Chapter Four

The next morning, Brendan went for a walk about the town. He was used to going to different places where he didn't know anybody; deals and running clubs prompted it, but he didn't feel quite as purposeful as he used to. For the first time in forever, Brendan felt small, powerless. He walked the streets and no one batted an eyelid. Well, a young lad gave him the eye by the river but Brendan brushed him off with a cooling gaze and he wilted, his eyes averted. It didn't make Brendan feel as desirable as it used to. When had this happened to him? When did it become important for those eyes on him to be blue and framed in delicate lashes? Why did Stephen's eyes have to follow him everywhere?

He turned a corner and came across a pub. Deciding the only thing to numb his thoughts was a strong whiskey, he went inside. It was fairly small, unimposing. Brendan ordered his drink and sat alone in the corner, hoping to go unnoticed. Half way through his drink, he noticed something at the bar. A young lad, eighteen perhaps? Was peering over the bar while the pub manager wasn't looking, about to grab one of the bottles on display below the bar. Brendan smirked, eyeing him carefully. He wasn't the only one; a bald man was watching him from a nearby table, licking his lips.

Brendan felt an odd feeling settle in the bottom of his stomach. His muscles tensed, prepared. The lad procured his drink without incident, his eyes gleaming in triumph. The bald man was about to make his move, his hand resting on the table ready to rise. Brendan felt himself about to move, he couldn't work out why. Before either of them did so however, another man walked in, dark hair mussed, defined physique and a hard stare. The young lad turned round, his face splitting into a grin. He ran at him, throwing himself eagerly into his arms. The older man looked startled and then held him close, his lips in his hair.

Brendan looked around himself, eyes flashing dangerously. What were they thinking of? Being that public about it? But Brendan's fear was unwarranted. No one paid them any mind, and when they walked towards the bar, they were greeted by the barman like regulars, the young lad hiding the bottle behind his back carefully.

"I'd have bought you one" the older man whispered into his ear.

The lad shrugged. "I don't need you for everything, do I?"

Brendan drained his drink and rose swiftly, unable to stomach any more.

Xxx

Brendan went back to his room, deciding to give Cheryl a call.

"Alright, Sis? How's things ticking over?"

"Oh you know, not so bad. When are you coming back, love?"

"Soon, soon" Brendan said, a little uncertain. "Warren not giving ye any trouble?"

"We need to have words about that, Bren-"

"Not now" Brendan said, rubbing his temple.

There were some other voices in the background, Cheryl held the phone away from her mouth. "It's Brendan" she told someone. "Did you want a word?"

"Who's that?" Brendan asked, trying to keep his voice level.

"Sure, love?"

Brendan was becoming agitated. "Cheryl? Who is it?"

"Oh, sorry" Cheryl said, addressing him once more. "Ste had been asking after you"

Brendan blinked, lost for words for a moment. He recovered quickly. "What for?"

"Just wondered where you were. He's here now"

"He didn't wanna talk?"

"No" Cheryl paused. "You two haven't fallen out have you? Honestly, Bren you never seem to keep a hold of friends"

"We're fine" Brendan said shortly.

"Well alright then. I better go, Warren's just walked in"

"He's there?" Brendan didn't like how Warren was already sticking his nose in.

"Yes and Brendan-"

"I know. We'll talk when I get back"

He hung up, his fingers twitching with agitation. Perhaps it wasn't the best idea being away right now; Warren could be up to anything. He knew far too much, it made Brendan distinctly uneasy. He hoped that Cheryl might see sense in regards to Warren and stay clear but he wasn't holding his breath. His Sister was as bad as him in clinging to old mistakes.

He decided in the end to cut his trip short.

Xxx

The first thing he did when he returned was drop his bag off at home. He hadn't taken much, a few change of clothes, some cash. Cheryl wasn't home, she must have been at the club, well, the SU bar that was their temporary club right now. Brendan gritted his teeth, he didn't like it there. It was too open, too bright. He missed the darkness and intrigue of Chez Chez.

Before he went out he took a shower and changed into another set of clothes, shrugging on his leather jacket in an attempt to feel more like himself again. It was starting to work. His heart rate picked up when he realised he might see Stephen again soon. He chastised himself for getting excited; what was he, a teenager?

He didn't have to wait long to see him. First he spotted Warren in that ridiculous puffa jacket of his. He looked smug, Brendan decided to follow him. He had popped some gum into his mouth on the way here and now he chewed it edgily. Warren turned into the alleyway and Brendan held back, his expression changing when he saw Stephen, small as he was, hunched in on himself at the bottom of the alley. Warren handed him a package, Stephen put it inside his jacket, looking carefully around before he walked on with it.

Brendan's initial response was suspicion. What was Warren playing at? Brendan needed to find out. More than that, he needed Stephen out of it. He'd killed for this boy, not that Warren knew that, how dare he use him in his games?

He went straight to the club. Stephen was there, working already. Brendan's breath hitched at the sight of him, it had been so long. He'd grown a little, at least it seemed that way to Brendan. He looked… unhappy? Brendan hoped it was about him, and then wanted to kick himself for being so sadistic.

Stephen's phone rang. He ignored it. Brendan steeled himself and strode forwards.

"That what ye do when I call ye? Is it? Or are ye trying to avoid somebody else?"

"It's none of your business" Stephen said, sneering. Brendan found it adorable, how he tried to fight it.

Brendan breathed out. "I'll be the judge of that, Stephen" his name on his lips felt odd, but somehow right. "Oh look, it's Warren" he said, feigning surprise. His blood boiled a little at the idea of Stephen having him as a contact on his phone. Stephen looked ashamed, his eyes cast to the side. "I didn't know ye two were mates. That is until I saw ye two skulking around the alleyway"

Stephen made a grab for the phone but Brendan held it out of distance. "Stay away from him. He's trouble" Brendan was serious this time, he needed Stephen to listen to him on this one, just this once.

"That's a bit rich, init? Coming from you?"

"You're angry at me, I get that, but don't use that as an excuse to do something stupid, okay?"

"Says the guy who broke me ribs!"

Brendan lost it suddenly, pushing him back against the bar, domineering in front of him. His eyes flashed, his heart pounding in his chest. He could feel Stephen's heartbeat against his hand. He was afraid. So was Brendan.

"Ye have no idea what I've done for ye" and he didn't, but that was hardly Stephen's fault, was it? Brendan couldn't stop himself. "Ye continue on thinking that I don't give a damn about ye, if it makes ye happy"

The door opened, Brendan pulled away from him, a little appalled at himself for getting worked up so easily. He barely registered what he said to Warren, or why he was laughing like it was all some big joke. He left them to it, going outside and leaning against the wall, taking in big gulps of air to steady himself. His hands were shaking, he felt sick. He couldn't believe Stephen still had this profound effect on him, it wasn't normal.

All he could think of were those accusing eyes on him, those pouted lips that Brendan wanted nothing more than to kiss and suck and nibble at. It was dangerous territory, to be so utterly wrapped up in everything Stephen did, everything Stephen was. He tried to focus on what needed to be done; he couldn't let Stephen do that job for Warren, he would convince him somehow. He had to let Brendan take care of this, take care of him. Like he was supposed to, like he should have done from the very start. Even if they never… again, Brendan would do this. He had no other choice.