Chapter 4
MELODIE4894 – thanks so much for all your help with the storyline of this chapter without you it would be kinda crappy so thanks and much love x
This chapter is a mixture of angst and fluff and drama.
There is swearing…but it's rated M so you shouldn't be surprised really. And it's Jim kirk; he just IS sweary so deal with it.
Hope this is ok
The two boys followed Amanda into the living room, whilst Spock wondered to himself about what had caused Jim to have the worried look on his face.
Amanda and Thomas shared a knowing look as she and the boys seated themselves on the sofa in the living room. He raised his eyebrows at his sister and smiled at Spock, who was stroking a blonde tendril away from Jim's forehead as his lips twitched upwards.
The silence that filled the room as the four of them drank was a rather awkward one. Everyone knew what had occurred between Spock and Jim the night before, and it seemed to hang over them as they sipped at the teacups.
"Mother, I would like to ask you whether you would permit me to spend the rest of the day in Jim's company."
Spock said into the heavy silence. Jim looked at him and smiled. He really hoped that Amanda would say yes.
"Of course you can baby; just don't get home too late and don't get up to anything dangerous."
Amanda replied, patting Spock's knee lightly. She pointedly looked at Jim, who nodded minutely to reassure her.
"Nothing dangerous I promise; we will just be messing about at the farmhouse…uh…and by messing about I don't mean anything sexual…not that you might've thought…but I just wanted make it clear that…just, you know feeding the horses and chickens and hanging out with my mum and my brother…perfectly innocent honestly."
Jim blurted out, turning a deep shade of red and face-palming as Spock turned to him with a beautiful eyebrow raised.
Amanda and Thomas were both laughing quietly as Jim clamped his mouth shut and resigned himself to embarrassment.
"Don't worry kiddo, I trust that you will look after my boy; you've done a pretty good job of it so far. I haven't seen him this happy in weeks. You boys have fun today ok?"
Amanda replied, still smiling as she took Jim and Spock's empty teacups and herded them out into the garden.
"Thank you, Mother. I appreciate the trust you are giving me and Jim. He is a close friend of mine and I am thankful that you approve of me spending time with him."
Spock said, as his mother pulled him into a gentle hug. She smiled and waved as the two boys made their way down the path and back onto the street.
"See you later Spock."
Amanda called from the front door. Her brother had now joined her and was also waving jovially at them.
The human and the Vulcan walked quickly back to Jim's house, occasionally talking but mainly in a pleasant silence. Jim's worry seemed to have subsided, as he was now relaxed and smiling widely. Spock never did find out the reason he had been so tense, but it didn't matter now anyway. The warning Amanda had given Jim still rang out in his head:
"If you so much as think about hurting him you can't even imagine the things I will do to you".
With this thought in his mind he entangled his fingers with Spock's and pulled him into his side. Spock raised an eyebrow, but settled into the embrace by wrapping an arm around Jim's back and resting it on his hipbone. He couldn't even contemplate hurting the beautiful Vulcan; and therefore his need to worry about how Amanda would butcher him if he did floated out of his mind. Everything was going to be ok.
When Spock and Jim arrived back at the farmhouse they could hear Sam shouting happily from the back yard.
"Come on Spock; let's go see what the hell my idiot brother is doing."
Jim said, turning to go through the red gate and smiling at his Vulcan companion.
Jim waved at his mum through the kitchen window as he and Spock walked around the side of the house.
Spock was surprised by the sight that met his dark eyes. There was a wooden shed with a tiny doorway at the bottom, to one side of the large back garden and scattered about the yard were a dozen red and brown fat-looking birds. The rest of the yard was taken up with a large wooden stable. Spock could see that there were two animals inside of the wooden building, and one that was currently being ridden around the garden by Jim's older brother Sam.
The animals were large and majestic, with strong leg muscles, tan and auburn coloured fur and dark manes that ran down the back of their muscular necks. They had long narrow faces with wide nostrils and large teeth. Their dark eyes were beady and glistening, sitting either side of their angular skulls. Spock recognised them as horses; he had heard his mother describe them to him once; she told him all about how when she was a child she used to ride horses on the weekends.
