Catch 4
"Tetsu…" Hijikata called. He stared at Tetsu, who in return appeared to be staring back at the vice-commander. "Tetsu… oi…" Hijikata tried again, no response. He snapped at the lack of movement and grabbed his lighter. He calmed himself a bit after gripping the lighter and tried again. "Tetsu? Are you paying attention?" No response, so he threw the lighter hitting his assistant right in the face.
"AH! Ouch!" Tetsu finally spoke, nearly a scream. He faced Hijikata and appeared like he had just woken up from a dream. "Hi-Hijikata-san! Ah… I'm so sorry" He bowed. "…is there anything I can do for you?"
Hijikata stared at him for a minute, noticing a sweat drop from his assistant's already shiny chubby cheek. Hijikata sighed and straightened pieces of paper together and handed them to Tetsu. "Here, give this to Kondo-san and wait for me at the entrance right after… we're going out to patrol the area a bit…" He ordered. "Yes!" Tetsu complied and stood up straight after grabbing the pieces of paper. Without looking back he slides the door open, exits, bows, and slides the door close.
Hijikata only stared at how stiff his assistant was being. What was that about? Hijikata then stood up and approached his closet to get ready to patrol the area. He opened his closet and took out his jacket, putting it on swiftly. He went outside his room and took out a stick of cigarette, placing it on his mouth as he grabbed his lighter. He lights it with no problem, inhaling deeply, removing the stick from his mouth and exhaling the smoke. He puts it back in his mouth right after.
While he did all those… a number of eyes were scanning him thoroughly. "…so what do you think?"
"It's impossible…"
"but if you think about it closely, has Hijikata-san ever…"
"That doesn't mean he really is…"
"but if it were true… wouldn't that be a bit…"
"I know, to think we all bathed together before…"
"don't be ridiculous, even if he were, there's no way he'd think that way toward an ugly beast like you…"
"haha… I see, nothing to be worried about, wait! What do you mean by ugly beast? You Bastard!"
"Oi, don't shout he'll hear us!"
"Ah… you shouted too!"
"You assholes, keep it quiet!"
"Wait, I think something just poked me… was that a flashlight?"
"Eh? Why? How'd it feel?"
"Hard and long… a bit thin…"
"EEEEEEEEEEEEEH? OI! IS ONE OF US HAVING A BONER HERE?"
"AH-"
"What are you assholes doing?" Hijikata asked, no wonder it seemed too quiet. A group of Shinsengumi members, were hiding in the bushes outside of Hijikata's room. "ah- Hijikata-san this isn't-" One tried to explain. "Oi, oi, before that who the hell was the one who had a stiffy?" Another one shouted, scared. "Stiffy?" Hijikata asked. None of the group answered, they all just acted, stiff. "What are you-" Hijikata tried to ask. "That's it! You see, Hijikata-san, we're testing how long we can hold being stiff!" another one explained. Yes, depending on Hijikata-san's interest in a stiffy, we'll know for sure if he really is what we think, the member thought.
"Being stiff?" Hijikata asked again, completely confused. "Yes! You see… like how soldiers are tested how long they can take the cold… this is like that, it's like a test for being tortured too! Holding yourself back to be stiff!" The entire group tried to get out of trouble. "…riiiiight" Hijikata regretted questioning. "Well… good luck with that I guess…" Hijikata waved them goodbye. What the hell was that about? Wait… being stiff…. Stiff like acting like a rock .Was that what Tetsu was doing earlier?
When Hijikata left the groups' sight their knees gave up and each one of them nearly sighed their souls out. "That was close…" One muttered. "So… who had the boner?" no answer. "Seriously…?" the person who asked continued to be scared. "Hey… why would Hijikata-san go for such a weird excuse?"
"The stiffy we were mentioning was, the boner kind right? He got that right?"
"If he did, and considered it okay to practice… means…"
"…..!"
HE WANTS TO SEE OUR STIFFYS! They all thought.
"Hijikata-san!" Tetsu called out, running toward the man who was waiting for him, already inside the police car. "Sorry for making you wait, the papers were all safely delivered to Kondo-san!" He reported and bowed at the same time, before entering the car in the driver's seat. "…yeah, good work" Hijikata said. "Then, commencing patrol!" Tetsu announced starting the car's engine.
