A/N: Sorry about the time between chapters. I was busy playing Final Fantasy IV and Chrono Trigger. I don't own Neon Genesis Evangelion, Sonic the Hedgehog, the Incredible Hulk, Tales of Symphonia, or Fantastic Four.

As the pulse rifle was chopped clean in half, Sachiel and his Human were thrown back into a hillside. "Damn!" said Sachiel as he looked at his battery gauge. Three minutes of power were left. He had to get serious. After flipping a switch, his progressive knife popped out of its shoulder and Sachiel charged, but stopped. Right under his foot was Leliel, transfixed with horror and unable to move. If he'd step down any further, Leliel would be crushed, which is hard to believe when it concerns an angel in an alternate universe. If it were Bardiel or his father, he wouldn't hesitate, but now…

The Eva leapt up in the air and slashed again. Shinji blocked as best he could, and the two locked blades. The problem was the Eva could move around; Shinji could not.

One minute before Shinji deactivated and the reactor exploded. He still couldn't attack, and the Eva was closing in on victory.

"SACHIEL!" screamed Israfel, "FORGET ABOUT THAT LITTLE BASTARD! KILL THAT THING!"

But Sachiel couldn't. He just couldn't. Not with Leliel in the path.

Thirty seconds left. The Eva stabbed into Shinji's body and the pain from Shinji's gut was felt in Sachiel as well. But then…a blue blur appeared and knocked Leliel away from under Shinji's foot.

"What the…Sonic?" Finally, Sachiel could fight back without holding back.

"No, ya dumbass!" yelled Bardiel. "Kill that thing!"

Ten seconds left. Without restraint, Sachiel grabbed the Eva's arm, ripped it clean off, and rammed Shinji's arm into the Eva's body, searching for the reactor.

Three seconds left. Shinji ripped the reactor out and threw it as hard as he could into the air.

Time was up. Shinji and the Eva both fell to the ground with a thud whilst the reactor, in space, exploded. The solar winds moved the radiation for a long time until in another universe it hit into a space shuttle and altered the bodies of the four passengers. They gained incredible powers, and decided to fight for good. Sounds like a fantastic spin-off, doesn't it?

"DAMN!" yelled Sachiel as he pounded his plug's canopy. His Humangelion was as good as dead. "FATHER! YOU CAN'T KEEP THIS UP FOREVER! I WILL KILL YOU!" Sachiel screamed as he began to plan his revenge for the next time he was in Shinji.

As recovery crews fished the plug out, Sachiel was bitter, but Israfel was even bitterer.

"Sachiel, you disobeyed a direct order! Thousands of lives could have been lost because of that!" Israfel was nearing a level of anger the Hulk had never dreamed of. She backhanded him across the face twice. "You never, NEVER, go against what I say, or people die! Now get your scrawny ass home before I actually get angry, because you wouldn't like me when I'm angry!" Israfel was almost done, but the little voice in her head told her to go for the coup de grace. She ran back to Sachiel and made the field goal kick between his legs. Needless to say, he doubled over and went for a brief nap in la-la land.

Sachiel only had a backbone when facing two people: Bardiel and his father. Against anyone else, he would run away scared, and this is no exception. Israfel was his guardian, shouldn't she have some compassion when it came to him?

Sandolphon was shocked at her best friend's brutality. "You didn't have to yell at him like that, you know. And the extra point was completely unnecessary!"

Israfel glared at her. "He went against a direct order to disregard that angel's life for the good of Tokyo-3. There's no excuse for that. Lillith wouldn't do that, she'd-"

"Be a good little automaton droid and do what she was told, right?" Sandolphon knew she was the only person that could get to Israfel when she was like this. For Sachiel's manhood, as well as the still-hurting Lillith, she'd have to be able to convince Israfel to not be so hard of Sachiel.

"We're talking about a fourteen-year old boy here, he's not going to do everything we want him to! YOU volunteered to take care of him, YOU'RE the hardass in his life, and if you keep this up crap up, he might think about killing YOU once he's done with Bardiel and Adam. Lillith might be a more cheerful girl, but I doubt she's got as much depth as Sachiel does. Now for the love of God, go after him so I can get the remains of the 4th Eva back to the lab. If not, the guys are itching for a catfight and I'm not one to argue." Israfel was hesitant, but she started to run after Sandolphon put on her revealing cat costume and tried to tackle her.

When Israfel finally got home, she looked in the room. Sachiel was gone, and there was a note. It simply read 'Gone out. Be back in a couple days.'

Looks like I picked the wrong month to quit drinking beer, Israfel said as she opened up her emergency container. It was empty and in there was another note. In this case, by Adam. It read 'This is bad for you, so I'll take it off your hands. If you come for it, you will die.'

Adam and Sachiel: couldn't live with them, couldn't leave them to their own devices. Damn, she needed a break. She called up the guys at SEELE that would deal with Sachiel. Meanwhile, her hentai rentals were gathering dust and she needed to…clean. Yeah, clean.

Sachiel felt at ease with the world at long last. Maybe it was because he had to hold it while in Shinji, maybe it was something stupid, or maybe it was the fact he had just served Israfel possibly her first canister of PWNAGE in strategy and results. Who knew?