Spock was shaken out of his shocked reverie when a cool hand slipped into one of his warm ones. He looked around to see Jim standing next to him, head cocked to one side with a large grin spread over his tanned features.
"Uh…this is the Kirk farm I guess…do you like it Spock?"
Jim announced, gesturing widely with his free hand and looking nervously at Spock. The insecurity was clearly flaring up in Jim again. Spock knew he had to rectify it.
"It is most fascinating Jim."
Spock replied, intertwining his fingers with the human's and allowing his lips to twitch upwards.
Jim chuckled lightly and turned to kiss Spock full on the mouth. The Vulcan responded easily and quickly, stroking warm fingers up and down Jim's tattered t-shirt. Jim broke the kiss and looked around to see where his brother was, he heard the horse's hooves clacking on the gravel behind the stable and turned back to Spock with his eyebrows raised. Before Jim could make any sort of move Spock was pushing him against the stable door and kissing him hard, his tongue exploring every inch of the human's mouth.
Spock placed his hands firmly on Jim's hips and moved one of his legs between the jeaned legs. He pushed them apart with more force than he intended, this caused the stable door to fall open; both boys fell with it. Jim and Spock lay in a heap on the hay-covered stable floor. The horses didn't seem to have noticed the interruption so carried nuzzling their mouths at the hay and whinnying happily.
Jim took the moment of silence and realisation on Spock's part to take control of the action. He flipped them over so that he was straddling a blushing Spock, their narrow hips grinding together pleasantly.
"What the fuck is going on here, Jimmy?"
Sam said from the doorway of the stable. He was chuckling down at his brother, as he un-straddled the palomino horse and stood with his hands on his hips. Spock blushed dark green and attempted to move beneath the writhing human who was still sitting atop him, smirking as his blue eyes flashed with mirth.
"Hey bro, you remember Spock right? I was just showing him around the farm."
Jim answered, finally getting up off of Spock's lap and reaching a hand down towards the Vulcan.
"Yeah I remember him, he's the one from the skating rink right?"
Sam asked, raising a caramel eyebrow at his brother, the wide grin still present on his face. Jim nodded, a permanent flush now on his cheeks. He hugged Spock into his side and smiled up at him. Spock blushed also, but returned the smile.
"Looks to me like the only 'showing around' you've been doing is of the stable floor there Jimmy."
Sam retorted, slapping his brother on the arm playfully. Jim just blushed darker as Spock looked vehemently at the floor.
"Uh…yeah…anyway have you fed the horses and the chickens yet?"
Jim asked, watching as his brother absentmindedly stroked the horse's auburn neck with his fingertips.
"Well, no I haven't fed them because mum said that it was your turn this week Jim…and now you've got a second pair of hands you will get it done twice as quickly."
Sam said, putting on his best 'talking like a kid' voice.
"Ok then, we'll feed them, but you said you were gonna brush the horses and sweep out the coop if I didn't tell mum that you slept with Jack Rawlings…remember?"
Jim replied, raising an eyebrow and smirking evilly.
"Jim! Ssh! Mum is just inside. Yeah 'course I remember. You get to work feeding the horses and I will sweep the coop; just keep your little mouth shut about me sleeping with You Know Who ok?"
Sam whispered, looking over his shoulder at the house, listening to Winona singing quietly, making sure she hadn't heard what he and Jim were talking about.
Sam picked up the brush from the place where it was leaning against the back door, and walked away from the boys towards the chicken coop, muttering about 'stupid big mouth brothers'
"Is Jack Rawlings a male human?"
Spock asked, as Jim handed him a bucket of yellow coloured grain and walked into the kitchen. He returned moments later holding up two aprons. Spock raised an eyebrow at Jim, who rushed towards him and looped the apron over his head, brushing a pointed ear slightly with a fingertip as he did so.
"Yeah, he is a guy. He's my Mum's best friend's son; hence why Mum can't know about it. His family are all Roman Catholic, suffice to say he doesn't follow the teachings about not being homosexual that well. Thanks to my big brother. Total bargaining tool though; whenever I want Sam to do something for me I just mention Catholic Jack and I can get him to do anything."
