I. AM. SO. SORRRY! DDX
See what happened is my grades dropped and my dad has not allowed me to be on my computer AT. ALL. ever since I put up that apology! He even deleted my story, so I had to retype everything from this chapter! (Luckily, I write everything by hand first (kinda why it takes so long to update... -_-''), so if my computer crashes, or if I lose the file or if my DAD FUCKING DELETES IT, I still have the story.)
Anyway, here is Chapter 4! I've decided I'm going to be changing the cover image to suit the chapter :P Why am I typing this? No one cares about the author notes in the beginning XD Oh well, for the rare chance you are reading this: What are you waiting for!? i've kept you waiting for weeks, start reading all ready!
~Princessa
Gohan looked around, seeing that everyone was indeed without a halo. They were alive again. He felt a pang in his chest as he saw the smiles and tears as everyone rejoiced. He felt guilty. He shouldn't feel so upset and disappointed; he should be happy and laughing with everyone else. But despite telling himself this, Gohan couldn't bring himself to do so. It hurt. It hurt more than he thought it would, and he didn't want to admit it, but all that they were being given wasn't enough for him. He felt selfish and greedy, but he didn't care, he wanted to see Piccolo. It wasn't fair.
Heaving a sigh, Gohan looked up and tried to concentrate on everyone else, his smile still in place. He scanned over and saw Dende glancing at him, his gaze barely noticeable to the others, but Gohan was positive the young guardian was watching him. Almost immediately after he saw Dende watching him, the young namekian's gaze snapped to Trunks, laughing at whatever the lavender haired man had said. It was too late though; Gohan had seen the barely concealed sadness and, was it pity? No, but it was close. More like empathy.
Gohan suddenly felt very insecure and nervous. What if Dende had figured out that he wasn't fully happy? What would he do or say? But Gohan had seen something else as well. It had seemed like glee, and excitement. Peeking at the namekian again, he saw no signs of any of the emotions he'd witnessed.
'Maybe it was my imagination..?' he mused, but shook his head at the thought. 'No, I definitely saw it, there's no way I could mistake it…' but what could he do to prove he had. There really was no way to do so. And bringing it up to the Guardian would only cause trouble he was sure. Sighing, he walked over to Videl and his mother, trying his best to hide the pain in his heart, a herculean task, even after all the time and practice he'd had to deal with it.
Dende let the sigh he'd been holding in heave out of his lungs as he glanced again and saw that Gohan was immersed in a conversation with Chi-Chi and Videl. "That was WAY too close! I need to stop this, I'm going to get found out if I'm caught again…"
Suddenly, the Lookout rumbled and shook, the chatter ceasing as everyone tried to stand upright. A warm yellow glow engulfed the large floating platform, forcing Dende to cover his eyes. After it finally vanished, he slowly opened his eyes, glancing around to get the spots out of his vision. When he looked back around at everyone, he no longer saw the aged faces of his friends. He saw the young faces he hadn't known in centuries. It was as though he'd been thrown back in time, as if everyone's ages had suddenly been reversed.
It was though time itself had been rewound. He glanced from one face to another, jumping from expression to expression, seeing the shock and confusion on all the faces he had not seen in decades, in centuries. A deep, booming rumble came from the Dragon above their heads. Slowly understanding slipped into his mind, and he saw the same awareness seep into the group, catching each person, one right after the other like a wildfire.
The Lookout was filled with cheers and laughter, hooting and hollering. As everyone talked at once, Dende studied each person closely, seeing just how young everyone had become. Wrinkles were gone, grey hair disappeared, bodies renewed and returned to states they had not seen in decades. As he listened, he heard Chi-Chi and Bulma exclaiming that they looked like their teenage selves again. The other girls seemed to have the same belief. More and more he heard everyone to have the same belief. More and more he heard everyone speaking the same words, and the young guardian came to the conclusion that everyone was at the age of eighteen once more. The appearances certainly confirmed this. Even the hairstyles of his friends had been changed to those that everyone had worn when they were originally teenagers.
Krillin was bald again, Trunks' hair was short, Goten had the same unruly mop of hair he'd had before, Vegeta's stuck up once more, though surprisingly he had a few bangs in his eyes. Bulma's hair was long, a little past her shoulders, and next to her daughter, the two could easily have passed for twins. Chi-Chi's hair was in a high ponytail, Videl's in her two low pigtails she'd had when she first met the group, and Gohan's spiked up with a few rebellious bangs hanging in his eyes like when he'd been in high school, just as Dende remembered. The only person who didn't change substantially was Goku, instead remaining almost the same as before, if not a bit shorter.
As he listened to bits and pieces of different conversations, Dende saw Krillin and Gohan break from the throng and make their way over to him. He smiled warmly, licking knowing eyes with Krillin as he saw the ex-monk smile.
