One Piece mega AU

By: FunahoMisaki

(A/N: I own nothing and read last chapter)

"What was that about pirates not having the right to raise a child? I don't recall you having any problem with that when I was raising Dragon practically all by myself." Shakky said her smile dropping as she bit down on her cigarette so hard that it broke and the lit end fell from her mouth in front of Ace. Shakky then jumped from the execution stand after Garp who was running around looking for a place to hide as Shakky let out a rare uncharacteristic angry roar.

"AND YOU DIDN'T THINK TO TELL ME ABOUT OUR SON MAKING US GRANDPARENTS OR THAT OUR GRANDDAUGHTER ADOPTED A BROTHER?! YOU ARE A DEAD IDIOT AND I FORGET WHY I EVEN MARRIED YOU TO BEGIN WITH!"

"Eh?! Shakky's Luffy's baa-chan!?" Luffy shouted shocked after a moment of blinking and causing Hina and Shakky to growl. Luffy should have always known that but thanks to one deluded and very stupid man…she didn't.

"Yes Monkey-chan…or rather…Lu-chan. I'm your grandmother." Shakky said looking over her shoulder at Luffy and giving her a beautiful sad smile that caused many males to blush. She may be a former pirate and likely as old as Garp but when she smiled like that… damn was she beautiful.

"Unfortunately Garp never told me we have a granddaughter…although I recognized who you were to me the first time I saw you…never got the chance to tell you though." Shakky said her smile even sadder at this while many were gaping at the fact that the Marine War Hero had married a woman from Gol D. Roger's crew. Although many did admit that she was pretty hot for an older lady.

"Yay! Luffy has a mother and grandmother!" Luffy cheered happily, grinning widely and happily at this even as she ran forward to try and get to her brother.

"You've always had a mother and grandmother Lu-chan…just because we didn't know you were alive doesn't mean we weren't related." Shakky said looking over and smiling sadly at her granddaughter again. She had missed so much that she should have been there for.

"Luffy never thought about it like that. Baa-chan has a point…Well then it's nice that Luffy finally met Luffy's kaa-chan and baa-chan!" Luffy said beaming happily after she thought about it for a second. That third person crap was really getting on some peoples nerves now.

"Brat! This is a fight! Keep your guard up and socialize when it's over." Dadan said scowling as she used her club to knock back one marine trying to stab Luffy from behind.

"Okay Dadan-kaa!" Luffy chirped as she knocked out five marines who tried attacking the mountain bandit.

"Cheeky brat." Dadan said blushing embarrassed at the looks on the marines faces at what she was called.

"Huh how the hell?" Ace asked when his cuffs suddenly burned away, leaving just ashes and a cigarette…? His head turned towards Shakky confused while she knocked Garp halfway across the base with one punch, causing all the marines to gulp and pale along with quite a few pirates.

"You think I smoke these for fun, Ace-chan? Grandma has a few secrets after all." Shakky said winking at the boy with a small grin on her lips as she lit another cigarette casually.

"Now come on Ace-chan. Let's get you to Edward-chan, wouldn't want anyone else getting hurt now." Shakky said grabbing Ace and easily hoisting him up before vanishing from the platform.

"H-huh?" Ace stumbled looking surprised as he suddenly found himself gently being set down on the ice beside Whiteboard who covered his face with one large hand.

"You still call me that even after all these years Shakky-onee-sama?" Edward asked looking at her rather crossly making her giggle a bit and pat his arm. Everyone looked surprised at the amount of respect and the title that the tall white haired old man gave the woman who was barely a quarter his size.

"If I didn't then you'd think I was an imposter and try to attack me Edward-chan and we wouldn't want to embarrass you in front of your children." Shakky said as the pirates began retreating back to their ships now that they had who they came for. The sad part was that Whitebeard didn't deny that fact.

"Baa-chan is so cool!" Luffy had literal stars in her eyes almost as she near tackled Shakky in a hug. Hina, Dadan, and quite a few others rushing after the straw hat wearing girl who was near wrapped around her grandmother with a beaming grin on her face.

"Thank you baby girl. Now let's get you out of here and get you a warm meal eh?" Shakky asked patting Luffy's head gently as she looked at her fondly, picking the scrawny teen up easily and carrying her to a ship. Shaky didn't really care which one, it wasn't likely that any of the crews would toss her and her grandchild overboard but if they tried…Shakky had ways of dealing with them.

"Food! Come on kaa-chan, Dadan-kaa, baa-chan!" Luffy was like an excited child as she eagerly and impatiently tugged her mother and grandmother towards a ship while Dadan laughed as she boarded Vivi's main ship first.