Jim said, tying his own apron up in a bow before moving towards Spock, who seemed to be having trouble with his garment.
Jim took pity on the Vulcan; he wrapped his arms around Spock's back and tied the apron for him. Apparently vulcans are immensely intelligent and logical and scientific yet cannot manage tying up some apron strings. Spock blushed as Jim came closer and closer to his face. He planted a delicate kiss on Spock's lips before nodding and turning towards the grass where the chickens were pecking at the ground hungrily.
"We do not have animals such as these on my home planet."
Spock said, looking curiously down at the chickens. Jim reached into the bucket Spock was still holding and pulled out a handful of grain. He threw the grain onto the grass, smiling when the chickens started pecking furiously.
"Why don't you have a go at feeding them, Spock? I know it's not exactly fun but-"
"No Jim, it is a most enjoyable activity. The animals on Vulcan are not tame or to be kept as pets, therefore the act of feeding your pets is most fascinating to me."
Spock answered, plunging his fingers into the grain and throwing it onto the grass as Jim had done. Jim smiled at him before resuming feeding the chickens.
"Ok, it's the horses next, I'll just go and get the hay and grass; I'll be back in a second."
Jim said, after most of the grain had been distributed. He pecked Spock on the lips and walked away in the direction of the chicken coop. Spock touched his fingers to the place where Jim had kissed him, his lips quirked upwards as he remembered the feeling of the boy's cool mouth upon his. Spock turned to see Jim returning to him, carrying a large hay bale with a bucket balanced on top of it. The Vulcan rushed forwards to relieve Jim of the weight he was carrying.
Spock and Jim dumped the bucket and the hay down in the stable. They could hear Sam singing loudly from the chicken coop as Jim walked towards the horses. Spock did not know how to react to the large powerful animals. He backed himself into the stable wall and stared at Jim as he moved around the horses, stroking them with his tanned hands and whispering quiet words. The horses moved towards him, smelling the hay and grass that the boys had brought.
"Hey babe, don't be scared of them; they won't hurt you. Grab some of the hay and come stand by me. I'll help you feed them, alright?"
Jim said, gesturing to the hay bale and then beckoning Spock with a finger. Spock looked into Jim's warm blue eyes and decided to trust him, as he had done at the roller rink all those hours ago.
Jim watched as Spock moved away from the edge of the stable and came to stand next to him. The human wrapped his arm around Spock's shoulders as he could feel him trembling and hear his hitched breath.
"Just hold out the food for them and they will take it from your hand, nothing to worry about."
Jim whispered, as Spock started to relax a little bit. One of the horses saw the hay in the Vulcan's hand and began to eat it, its lips smacking at the warm hand.
"See? It's not that bad; no danger at all."
Spock felt Jim's whisper against his ear, and a cool hand resting on his hip. Spock turned his head and leaned backwards into the human's body. Jim ran his hand down Spock's arm and entwined their fingers together, resting his chin on the Vulcan's shoulder and sighing happily.
Spock lifted his free hand and stroked the horse's neck. At first it was fine, but then the animal jerked backwards, stamping its hooves into the dusty ground. Jim pulled Spock backwards away from the horse.
"Oh fuck! This isn't good."
Jim said slipping out of the hug and looking into Spock's worried face.
"I apologise Jim, I did not mean to frighten your horse. I think it was the high temperature of my skin that startled it."
Spock responded, his hands were trembling as the horse reared up onto its hind legs, whinnying loudly.
"No babe, don't worry about it, just try to keep out of its way while it's going crazy. I don't want you to get hurt."
Jim called out over the sound of the horse; he had moved to stand to the side of the horse, trying to calm it down. He wasn't having much luck however.
Sam appeared from the chicken coop moments later, a fearsome look on his face.
"What the hell? What spooked her Jimmy?"
Sam shouted worriedly, moving to help Jim try to calm the horse. The other horses were shuffling in what appeared to be fear.
"I dunno, she just started backing away and then she was rearing up and stuff."
Jim said, watching as Spock was backing further and further away from the stable. He noticed that Spock was just about to collide with a trough of very cold water.
