I walked into the mess hall, shoving my hands in my pockets as I had my hair down past my shoulders and my heart was going at 50 miles her hour again. As soon as I grabbed my tray with the food, I was now standing there like a deer in headlights After being invited to get dinner with the rest of Easy Company, I could no stop thinking about how I was going to present myself now. As soon as the boys left, I was panicking. I was never one to be around too many guys at one time, and now I was going to be in front of a whole Company whom wanted to meet me because I was a sister to one of their own. Was Joe going to like this? Did he even want me there? This was stupid, what was I thinking?
I stood at the entrance, holding my tray of food and looking at the sea of soldiers and nurses that were already talking and eating with each other. I was so used to going to the nurse's area with the other women there, which was on one end of the mess hall. But now it was going to be different, very different. So I was frozen in my spot as if I was glued to the floor and not able to move. There was something keep me there: the fear of rejection and not being liked by the others. Why was this such a huge deal now?
"There she is!" I heard on the other end of the mess hall, having me look down the middle row and see a couple of the Easy Company men that I met earlier looking over at me, waving me over as if they were waiting for me the whole time. I was about to go over there when I saw Joe pop up from his spot on the bench, walking over to me with a small smile on his face. Now this was my big concern, was I going to be a burden to him since he was already making friends of his own? I had Alice, and now Eugene as a friend. So who was I to go into his own friendship world?
"You okay?" He asked me, seeing that I was zoning out and I looked down at my own hand at my side. It was twitching, I saw it flinch for a mere moment and I panicked. It was a minor seizure, since my own thoughts were going on overload and my stress was piling up. I nodded my head at him, hiding my hands behind my back for him not to see the twitch that was going on with my left hand. He must have seen since he asked me and saw the hesitance in my eyes.
"I'm fine." I replied back to him, far too quickly and seeing him raise an eyebrow at me. He was reading my face, and I was hiding it very nicely for him. He then pointing behind him at the Easy Company men.
"You ready to eat?" He asked me, casual as always. I nodded his head, seeing him turn on his heel before I grabbed his arm and had him stop before he would walk away and back to the other men. He looked back at me, confusion in his eyes.
"Is this okay? Me….going over there?" I asked him, still trying to find the right words to use to my brother. At first he did nothing, not realizing what I was trying to say or do. But then it clicked with him, he faced me again.
"Why wouldn't it be?" He asked me in a shrug of his shoulders, as if it was nothing. I was still hesitant, not thinking it was a great idea.
"You don't think I would be cramping your style, would ya?" I pressed him more. It was then that he knew what I was talking about. There were times when we were teenagers when we would want our own time with our own friends, not wanting to be around the other. Although that was very rare for us to separate and not want the other to be around when we would go out, it was still something that I wanted to hold true since I never wanted to be the over attached to my own brother.
"You're not going to cramp my style, Jemmy. You're welcome with them. Hell, ever since I mentioned you on our first day here, they've been wanting to meet ya," Joe explained to me softly, giving me a rub on my arm with his hand and I saw a sincere smile on his face, "Come on, or I'll drag you."
"You wouldn't dare." I warned him, seeing him grin at me as we both started to walk over to the table where the men were. It made me feel better that he wanted me to join in with his new friends, though as we were walking over to the table, I saw something that made my stomach churn and my head feel heavy.
There was a soldier sitting on the edge of one of the stools, next to the open area where people were walking, and he was looking at me as if I was some kind of prize. His eyes were so dark, so inviting as he was grinning at me like a predator would to his prey. The soldier looked young, almost the same age as me, but there was nothing unique or kind about his face and how he was leaning against the stool like he was ready to move. I did not like the stare he gave me, though I walked on past him and behind my brother, though I could feel his eyes were still on me as we approached the table where the Easy Company men were sitting.
