(Mercy Thompson Series)
Lone Wolf
A/N - Sorry for the delay. I finally finished my other projects, freeing up my mind and time to focus on this story. I hope you find this chapter enjoyable. Michelle and Ben see each other for the first time since the bar scene, and they've both been on each other's minds, something neither is happy about. Please read and review. As always, thanks!
DISCLAIMER: I do not own the Mercy Thompson series or characters. That honor belongs to Patricia Briggs, and I receive no compensation for this work.
Chapter 4 – Avoidance
Mercy's garage was situated not too far from her home, just a little ways between Finley and Kennewick. Michelle had been helping Mercy around her garage for about two weeks now, and she had to admit, it was pretty interesting.
"Place it right here, please," Mercy said. She stepped out of the way as Michelle easily set the engine inside a Volkswagen Golf, Mercy's current project. The customer wanted some upgrades, and planned on picking up the vehicle in a week or so.
Michelle had never worked with cars before, but it felt good at the end of the day to know she had made at least a small difference. Her strength was very useful, from her ability to turn bolts that were rusted tight, to lifting objects that usually required winches to move.
The customers seemed nice, and some weren't shy about their happiness in seeing another pretty face around the shop. At least being here hadn't turned out to be the awkward spectacle Michelle had expected.
She really needed to learn to be more positive. Mercy was very nice, and Michelle felt even more comfortable with her than any of the wolves in the pack. Maybe she could even be a friend. Maybe things could finally change for her…maybe.
There had been a few moments today where Michelle had been concerned about Mercy. She had dropped a number of tools, one of them actually striking Michelle's foot. Thankfully, no harm was done.
Mercy had emphatically apologized. "I've been so clumsy of late," the Walker had said. "I chalk it up to being pregnant. I've never been this bad with the dropsies before. I think both my customers and I will be happy when Zee finally takes over for a while."
The rest of the day had gone smoothly and without any more incidents. Michelle had gotten busy unpacking and cataloging the new supplies that had arrived. Mercy's assistant, a young man by the name of Gabriel, had gone off to school, so Mercy was grateful for the help.
As she worked, Michelle's mind unwillingly, and for the umpteenth time, went back to Ben and his sad eyes. She grunted in irritation. Work was supposed to help her mind stay focused, but at the oddest times, she would think of him.
For a while she struggled to get past it, but finally knuckled down to complete all the work, following Mercy's instructions to the letter.
"Okay, I think that's it for today," Mercy said a couple hours later, wiping her hands with a rag. "I'm gonna wash up, and we can get out of here."
She went into the washroom, diligently scrubbing in an attempt to get the oil and grime out from under her fingernails. It took about 10 minutes altogether, and even then, she was unable to get it all off.
"Got any plans for tonight?" she asked when she returned. Michelle thought for a moment, remembering. "Adam called a meeting tonight; just usual stuff…new business, announcements, challenges, you know."
Mercy sighed. "Yes, I do know. I'm so glad I don't have to be there. It's very boring sometimes." She traded the day's earnings for her purse in the safe, closing it securely. "There are still some pack members who haven't completely accepted me anyway, so they won't be offended if I'm absent."
A small moment of silence followed where she seemed to be thinking about something.
When Mercy turned back to Michelle, her face was pensive, as if she had something to say. Michelle waited patiently, letting her collect her thoughts.
"Michelle," she began. "Part of the reason I was so clumsy today, is because of this." She raised her hands, and Michelle could see the definite shaking in her small fingers. "Believe me, this is not how I usually am," Mercy said.
Michelle was confused. She wasn't quite sure what Mercy was getting at. "I don't understand," she finally murmured. "So you have the shakes. Maybe you're stressed out or you're vitamin deficient."
Mercy shook her head. "No, it's not that. It's because I haven't changed since I found out I was pregnant." She walked over to sit on one of the chairs in the bay, slumping as if she were unable to stay on her feet. "Adam is worried. He requested that I try and not take coyote form for the duration of the pregnancy."
"That shouldn't be a problem, should it?" Michelle asked. She still didn't understand. "I mean, you're not a werewolf. You don't have to change with the full moon. Isn't it possible to do as he's asked?"
Mercy sighed. Werewolves. "No, I'm not a werewolf. My changes aren't something I can't control at all times. But I am as much coyote as I am human. I can't be one without being the other at least part of the time. And the lack of attention I am showing my furry side is starting to take its toll."
She looked at her shaking hand again. "I start to get really restless, very shaky, and altogether uncomfortable when I stay in human shape too long. I really could use a run." She looked Michelle in the face, attentive, but not using her rank in the pack to intimidate her.
