Melting Heart chapter three: FINALLY!
Journal 10- 2-10
It has now been 2 months since I first arrived at the school looking back I have made some pretty good friends. I go to the club as often as possible but to be truthful most of my going is to see mizore ahh M-i-z-o-r-e what a beautiful name.
I stay in there until the sun sets on most nights, this way I can just chat with the group while they are there and then work when they leave. I have found out a lot of interesting things about the members of the club. So much news none what I originally came here to find though.
Apparently yukari is a little genius she is the smartest kid in the school and moka is the second. She is a bisexual girl though this surprised me when I found out though; apparently she has been trying to get both moka and tsukune to love each other + her.
Gin is apparently a true wolf just like everyone has been telling me though it took me until my first month here to see this first hand. I was walking to my tree after a long night at the club and I heard a noise near kurumu's dormitory so of course I went to investigate. So here I am walking in the middle of the night towards a girl's dorm looking for a strange noise and at this point I just start thinking of how much like a cheesy horror movie this sounds like.
I get around to the door and I don't see anything so I start thinking that I was just hearing thing's; nope don't think so. I hear it again a kind of heavy breathing now that I am closer to it. I go over and start searching the walls and then I notice it is coming from above not only that but there is hot steam flowing from the top. I silently start climbing the opposite tree and make sure I climb to the top.
So I am sitting on top looking down and I see a hole in a wall and at this point I am thinking that some one got a hole in their bathroom and the steam and noise is from there, I am only half right. So I start to mosey on down when is see a head a little a way from the hole. That perverted wolf has at some point when kurumu was away drilled a peep hole into her bathroom probably some where with a good view of her bathing but where she cant see it.
He is just sitting there smiling as she takes a hot shower in front of him. Of course being a gentleman I climb down from the tree and I start towards kurumu's room. I get to her room and I knock and all she says to hang on and I hear her getting out of the shower and drying off then she opens the door sees me and of course she gets all huffy and asks why I am here so I say that I just caught someone watching her shower and she says that that is impossible since she put some curtains up when she caught gin spying once. So I tell her a bout the magic peephole and she suddenly goes red and follows me outside where she sees gin.
Next day when I see gin he has a huge bruise on his face in the shape of kurumu's hand. She tells me she appreciates me telling her then she slaps me. At this point I am like WTF but she tells me for all she knows I was peeping too and just wanted gin out of the way.
As for tsukune I discovered that he truly is a nice guy to hang around. He cares a lot for his friends and really would do anything for them. He comes off as a little too emotional to me, not trying to be rude but he is always talking about peace and love sheesh what a hippie. Don't get me wrong peace is something every sane person wants but you don't see me yelling about it 24/7.
Tsukune is also madly in love with moka and it is so obvious surely some one has figured this out by now. I think the other girls figured this out but that just makes them fight for him more which I really don't get.
Moka herself is pretty cool I guess but I just don't get how she hasn't noticed so you know that is really ticking me off.
I keep stalking mizore and I would probably feel bad about it if she herself wasn't stalking tsukune. God she is so freaking cool I mean when I stalk her I normally just hide in a tree but she has thousands of hiding places. The other day moka and tsukune were talking in the halls and right after she leaves tsukune stays back and waits a few minutes looking like he just missed some huge chance or something. Then he leaves and boom out of nowhere mizore just comes out of the air conditioning vent.
God I love her so freaking much she helps me on the club assignments too like for our last edition we were behind time but she and moka were done so they helped the ones who weren't. Moka of course helped tsukune and mizore helped yukari. She came over to me next and helps me on the student advice column which being my first year as a student I don't know what they were thinking assigning me this.
She is cold to touch but that doesn't matter much to me after all I like the cold. She isn't cruel exactly she is more of the shy type but at the same time she isn't spreading the gospel of sun shine daisy's and cute little rabbits either. God why can't I quit thinking of her?
Any ways this doesn't really matter because I still have to end it all I still have to kill myself. If I don't then he will find me and he will kill every one I care about and I don't think I can go through that again.
-almost killed drake.
Tsukune
I have until the end of January to figure out how to get moka to go to the winter festival with me but that still doesn't mean much since I found out about it in July but I still haven't got my chance. *sigh*.
I sling my bag over my arm and start to the main building as always. I keep my head high but still this problem is weighing me down. Moka is still my friend and if that is all she will ever be then I can accept that, but I just cant forget all about her and the possibility of us being together. I keep going over it in my head, the time that she was under yukari's spell and asked me to kiss her thigh.
"Hey dude how are things hanging?"
I look around and do not see any thing, who was that, who just said that? "Who's there where are you? Show your self."