"Make room guys." Joe said to all of them, the boys scooting over to make two seats for the both of us. Joe hopped in first, and then If followed him. As soon as I sat down in my seat, I looked across and saw Luz and Malarky, the same guys from earlier who talked to both Eugene and I in front of the Nurse's cabin. They smiled at me, having me feel a bit better. Though I looked up and down the table and I saw no Eugene there, which made me a bit sad. So I took one bite from my food, not knowing what else there was to do.
"So, you're the other Liegbott?" One other Easy Company member asked me, though he was polite enough. Something about his bright blue eyes was piercing in the mess hall, along with his strong jawline and brown short hair.
"The one and only." Joe replied in a grin, having me smile and nod my head.
"I'm Jemima Liegbott," I introduced myself to them all, "But please call me Jemmy."
"Jemima?" He asked me, trying to get it right.
"Yeah. Our parents had the bright idea of using a bible to look up baby names." I explained, hearing chuckles from the men left and right.
"I'm David Webster. You can call me Web, and I have no idea if my own mom and dad called me after someone in the bible. But I think it's doubtful." the man introduced himself, shaking my hand gently and I smiled at him,
"Pleasure to meet you." I replied back to him.
"So why is it that you're nice and your brother here isn't?" Another soldier asked in curiosity, his voice made him sound like he was from Philadelphia, he had a bigger stance about him as he was across and one person down from me.
"Don't even start Guarnene." Joe warned him, but I grinned because he was clearly getting annoyed with this guy.
"Oh, come on, I'm just curious really? You're more polite than your brother next to ya." Guarnene went on with his antic.
"Don't mind Bill here," Another one talked out loud, over to my left and on the other side of Joe. He was a big guy with short strawberry blond hair had a big face. For some reason, he reminded me of a bear of some kind, big in stature but gentle in his tone, "He likes to push buttons around here. Especially with your brother."
"And one of these days he's going to get the bad end of it." Joe muttered as he drank down his tin can, a look of bitterness on his face.
"Its no problem," I replied to the bigger man, seeing him smile at me, "My brother can hold his own."
"No doubt in that. He already does with his mouth there," He added, then holding out his hand for me in front of Joe. I shook it, seeing how small my hand was in his massive one, "I'm Denver Randleman."
"Call him Bull," Luz said to me in confidence, having me look at him and see him grin from his spot next to Muck and Guarnene, "He may me a giant, but he's just a gentle as a bull."
"Jesus Luz, don't start." Bull said to him in his accent that made me think he was from the farm country. He suited him though, having me realize that all of these men were from all over America.
"According to your brother, you're one the best nurses around." Muck started up a conversation.
"Is that right?" I asked him, seeing him nod his head as I then looked over at my brother, who tried to eat his own food and not even be a part of the conversation.
"That's my brother for ya, knowing how to use his words to his own advantage." I commented, hearing the chuckle of the men again as Joe even smiled from what I said. We both were fine with our antics with one another, teasing and taunting one another and knowing it was just because we loved each other.
"But come on, tell us. How good are you?" Bull asked me as I took two bites from my own plate.
"I'm pretty good, though I'm not going to toot my own horn really." I reassured him, seeing him nod his head.
"That's not what Alice said." Webster commented, taking a bite from his food and having my head snap over at him in shock.
"You know Alice?" I asked him in curiosity, having the rest of the Company look at him as he was about to raise his fork with food on it into his mouth. He paused, looking at all of the men and then me, it was like he was a child who was caught with his hand in the cookie jar. We all waited for an explanation from him, since he was frozen in his spot and then lowering the fork to the tray again.
"I talk to her….from time to time." He explained slowly, and then the rest of the men breaking out in grins that were mischievous.
"Oh sure, you guys just talk…right…" Luz said in a teasing tone, having me smirk from how he said it, like an older brother.
"She's nice though, Webster." I reassured him gently, having me see him eye with a raised eyebrow at me and then looking at Joe as if he was comparing the both of us.
