A/N: For those of you who don't know 45's were small records that usually had a single song on both sides.

The alarm on his phone kept insisting on going off, no matter how many times Booth hit the snooze button. Groaning softly, he finally rolled over and picked up his phone from the night stand to shut off the alarm. 7:30 AM had come much too soon after he'd finally been able to fall asleep. He sat up and dangled his feet over the side of the bed, stretching and yawning as he tried to convince himself that he was really ready to face the events of the day, but without much success. He flopped backward on the bed and watched the ceiling fan spin for a while as he thought about last night. Embarrassing...that was the only word to describe it. God...he wondered what Reggie's kids would think of him now. They were trying so hard to extend a hand of friendship, even bringing gifts for him, which he then managed to leave at the restaurant as he tried to avoid having his meltdown in public. God, I'm such an idiot..they'll probably think I was ditching them...that I didn't like them...I hope I get a chance to explain things to them… Gordon-Gordon had been right. This situation was loaded with emotional landmines, and he sure as hell had stepped in the middle of a big one last night...and it blew him into several overly emotional pieces.

It was that song. As much as Booth hated to admit it, it was that goddamn song that had set him off. The memories came flooding into his mind, as clear as if the whole thing had happened yesterday...he was nine years old once again, tall for his age, but still skinny as a rail. He'd gone down to the basement to ask his mom about something for school, and she was looking through her collection of 45's while she listened to a recording of Jerry Orbach singing Try to Remember on her little portable record player. She said she loved it...it was a favorite song of hers. She teased her son, suggesting that they should dance, so they whirled around the basement, laughing loudly at Booth's clumsy attempts to waltz until they heard his father yelling angrily as he stomped down the basement steps. Jared had been upstairs crying and wouldn't stop, and it had made his father furious. Dad had said his mom was a failure at caring for her children, and no son of his should be dancing like a sissy anyway...one thing led to another and there was more yelling and crying and then his dad slapped his mom hard on the cheek, drawing blood. Booth had tried to stop it from happening, saying that the dancing had been his fault, but he had been shoved aside roughly, causing him to bump his head hard on a cabinet. Then his dad smashed all of his mother's records and the record player, saying there would be no more stupid music like that in his house….

The text alert on his phone chimed. It was Bones, checking on him. He tried to pull himself together before he called her...she'd know something was wrong, but he still wanted to put a on a brave act, like everything was okay. Inhaling deeply to steady himself, he hesitated slightly and then pressed her number on speed dial.

"Mornin', Bones."

"Booth, I'm surprised you've called me. I sent the text to see how you were, but I didn't expect you to answer...it was more of rhetorical text…not that I didn't want to hear from you, but it seems unnecessary..."

"Yeah, well…I missed seeing you this morning, you know? I've been used to waking up next to you every day…seeing your beautiful face...feeling you close as I hold you in my arms..."

Brennan knew it was more than that. Booth was the one person she understood perfectly. "What's wrong, Booth? Has your mother taken a sudden turn for the worse? You sound upset."

"Nah, nothing like that. I'm fine. It's just that dinner last night didn't exactly turn out like I hoped…" He sighed sadly as he continued. "Reggie's kids are really nice people, and we were having a good time. They brought me some newspaper articles and pictures of Mom, and this album my mom has been keeping with stuff about me…"

"That sounds enjoyable. I'm glad you like them. Why would that be upsetting?" Brennan could hear the edge in her husband's voice. He was obvious still agitated by what had happened the previous evening.

"Reggie was playing the piano...that's what he does, you know? He runs through this set of music while people are having their dinner, playing the piano and singing. And I was okay with it...he's good...but then he played this song called Try to Remember, which is one of my mom's favorites, and it brought back all these bad memories for me, and...I basically came unglued at the restaurant, and I had to leave to avoid making a scene. A lot of thoughts came flooding into my mind, and before I knew it I was bawling like a baby. I couldn't even tell Reggie goodbye because I just had to get out the hell out of there. Who knows what they think of me now? Jesus...I screwed it all up, Bones. They were talking about us being a family, and I sure shot that to hell..."

"Oh, Booth, things will okay, I'm sure of it…" The concern in her voice was soothing to his wounded heart until he heard the rest of her statement. "I'm surprised you managed to maintain your composure as long as you did…"

"What? You thought I'd have a meltdown and embarrass the shit out of myself in a crowded restaurant? I've got self control, you know...I can handle my emotions.", he blustered loudly. "I'm a strong person…I was a goddamn sniper, you know? I can handle a lot of stress..."

Brennan paused, allowing Booth to vent his frustration before she continued her explanation. "I know you're a strong person emotionally, but the stress of the situation with your mother's illness added to the stress of meeting your stepfather and stepsiblings and trying to explain to them about why you might still resent your mother is the recipe for an epic emotional breakdown. You're not Superman, Booth. You don't have to be perfect. Hearing that song was the trigger that finally caused your body to give in to the stress that was mounting up inside of you. Crying helps to relieve the stress. You had reached a breaking point. That's all it was. It's quite normal to feel out of control in a situation like this, and the rush of chemicals in your brain and adrenaline in your body would most certainly cause a tremendous emotional response. It was a physiological reaction to stress in addition to the emotional reaction to the circumstances that caused you to feel so upset. The fact that you were able to maintain normalcy as long as you did yesterday demonstrates just how strong you are…"

There was another pause as Booth thought over what his wife had just said. "Sorry, Bones. I didn't mean to yell at you. I was just so mortified at how I reacted...I really just wanted to crawl into a hole and die."