"Yep she's related to me and Garp." Shakky said giving a small giggle as she let her grandbaby tug her impatiently towards the rope ladder that was thrown down for those who couldn't jump up the side of the boat.

"You pirate cowards think you will be leaving here alive!" Akainu yelled as he tried to attack the three women, wanting to destroy the traitor, remnant of Roger's crew, and Dragons Daughter. The flaring of two fully awakened Haki's, and the flaring of a partially awakened Haki was the only warning he had before the three women turned to him with dangerous looks on their faces as Luffy's stomach growled hungrily.

"Don't try-" Hina scowled as she used her devil fruit to tie the Admiral's legs together with a sea stone cage. The other marines were shocked, they never knew that her cages could be made of sea stone! That made her much more dangerous than anyone thought she could be.

"To keep us-"Luffy slammed the admirals face into the ice with a punch accidentally fused with armament Haki, not that she noticed however some smarter marines and pirates did. Including her mother and grandmother.

"From food!" Shakky sneered as she reared her leg back and kicked Akainu to the other side of the base without Haki.

"Sugoi! Baa-chan is so strong!" Luffy said amazed at how strong her grandmother is as she held a hand over her eyes to try and see how far Akainu went while more than one marine collapsed in disbelief and horror. Garp…had married and procreated with a monster of a woman.

"Actually I've gotten weaker. Twenty years ago that would have sent him a couple of more miles at least… ah…that fat guy with the ugly chest hair absorbed most of the impact it seems." Shakky said a bit upset that her strength had fallen so far while she lived as a bartender, but was amused at how awestruck her granddaughter was… as well as most marines and pirates. Akainu had easily been three times her size if not more after all. If it wasn't for that fat guy with the black beard the Magma Admiral would have went into the sea.

"Sugoi!" Luffy said wide eyed and making Shakky chuckle as she patted Luffy's head and directed her towards the ship where most of the remainders of Baroque Works, Vivi, and Dadan were patiently waiting.

"Don't worry Lu-chan. Garp already trained you right?" Shakky asked as she pushed her granddaughter and daughter-in-law to get on the ship first.

"Yep with the forest and the ravine and the pit and those balloons and the monkeys and the bears and the-" Luffy chattered for a moment before Shakky cut her off with a twitching eyebrow as she turned and gave her husband, who was beaten and bruised and bleeding and yet still managed to go pale, a look that promised damnation at another time.

"Well he's had his turn to train you so now it's your Kaa-chan and Baa-chan's turn. You'll be stronger than I am in two years baby girl." Shakky promised making every marine there gulp and pale, some taking potshots at Luffy or Shakky only for Shakky to dodge them almost casually and Luffy to not be bothered as the bullets bounced off of her back at the shooters.

"Sugoi! Luffy can't wait! Ah Vivi-chan? Do you have a den den mushi Luffy can borrow real quick? Luffy has gotta let her crew know to train for two years." Luffy said looking at the princess as the ship began pulling out of the ice, thanks to help from Ace's devil fruit as he melted the thick ice easily.

"Of course Luffy-sama. I can send out messengers so that they can find your friends and tell them. Just give me the word and a place for them to meet you." Vivi said immediately as the ship sailed towards her kingdom.

"Don't call Luffy 'sama' and thanks Vivi-chan! We can all meet up at Saobody where Baa-chan has her bar!" Luffy said smiling thankfully at the princess as the medics came out from below deck and tended to everyone's wounds if they had any. Some were lucky and only had a few bruises, others had a few broken bones or some gunshot or sword wounds that needed to be taken care of.

"Ace-nii! Get stronger cause in two years…Luffy will kick your ass for thinking you're worthless! Luffy lost one brother already and Luffy doesn't want to lose her other one!" Luffy yelled to Whitebeard's ship, causing Ace to yell something back that was lost in the wind to everyone else while Luffy laughed, having apparently heard him.

Something else had Shakky and Hina freezing and releasing slightly homicidal auras.

"Lu-chan…where did you learn the word ass?" Shakky asked her granddaughter, her voice cold and flat.

"Eh? Luffy had been taken to Marineford by Jiji when Luffy was younger to see how Marines worked and he got called into a meeting. Luffy was left in the training field and one marine started making fun of Luffy so Luffy beat him up and the guy with the birdy hat said that it was a 'disgrace for a Marine Vice-Admiral to get his ass kicked by a seven year old girl'." Luffy said turning and pointing towards Marineford and causing two bursts of Killing Intent to come from her female ancestors.

The loud twin shout from Hina and Shakky had the feared Fleet Admiral paling and searching for a place to hide while wondering what he did to set them off on him. Usually only Garp was that stupid.

"SENGOKU!"