A/N: The first two chapters were a hit! I'm so happy!! Lets' see if my luck holds out, huh? I had my grandma cracking up at this one and she doesn't even know the anime.

Day Three

Integra sat at her desk the following morning, struggling to see without her glasses. They'd pulled a mysterious Houdini during the night. Fortunately, she wasn't completely blind without them, but it made working a little more difficult than she would have liked.

She was just finishing up a signature on a report when-

"Yaaagggh!! Run! Run! Yaaaah!!!"

"What in bloody hell is that thing!?"

"Who cares? Run away!"

Startled, her pen scrawled a zig-zagged line across the paper, ruining her otherwise neat signature. She gripped the pen tightly in her fist and got up, moving to look out the window. She sighed heavily when she saw three new recruits scrambling madly across the grounds with an enormous six-eyed dog in hot pursuit. She shook her head and hurried to the next window, throwing it open and leaning out, "Alucard! You moron, stop that right now!"

To the shock of all three recruits, the dog skidded to a halt, panting and looking up at the window. It tilted its head, giving it a slightly comical appearance. Integra scowled.

"Yes, I'm talking to you. Get your undead hide back in here this instant or I swear, I'll seal you inside the dungeons!"

The dog let out a noise between a whiffle and a snarl and padded back toward the main building, tail wagging happily as it went. The three recruits stared after it, eyes wide in shock. Integra called down to them, "If he does that again, just shoot him." she snapped. She slammed the window shut, leaving them to chew on what she'd just told them. She turned around to find Alucard sitting inside the door, tail thumping on the floor and his tongue lolling out as he watched her expectantly. He knew he was in trouble and he couldn't have looked more tickled about it. Integra regarded him irritably as she sat back down. "Alucard, what on earth was that for? Are you trying to chase away all of our recruits?"

Alucard just closed four of his eyes unevenly, giving him a warped, eerie appearance. Integra stalked over and grabbed him by the scruff of his neck, yanking his face up to hers, "Listen mutt-face," she snapped, "You're bored; that's fine! But you're really beginning to piss me off! What am I supposed to do to get that through your thick skull!?"

Rather than give her an answer, his tongue shot out, lashing her in the face. She dropped him, sputtering and wiping her mouth with her sleeve. "Alucard!" she yelled, but he'd already turned tail and fled. She ran to the door and looked out in time to see him disappear around the corner, cackling madly. She grumbled to herself and made to close the door, only for it to suddenly swing out of her grasp at an angle and hang to one side. Integra inspected it carefully and then clenched her fists.

"Alucard, bring back those damn hinges!" she screeched.

A/N: I'm having waaay too much fun, here. ^_^