"Spock, stop walking backwards, no don't walk anymore you're gonna-
Before Jim could finish his sentence he saw Spock topple backwards into the trough. There was a loud splash and clang as the Vulcan disappeared under the water.
Jim ran forwards and grabbed Spock's hands, pulling him upright and out of the water. He was completely drenched from the knees upwards, drips of water trickling down his head and face and falling onto the dusty floor.
"Oh Spock; you poor thing! I'll go and get you some towels."
Winona said, emerging from the kitchen with an anxious look on her face.
Jim wrapped his arms around the shivering, drenched Vulcan and hugged him tightly; he didn't care if he got soaking wet in the process.
"Spock, are you alright? I didn't realise how close to the water you were. Aw you're absolutely freezing. I'll just see if the horse is ok and then I'll be right back ok?"
Jim said into Spock's wet shoulder. Spock nodded minutely, his teeth chattering with cold
"Y-yes j-Jim, I'm f-f-fine."
Spock managed to say, suppressing a shiver. Jim ran a finger over Spock's wet cheekbone, before he pushed the soaking hair out of the Vulcan's eyes, pecked him on the lips and strode in the direction of his brother.
"Is she alright now, Sam?"
Jim asked, watching the horse shuffling, the wild look still in her eyes.
His brother patted him on the shoulder and smiled.
"Yeah she's fine now, I dunno what came over her though; she's never done that before…maybe she was disgusted by you being all lovey-dovey with Spock? Only kidding buddy. Now go inside and get him warm before he freezes over."
Sam chuckled, ruffling his brother's hair and glancing beyond him towards Spock, who was leaning against the wall of the house, shivering violently.
"Thanks Sam, yeah I need to get him warmed up pretty sharpish don't I? Thanks for the help bro."
Jim replied, smiling sheepishly at his brother and turning back towards his Vulcan companion.
Winona appeared at the door of the house, carrying a large pile of blankets and towels. Jim ran up to her and took them, before vaulting back to Spock and wrapping about five of them hastily around him and over his head. Spock would have protested but he was too cold to care at that moment.
After he was lead inside the farmhouse by a worried and fussing Winona and a no less worried Jim, Spock found himself sitting in the living room in front of a log fire. The blankets and towels were still wrapped around him like a warm cocoon as Jim drew small circles on Spock's covered-up knee. Both boys were sitting cross legged on the carpet, with a cup of hot tea placed next to Spock for him to drink.
Winona left the room and walked into the kitchen, but not before persuading the boys to have some pancakes, as they had missed out on them at breakfast. She ruffled Jim's hair and kissed his forehead as she left the boys alone with their thoughts.
"Here, you should drink this. My mum makes the best cup of tea in the world. It'll warm you up in a second."
Jim handed Spock the dark purple mug and raised it to the Vulcan's lips. Spock wrapped both his hands around the mug, placing his warm fingers over Jim's cooler ones and smiling slightly. He tilted it and poured the hot strong liquid into his mouth. Jim was right; it was the best tea Spock had ever tasted.
"See? Isn't it amazing?"
Jim asked, slipping his hands out from under Spock's and grinning.
"Indeed it is, Jim. I feel infinitely warmer having consumed it. Thank you."
Spock replied, between gulping down more of the heated beverage. Jim was staring into the glowing fire, his hands in front of it to warm them. Spock watched the fire light dance in the human's blue eyes, turning them an amber colour in the semi-dark room. The boy's whole face was lit up and Spock could not fail to see how beautiful Jim was.
"Have you always lived in Iowa?"
Spock asked, breaking the pleasant silence that had settled between them. Jim looked away from the fireplace and back to Spock.
Jim nodded, before lying down on the battered carpet and sighing happily. Spock watched him make himself comfortable, lifting his knees up and removing his shoes, to reveal a pair of fluffy, stripy socks. Spock thought these items of clothing were nothing but adorable, but he didn't say as much; that would be illogical. Not that logic really manifested itself when he was around the enchanting human boy.
"Yeah; I'm an Iowa boy born and bred. Everything I know is here; Sam and mum and the cornfields and the roller-rink, and I dunno how I would react in a different place. That sounds stupid doesn't it? I'm babbling like a kid."