'Not much longer. He should be here soon.' He whispered mentally, making sure Gohan wouldn't be aware he was speaking mentally with their friend.
'Awesome! I can't even begin to imagine Gohan's reaction. I'd bet money he bursts into tears.' Krillin joked light heartedly.
"Hey Dende, does any of this make sense to you?" Krillin spoke out loud, gabbing a thumb at the large crowd. Dende smiled, glancing at his group of unlikely friends.
'That's a given, but I'm willing to take a bet if you can come up with something good.'
"Not really, but nothing ever makes sense when it comes to all of you." He laughed as Vegeta started yelling at Goku for an unknown reason, the taller Saiyan laughing as he tried to pat Vegeta's shoulder, his hand being immediately slapped away. Krillin's face morphed into a cheeky grin, but he skillfully masked it as a response to Dende's actually spoken commnt.
'Oh yeah? Like how much?'
"Ahh, harsh! But well deserved I suppose. All I know is I haven't looked this good in years!" He immediately stroke a pose, gliding a hand over his well-waxed head and winking, firing an imaginary gun as he did so. Gohan doubled over in laughter, wrapping his arms around his ribs.
'Hmmm, I bet 2,000 zeni that he'll embarrass Piccolo in some way, but Piccolo will take it and not care.' The guardian skillfully hid his smile, knowing full well that Piccolo would be missing Gohan too much to be embarrassed over whatever the demi-saiyan did upon their most-likely tear soaked reunion.
"Yeah, believe what you will Krillin, believe what you will."
'Piccolo not care about being embarrassed? Are you trying to lose or something? Or have you just forgotten what the former "DEMON King" is like? I bet you 3,000 zeni that he yells at Gohan, maybe even blasts him a bit. Gohan embarrassing him is a given as well.'
"Again, harsh! You've gotten awfully crel for a supposed 'kind-hearted' Guardian!"
'Oh, your ON!' The two mentally shook hands as Gohan calmed down from his giggling.
"Who ever said I was kind-hearted?" he laughed.
"Ah, come on you guys, we should be catching up, not bickering!" he clapped a hand on each of his friends' shoulders, smiling at each in turn.
"I gotta tell you, I've missed you guys! It's good to see people I haven't seen in, jeez, Kami knows how long!" he laughed, rubbing the back of his head awkwardly.
"A little over two centuries actually." Dende stated matter-of-factly, raising a couple of fingers and wiggling them, a cheeky grin on his lips. Gohan and Krillin did a double take before Gohan chuckled breathlessly, Krillin mubling that the namekian was a "smartass" or something of the like.
"Man, we've been dead for over two-hundred years? It didn't feel that long!" Krillin said, a smile on his face. Gohan's expression darkened slightly, and he turned his head, looking out to the endless sky.
"It felt a lot longer than that to me…" he said soflty, his eyes somber. Dende shot a glare at Krillin, who immediately flinched, scrambling for a change of subject. Before he could find one however, the air warped in the middle of the Lookout, gaining the short warrior's attention.
He felt the air catch in his throat, and he blindly grabbed for Dende's robes, unable or unwilling, he wasn't sure which, to take his eyes off the spot. Dende looked away from his forlorn friend down to Krillin, then followed his gaze when he saw the speechlessness his friend was in.
He too felt as though his lungs had been stripped of oxygen as he saw the air twist and swirl, before finally it just stopped. In that spot were Baba and a very familiar form, arms crossed and trademark scowl in place. Krillin finally managed to rip his eyes away from the two long enough to lock gazes with Dende before the two smiled ear to ear. They looked over again and caught the gaze of the tall namekian, nodding his head only slightly in acknowledgement of the duo.
Gohan felt different. He immediately knew something had changed. It took a moment, but he felt as if something had just been… made right. One moment, his heart had been throbbing painfully, made aware his suffering had not been near as long as he'd imagined it, but then, it was as if the pain had been ebbed. Like a hole in his heart had been mended, even refilled.
That was it. The hole in his heart that had been made when Piccolo died, the crater that had been gouged into his very soul when Piccolo's existence had been ripped from him. It wasn't there. The pain was still there, but it was like a dull ache, a sore-ness, but not a knee-buckling, inhumane torture it had been for so long. Confused, Gohan turned, and his abused heart stopped. His breathing stopped. Time stopped. All he could do was stare. He couldn't move, he couldn't speak, he couldn't even blink. He didn't want to, for fear that the being in front of him would disappear once more.
He was vaguely aware that the thrum of everyone's talking had all but stopped, he was aware a few if not nearly all were watching him. But he couldn't bring himself to fully let it sink in. He just continued to stare. Then the figure turned his head, black onyx eyes met his own, and Gohan involuntarily took a step forward, then another and another. He froze again, still unsure, his mind completely numb, a small "feh" met his ears from the person in front of him; green lids covered black eyes for a moment before opening one more. A soft smirk lifted one corner of emerald lips.