"Up here dude sorry guess that was pretty dumb hold up I'm getting changed be right down."
I look up and see drake putting his shirt on his shirt I forgot that he sleeps next to mizore's room. God how can a person be that obsessed with some one and the other person not notice it, it's not natural. You would think mizore would notice that the boy was head over heels for her. It makes me so sad when a couple isn't together because of a reason like that.
His accent is so American maybe that's it maybe mizore doesn't date foreign. He finally starts climbing down from his tree waving and smiling.
"So tsukune what do we have today huh any tests or any thing I know maybe we have a big club meet."
I smile at him and his morning cheer it was good to be able to stand around and talk to someone who wasn't fighting over me not that I would give my friends up for anything in the world.
"I don't think we have any thing too important just trig notes and the usual school assignments, so there isn't going to be any test's and as far as the news paper club goes we just have to finish printing so that Monday we can start selling the new issue."
He smiles at me and I can tell he wants to talk to me about something and from the way he smiles yet still looks uncomfortable I know that this conversation isn't going to be good.
He notices that I figured him out and he drops all pretense of a smile and just sag's his shoulders. "So you ask moka to the festival yet?"
My eyes widen how does he know that I want to take moka to the festival I hadn't told anyone about it yet. I mean I didn't fawn over moka did I? Was it to obvious that I want to be moka's boyfriend I didn't walk around drooling over her did I?
I mean I like moka…No I love moka but I don't just go around watching her do I? Then again every boy in this school likes moka she is after all the most popular girl in this school. She has perfect looks and she is so kind and treats every one more or less the same. But with me it goes beyond her looks or personality to me its like the sun shines of her skin and her breath is the wind, in short to me moka is my world and she has been since I first met her.
Then again she hasn't shown any sign that she feels the same way she just treats me as friend, then there's inner moka who I also adore just as much as I adore outer moka, I love moka herself not just the outer moka or inner moka to me one with out the other is not moka at all. But inner moka would never want to go out with me after all to her I am nothing but a lowly human and she is a majestic vampire.
"No I haven't asked moka out to the festival or the dance for that matter. I swear I just can't figure out what to do drake it's like I want to with all my heart but when I actually try I can't. Even if the girls would let me have a chance with moka I doubt that I could have the courage to ask her out I mean if it doesn't work out then we might not be friends the way we used to any more." I sigh in defeat finally admitting the fear that has caused me many sleepless nights.
"tsukune I can honestly tell you right now that I am not in the least the person to have a heart to heart with, I mean damn I barely have my own shit handled; screw that I don't have my shit handled, but I can tell you this it is better to risk something than to wait until its too late trust me that is something you can always count on to be true.
I look at him he smiles back at me and I realize that he is right about one thing he doesn't have his issues together you can tell that just by looking at him but I don't think he wants to talk about it. I stop and start thinking about what we know about him so far. He saved ruby, he drinks yokai blood, he is totally smitten with mizore, and he is in the club that's about all we know about drake.
"eh… tsukune why are you staring at me?" he looks on edge and nervous I must have been staring the whole time " I mean I know that I am like totally hot and all but I don't swing that way cowboy."
My face turns red and I look down I didn't think that I was still staring at him. I want to ask him more about himself maybe he has a problem we can help with, I want to but I have a gut feeling that wouldn't be the best idea. Still how can he expect to get over the past if he doesn't acknowledge it?
"all I'm saying is that I have been here for two months going on three and you probably have been her a lot longer than I have so that means you have been crushing on moka big time for a long time. I know that it is intimidating asking a friend out when I was on my own all I did was watch TV dramas."
My eyebrows arch up (TV he hasn't had anything but TV to talk about and to help with that just seems strange).
He sees my questioning gaze and is quick to defend himself "there is nothing wrong with getting life lessons from television. Sure there is a lot of crap on there I will be the first one to admit that but sometimes there is actual truth in that crap. A lot of people see a drama and think that none of that could happen in real life and they are wrong the stuff that gets brought up in drama is stuff that happens everyday."
His face is red after his rant but I see his point and I smile apologetically. I still can't do it though I mean I do love moka but there are so many factors involved here, too many players on this chess board. If I could get to moka there would be her reaction, inner moka's reaction, and the group's reaction, not to mention the fact that she is a beautiful and powerful vampire and I just can't get her to go with me no matter what because I am not worthy.
I have thought about her so much since I came to this school but even more than I have thought about here I have thought of the inevitable truth. I am not worthy of moka's love.
How do I know that though? Maybe moka is just in love with me as I am with her maybe? I mean crazier things have happened.
I shake my head the thought is impossibility and I don't want to become hung on insane fantasies.