"I'm still wonderin' how you two are related." Webster commented, having both Joe and I smile from our spots next to each other on the bench.
"You should see her when she's pissed: that's when you'll know we're related." Joe explained, now having all the attention back on me once more as the men were giving me surprised looks. Joe knew of my own stubbornness and he was willing to talk about it with these men, and if he felt safe enough to talk about it then I should be safe about it too.
"Really?" Malarky asked in a surprised tone. I shrugged my shoulders, taking another bite from my food and then a long drink from my tin can.
"Joe should know: he did teach me how to hold a bat." I said in a comment, having me hear intakes of breaths from everyone around us though Joe remained cool in his spot, taking his own bite from his tray.
"I can't picture ya liftin' a pretty finger." Guarnene commented, having me look over at Joe who was now glaring at him, holding his fork and looking like he wanted to stab him in the heart or even in the eyes. I grabbed his arm gently in my hand, clutching him and silently telling him to not even try to look more of an idiot in front of all the men there.
"Just wait to piss me off," I said in a cool tone, the smiles were lowering slightly as I went on with the conversation, "I have a mean swing and I won't be afraid to use it." Joe grinned slightly next to me as I released his arm, seeing him eat his food again and I did the same. I may be the quieter and the gentler twin, but I too was willing to fight someone who would cross me wrong. It would take a lot for someone to rub me the wrong way, plainly and simply. However, Joe knew of my bolder side that was hardly seen by others, not even our parents.
"That she does." Joe commented to the table with his tin can against his lips.
"Good thing we have you on the right side in this war then, eh boys?" Luz said aloud to the group of men, all of them laughing and nodding in agreement. I was afraid that I would be seen as someone who was meek and not up to par with the rest of the people here in the army. But now I felt as though a new leaf was turned over with myself since most of the Easy Company men were grinning at me now.
"Oh look! Doc, over here Doc! Come on!" I looked from hearing another member who was motioned for someone to come to our table. I saw that it was Eugene, who was still in his own uniform and was looking around as if he was lost. I grinned from seeing him since I enjoyed talking with him on the porch of the cabin. He saw the soldier waving him over, then walk over with his food and a small smile on his lips.
"Where have ya been Doc? You almost missed all of dinner." Malarky said aloud as Eugene said down right across from me, looking a bit out of it. He looked like he had a long day since we talked on the porch, maybe he had to train some more or had to talk to someone.
"Captain Sobel was wanting to talk to me and how I was lacking in my running up and down Curahee." He explained, having me hear everyone in the area groan from hearing the news from Eugene. I felt bad for him, seeing the tiredness on his face and now he was more reserved again, even in front of me. This didn't seem like him, not from what I would see.
"He had no right to go after you Doc." Guarnene grumbled from his spot at the table.
"It's fine." Eugene reassured him in a low tone, but Joe shook his head.
"Naw it ain't, Doc. You shouldn't have to get any bullshit from that son of a bitch." Joe explained to him calmly, but he was just as agitated about as the rest of the men were. Eugene just ate his food and not said a word for a moment, looking right at me in front of him and I smiled at me. He smiled right back, without even hesitating for a second and I get warmth going under my skin again. Was it because he was quieter than the rest of them and was not as flamboyant? Or was it that I could see the kindness in his eyes and how he spoke?
But he was slowly drawing me in, slowly but surely he was.
It's been now two weeks since Joe and I came to Camp Toccoa, and since meeting all of the Easy men at the dinner I've been closer to all of them as the days came and went. Although they were on different schedules than me, and they had to put up with Captain Sobel none the less, they would stop what they were doing whenever I would walk by and we would chat for a moment or two. Every single one of the guys in Easy Company had their own personalities that I was picking up on. And the best to talk to was Eugene, whom every called Doc. But I still called him Eugene, it suited him, at least it did to me.
