10 Things I am not allowed to do Around Gokudera Hayato

Warnings/ Disclaimer: Rated T for Gokudera potty mouth! This is unbeta-d! So I am extremely sorry for the poor grammar and spelling mistakes. .

Also, the title is also some sort of reference to AppleSnapple's 100 Things I am not Allowed to Do in Hyoutei.

I do not own Katekyo Hitman Reborn!

I should probably rate this chapter an M for uhh… innuendos? O.e? Suggestive Sexual themes? No? Err… Well, yeah.

Oh! And I don't own 'Touchin' on My" by 3OH!3 and 'I kissed a girl" by Katy Perry. :) And Bonamana by Super Junior and Lucifer by SHINee. :D


Number Five

You are not allowed to give Gokudera Hayato a reason to start singing. Seriously.


They were hanging out at Rai's place again, wasted and incredibly bored to death. Rai was face first on her bed, looking as if she wanted to smother herself with her pillow. JiHi was on the couch opposite the bed, her legs hanging off from one side of the upholstery. Gokudera straddled the back of Rai's computer chair, his chin on top of his arms that lay harmlessly on top of the chair's back. Tatsumaru, Tsuna and Yamamoto were on the floor, reading random non-yaoi mangas… for the 5th time during the last 30 minutes.

"Why is it when I want Rai to be her crazy self, she isn't?" Gokudera muttered, rocking the chair sideways.

"Shut up, Gokudera. If you're bored, go catch Tsuna's fart or something." Rai retorted.

Tsuna made a slightly disgusted face but it quite a feat to be able to recognize it under all that shock.

Gokudera just frowned and glared daggers at her head.

"Man, I'm bored!" Tatsumaru said, giving up on the manga he held within his hands.

Rai then, proceeded to sing out loud, "BOUNCE TO YOU! BOUNCE TO YOU! Nae gaseumeun neol!"

JiHi smirked and then began singing another song as well, "Nareul mukkgo gadundamyeon sarangdo mukkin chae!"

Tatsumaru blinked, "Do you even understand what you guys are singing anyway?"

"No." both said in unison.

Tatsumaru introduced his palm to his face.

And they never saw Gokudera open his mouth to sing when…

The door to the bedroom burst open with a force that allowed it to bounce close again, promptly hitting Reborn flat on the face when he attempted to enter in midair.

"…"

The room was eerily silent save for the sound of the door slamming shut.

"…"

"Must make out with the door with my dying will." Tatsumaru muttered, half amused and half shocked.

Ladies and Gentlemen, meet the most trusted hitman of Vongola IX.

The door opened to reveal Reborn again, although he now sported a rather large lump on his forehead.

Tsuna sweatdropped, "Err… Reborn!" he began tentatively, "What brings you here?"

"Oooh! The baby is here! Haha~!" Yamamoto exclaimed.

Reborn turned his dark beady eyes at Tsuna, who immediately tried to recall the only technique he mastered since day one. The 'must-remove-myself-from-Reborn's-line-of-sight-with-haste-before-I-become-target-practice' maneuver.

Reborn then took his gun from who-knows-where and pointed it at Tsuna, "I'm bored. I was looking for something to aim at. I'm feeling extra homicidal today."

Tsuna visibly paled, squealed a sharp "Eee!", ducked and breathed a sigh of relief when no bullet appeared on his forehead when he heard a loud "BANG!" and trying to convince himself that the 'IMMA FIRING MAH LAYZZZZZAR!" he heard was NOT Reborn.

And Tsuna silently wondered who took the dying will bullet instead.

"REEE-!" an angry tenor voice screeched behind him, which sounded suspiciously like-, "BOOOOORN!"

"Oh shit.", everyone around the room thought when the Gokudera Hayato promptly burst out of his very, very stylish clothes.

JiHi silently wept at their loss before proceeding to cover Rai's and her eyes.

Gokudera, standing only on his heart-print white boxers… -and were those number 10s inside every hot pink heart?-, was not a very good sight to behold.

Tsuna's eyes looked as if they were about to pop out of their sockets.

Yamamoto was too busy trying to find out where Gokudera got those boxers, silently hoping that whoever sold them had number 18 prints as well.

Tatsumaru gaped, before slowly inching away from Reborn and his gun. Damn, he was NOT going near guns that made you lose your clothes, dammit!

Reborn shrugged, his homicidal tendencies sated… for now.

"I'M GOING TO SING WITH MY DYING WILL!" Gokudera exclaimed, hot red flame dancing on his forehead. He seemingly produced a random microphone from nowhere as well.