Jim replied, blushing slightly and looking sideways at Spock from his place on the floor. Spock lay down on his side; he rested his heavy, still-damp head on his hand and stared back at Jim.
"It does not sound stupid, Jim. I understand what you are conveying. Being on this planet is such a strange experience for me. Everything is different here; the landscape the earth beneath my feet, the people, the cultures, the sensibilities. I found it most overwhelming on my first visit."
Spock countered, stroking Jim's rounded ear with two fingertips. Jim suppressed a shiver at this action.
"Oh yeah? I guess that when it's compared to other places Earth is pretty mind-blowing."
Jim answered, turning and laying on his side so his body was mirroring Spock's.
"Affirmative. On Vulcan, life is set out differently to that of humans. A child is taught to fend for themselves from a young age. Marriages and careers are arranged by your parents. I have my entire life set out in front of me. I will attend the Vulcan Science Academy if I am accepted."
Spock said, a slight frown appearing on his pale forehead.
"And if you aren't accepted to this Academy place?"
Jim asked, raising his blonde eyebrows in curiosity. Spock's frown increased threefold at this question, a hurt look flashing across his chocolate eyes. Jim reached out and entwined his hand with Spock's.
"I'm sorry. You don't have to tell me Spock. I won't mind. I'm being too intrusive aren't I? Just tell me to bugger off if you don't wanna say."
He turned to look at Spock apologetically. If the Vulcan didn't wanna tell him then he was OK with that.
"I am not upset by the fact that you asked me the question. The reason I am upset is the answer to the enquiry. If I were not accepted into the Vulcan Science Academy then I would be driven into an arranged marriage with a Vulcan woman who I have never met and do not love."
Spock replied, staring into Jim's blue eyes and searching for a response. The shocked look on the human's face was the reaction he had been expecting.
"So you either go to school at this Academy or you get married? Isn't there an option where you can choose your own path? Like, can't you just rebel against it all and, oh I dunno, join Starfleet or something?"
Jim asked, trying to keep the incredulity from his voice. He felt a massive amount of sympathy for Spock; he apparently had a very limited life path to follow; marriage or academy.
"There is not really an option of rebellion Jim, although I believe that for some vulcans-" Spock failed to mention that he fit into that particular group "-would greatly appreciate the third, freer option of choosing your own destiny, rather than having it decided before you are even born."
Jim could sense the bitterness that was seeping into his companion's words. Spock didn't have to say that he was within the group of vulcans who were screaming out for rebellion and freedom; Jim already knew he was in it.
"I can't imagine anything that restrictive in my life. I feel awful for bemoaning how I've been used an abused by everyone I've ever been fucked by, when you've got serious shit like that trapping you all the time."
Jim looked into Spock's face, hoping he didn't judge him like everyone else did.
"Obviously, when I said everyone I've ever been fucked by, I was excluding you from that horrific selection of renegades, rebels, rockers, punks and pretty boys, oh and a couple of girls too. Just so you know that I don't think you've used and abused me."
Jim amended quickly, in response to a hurt look that he saw flicker and disappear in Spock's eyes.
He sat up, hugging his knees to his chest; fear engulfed him as memories of past sexual encounters swam in his head and settled miserably for him to replay like a projection of all his failed attempts at love, whereas they were blinded by rampant, angry and feral lust. He had always hoped that once, just once, one of them might actually love him. How fucking stupid of him. How naïve.
"So that is the reason for your unfounded insecurity? Your low self esteem stems from a string of failed sexual encounters? If you will permit me to ask, I wish to know who first caused you to feel this way."
Spock asked cautiously, voice quiet and guarded, as if he was worried he might cause Jim to start crying and never stop. This is how Jim felt when he remembered the first time. The very first time; he was so young, so stupid and immature.
"Yeah, if you were to research me, all you would find were scattered remnants of all my failed 'encounters'. The first one? The one that broke my virgin teenaged heart? Robbie Anderson."
Jim said, not looking anywhere but into Spock's caring, concerned face. The dark slanted eyebrows were drawn together and his pale lips were slightly parted. He had never told anyone about Robbie Anderson. No-one knew his secret; the tale of how his virginity was so roughly taken from him. And he was about to finally let go of the memory.