Whenever we would talk, whether it was about medicine or just what we did with out lives before we came to the war, there was a sense of lightness between us. It was like I had no need to be big or bold in front of him, not like the other men that I met at Camp Toccoa. With Eugene, I was fine just being myself. We got to know each other more and more, having me discover that he hated the winter because he was used to the Louisiana sun, he missed his mother's gumbo and her scent of lavender, and he knew how to speak French. I told him more about me since he was so interested, my language for German, my knack for reading books on topics other than medicine, I loved the taste of chocolate and my love for autumn and the changing colors of the trees.
"How is Nurse Liebgott doing here?" I heard behind me, hearing that it was Winters who was speaking to my Head Nurse as I was working on a soldier who came in with a sprained ankle. He twisted it while doing his drills, was brought to me and I was the only nurse in the cabin. I got him a cold wrap and a bag of ice to place on his ankle, which was propped up on a spare pillow.
"Just keep your foot here, soldier and you'll be fine before you know it." I reassured the soldier, whom nodded his head and smile weakly at me.
"Thank you ma'am." He thanked as I heard Winters talk to the Head Nurse some more, having me hear her answer.
"She's my best nurse, sir. She knows her medicine far too well and has done well with all the testing we have given her." The Head Nurse explained to Winters as I walked from his ankle over to the other side of the bed to fill out his paperwork for his injury.
"Colonel Sink wants to know if you believe she is ready to be a combat medic for Easy Company. We are in need of a medic who speaks German, and our own medic only speaks French." Winters explained to the Head Nurse, having me think of Eugene instantly. He did know French since he grew up on the Bayous of Louisiana and that was his second language.
"I understand, sir. I think she can do well as a combat medic. However, I do hope you know that this can be a growing concern." The Heard Nurse warned him, having me pause as I was filling out the paperwork on the clipboard, thinking of how this could be a concern.
"I don't think I'm following, ma'am." Winters stated in a confused tone. I waited as well, wondering what she was talking about and what she meant by concern.
"Sir, if you let her be a combat medic, she would be the first one in this army's history as a female combat medic. That can raise a few questions regarding safety and rights, you know that?" I was frozen in my spot, not thinking about that before. It never crossed my mind that I would be the only female in the Company, let alone the first one in the army to be a combat medic. Was this a huge risk to Colonel Sink? Would all eyes be on me now?
"He understands that situation, ma'am. But he has full confidence in her that she can perform up to the tasks of the other combat medics. She will be trained under our watchful eyes and will have the same information as the others. We only ask if you feel she is ready for this." Winters explained to her softly as I felt a trail of moisture on my skin from my nose to my lip, having me place the clipboard down and reach up carefully. I touched the moisture there on my lip with my finger, pulling it away for me to see as I sighed in frustration and fear: Blood.
Not now.
I rushed away from the patient and over to the back end of the cabin, feeling more blood come down from my nose and I tried so hard not to let it be seen. This was the first nosebleed in months, and whenever I got one, it was going to result in some kind of seizure. I had to calm down, I had to rethink and get my brain working normally again.
tucking away from sight, I sunk down to the floor and covered my nose with both hands, my eyes closing and started to count to ten all over again, the same thing i would do in order to stop a seizure from happening. This was not starting to get more real than I thought. Could I handle being a combat medic now? What would happen if I had a seizure out on the field and I was working with a soldier who was dying at my hands and feet? Would I be able to help them, or would I even die if the pressure and stress went too far. I counted slowly, one…two….three…..
"I think she's ready." The Head Nurse said from her spot, and I could hear her faint as I pulled my hands away from my nose, seeing the blood there and my own heart and brain calming down finally from the near burst of extra energy. They thought I was ready, and I would think Joe did the same though he too knew about my Epilepsy. But was I willing to place my own life and neck on the line for work for the other men. Any time I go out there, I could eventually die from my own disease. But that would mean that I was weak, that I was willing to give into the disease instead of fighting it. I could not afford to do that, not now.
I was ready.
