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Disclaimer: I don't own twilight. And this story is not beta'd by anyone but myself.

A/N: I'm going to Kansas tomorrow, so, I won't have internet or my laptop. I'm sorry!

Bella POV

People say that absence makes the heart grow fonder; they're right- in a way. I've been doing what Dr. Banner told me to do, and have been avoiding Edward at every attempt that he has tried to make contact with me.

I just simply refuse it.

I've been thinking of what Dr. Banner said, about us not being 'destined' to be with each other, and I've… accepted the fact.

I use the term accepted very loosely.

It is, of course, hard to let him go. It is hard to let anyone go who you have known since kindergarten. And loved.

But, whatever.

You have three new voicemails:

I sighed. They were all from Edward.

First new voicemail:

"Hey, Bella, listen… I don't know why you're avoiding me, but, I just wanted to let you know that I will respect you're decision, I just didn't want you to think that I was skipping out on-"

Message deleted.

Next new voicemail:

"Bella… it's been four days. This is the most we've been without talking-"

Message deleted.

I scoffed. What about that summer that he left me?

Next new voicemail:

"Bella. It's your next therapy session today. Do you need a ride? Call me."

Message deleted.

You have no more new voicemails. To check erased messages press-

I pushed the off button and sighed. His last message; he sounded genuine; carefree. Like how he used to sound. I miss how we used to be.

Before he left. Before I told him I loved him. Before I tried to kill myself. Before everything.

Flashback

"Hey, Bellarina, wanna go out for a bite? Yes? Cool. Kay, see you in thirty!" I listen to my voicemail and laughed. Then I looked at the clock. That message was fifteen minutes ago.

Shit!

There was no way I was going to miss a day with Edward. I dashed up the stairs, taking three at a time. Yeah, I'm that cool. What to wear, what to wear…

Sweater or t-shirt? Skirt or dress? Jeans?

I decided on a Rolling Stones t-shirt and a pair of faded blue jeans.

Casual.

I almost changed my mind, but the doorbell rang. Well, guess this is it.

I practically ran down the stair; tripping the whole way. Yanking the door open- "Hi, Edward. Want to come in?" I pushed my hair behind my ears and smiled shyly. He was so, beautiful. With his tousled bronze hair and his dark washed jeans, everything about him demanded attention.

"Well, Bella. I would love to stay and chat, but we have to go." then he smirked. "Nice t-shirt." I looked down and blushed, "Oh. Well, I-I, um," he smiled, "Its perfect, Bella." He leaned down and pressed a small kiss on the top of my head.

I sighed and closed my eyes, reveling in the feeling.

"Alrighty then, let's go."

All too soon, the moment was over.

"So, where we are going, nobody knows about." His eyes flashed with excitement, "Where are we going?" I asked, "Somewhere." He answered vaguely. "Edward, you know I don't like surprises." He looked at me, smiling.

My heart stuttered.

He was so, beautiful.

"I'm sure you'll like this one."

And then he looked back at the road, a smile dancing on his lips.

Ex'd

I loved that day. He took me to his meadow. It was one of the last times that I saw him before he left. A bitter taste filled my mouth, and I scowled at the ground.

I completely messed it up.

I had hinted that I loved him and he left the next day.

Flashback

"Hey Edward?" I asked, my feet fidgeting against the carpet on his apartment floor. "Yeah?" he asked, distracted by the TV. "um, I just wanted to let you know that… that I love you." I looked down; afraid of his reaction.

I had been holding this feeling in for so long; I couldn't do it anymore. He turned to me and smiled, "I love you too, Bells." But, when he saw my expression, his tone turned serious, "What brought this on?"

He didn't get it.

I loved him.

Like, loved him.

"Bella?'

"I really love you." I mumbled.

Edward didn't say anything.

"I love you too, Bella." He said slowly. And then he looked back at the TV with a troubled expression.

Ex'd

The next day, he left.

And came back, a year later.

Engaged.

His betrayal hurt.