"…"

"What kind of regret is that?" someone muttered from Gokudera's left, but he paid it no mind. He was going to sing, dammit.

"…"

"HIT IT, LAMBO!"

"Uweeheeheeheehee!" came the deranged laughter of a 5-year old.

"…"

"… Our futures are screwed." Tatsumaru said, eyeing the crazy ass cow. Whoever said that the children were the future certainly hasn't seen Lambo yet. Or anyone of their lot for that matter.

Lambo pressed a random button and upbeat, techno music suddenly played.

Rai wrenched JiHi's hand from her eyes and then wished she hadn't when she saw Gokudera sashaying his hips in a provocative manner. ON TOP OF HER TABLE.

Rai suddenly made a mental note to burn the table when this insanity was over. And then scrub her eyes with muriatic acid afterwards.

And then she promptly turned green, then pink, then red, and then green again.

"… OH GOD."

JiHi risked a look, and her jaws and hand dropped simultaneously. For the love of everything holy!

"G-g-girl I gotta know!" Gokudera started, swaying his hips and pointing at JiHi and Rai who were too busy imitating a goldfish… that was out of water.

"How you dance like that!D-d-dance like that!

You dance like that! Cause you're puttin' on a show!"

"STOP STUTTERING, RETARD!" Rai exclaimed.

"Can I take you back?

Take you back

I just gotta ask you the…"

"Seriously, dude. Shut up." JiHi muttered.

"Show me yours, I'll show you mine!" Gokudera threw JiHi a look that was not meant to be sent to little children. 'Make me, darling!'

JiHi gaped and then turned white. And then, red. And then white. And then … purple?

"WHAT." JiHi deadpanned.

"Don't you worry, you're too fine!

We got one thing on our minds

And we got plenty of tiiiiime!"

"I certainly don't have time for you or your insanity, Ahodera." JiHi muttered while Rai nodded her head all too eagerly. She was clearly distressed.

Tatsumaru just went ahead, tossed manners (not that he had one) out the window and said, "Eww."

"Girl I gotta go, I'm finished with the show

If you wanna –TOOT- me, I won't say no!"

"Excuse ME?"

"T-t-t-touchin on my – TOOT-" JiHi highly appreciated the bleep in the song. There were five-year-olds here, dammit.

"While I'm touchin on your –ToooT-.."

"HOLY SHIT!" Rai exclaimed when she finally figured out what the fucking hell the bleeps were censoring.

"You know that we are gonna –TOOOT-.." Tatsumaru calmly placed his hands over his ears.

"Cause I don't give a –TooT-.."

Gokudera then let himself drop from the low table, fell right in front of Tsuna and continued singing a few more verses and back to the chorus,

"Cause I wan't you to knoooooow...!" He dragged off the last word, swaying his hips and his ass missed Tatsumaru's nose by a centimeter.

"Girl I gotta go, I'm finished with the show!"

"If you wanna –

"FUCK!" Rai exclaimed. And JiHi face-palmed herself. Damn that woman. The bleep was there for a reason, dammit!

"- me, I won't say no!

T-t-t-touchin on my –"

"SHIT!" Tatsumaru screamed just for the heck of it.

"While I'm touchin on your-"

"…err… tits?" Yamamoto said hesitantly.

JiHi's jaw dropped for the second time in five 2 minutes. And she silently vowed to throttle the idiot who had …had… CORRUPTED YAMAMOTO'S INNOCENCE!

Rai frowned.

Tsuna looked confused. What were tits? But decided not to ask when he felt killing intent rise from where JiHi was situated.

"You know that we are gonna -!"

"BULLSHIT!"

"Cause I don't give a -!"

"BATSHIT!"

"I don't give a -!"

"GRAPE JUICE!"

"I don't give a -!"

"DAMN FUCKING CRAP!"

"I don't give a -!"

"WILL YOU SHUT UP ALREADY?"

"I don't give a -!"

"Aren't the five minutes up yet?" JiHi screamed.

"Nope!" Yamamoto said after glancing at his watch.

Rai squawked.

"PLAY ME ANOTHER SONG, LAMBO!" Gokudera screamed and then proceeded to use Rai's bookshelf as an impromptu pole for his pole dancing attempt.

Rai sighed. She was going to have to smother her bookshelf with disinfectant now.

This was the 10th Generation Vongola Storm Guardian; in charge of logistics and Intel.

"I KISSED A GUY AND I LIKED IT! I HOPE THE TENTH WON'T MIND IT!"

Heaven help the Mafia world.


O. WA. RI.

:]