"Would you run with me?" she finally asked. "I just want someone with me, just in case the worst happens. My changes aren't violent like yours. I shouldn't lose the baby. But I've never been pregnant before. If I do…" She closed her eyes and took a deep breath.
"If I do, I want someone there with me. I will need someone there." She was silent a moment. "But if all goes well, I know you won't tell Adam. You pretty much keep to yourself, and your loyalties aren't overwhelmingly with him."
The other wolves were Adam's before Mercy had come to live in that trailer all those years ago. She couldn't trust them to keep this to themselves.
"If we leave now, and head out to the reservation, do you think you could fit a run in with me?" Mercy looked so hopeful, it was impossible for Michelle to refuse her. She would keep this between them, of course, but they both knew that she would have to answer if Adam asked her.
She wouldn't dare lie to the Alpha.
I'd be happy to," she told her, smiling. "I could use a good run before this boring meeting anyway, to let off some steam."
Mercy grinned. "Great! Let's go." The two females gathered their things into Mercy's Rabbit, and the two drove out to the reservation. There, Michelle stood by as Mercy disrobed, her anxiousness obvious.
Michelle knew she was scared, knew that Mercy was confident that her change would not endanger her baby. It was just that off chance that Adam was right, that something would happen, that made Mercy a bit nervous.
He would most certainly be upset if something happened to their baby.
Insecurity aside, Mercy needed the assurance and comfort that her coyote shape provided. She didn't want Adam to be angry with her. She knew how much this baby meant to him, how precious a healthy baby would be to any werewolf.
But she could not subdue that which was so much a part of her. So she nodded at Michelle, and with a deep breath, flowed into her canine form. Michelle smiled. She made a cute coyote, her coat shiny and colorful.
"Do you feel any different?" she asked her. Mercy lifted a leg to scratch behind her ear and gifted Michelle with a canine smile. "Well, you don't look like you're in any pain. Why don't you head out a ways? I'll be along in a bit."
Mercy yipped at her, and trotted out from the car. Michelle removed her clothes, setting them neatly within the backseat. She began her change, enduring the pain of her muscles and bones rearranging themselves.
She tried to roll with the process, breathing deeply, only whining when it was especially painful. Finally she stood on four feet, her beautiful coat just starting to get longer with the fall season.
She was a dark sable color, often mistaken for black when in low light. In the sun it shone like dark chestnuts. Most of her body was colored thus, except she had a creamy stocking on her right hind leg.
The back of her ears were darker than her base color, and her tail was just barely tipped with white. Her eyes were her most striking feature, a cool, minty green color.
She remembered being referred to as a maned wolf at one time. Her former pack member had thought himself funny.
When Michelle had actually looked up the animal on Google, she had laughed. Yes, there were similarities, but she most certainly did not look like that tall, gangly-looking canine.
She had a good shake, shedding off the last tingles of the change before making her way out to Mercy, who was snacking on a field mouse she'd just caught. Swallowing the unfortunate creature, the coyote yipped at her again before sprinting through the long, dry grass.
Michelle was excited. She had felt cooped up in the garage at times, especially when her thoughts of Ben kept invading her ability to concentrate. It would be nice to just let go and be wolf for a while.
The two ran full speed, eventually startling a hare. It was child's play for Michelle to bring it down, and she munched on a haunch while letting Mercy eat the majority of it. She was the one eating for two after all.
Afterward, the two females laid down for a brief nap, the wolf's body sheltering the coyote. Michelle noted her already innate need to protect Mercy. It would seem she was truly integrated into this pack. Adam's will was upon her. She really didn't know how she felt about that.
If his dominance, his power, had already manifested within her, it could make things more difficult when the time came to make her escape. If he decided to Call her, she would be unable to resist.
Mercy noted her sudden stiffness, and figured it was probably time to end their run. Michelle had a meeting to attend after all. So the coyote came to her feet, shook out her coat, and began the return trip back to the Rabbit at a trot.
Michelle followed behind, preparing herself mentally for the events of the evening. She would continue on to Adam's house, change, and attend the meeting.
Her thoughts strayed back to Ben, and her heart seemed to jump in her chest. Why she reacted that way she didn't know, but somehow she was looking forward to seeing him again.
What she did know was that the red wolf had been ducking her ever since their interaction at the bar two weeks ago. She had wanted to speak with him, to ask what had really happened in his past.
That he was avoiding her had been made obvious when Ben had come over to Warren's one afternoon with a message from Adam. She'd been sitting in the living room, playing chess with Kyle.
He'd entered the house, taken one glance at Michelle, and had immediately looked elsewhere. He had barely uttered the message before he was back out the door, almost as if he'd never been there.