"I was 14 years old. He was staying at our house in my brother's room with a group of friends. He had been friends with Sam for years, so I knew him, I had seen him, spent time with him, talked to him. I had fallen head over fucking heels in love with him. Stupid little Jimmy Kirk. So when he came into my room that night, interrupting me from doing a last minute school project, I jumped at the chance to be within his arms and feel his lips against mine."
Jim said, watching as Spock sat cross legged across from him, his hand upon the human's shaking hand. The human took a deep breath, suppressed the tears that were inevitable, and carried on with the story.
"Then it all went wrong. He was kissing me, hard on the mouth; I had been kissed before, but never like that. His tongue was deep in my mouth and he was biting at my lip. Inside I was singing out. But then it happened."
Jim stopped again, closing his eyes for a few seconds. Spock stroked his cheekbone with a damp fingertip, urging him onwards. Jim leant into the warmth, biting his lip in embarrassment.
"Spock, just don't judge me okay? I was young and stupid."
Before Jim could hear Spock's response the Vulcan lips were on his for what seemed like the hundredth time, his rough tongue licking at Jim's full lips; calming him and giving him strength he didn't know he possessed.
"I could not make any judgement upon you James, to do so would be a betrayal of your feelings, a crime I would never wish to commit."
Spock whispered, grasping the back of Jim's head and running his fingers through the soft blonde hair soothingly.
"Thanks, it's good to know that someone honest is sticking around for once. Anyway back to Robbie. The next thing I knew he was pushing down on my shoulders, forcing me into a kneeling position in front of him. He unzipped his jeans and…well yeah I think you know what happened next. I had to swallow; he made me swallow every drop of it. I wanted to cry, I wanted to vomit. It tasted vile, it hurt my throat. I was fucking 14 Spock!"
Jim burst out, tears finally spilling down his flushed pink cheeks, his voice cracking and his breath coming out ragged and dry. Spock edged forwards and hugged him tightly, allowing the human to cry wordlessly on his shoulder.
"It sh-shouldn't have h-happened! I w-was so stupid. I let him fuck me. I remember him saying "get on your hands and knees for me kid; I'm gonna r-rock your fucking world" and then he pressed into me, h-hard and fast and painful. I remember the b-bloodied sheets, I remember the burning pain. I remember the moment it was over, he turned to me and said "th-thanks for the fuck darling; it's our little secret though." And then he walked out."
Jim was still heaving on Spock's shoulder, his chest felt tight and his eyes stung. But he didn't care. He trusted Spock. He had finally divulged his hidden past. The reason he didn't trust anyone, the reason he was so insecure. Robbie-fucking-Anderson. The bastard.
"That sounds like an awful experience Jim. I can understand why it has mentally and emotionally scarred you for most of your teenage years. I am sorry that I have upset you by asking you to recall it for me. We do not have to speak anymore if you do not wish to."
Spock broached, wiping a tear away from Jim's jaw as the human edged away from Spock a fraction.
"Thank you Spock; I have never told anybody that before. I am glad that it is finally out of my head. You have no idea the effect that memory has on me. Every time I'm with someone, fucking them, I see his cruel contorted face and it makes me wanna cry and scream and run and hide forever."
Jim retorted, sighing and hugging Spock to him tightly. Spock held tightly to Jim's ribs, running his fingers over them absentmindedly.
"I am glad that you trust me enough to be able to divulge your secrets to me."
Spock spoke softly into Jim's rounded ear. Jim placed a delicate kiss to Spock's cheek, before letting go of him and sitting cross legged on the carpet, staring intently into the beautiful dark eyes.
"I really like you; you are unlike anyone I have ever met before. Makes a refreshing change to have someone here with me, just in the farmhouse with Sam and mum and everything, just hanging out and getting to know me. Other people never stick around to find out anything other than the size of my dick of the colour of my bedroom ceiling. So thanks. Again. I guess I should stop thanking you or you're gonna start throwing stuff at me right?"
Jim chuckled, fiddling with the now empty mug that still sat on the rug.
