Thanks for all the lovely comments!

annabanana6 - i promise, very soon :)

All I hear is laughing, which is a welcome change considering the last 72 hours. I know I have been pretty quiet today, but my back has been bothering me and I thought alcohol would mask it, both the psychological and physical pain of it all. I feel like I'm jumping out of my own skin. That day has been playing on my mind. Vivid flashes of Ford and that rifle and Holly's beaming face coming towards me. It makes me shiver all over.

"Gail, are you playing or what? Traci asks as she deals the next hand.

"No, I'm out." I smile at Holly who seems to been glaring at me again. I have noticed her do that a few times in the past hour. It's her you-say-everything-is-fine-but-really-it-isn't" face. She sees right through you.

"Actually, I think I might go to bed". I stand up and kiss Steve on the cheek. I walk past Holly and give her a playful squeeze on her shoulders. I walk through the sliding door into the house. "Night losers".


"Chris! Stop! Bloody! Snoring! I am never sleeping with you again." Ever.

I quietly get out of bed before realising I am wearing only a bra and shorts. I forgot that Chris would be bunking with me, so I quickly throw on a tank top and tip toe out of the room. Who am I kidding? I just yelled at him, nothing could wake him.

I drum my fingers on the door across the hallway then slowly peak in. I had seen a light on so why wouldn't I let myself in?

Holly looks up from her book and pushes her glasses to the top of her head.

"Chris is snoring, can I sleep in here... with you?" Gulp.

"Of course you can." She's says without a second thought. She drops her glasses back over her eyes and goes back to her book.

I casually wander around her room and stop at the photos on her mantle. A few small ones surround a large frame of what I can only assume is Holly when she was a little girl with her parents. They are standing on the jetty down by the lake on this very property. So adorable. I need to break the silence. "Did your parents give you this house?"

"Yes, in a way, they died when I was six." She says not taking her eyes away from her book.

"Oh, I'm sorry"

"That's ok" she shrugs. "It is what it is." I can tell from her tone she doesn't want to talk about it. Change the subject.

I run my fingers over the books in her bookcase, and I read a few of the titles out out-loud.

"'Anatomy of the Blue Whale'". Interesting.

"Haha, 'Forensics for Dummies', maybe I should read this?"

"Maybe you should! My Ex bought me that. It was a joke". "Obviously" I say, not very warmly I might add. Holly scoffs.

I notice an inscription on the first page, so I can't not read it.

'My dearest Hollykins'. Okay, spew.

'I will love you always.' How original.

'Yours, Heidi.' What a stupid name.

I close it quickly and shove it back into the shelf, doing the same with my thoughts. Moving on then...

"Anatomy of the Prairie Dog".

"The animal anatomy books were my dads," she states. Cool.

"The Lesbian Kama Sutra" I hold it up and show it to Holly as if she's never seen it before, though she doesn't even look.

She smirks into her book. "Would you believe me if I told you it was for purely science related purposes?"

"Um, nooooo." I draw I out. Hmm, kinky!

I open the first page and check for the elusive 'Heidi' inscription. Nothing. I place it back in the shelf.

I walk over to the bed and Holly shifts over to make a bit more room for me. I prop myself up next to her.

I poke her book. "Whatcha readin'?"

"It's called 'Go To Sleep Gail'." LOL.

"Funny." I shift down into the bed and lie on my side facing away from her. "Sounds boring. Maybe you should read it to me so I can fall asleep.

I can feel the bed shaking from her silent laughing.

I hear her close her book and hop out bed. I turn over and watch her walk over to the ensuite bathroom. Her hair falls to her shoulders as she pulls the tie, then she removes her sweater and closes the bathroom door. A minute later she opens the door and I quickly turn back over. The scent of her moisturiser wafts through the room. She suddenly jumps on the bed, which propels me slightly into the air. She giggles. She gets under the covers and I hear turn off her lamp. Her weight shifts and I roll against her, as she leans over me to turn off the lamp on my bedside table, but she stops mid air and I feel her hand softly touch the curve of my back between my ribs and hip. Her palm is warm against my skin. She grazes her fingers over my bruise. I'm sure she can see and feel the goosebumps she is giving me.

"Holly? I can hear you thinking."

There are no apologies, she just pulls my top back down, reaches over me and turns the lamp off, and then sinks into the bed and onto her back. I feel her let out a deep breath. For many hours I have been struggling with thoughts of that day, so it's only natural she would be too. It probably doesn't help that I am right next her, a constant reminder of how short life could be. And now my black and blue skin is the last thing she will see before she closes her eyes. It's taking all my will power not to turn over and hold her. Not that I am really into cuddling or anything. Maybe I should just do it? She is always hugging everyone she sees, so what's a hug between friends? In bed?

I'm gonna do it! I turn over and look at her just inches away from me. Her eyes are closed, but I know she is awake. My hands are sweaty and my chest is tight. This can only mean one thing... I am losing my nerve. I move my hand towards Holly's face wanting to brush the hair from her eyes, but I can't. My nerve, it's gone. I am so scared.

I still need to stop her from thinking bad things, so I do what I do best.

"Ni ni Hollykins" I say in a cutesy teasing tone. That should do it.

"Motherfuck..."I can't believe you just kicked me!

She laughs. "Sweet dreams, Gail."