She didn't like it. She liked it even less that it bothered her. Why should she even care? It was still his fault that she was even here, stuck with this pack she hadn't wanted. If anything, she owed him her disdain not concern.
But be that as it may, she still wanted to speak with him. She still remembered him at the bar, and the sadness and tentative hope in his face when he had asked if she believed the rumors. Michelle had not expected to see such sentiment.
She really hadn't thought the red wolf cared what others thought of him.
In any case, she just wanted to clear the air between them. She had never been one to believe idle chatter or conjecture, having been a victim of it a time or two. Who knew what was true or not?
All she would do is let him know she believed him. Then she'd be fine if they never spoke again in life. This was what Michelle told herself as she escorted Mercy back to her car.
The Walker changed back, stretching happily. "Ah, it felt so good to be myself again!" She looked down at Michelle, who was gazing at her, a happy wolf grin on her face. "Thank you for that."
Michelle grunted and swiped her tail a couple of times in response. After Mercy slipped her clothes back on, she opened the door so the wolf could climb in and the two made their way back, Mercy laughing when the wolf hung her head out the window.
Mercy stopped about a mile or two from their destination, letting Michelle out so they wouldn't be seen together. Michelle had had no reason to change while accompanying Mercy, so the two had not wanted to raise suspicion.
To the pack it would look as if Michelle had went on a solo run, something not out of the ordinary.
Michelle made it to Adam's house shortly after Mercy did. When she arrived, Darryl was there to let her in. She walked past, trying not to look guilty with her lowered tail and ears. She kept her eyes on the path before her, careful not to make eye contact.
Adam's second seemed like a stoic, disciplined individual, and she had no intention of getting on his bad side. He merely raised an eyebrow at the female, closing the door behind her as she entered.
She made her way to the changing room, happy to find that Mercy had been there before her, and had left her clothes neatly folded on a bench. After changing back, as quickly as she could manage, Michelle checked herself in the mirror and went out to the hallway leading to the living room where the meeting was taking place.
Others had arrived as well, and were themselves making their way in. As she was moving in their direction, she heard the front door open. It was none other than Ben, whose back was to her as he softly shut the door.
When he turned around and saw Michelle, he tried to ignore her, per usual. She called out to him. "Um, Ben, I wanted to talk with you—"
The blonde only stopped long enough to mutter, in his infuriatingly English accent, "The meeting is under way, and you are making me late," before easing on past her and losing himself among the other wolves in the living room.
Dammit! Michelle thought. She was going to make him hear her!
She stopped a moment to calm herself, not wanting to let his standoffish attitude get her temper up, before she followed him in.
The meeting began as she entered, and she made herself comfortable, standing along the wall for the proceedings. Ben had situated himself alongside Warren, on the side of the room away from her, she noted with annoyance.
The mutterings of the crowd ceased as Adam began.
Indeed the meeting was boring, though important. It was mostly about being observant of what other supernaturals were doing, making sure to report anything too irregular.
Adam had heard several news reports detailing attacks on humans that resembled animal attacks. With the wolves only just recently having revealed themselves, he didn't want werewolves indicated in all the bad press.
He was sure none of his pack was responsible. He would have been able to tell through the bonds. Perhaps they were loners just passing through, as Michelle had been. He would make it a point to speak with Bran to see if he had any information.
Adam fully expected the Marrok to send his son Charles to investigate the matter if the incidences continued. Even if Bran would give him ample notice, Adam wanted to avoid this.
He would keep his pack on alert so the matter could be remedied at the lowest level possible.
After a couple of other announcements and other matters, the meeting dispersed. Some of the wolves stayed around to socialize, and many left out on their own business.
Michelle exited the living room but pretended to eye some books on a bookcase in the hallway, hoping to catch Ben when he was done speaking with their Alpha. He had to come out some time.
He finally did, making a beeline for the door, Michelle noticed. He nearly made it too. But she wasn't having it. Not this time. As he went to shut the door behind him, she grabbed the door knob, jerking it back so she could follow him out.
When he saw it was she, he calmly released the door and walked in the direction of his red truck. "Hold on a moment!" Michelle called to him. "I wanna talk to you!"
Ben stopped just short of reaching his vehicle. He leveled cold, green eyes on her. "What do you want?"
Shocked that he was actually granting her a moment to talk, Michelle sputtered a moment before making sensible words. "I-It's about that night at the bar, what you said."
He rolled his eyes, making a dismissive motion with his hand. "What's the point? You've already made up your mind about me, just like the rest of the bitches in this pack. I would be wasting my time trying to explain anything to you. Now, if you are done…"
He turned away, continuing to his vehicle, effectively dismissing Michelle. She took a deep breath, gritting her teeth as she felt her anger rising again. Part of her just wanted to say fuck it, and let him go about his superior way. After all, they were just pack mates, not friends.