"I'm sure Reggie and his children will understand, Booth. I know you realize they must be upset by the situation with your mother as well, and they also have no idea as to whether or not you're going to make an effort to be on friendly terms with them."

"I really was surprised at the effort that Melinda and Dan went to last night so that I'd feel comfortable with the situation. You're right, Bones. It's weird for them, too. Dan said he thought of my mother as being like his mother, too, and I guess it's hard for him to think of her as being my mother as well. The whole thing is just a shit storm, and I didn't do anything to make it any better when I ran out of the club last night without saying goodbye."

"I think you need to tell Reggie how you feel, Booth, and then you need to listen to what he tells you. I think you'll find out that you're both feeling the same thing."

"Yeah, you're probably right. It's gonna be hard on everyone if we don't do a better job of communicating with each other. Okay, I'll talk things over with Reggie. Thanks, Bones. I knew I'd feel better if I called you, because you always tell me the truth, even if it stings a bit. I'm gonna go get ready to visit Mom. I'll be home for dinner this evening. I love you…"

Brennan chuckled softly. "I didn't mean to sting you, Booth. I was merely trying to explain the physiological mechanisms of your responses. And I love you, too."

Oooooooooo

Booth gritted his teeth as he pulled into the parking lot of the assisted living center. He'd been shot at, kidnapped, almost drowned, arrested and imprisoned unjustly, been separated from his family on more than one occasion and had lost his brother...but in some ways, this was going to be one of the hardest things he'd ever faced in his life. He'd long ago adjusted to the fact that he and his mother would never have a normal relationship, and while it hurt that they weren't closer, he'd accepted it and moved on. This was different...he had to readjust. Reggie had asked him to visit his mother, and Booth found himself wishing once again that things had been different with her...but he knew he couldn't change the past. The best thing is to try to deal with the present, and not think about the past or the future, he thought. I wonder how Reggie's gonna feel about things. He must know how I feel...he knows my mom left me and Jared behind to start a new life with him. He must know I'm still angry and bitter about that...I gotta get over that, though…

Booth waved to Reggie, who was sitting on a bench outside the front door of the care center. "Hey, Reggie." Christ...this is so awkward… Booth raised his eyes skyward, silently asking for help, before continuing with a sheepish expression. "Listen, about last night...I'm sorry I couldn't stay and say thanks for the dinner. It was nice spending time with Melinda and Dan…"

Reggie rose from the bench to shake Booth's hand. "I'm sorry, too, Seeley. I wanted to get back to the table before you left, but I had to go compose myself in my dressing room...I was in no condition to be seen in public after singing that song…"

"What? I don't understand…" Booth gave Reggie a sideways glance, trying to see if the older man was teasing him.

Reggie sighed and inhaled deeply before he could continue. "I've played that song hundreds of times, and it wasn't a problem. I remember trying many times to convince your mom to add it to her repertoire because it's the right kind of song for her voice, but she refused...she said she loved it but it bothered her to sing it, although she never told me why. It's never upset me to play it before, but last night, it hit me...your mom probably won't even remember that tune anymore...she loved music so much and she can't remember most of it anymore...music gave her such joy, and now that's gone…" Reggie ran his hand across his eyes, trying to wipe away his tears.

Swallowing his own tears, Booth put his arm around the older man's shoulders. "I know. Bones says that music can trigger a need in people to release emotional stress, and crying does that. I've often experienced that myself."

"Anyway, when I finally got back to the table, Melinda said you'd had to leave because you weren't feeling well…"

"Yeah. I was real tired, and to tell the truth, I got really emotional, too, and I had to get out of there. That song has lots of good and bad memories attached to it for me." Booth exhaled, finally feeling as if a burden was being lifted. "I don't want Dan and Melinda to feel like I was angry with them, or that I don't want to be a part of a family with them, because I do. I feel really stupid because they brought me stuff from my mom, and I left it there at the restaurant…"

"Melinda gave me the envelope and the album last night since she knew I'd see you this morning. Those things are in my car, and you can get them before you leave this afternoon. They understood, Seeley. They don't know everything that happened between you and your mom, because I decided that wasn't really any of their business, but they know you two were estranged from each other. If you ever decide to tell Melinda and Dan what happened between you and your mom, I'll support you, but if not, that's fine, too. I know your mom left you and your brother in a bad situation with your dad. I really can't defend her on that, but I love her, warts, bad decisions, and all. I have for a long time…no matter what she did in her past, I've always loved her..."

"I appreciate that, Reggie. It's gonna take a while before I can figure out what to tell Dan and Melinda, if anything. After all these years, it's still hard for me. Sometimes I still struggle with guilt, feeling like her leaving was my fault, even though I know better now. Maybe if we can talk about my mom from time to time, I can find out more about what she was thinking, and I can deal with it better….that is, if you don't mind. I don't want to make things worse for you…"

"Actually, Seeley, I think I'd like to talk to you about my time with your mother. There are a lot of things about those years you might want to know…" Reggie nodded as they moved toward the front door of the care center. "But right now, we'd better go see the center's director. She's going to give you a tour of the place before we see Marianne...you know, so you know what kind of care and treatment Marianne's going to have."

"Good idea." Booth paused before they entered. "Thanks, Reggie, for everything you're doing for my mom...and for me."