"Hey Kid." Two words. Those simple two words were all it took. Time sped up once more; Gohan's heart started beating. It beat fast and hard and painfully against his chest, in his throat, his breathing coming in uick soft gasps. His head swam and he felt exceedingly dizzy.
"…Piccolo…" his voice was so low he wasn't even sure he'd spoken out loud.
"Piccolo…!" he tired again, a soft murmur. How sweet it was to say that name again. The pain in his heart all but disappeared, he took another step forward, and the tall warrior turned to fully face the stunned demi-saiyan.
"PICCOLO!" He cried, suddenly braking into a run before even realizing his feet were moving. Before either were aware, Gohan had thrown himself forward, wrapping his arms around the namekian's waist as tight as he could, both sent sprawling onto the pristine white tiles, Gohan's grip unyielding, his face buried into the white of Piccolo's cape and the purple of his gi.
A low growl met his ears, making his heart jump against his ribcage. He was amazed that after all this time, Piccolo's growl was still the same. It was as if all the time apart had not influenced either of them in the least. But when had it ever? They could spend years apart back in the day, and it was as though they had only been apart fro a few weeks at the most. Gohan felt his eyes beginning to burn, and he buried his face deeper into the soft fabric, wanting the feeling to disappear. He couldn't. He wouldn't. He refused to.
He felt Piccolo push himself up onto his elbows, then up onto his hands, into a sitting position; all but spilling the pile of emotionally unstable half-breed into his lap. Gohan felt a hand on the back of his shirt grasping the fabric tight, and instinctively wrapped a hand around his own wrist, a silent pledge that the taller man would have Hell if he tried to pry the demi-saiyan off.
"Let go Kid." He could hear the half-hidden, half-meant threat behind his venomous words, and Gohan shook his head jerkingly, defiantly. Piccolo tried a quick tug on the shirt in his hand, testing the shorter man's hold, and wasn't at all surprised to feel the arms around his waist tighten, reminding him vaguely of iron fetters, especially since they were attached to the specific person in his lap, all but glued to him like a barnacle.
He could feel his cheeks flush violently, and caught the desperate attempts at hidden laughter surrounding him. He was right: it was extremely embarrassing. As he tried for another tug on Gohan's shirt, another growl rising out of his gut and out his mouth, he felt something odd. Looking down he quickly solved his confusion. His gi was starting to feel wet, and he could feel slight, barely even noticeable, quivers coming from Gohan.
His expression instantly softened and his growling stopped. Watching intently, his was positive he felt the little tremors Gohan was desperately trying to contain and hide, even as his gi grew wet.
'Damn…' He cursed mentally. The Kid still had so much control over him. It always seemed to hurt whenever he saw even the slightest sadness on Gohan's face. Gohan had always tired to well, so hard to hide his emotions, especially around Piccolo, and especially when it was sadness. Gohan knew Piccolo hated it when he was sad or cried, viewing it as a sign of weakness. He always tried his damnedest to never shed a tear in front of him, but when he did, it hurt Piccolo more than he liked.
How many times had he seen him cry? How many times had he seen those tears flow over Gohan's cheeks? Yet, every single time again, it hurt. It hurt so fucking much. It made his stomach twist and his heart tighten painfully, made him want to take back what he'd said, made him want to change whatever it was he had to change to just make him stop crying, to just let the tears cease. He truly hated what it did to him.
"Gohan." He said, his voice carefully uncaring. Gohan's grip tightened, his face buried deeper into the soaked gi. Piccolo sighed, his grip on Gohan's shirt loosening before he let go completely.
"It's fine Kid." He said softly, so none of the others would hear. He felt the boy tense, then a tiny shudder.
"It's fine." He said again, replacing his hand on Gohan's back reassuringly. He felt awkward and out of character doing it, but he knew it was best, so he ignored his hesitance. He ignored the people around them. He ignored Krillin's open-mouthed gawking and the snicker coming from Dende. "You owe me 3,000 zeni" -? What did the little shit mean by that? Whatever, it didn't matter. He completely blocked out everything, just as he did when he meditated. All that mattered was Gohan and that they were together.
He felt Gohan lift his head a little, but it wasn't enough for Piccolo to see his face.
"I'm not…" he said weakly, and piccolo could hear how thick his voice was. He smirked at the man's determination and defiance, but let it fade off his face almost immediately.
"Yes, you are." He shot back softly. Gohan lifted his head more, and Piccolo saw the deep purple stains, a harsh contrast to the rest of his gi.
"I'm not crying damn it..." he said before looking up at his mentor, tears streaming down his face and his cheeks flushed. His vision was blurred with unshed tears and piccolo felt a pang in his heart as he saw all the emotions swimming in his dark, black pools.