The field he was in was nice. The sun was shining, the wind was cool, and the leeches were sucking him dry.

A sound was heard not to far away. Like someone talking…

"Crikey! An' here we are, looking at the elusive burrow root, found only in this here field! Now if I just-"

"Leliel!" Sachiel yelled out as he ran over to him. "What're you doing out here?"

The Sea of Dirac looked at him. "Oh. I'm just here to get away from it all. After almost getting killed earlier today I felt like relaxing in the middle of desolate field where no one can hear you scream. Come on, I'll get the food cooked."

"I'm sorry…about today," Sachiel said as he took some of the glop that Leliel claimed was food. "I could've killed you…"

"Don't worry about it!" Leliel said as he sat back on the tree stump. I don't know how a creature that is only a black portal can do it, but he did. "I mean, Bardiel was there, and I actually saw Shinji in battle! I could've died right there and died happy. You need to stop apologizing all the time. Look at Colette! Nobody likes her."

"Good point."

"Man, I love it out here!" Leliel said as he ate some more food. "There's so many different creatures out here. When I was little, almost nothing was out in the meadows, but now it's crammed full of everything. Except cicadas. I hate cicadas."

"What happened to them all?" Sachiel was seeing that everyone in this universe had at least one quirk. He wondered what Leliel's was with the cicadas.

"Well, it all started back in 2000 with that Second Impact and-"

But Leliel couldn't finish. A bunch of SEELE troops came out of the forest, found Sachiel, and put him on a van. He was heading back to see good old Israfel.

"You idiot!" Israfel yelled. Sachiel was sitting in a pitch-black room, save the fact Israfel was standing in a small pool of light. "First you go against direct orders, then you SPLIT on us? Are you sure you want to keep piloting Unit Shinji? If you do, you're going to have to actually not run away when anyone yells at you."

"Will you just relax! I mean, we won right? And the Eva's in good shape so Sandolphon can figure out how it ticks and-"

"Those are excuses, damn it! You have to follow what I say if you want to stay as Shinji's pilot. So are you going to stay?"

Sachiel thought about the situation. It felt right to stay here. After all…"It doesn't feel right Lillith has to do everything on here own. She's still not recovered and-"

Israfel could almost puke. "Just shove it! If you're going to stay for a stupid reason like that, you're no good to us. Leave. You can pick your stuff up at my apartment. Now get the hell out of here!"

So this is the end, Sachiel thought as he picked up his things from Israfel's apartment. I bump off two Evas only to get kicked out of SEELE for a technicality. Life sucks. It's official. He would be shipped back to his teacher's house at three o'clock, so he didn't have much time.

When Sachiel got to the train station, he was surprised at the four people he saw. "Leliel, Bardiel, Lillith, and…Sandolphon?"

"Sorry you're going," Leliel said as he handed Sachiel a tape. "Watch it when you're alone."

"I'm sorry about Israfel," Sandolphon said while Leliel and Bardiel drooled over her. "She's always stuck to the rules. If she doesn't, she just doesn't feel right on the inside."

"You're quite the bastard," Bardiel said as he not so playfully punched Sachiel in the gut. Sachiel returned the favor by bashing in Bardiel's family jewels. "You watch your ass out there," Bardiel remarked in a voice akin to Mickey Mouse, "Because I'm the guy that's going to kill you."

"Not if I kill you first," Sachiel said as he shook Bardiel's hand.

"Here," Bardiel said as he took a cylindrical object out of his belt. "I swiped it from your dad. So now you've got competition when it comes to killing me."

When Sachiel locked his gaze with Lillith, the two stood there for a minute. Then, Lillith lost their battle of wills and jumped up to hug Sachiel. "If it weren't for you I'd be dead right now. Thanks!" A smiley appeared above her head and winked.

"Uh, Lillith? How did you do that?"

"Um…hackors?"

They all had a good chuckle, but then reality flared up again. His time was up. The train was coming.

When Israfel got there five minutes later, she almost cried. Why did she have to be so hard of Sachiel? No one was there in the rain except for Sachiel's four friends.

"You've done a lot of shallow things but this was terrible," Sandolphon said, "and I'm Ms. Expert of Shallow Things. He's not here, and I don't think you're going to see him here ever again. Now you should head home, because I don't think anyone here wants to look at you."

"Actually," Bardiel and Leliel said as they whipped out cameras, "We'll take some for the trip."

Sachiel's gone, Israfel thought as she returned home. It's for the best. I just wish I had…"One more chance." She opened up the door, only to be slapped in the face with a piece of paper.

"You gave me the wrong ticket, ya hoser!" Sachiel said. "Man, and you say I'm stupid!"

Something in Israfel told her not to stand for that crap, but another part of her told her that she had gotten her second chance. She smiled, and saw Sachiel had his tape on. She could use a break.

"Just another day of being a cold hearted bastard," Adam remarked as he sat back in his chair. Life was good, and it was time for him to reach for a cold one. "What the… a note?…Who's this Bardiel? DAMN YOU BARDIEL!"

A/N: Well, life's getting back to normal and next chapter will pit Lillith and Sachiel against the dreaded 5th Eva! Stay tuned for Lillith I or Why the Hell did we Paint it Orange!