"Dude I mean it you should like totally ask her out I mean what do you have to lose, shit you know what scratch that I will tell you what you have to lose if you don't tell her you have your manhood, your love of your life never knowing, risk seeing her in the embrace of another dude one day and you will lose your self-respect."
My nostrils flare I have had enough of this boy "Quit saying dude!" I practically yell at this point " I don't see how my feelings or intentions towards moka is of any concern of yours and further more who are you to talk about going after the love of your life when you don't even try to ask mizore out huh?" my anger quickly fades as I see the sorrow on his face.
He looks down and starts to scuff his feet on the ground and says in the most pitiful and sad voice I have ever heard "I didn't mean to piss you off I was just trying to do what a friend would."
I look away and rub the back of my neck the awkwardness of this moment pressing fully on my consciousness.
I shrug and apologize not having meant to hurt his feelings and also take back my comment about mizore. He smiles trying to hide how hurt I really made him and just waves off my comments.
"So why haven't you well you know, asked mizore out I mean not that I try to get into every ones business or anything but it does look like you like her an extremely large amount?"
He stares at me dumb founded like the answer's obvious which it probably will be. "Dude isn't it obvious? She is totally infatuated with you. Until you find someone she won't move on and she will never give guys like me a bleeding chance." He sighs a little like the truth is an old wound to him "any way I play it over in my head every time I ask her the result is the same, she refuses me because she wants you."
I smile the mood shifting greatly from the previous minute "so I guess that means the real reason you want me with moka so fast is because you want mizore huh?" I ask jokingly
"That is crap and guys who do things like that is crap, doing things to help people just to get what they want is wrong. Yes I saved ruby and asked for blood but that is not the same. I didn't trick her and then use the circumstances to what I wanted. Any one who uses tricks and hidden meanings is crap." He takes a deep breath "I only want to help because you're my friend, if in the end you chose mizore over every one else I would still be yours and her friend, though to be honest I would skulk and act like a two year old for few weeks." He says smiling.
The bell rings then and he shoots off towards the building not even aware like I was that mizore had just heard our whole conversation.
Moka
I wonder what tsukune is up to right about now, he seemed so down yesterday I wonder why? In fact now that I think about it for the past month or so he has been very upset. Is he in trouble?
"You can't stop thinking about him for a minute can you girl?"
Eep I look down at my Rosario normally she doesn't talk to me and when she does it normally is only to alert me to an unavoidable danger.
"Umm what do you mean inner?" I ask sheepishly trying to feign ignorance.
"Don't try to pretend moka, after all we hear each others thought's so it is not like I don't know what you're thinking." She said with the same cool and indifferent voice that I had become so accustomed to.
"It," I blush "its just that I keep worrying about him, I mean except for a few occasions he always seems so happy, but lately all it seems like is that he has some problem."
"Yes as I said before I already gathered that from your thoughts, what I asked was if you couldn't stop thinking about him for a minute."
"Well maybe I….." I stop from saying it not knowing how she will take it "umm inner me how would you feel if tsukune asked me out?"
"I would say that he is a lowly human that does not even deserve to be in our presence." She said so matter of fact'ly, " how ever if you were to ask him which once again reminding you that I can hear your thoughts, you were to ask him which is what you really meant to ask me, I would probably hope to come out during a date or two."
My jaw drops as I struggle to understand what it was she meant, was she saying that if tsukune was to ask he would be treated like a dog, however if one of us asked she would gladly go with him out onto a date?
"That is exactly what I mean foolish girl, honestly I swear some times you are so dense." There was merriment in her voice as she said this.
"But how does that make sense inner me, why would you kick him to the curb if he asked?" I asked gently and quietly as if the walls were listening for the answer.
"its really very simple as a lowly human he has no right what so ever to consider himself worthy enough to ask me out, on the other hand if either of my sides by which I mean you, were to ask him out then that would mean that I wanted it." She said as if it were obvious and completely natural.
"Oh" I could not think of any thing else to say to that, the logic applied to that reasoning was in short "ridiculous".
1 year earlier no ones point of view
There is a knock on the door and she runs to answer smiling happy that there is really hope that she has found her love.
"Mister Kotsubo come in please." She says smiling.
Mizore
"Agghh" I sit up again thankfully I don't go too far this time only a short scene.
"Oh … god" I feel tears slowly frosting on my chin and I push them off listening to the ice shatter on the ground.
There is no more coming and that in it self is a blessing, thank god.
I slide my robe half way down my shoulder then pull it back up abruptly.
Is he still asleep out there?
I go to the window and sure enough I see him chest heaving slightly and his face contorted in pain.
I wonder what could possibly have happened to make him have such horrid nightmares. I wonder if his are worse than mine.