"no Jim, I will not start throwing objects at you. I care about you and I have enjoyed finding out about your family and your home and your life. The only thing I would've done differently would be to not fall into the freezing cold water."
Spock's lips twitched into a genuine smile. Jim sniffled loudly but erupted into raucous laughter at Spock's comment.
"Yeah, but you got to have my mum's amazing tea, and to sit here all wrapped up in blankets and sit by the fire and everything. Maybe it wasn't all bad. And your starting to warm back up anyway. Or so I can tell from the heat of your lips and your hands on me."
Jim blushed lightly, but carried on smiling at Spock.
Just then Winona walked into the room, carrying a tray with a large plate of freshly cooked pancakes and four cups of steaming tea.
"Pancakes and tea; the perfect remedy for falling in a trough of water and crying your heart out.
Winona said, looking from Spock to Jim. She placed the tray on the coffee table and stooped down to kneel in front of Jim.
"I'm sorry honey, but I couldn't help overhearing what you said; about Robbie and what he did to you."
She whispered, as she held onto Jim's shoulders lightly. He blushed and swore to himself.
"You should've told me jimmy, I could have done something, could have banished him from the house or warned Sam away from him. I'm sorry that he treated you like that; that he hurt you and made you do things you were too young to understand. The fucking bastard! I'm glad he moved to Spain or I would be making my way to his house right now to castrate him or something!"
Winona pulled him into a tight hug, wrapping her warm arms around her little boy. She heard him breathing heavily beside her ear and pulled away, taking his flushed face in her hands and planting a kiss to his forehead.
"Thanks mum. I'm sorry I didn't tell you; I felt like an idiot for letting it happen. I was embarrassed I guess, and I didn't want you or Sam worrying about me. I love you so much."
Jim responded, looking into his mum's pale blue eyes. He heard Sam come in from the garden, humming quietly.
"what's up with my little jimmy? If spock's done something to you I'll kill him."
His brother said looking down at his little family who were both looking sad. Spock blushed but looked affronted at the comment.
"It wasn't Spock, jimmy's just dealing with some difficult stuff from the past; nothing to worry about. Well, nothing pancakes tea and a few good hugs can't solve anyway."
Winona stroked Jim's cheek before moving towards the coffee table. Sam crouched in front of his little brother and surveyed him.
"Well, I'm glad it's not Spock because I was starting to come around to his Vulcan-ness, and I would feel kinda bad having to pound on someone who had been unceremoniously dunked in freezing cold water in the middle of November."
Sam chuckled, wiping a tear away from Jim's cheek. Jim smiled weakly at his older brother. Before Jim could say anything, his brother enveloped him in a strong hug. Jim nestled his head against Sam's warm muscular shoulder.
"It'll be ok little Jiminy, right? The past is just that; in the past. You've just gotta move on. Whatever it is, you've just gotta let go of it and forget it. I can't have you being all sad, coz then I have to hug you all the time; and I think my arms might get a bit tired after hug 107…dontcha think?"
Sam spoke softly to Jim, stroking his fingers over the blonde head that was resting against him.
"Yeah, you're right. Thanks Sam. You're the best big brother ever, you know that?"
Jim said, breaking apart from his brother and smiling up at him.
Spock was watching the little family unit interacting, and smiling fondly at them. He would like to think that if he was upset his family would do something similar for him.
"Come on boys, lets eat and drink up, then I was thinking we could go and check out the fair. What do you sat to that huh? We can all go together, cheer little Jimmy up."
Winona said, patting Sam on the shoulder and gesturing towards the sofa.
Jim turned to Spock and smiled widely, before getting to his feet and holding a hand out for Spock to take. He did so and soon enough all four of them were seated on the sofa together, arms wrapped around each other as they ate the pancakes and drank the tea in a pleasant silence.
Ok so that's another chapter done.
It was so fricking long. Sorry about that guys, but it had a lot to cover so just stick with it.
The next chapter will be them going to the fair and having oodles of fun, after Jim's little depressing admission.
I think also chapter 5 will start to feature stuff about Spock going back to Vulcan; he's only on earth for a week and he will have to leave eventually
Hope this chapter is ok, if a bit huge.
x
