Brutal Awakening
Amanda's P.O.V.
The following morning seemed to go by too quickly. Natalie and her family went through the usual routine of showering, getting dressed, eating breakfast, and most of other morning rituals. As far as talking goes, there was none. The most conversation shared were a few concerned looks given to Natalie by Amanda.
Natalie pleaded, "Mom, can you please stop looking at me like that? I'm fine, and I don't know why you think I'm not. Please just stop."
Amanda was taken aback by this. Had her concern really shown that much? Feeling sudden interest in this outburst Amanda decided to look further into Natalie's blank expression.
"I'm not worried Natalie. I don't know why I'd be. I was going to ask you anyway if you wanted to come with me out to lunch." Amanda said trying to hide a conspiring frown.
Amanda really did sense something wrong with Natalie. Her eyes seemed to turn colder and distant. Even if they had become a bright green from their original baby blue color inherited from Adam. Somehow Natalie's eyes resembled John's. They were beady and blank. Natalie's normally laughing and happy eyes seemed to have disappeared over the course of a day.
Natalie replied, "Where are we going to go."
"I'm thinking pizza," Amanda said faking a smile.
For the car ride to Pizza Hut Natalie didn't say a word. Amanda was beginning to think Natalie was dead.
Silence was abruptly ended when Natalie asked, "Mom? What can you tell me about my grandpa, John?"
Amanda slammed her foot on the brakes after hearing this. Having just avoiding a red SUV, Amanda pulled over to the side of the road and put her hands on her face.
"My God Natalie, are you okay?" Amanda asked in between gasps.
Natalie replied, "I'm fine, but you failed to answer my question about my grandpa, John.
Natalie's voice was cold and demanding. It sounded just like John to Amanda, which made her cringe.
"I'll tell you, but you're not going to be happy." Amanda said smoothing out her hair.
They pulled into the Pizza Hut parking lot and found a table far away from everyone else in the restaurant. Having suddenly lost her appetite, Amanda began to rack her brain as to how she could word her memories of John to her daughter. She watched as Natalie ate a slice of plain cheese pizza. Not Amanda's favorite, but Natalie never liked toppings like pepperoni. Feeling that it was time to start talking, Amanda began to reveal various chapters of her life.
She began, "Your father and I originally grew up in New York City. In my younger years I developed some bad habits. I'm sure that on the news you have seen at least one or more reports of the Jigsaw killer. I am telling you now that the man you know as 'Grandpa' is the Jigsaw killer. I didn't want to tell you because I didn't think you could handle it, and I have no idea how you found out about John being your adopted grandfather. He is responsible for the kidnapping and deaths of over ten people. I can now tell you that I helped. I was one of his first tests. He preferred to call his 'games' tests because he gave his subjects a chance to live. I survived my test, and he made me into his apprentice. I was supposed to carry out John's work after he died, but I didn't.
Natalie asked, "Why not?"
Amanda continued, "He was a murderer. He tortured people for the sake of his own sick pleasure. He said he was trying to help people, but nobody changes. If they survived the most that would happen is that those people would walk around for the rest of their miserable lives afraid of their own shadows. I was the only survivor. Thinks haven't changed for me. I'm still lost, and I'm still afraid. He couldn't fix me, and I saw no point when it comes to fixing others. How could anyone kill another person and live with themselves? I still have nightmares about Eric Matthews. I still wake up thinking there is another trap on my head. I can't keep trying to kid myself into thinking nothing's wrong when I know John was a part of my life. Now you know who your grandfather is. We have no ties in blood, but he's the closest thing to family that I had besides you and Adam."
After returning home, Natalie and Amanda did not speak. Natalie spent most of the evening playing card games with Adam. It wasn't until late in the evening when Natalie was in her room listening to her iPod that Adam and Amanda had a true chance to talk about Natalie's strange new changes.
Adam said, "Do you think something's seriously bothering Natalie?"
Amanda replied, "Of course something's wrong. She knows about John. I have no idea how she found out about him being her adopted grandfather because I didn't tell her. Did you?"
"No. We agreed when she was little that we would keep the truth from her until she was old enough to handle it." Adam said in a concerned tone, "The only other thing I can think of that could give that away was maybe the news or her teachers."
Amanda snapped, "If her teachers knew that would mean they know about me being John's apprentice. I'd be in jail or dead right now."
"Unless you can think of any other alternative, there is no possible way that Natalie could know about John." Adam said in a soothing manner.
After this conversation, Adam went to check on Natalie and found her sleeping soundly. It was only after Adam and Amanda went to bed that Natalie began work on her first trap, the enormous toaster. Her philosophy had merged with Jigsaw's; fix the living or discard the dead.