Even in the car, Tetsu was completely stiff. Drops of sweat kept running down his face and he absolutely refused to look at Hijikata, even if he had to look at the side-mirror. Hijikata stared at him hard and sighed. "Tetsu… forget it…" Hijikata said, stopping the silence inside the car. Stopping the car, Tetsu thought Hijikata meant to forget about the patrol. "Is there anything wrong?" Tetsu asked, not looking at Hijikata still. "Forget about… that whole stiffy thing…" Hijikata said, still thinking that a stiffy meant acting stiff like a rock.
Tetsu looked shocked at this and looked at Hijikata for a second before adverting his eyes again quickly. "Sti- I don't have a stiffy, sir" Tetsu said. "I'm saying you should just let it go, it's just acting stiffy right? Do it later again, for now just release that mind of yours from that stiffy testing or whatever…." Hijikata said, not knowing what Tetsu understood from his words.
"Hi-Hijikata-san… I… release… my stiffy…" Tetsu couldn't believe it. "Yeah, yeah release it already…" Hijikata insisted. "I can't do it!" Tetsu declared, seriously looking at Hijikata. Hijikata looked at him with a face asking why. Hijikata-san wants me to release my stiffy?! Even in broad daylight? Wait that isn't the problem! He wants to see my stiffy? Why? Would he compare it with the boss's stiffy? I can't match up to that! I saw it! It was huge! I had no idea how it was going to go in! And the boss's is definitely stronger than me! Hijikata-san will just laugh at me for sure! I can't show it to him knowing he had already seen one that's so amazing! Tetsu imagined an image of Gintoki's crotch gleaming golden, while the owner had the most annoying grin in his face and a long nose while holding a love-struck Hijikata, which was making beautiful eyes at Gintoki's heavenly crotch. (Author: I want to draw this XDDDD)
"I can't do it! Unless you tell me that I have a chance and that I can be stronger than the boss then I can't!" Tetsu declared more seriously. Unless I'm sure he'll accept me, not out of pity, not because he's a slut, wait, Hijikata-san is no slut! But it'd be pretty hot if he were… wait! Stop thinking about it or my stiffy will burst! What was I thinking about? Oh! Unless Hijikata-san can throw the Boss in the garbage or in the middle of a shark infested ocean! Tetsu thought, already imagining Gintoki's death.
"Tetsu… what's with that? You don't need me to tell you all that, bastard…" Hijikata said, taking the declaration seriously. That's how serious he is about this testing? What's with that? Well, if he's that serious…. Plus what he said just now, he wants to be stronger that Gintoki… How will practicing to be stiff be helpful in getting stronger than that guy? "If you want to be stronger than that guy… you don't have the time to think that you don't have a chance or can't do it…" Hijikata said.
"Start the car; we need to finish this the patrol…" Hijikata ended the conversation there, thinking it'd be best to leave Tetsu to think of what to do to be stronger. Hijikata-san… Tetsu thought, admiring the man all over again as well as envying the boss more extremely. While on patrol, Tetsu had a completely determined face.
"One Gintoki-special please!" Gintoki ordered, obviously already a regular at the small diner. "Ah! Welcome, Gin-san, one Gintoki-special coming up!" The new owner greeted, it was a relative of the previous owner who died, with an awesome funeral, and he had continued the business and chatted a lot with the shop's regulars. Eventually he got the used to everyone and nearly appeared to be the previous owner only younger.
Gintoki sat at his usually seat. He stares as the man next to him slurped up the soba into his mouth. The man chews the soba and gulps it all down. The man looks back at him. Gintoki smirks. "You have something on your face…" Gintoki mentioned, even though there was nothing. He lifts up his hand to the person's face, Gintoki's finger rubbed against the side of the man's mouth. Gintoki had the urge to put his finger inside those lips but was able to retreat his hand, reluctantly. "I don't think there was anything in my face, but thanks…" Hijikata said, seemed like he wasn't bothered by the show, there weren't many people there and the owner was in the kitchen.
