Hippy Hippos

?!The Zoo!?

Bella: Ooh, Eddie, look at that big grizzly bear! I bet it could beat up Emmett!

Emmett: -must control urge to attack grizzly bear to show his super-ness-

Alice: Bella, let's go look at the kangaroos!

Bella: Do kangaroos eat cheese?

Edward: Last time I checked, no

Bella: Oh yeah! Well... trees are... guh... green!

Jacob: Did you guys see those snakes? They were like, ten feet long!

Bella: Mister... master... mustard

Mike: Let's go attack the penguins with our superior intelligence!!!

Emmett: Dude, we have got to go see the baboons

Alice: Time for a family reunion isn't it, Emmett?

Bella: Eddie, I want ice cream

Edward: Okay, Bella, what flavor do you want? –Silently endures the pain-slash-humiliation of being called Eddie-

Alice: She's going to answer pickle but I suggest you get strawberry

Edward: -raises eyebrow-

Alice: Don't ask

Bella: Hey! Eddie! I feel all left out now! And where's my pickle ice cream?

Edward: -dashes off to get strawberry ice cream due to the fact that he's pretty sure they don't make pickle flavored ice cream-

Bella: Jacob, eat some lettuce. It's like cheese but green with little orange polka dots!

Jacob: Uh... Is she alright? ARE YOU HIGH OFF HOTDOGS AGAIN BELLA?!?!?!?!

-awkward silence-

Edward: Here's your ice cream, Bella –hands Bella strawberry ice cream-

Bella: Yay! Ketchup! Just what I asked for

Alice: -confused expression-

Mike: Let's go see the hippos

Bella: Eddie! I wanted to see the bunny rabbits!!

Edward: -sigh- We'll go see the rabbits, love

Mike: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

Jacob: Everyone do the jelly bean dance!!! –randomly starts dancing to non existent music-

Alice: Let's all go buy giraffe hats!!!

-that weird awkward whistling sound that you make when people think you did something so you do that so they don't think you did anything but they think you did something because you're acting like you didn't do anything, also known as unsuccessfully avoiding shopping trip with Alice for giraffe hats-

Emmett: I'm bored

Edward: Let's leave

-everyone agrees-

?!Wal-Mart!?

Bella: Edward, why are we at Wal-Mart?

Edward: You know, I don't actually know, love

Alice: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!!!

Jacob: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!!!

Emmett: -not getting it- OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORG!!!

Edward: Uh...

Mike: -randomly starts doing the chicken dance while sniffing his shoe-

-silence yet again-

Bella: Eddie... WAAAAAAAAAAH!!! Ah, I feel so much better now

Edward: Bell-

Alice: MUST. BUY. RANDOM. JUNK!!!!!!!!!!

Mike: MUST. FOLLOW. ALICE. SLASH. BOB. AND. BUY. RANDOM. JUNK!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Edward: Do you think they'll be alright?

Alice: Did you know that Wal-Mart does not sell walls?! Pfft! Lame-o. Why the heck did they call it Wal-Mart?

Emmett: Oh. My. God. I have just made an amazing discovery. LISTEN UP EVERYONE!!!

-everyone within like, three miles turn to look at Emmett to see what he's going to say-

Emmett: Okay. Take a deep breath Emmett. Don't rush it. Just... breathe in and out, and in, and out, and... I forgot

Jasper: How intelligent, Emmett

Edward: Why are we still passing notes? In Wal-Mart?

Mike: Like, dude, I dunno

Bella: HIPPY HIPPOS!!!

Alice: And that was yet another random outburst from the well-known Bella Swan

Bella: Olives are like eggs with eyeballs

Edward: What a wonderful observation, Bella –learning to handle Bella's randomness after finding out that it was not due to overuse of caffeine-

Bella: Fred

&

"Eddie," said Bella, "GRRR!!! EEK!!! GAHBALEECOOKIE!!"

"Umm... Bella, are you alright?" asked Edward, scared for her health.

"NOOOOOOO!!!!!!! How could I be okay?" Bella sobbed, "Cotton candy... it looks so good, but it tastes like... like shit! How could something so beautiful taste like it came out of a cow's bottom?!"

"NOOOOOOO!!!" screamed the Vile Mike Newton, "You must not insult the cotton candy."

"Lollipop. That's a funny word. Lollipop," Bella giggled.

And then a watermelon exploded, sending shards of pomegranate to fly all over the place, causing a flamingo to land on the Eiffel Tower only to be squashed by a monkey-eating airplane. Then, Bella had to go trip over the whole thing to land on a space shuttle headed for Mars, but then fall off and land in Edward's arms, fall asleep, and start singing the Barbie song like she's on drugs. This caused Edward to be very frightened, and brought her to Carlisle the doctor. Carlisle was not home, though, so Bella started shrieking the words 'Mr. Hammer Ate Mr. Bigfoot' over and over until poor Edward's ears hurt. Bella fell silent after that, and Jacob appeared out of nowhere, thinking that Bella was having a seizure, and performed CPR on her, and then walked away licking an orange popsicle. Yep. Just another day in the life of Isabella Marie Swan Soon-To-Be-Cullen.