maybe then he could stop and think about how this latest fiasco brought about by Merle would affect the balance within the group.