Note: Firstly, thank you for reading / reviewing! It's such a nonsense, light, fluffy little story so I'm just extremely grateful. Secondly, I want to take this opportunity to let you know that, unless convinced otherwise by some higher power, this series of drabbles will reach no longer than 15 chapters. We still have a way to go, but it's already more than halfway written.
Any feedback, thoughts, or comments are always appreciated (and probably well-needed!). And yes, the last chapter will be on the Badgerfrog Kiss (whatever that is). Enjoy!
Chapter Four
Damn That Girl, She's Scandalous
With one smooth wave, he was down on the ground, eating dirt, once again. He growled and threw her an angry look, although he knew it was futile.
"We can't steal someone's food," she said crossing her arms.
"Why not?" demanded Zuko.
"Because you're stealing someone's food!" she said incredulously as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. "You can't take what's not yours, Your Highness. That's wrong."
"You take things all the time!"
"When you take things from people you know, it's not stealing. It's called mooching. And the law clearly states that mooching off friends is completely acceptable."
"Argh!" He picked himself up and dusted his clothing. "You're beginning to sound like a certain uncle I used to travel with."
"Your uncle is a lot more fun to have around. He plays the Tsungj horn and sings songs, and you do nothing but gripe."
"What? Do you want me to sing all day?" he asked.
"And make my ears bleed? No thanks. But, you could lighten up a bit."
Zuko sighed. There was no use fighting. "Fine then. What do you suggest we do?"
Ten minutes and half a dozen arguments later…
"Toph?"
"Shut up."
"We can't steal someone's food, but we can scam them?"
"I said be quiet!"
"Toph, how is this plan any different from mine?"
"My plans work."
The door finally creaked open. A middle-aged woman answered with a concerned look on her face. "May I help you?"
"I'm so sorry to bother you, Madame," said Zuko sheepishly. He was struggling to keep Toph from crashing to the ground. Her arms were wrapped around his neck, and she was moaning and looking as sick as she possibly could. "But, do you think you could spare some food?"
"Oh my… Is she—"
"Yes. Yes… you see, my wife here is gravely ill and extremely blind—a really horrible combination…" He trailed off suddenly realizing he said wife instead of sister like they had rehearsed it. He tried to recover. "Madame, we would be grateful for any scraps you may have left. We haven't eaten anything all day. Funny story, actually, just earlier she said, honey, don't turn me into five-course meal, like I was going to eat her or something! Not that I wouldn't, I'm sure she's very delicious, I mean…"
Ugh. This was not going well, Zuko thought. He took a deep breath. He was talking too much.
"We're very hungry." Plain and simple. He topped it off with his most pathetic smile.
Two roast rooster-pigs and an apple pie later…
"Wife?"
"Shut up."