"Don't tell me I'm crying…" his choice quivered and Piccolo watches as more tears overfilled his eyes and raced down his soaked cheeks. Raising his hand, Piccolo moved it up and sat it on Gohan's head, ruffling the unruly spikes softly. Gohan squeezed his eyes tight, bowing his head as his tears dripped off his face. His shoulders shook once, then again, and again. Finally they just started quivering and a choked sob ripped from his throat. Piccolo felt the arms around his waist move as Gohan let go of his own wrist, instead grasping handfuls of his gi. He buried his face into the tall namekian's chest once more, openly sobbing out all the pain and anguish and happiness. He hugged Piccolo tight, and he felt as Piccolo softly ruffled his hair. Not enough to allow the others to see and know, but enough to comfort the demi-saiyan. His hand slipped down to grasp the base of his skull and his neck, squeezing softly, reassuringly.
'It's fine Kid. I've missed you too, more than I care to or could even try to admit…. It's good to finally see you again.' Piccolo's voice rang through his mind, drowning him in the sensations. He was almost ashamed that he'd nearly forgotten what it was like to speak telepathically with his ex-mentor. Memories hit him of the two of them just sitting in silence, a quiet conversation that the world could never hear going back and forth between their minds. Gohan's eyes burned as he cried everything out. His lungs burned as he desperately gulped oxygen into his body, only to lose it inbetween his sobbing gasps.
Piccolo saw everyone watching them from his peripheral vision. He saw smirks, smiles, and a few teary faces, but he couldn't bring himself to care about their judgmental gazes. He saw someone walk forward and looked up slightly to see Goku, a soft smile on his face and a knowing look in his eyes. Piccolo felt the corner of his lip twitch, but refused to let himself smile as well.
Goku watched as his son cried his heart out, a pang of sadness attacking his own. He was briefly reminded of when Piccolo had died in the first place. After earth had exploded, he'd been so upset. He understood Piccolo had let go on purpose when he'd transported to the ship, but that didn't stop the pain and guilt. The ship landed on Planet Tuffle and he, Pan and Trunks had gotten off to find the others.
He'd walked in a bit of a daze into one of the buildings. At the time he wasn't aware but after wards he had realized just how empty the building had been. Of course, by that point he had understood why. He had no clue when he first set foot into the building. As they walked down a hallway, they had heard the sounds of a wall falling apart. They ran down hallway after hallway, until they came to the area they had heard the destruction coming from.
Goku could still see the shock on Trunks' face and the slight fear and confusion on Pan's. There, standing in the middle of the hallway with rubble and destruction all around him, had been Gohan, his ki flaring dangerously and his hair a bright blonde. Now that he thought about it, Gohan had probably not even known he'd transformed. He'd been so consumed by his emotions he'd completely snapped. His face had been tear stained and his fist was bloody, broken and bruised, a steady pool of blood on the floor as he continuously punched the wall.
The wall had a large crater, a hole shaped like Gohan's fist in the center. He'd been hitting it over and over and over again as they had come across him, his anguish and rage and sorrow completely consuming him as he cried out with each punch. It had taken quite a while before Goku had been able to get through to him. When he had finally gotten the man's attention, he had just stood there for a moment, completely unmoving like a statue, his broken hand dangling at his side. When he had turned to face his father, the look of utter loss and sadness in his dark, soulless eyes was surely going to haunt Goku for the rest of eternity.
"…He's gone Dad… he's gone…" was all that that man had been able to say before he dropped to his knees. Goku remembered the cold weight he'd felt in his gut at those words, knowing exactly who he was talking about. He wasn't sure at the time how Gohan had known so quickly of Piccolo's death, but the fact had still remained that he had and he had not taken it well at all.
All Goku had known to do was to go to Gohan and do what little he could to try and console his heart-broken son. He held him, letting him cry as much as he had needed, unable to say much of anything aside from the tedious "I know"'s, and "I'm so sorry"'s. he never wanted to see that state of utter un-control in his son again. It still pained him to remember.
As he looked on now, he wasn't sure just how much Gohan had still suffered. He knew it had been painful, so painful all this time, and he felt immensely guilty, but he was actually glad he had not been around to see his son's suffering, to see just how dead Gohan was inside without Piccolo.
Piccolo had been his first teacher, his first and closest friend, just as he had been to the imposing warrior. They had a relationship unlike any of their other friends. The fact that they had such an unforgiving and painful separation, that they'd been forced apart so brutally and swiftly. It just hadn't been right. As he watched them silently, Goku was pleased to see a certain contentment in the unlikely pair. He smiled once more, turning away to walk over to his other friends, his mind deciding to let the duo be. Looking at the group, his eyes settled on a specific face. Maybe he could still goad Vegeta into a fight.