Not only because I loved him, but also because he couldn't, didn't, confide in his supposedly, 'best friend' that he had a fiancé.

I sighed.

Maybe we really weren't meant to be with each other. Tugs and pulls at my heart made me think differently, but my head was telling me that I should have never loved him.

Which one do I listen to? I didn't know. But, what I did know, was that I had to let him go and to let him be happy.

Ex'd

I didn't accept Edward's offer to give me a ride. I instead texted him a quick and curt message, saying I could drive myself and thanks. That's all I could do.

Ex'd

"So, Isabella. How did this weeks' homework go?" Dr. Banner asked, expectantly. "Good enough." I looked away. "How did you do?" I shrugged. "I don't know. I didn't talk to him at all, he called me over and over, but I ignored them. The only time I made contact with him was when I texted him thirty minutes ago saying I didn't need a ride."

Dr. Banner smiled, "Good, Isabella. This process is like withdrawal from drugs." I looked at him skeptically. "Seriously. Isabella, it's hard to let him go, isn't it?" I nodded. "And, it's almost as if you're, per say, addicted to him, are you not?" I nodded reluctantly. "Bingo." And he left it at that.

"How about the writing portion?" I looked at him confused. "You forgot, didn't you?" I nodded, suddenly remembering the other part of my, 'homework'. "That's okay, Isabella. You've done well this week."

I didn't reply. "Isabella, tell me more about Edward, is he the reason you tried to kill yourself?" I nodded slowly and began to open my mouth.

Ex'd

My homework this week was to talk to Edward.

What?

It was like, a complete contradiction to last weeks, 'homework'. Was he trying to confuse me? Probably. That's what therapists do. Confuse people.

Whatever.

Sighing, I picked up my cellphone, an HTC vivid, and dialed Edward's number. He picked up on the first ring. "Hello?" he answered breathlessly. "Hey, its Bella." I said, shyly.

No duh, he has caller id.

Shut up.

"Hey, Bella! I um, was, uh, waiting for this call! Baby, who's on the phone?"

I scowled. Tanya. What was he doing with her? Was she the reason he was breathless in the beginning? EW. I almost gagged in my mouth.

"it's Bella, Baby, I'll be right back. No! Come back to bed, so we can…*giggle*" .ew. My heart hurt to hear him and her so happy. He was having sex with her while I was in therapy?

I sighed.

Of course they were. He was her fiancé.

"Uh, Edward, I'm just going to go." I stuttered. "No!" he yelled. I flinched, pulling the phone away from my ear, "It's not like that, and Tanya- she's just delusional." I smiled, delusional?

"Edward, it's okay, I understand, she's you're fiancé." I frowned, "No! We were not having sex! Of any kind!" he exclaimed, "Wh-what?" I stuttered, "Uh, never mind. We, uh, didn't do anything. Um, at all. I just wanted to let you know. And, uhm- how was your therapy session?"

"Edward, really, it's okay. I'll call you back later." I said reluctantly, I didn't really want to, but I'd be willing to in order to hear less of, 'delusional Tanya'. I smiled. "No, really Bella," he grunted slightly and I heard some shuffling and a door closing.

"It's fine. How was it?" he asked. "It was fine. He gets into my head a lot; it bugs me. But, I guess that's what he's paid to do." He laughed, "Yeah, I guess so. Listen, I uh, really missed talking to you."

I was shocked.

"Really?"

"yeah, I missed you. A lot." I could have sworn I heard, 'a lot more than I should.' But I didn't want to get my hopes up.

"huh. I uh, missed you too." I said, still in shock.

A smile slowly spread across my face.

"yeah, uhm, wanna get together tomorrow? Maybe a bite to eat? Or, a movie? Or at least, something?" my smile got bigger. This was the most Edward has asked me to do since he got back; from before my suicide fail.

Huh. Maybe, in Edward's case, absence really does make the heart grow fonder.

Review?

Thanks so much for reading!

I don't have internet access for the next few days; I'll be in Kansas. Sorry for the short chapter! I just wanted to get one up before Kansas.

Angelfallen4