But that part of her that was empathetic, the part that had been affected by the expression she'd seen in his eyes, wanted to have this discussion, to make things right between them.
That was the part of her that had her moving to Ben's retreating back, had her placing a gentle, yet firm, hand on his shoulder just as he was about to climb into his truck.
"Why won't you just listen to me?" she asked him. She felt the undeniable stiffening in his shoulders at her touch, but she didn't expect what happened next.
He never turned to look at her, never moved at all. He simply spoke in a calm, gruff voice. "Do. Not. Touch. Me." He jerked his shoulder from her hand, and climbed in without another word.
Michelle stood there, stunned and not a little hurt, though she would never admit it, at his rejection. What was his problem?
As his vehicle's engine ignited, she decided to just spit the words out. If he listened or even heard her, at least no one could say she hadn't tried.
"I believe you!" she said to Ben's rolled up window. She knew he could hear her. "I believe you, okay?" She could hear him put the truck in gear, and she caught the look on his face as it began to lurch slowly forward.
It went from shock, to relief, to skepticism. Still she spoke once more, a little louder. "I just wanted you to know that." He turned his face away as his truck accelerated.
Michelle sighed as she watched his tail lights roll out of Adam's driveway and out of sight. At least he knew now, which was a relief. She could move on and enjoy other pursuits, which at the moment was nothing more than accompanying Warren back home.
Hopefully she would find another job that would pay her enough to find her own apartment. It was nice digs at Warren's house, of course, but she felt a little bit like a freeloader, and that was never her way.
Warren had offered to let her live at his former home, seeing as he had moved in with Kyle months ago. Michelle had stated she would consider it, once she had the ability to pay him rent. Warren had frowned, shaking his head and muttering about pride and downfalls.
Michelle had smiled at him. Warren and Kyle were quickly becoming like family. She felt comfortable and free around them, almost as much as she did with Mercy.
And it was that fact that worried her. She wasn't supposed to form ties, wasn't supposed to care about any of these wolves. Yet here she was, about to engage in another movie night with them.
She even thought of talking to them, about herself, and what she'd been running from when the pack had found her. Maybe…
Annoyed at her lack of resolve, she sighed again, resigned for the night. Warren caught her eye as she neared Adam's house, and she got into his truck to head home.
She'd hopefully have better interactions with that fool wolf in the future or none at all. Until then, she'd try her best to forget about him for now, difficult as it was. She watched the night sky, with its waxing moon, and wondered how the next run would go in a week, when her face would be bright and full.
Would Ben continue to ignore her? She shut her eyes, and her mind, on thoughts of him. She needed a distraction.
Well, it was her turn to choose the flick they'd watch. Maybe a nice action or comedy would take her mind off things. Michelle thought about it. She was most definitely staying away from anything remotely romantic, that's for sure.
She continued to rest her eyes, leaning against the window of the truck as Warren drove them home. He seemed to know she was troubled, bless him, and they traveled in comfortable, companionable silence.
It was very relaxing.
Ben was also traveling home, attempting not to speed. The cops on this stretch of highway were known to ghost up on speeders, and the last thing he wanted was a ticket. His mind was so busy though, that he almost didn't care.
That woman… He hadn't been able to stop thinking about her completely since the night he'd caught her scent and the pack had brought her back to Adam's house. Ever since then, she'd been flitting in and out of his thoughts, despite his resistance to it.
He really didn't know why. If anything she was unremarkable and irritating. What's worse, she had fallen right in with all the females of the pack, complete with a dumb-ass attitude and closed mind. They gossiped like ignorant fish wives and believed everything they heard, particularly about him.
For him to actually give two shits about this woman's opinion was beyond annoying. The girl could piss off as far as he was concerned.
He recalled his desperation that night in the bar. Why had he done that? He should have just let her go with what she thought. Maybe that would encourage her to leave him the hell alone, exactly what he preferred.
Now she felt the need to coddle him with her pity. She may have seemed sincere with her words, and for a moment he'd actually believed her. But in the end, he knew she was like all the others.
All she would do is draw him in with her false sentiments. Then she'd use him…leave him cold, broken, and alone. He'd finally been able to heal and leave those feelings behind. He really wasn't in a hurry to experience them again.
Besides, nothing was more untrustworthy than a beautiful woman.
Ben realized he thought her so just in time to glance at his speedometer… as the lights of a patrol car began to blaze in his rear view mirror. He struck his steering wheel in frustration, pulling over.
Fuck!