"Eh? There really was something, you really are messy when you eat… like letting it trail down from your lips even when I say you have to swallow all of it…" Gintoki teased. Hijikata, knowing full well what the other was thinking, continued eating, faster. "Ah.. Hijikata-kun? You'll choke if you-" Gintoki tried to stop him, but it was too late. "Owner! Thanks for today; I'll leave my pay here… then…" Hijikata placed the money on the table and stood up. "Ah! Thanks again for coming, Hijikata-san" the owner said, popping out of the kitchen.
"Hi-Hijikata-kun? Wait…" Gintoki said in a panic, standing up as well. "What?" Hijikata asked, Gintoki had blocked his way toward the exit anyway. "…no dessert?" Gintoki asked, smirking with furrowed eyebrows. Hijikata sighed. "Well… I want to but… It might turn me messy… right?" Hijikata said, trying to make Gintoki feel a bit guilty for teasing him, he always teased him. No… wait, turn me messy…? Hijikata thought. Hijikata realized how Gintoki would understand what he said and looked at Gintoki. He looked shocked as well.
He would turn messy… that could mean a lot of things, but… but the kind of messy Hijikata… one covered in… and completely engrossed in… losing himself so much… the dessert being… Gintoki thought, a trickle of blood appearing from him nose. Hijikata saw it and panicked. "Wait! That's not it! There's no way I'd be mes- no, wait… I'm not a mes-… I don't… Ugh… I mean dessert right? Ice cream, cream puffs, whip cream… wait…ah…" Hijikata tried hard, he knew his lover would lose it if Hijikata were to show any small signs that he wanted 'IT'. HE WANTS A CREAMY DESSERT! Gintoki already had a perfect picture in his mind.
"Sorry! Owner, I have to go now!" Gintoki shouted and grabbed Hijikata by the wrist, rushing out. "Wait! Oi!" Hijikata tried. "Geez… Toushiro… even in front of a lot of people you still love acting like a complete tease…" Gintoki said walking fast toward their usual motel. "Me? A tease? You're the tease!" Hijikata argued. "See? You're being a tease now, damn you tsunderes… You seeing me as a tease is like, you getting affected by everything I do, even though you don't show it! You're more of a tease!" Gintoki replied. They entered the motel and took the familiar room.
"Wa-wait! This author can't write smut yet!" Hijikata protested. "…WHAAAAT? Crappy author this is what the readers want you know! And haven't you already read and watched and reread and rewatched a heck lot of yaoi porn? Don't act all innocent now damn it!" Gintoki yelled.
"Wait- Ah!" Hijikata felt the hands already freeing him off his clothes. "See? You can do it…" Gintoki smirked as he removed everything that was covering Hijikata's luscious body. "Ngggh…" Hijikata moaned. Throwing the clothes in the floor and admiring the sight of Hijikata, completely naked below him, Gintoki leaned down to kiss his meal in the lips as he undressed himself, gaining assistance as Hijikata unbuckled the man's belt. Gintoki smirks from the action. They both moaned as their tongues started a dance for dominance, both wanting to explore the others mouth.
Gintoki unwillingly broke the kiss to take off his top. As Gintoki stretched his hands up to take it off, Hijikata sat up enough to kiss the man's chest, seeing Gintoki's already unzipped pants, Hijikata leans toward it. He takes the opportunity to free Gintoki's throbbing cock.
"Hey, Shinpachi, why are we in this chapter?" Kagura asked. "Well, the author wouldn't be able to finish this if she continued with the smut, she kept face palming and cringing after the **** part" Shinpachi explained. "I see… what a weak author…" Kagura commented.
*knock* *knock* "Excuse me… Kin-san? Are you there?" a familiar voice called out.
Author: …..sorry, but definitely….. before this ends I will…. Definitely somehow…. Somehow…. My fingers are soooooo cold right now…. Why …why ….why rnlrlkewjwklejklwe hope you enjoyed, chars. Aren't mine…. Till next time, thanks for faves, follows, reviews~ thanks that you think it's interesting, here's the 4rth chapter, and once my hand recovers I shall probably continue with next chapter, that's how excited I am for this aha… okay.. sorry again~
