"That's it, we're going, now." River was at the console, flipping switches and inputting coordinates.
The Doctor was instantly at her side, "River, what are you doing?" He was trying to stop her quick moving hands, "We have to figure out what's going on here! I can't do that from," he looked at the monitor, "The Triumgulum Galaxy? What?"
"It's safe, in the middle of nowhere. We can get our bearings."
He squinted at her, a look of disbelief on his face, "River Song doesn't run from anything, even when she should."
"Well, I can't very bloody well go off half cocked anymore can I?" She retorted sharply, "Not when I'm carrying a child! Not when I'm responsible for the life of another being you selfish dolt!"
He swallowed the smart retort he was about to make as he saw tears at the corner of her eyes. Instead, he put an arm around her and stroked her cheek tenderly with the other, making Clara feel like a voyeur; she'd never seen the couple interact and now as she watched River melt into him, it became clear to her that she had never stood a chance against this kind of love.
"River, you're right, it's been a very long time since I've had to think like a father, I'm sorry. Are you scared?"
She swiped at the angry tears brimming in her eyes, but wouldn't meet his gaze, "Of course I'm bloody scared!"
The Doctor studied his wife, the way she couldn't look him in the eye sent a chill through him, "River, you know something don't you?" She pushed past him and a stunned Clara, and headed for their bedroom.
The Doctor followed his wife through their room and into her massive closet. "What are you doing River?" She'd gone to the very back of the room and was pulling open the two deadlocked doors at the back; her arsenal.
"Exactly what it looks like. I may be pregnant but I can still shoot and I'll be damned if I'm not ready for whatever is coming for us."
He grabbed her shoulders and gently shook her, "River, stop. You need to tell me what you know. What is coming for us?"
She broke free from his grasp and slid to floor; the fight gone from her in the face of the Doctor finding out what she'd done. She was crying in earnest now, sobs that broke the Doctor's hearts and turned his blood cold. His voice was a whisper as he knelt beside her, "What have you done River?"
The green eyes that met his were blazing, filled with rage and sorrow. "You left me," she spoke through clenched teeth, her voice low and steady, "You left me. Over a thousand years in hell, waiting for you."
He could feel his own tears pricking at his eyes now. He'd always known she blamed him, and how could she not, but to hear her speak those words to him now, after the past month had been bliss, when all that darkness seemed behind them. "Please, you have to understand, I didn't know you then, when I uploaded you to the mainframe, I didn't know. I thought I was giving you all of time and space."
"And what is all of time and space for me without you, my love? And then Trenzalor; you selfish fool. Did you think you were doing me a kindness; all you did was make the hurt deeper, show me again what I was without." Her hand brushed at the thick fringe of his hair and her eyes turned tender and soft, "I would have done anything to get to you." She'd always been vague with him in the years since her escape from the Library; always covered up her explanation with 'spoilers' and kisses. It would seem she could keep him in the dark no longer.
"What did you do River?" He asked, terrified of the possibilities.
"You know, there are times when I hate you for loving me. When I hate you for making me fight my true nature; for making me want to be good."
"Oh River, River," he took her face between his hands and pressed a kiss to her forehead, "There is so much goodness in you, you've just never believed it."
"You were always there to believe for me, but you'd been gone for so long, and I was so tired of trying."
"Please, you have to tell me what's going on," he said quietly as he pulled her into his arms.
"You'll hate me, I don't think I can take that right now. If it was just me," a pained groan broke from her, "Oh, god what have I done? I should have left. I was going to, but then the baby," she was sobbing again, soaking the purple tweed of his coat, "we need you. I can't do this on my own."
"My love, my brave River Song, you once killed me and do you remember what I told you, that first time you met me?"
"That I was forgiven, always and completely."
"Yeah, that's right," he said and brushed at the tears streaking her face. The Doctor had only seen his wife look at him the way she was looking at him now once before, back on a beach in Utah when she thought she was about to kill him. There was no hope in her eyes, only terror and grief.
"I freed the Master. I freed the Master and then I killed them all."