I walk to the bathroom and splash water onto my face breathing heavily.
"So why haven't you, you know, asked mizore out?"
What did he mean by that? I could only hear some of what was being said but from what I saw this drake has some affection for me. But that would not be right I mean I want to have snowflakes with tsukune. (For reference read Rosario +vampire season two book one chapter one)
Still I can't help but to feel flattered that some one who so far isn't a scumbag creep has romantic intentions towards me.
I go to the window and stare at him his hand over his journal as he sleeps.
I notice for the first time how nice his hair looks black as night and smooth. His skin was very pale almost as pale as my own.
But it was hard to appreciate the beauty of his face when it was as twisted as it was now.
Still he is kind of cute I guess not like tsukune but still cute.
I walk back to my bed shutting the lamp off on the way. As I lay down and wait for the grip of sleep to claim me again I start humming to my self an old child hood song from my home land.
"In winter, in blizzard, I wish for nothing better.
I dream of snow and I dream of white, a winter is perfect delight. My love my love, stay in the snow, my one my one please never let go, my love my one the last breath I breath before my eternal sleep let it remind us of the winter's sleet. I wish for you a happy end, I wish for me a fresh beginning. Though soon we melt our snowflakes still remain. In winter, in blizzard, I'll always remember, the heat of our hearts in a world of cold. My dear my dear forever let us dream of snow."
My eyes start to drift after the final verse but before sleep claims me I hear through the walls something that melts me to the bone, a sound so sad I instantly feel lucky that I am not the voicer of it. It is one word moaned with the agony of one who has seen the end of the world and lived past it.
"Mommy"
Drake
It's coming oh god its coming why won't it stop coming, her hand holds mine as she too waits for it. The crimson liquid slowly crawling towards my arm, the tube that houses it is firmly in side my vein. My mouth is sand paper dry; my tongue hurts when it rubs my mouths top. "Mommy please I don't want to please mommy, don't make me mommy please… Please" my eyes are wild and searching for any mercy among them.
She looks at me her face almost mirroring my own her voice once so beautiful is now ragged with a pain that bears no describing " I cant baby I cant."
I know she can't that she would if she could but still I thrash around trying to disconnect the tube that threatens to send the vile liquid into my being.
"Mommy if you love me you won't let them, please mommy you're supposed to protect me… Mommy... Mo- Arrghhhhhhh." The liquid has finally slid into me, the life force of another now sustaining me. Her mouth opens and she starts to shrilly scream with me I feel warmth on my face and I cannot tell whose tears they are: mine or hers.
I bite down deep on my cheek blood filling my mouth and dribbling over the sides. Funny how one doesn't remember these things when they actually happen.
"Oh god baby its okay… shh-shh, its okay mommy's here its okay. Alright baby."
Blood begins to run from my ears, acting as glue that sticks my hair together.
I have left my body now and am staring at my self. Blood has come out of every opening on my body. Even my pants have red stains starting to grow and expand from both sides. My mother thrashes to hold my hand and I slap her screaming in agony.
Then the second drop of blood is introduced into my body.
I now come back to my body and am introduced to this new invader the pain doubling beyond belief.
My mouth stretches far beyond what should normally be expected and instead of a scream coming out the pain has reduced the noise to a steady croak much like static on a radio.
My mother has gotten a hold of my hand and is now trying to console me.
Her hair is now matted to her head and she has blood from where I slapped her.
Her eyes are filled with tears "baby it's almost over don't worry its almost over come on baby, there, there it wont last much longer don't worry."
She is trying desperately to console me but that is nothing more than a losing effort.
"Momma make it stop please mommy mo..." the third drop has now fallen into the tube this time the trail is faster. The drop glides down the leftover of the previous drops so that it instantly falls into my vein.
My eyes swivel in my skull and I begin to thrash faster and stronger. The medical gurney that I am strapped to begins to creak and swivel and I feel hands come from the darkness to strap me down.
She strokes my hair with shaking frail hands. I notice that there are smears of blood over her hands and arms and through the darkness I finally see it. In my thrashing I have hit her multiple times and now her eye is bleeding profusely.
My head roles idly to the left my, consciousness all most completely torn and sleep now threatening to release me from this horrible pain. The packet of blood is still full and I will remain strapped to it until drop by drop it completely empties.
"Status" his voice replies.
"The subject seems to have begun the melding process faster than previous injections." The nurse replies
"Keep us posted"
My mother lays her head on my chest weeping with sorrow. Her heaves rattle through my body and I close my eyes her sorrow ironically starting to ease and settle my own pain.
If my mother could hear my thoughts then what would she find right now would it be a child screaming for it to end, would it be a child who has grown decades beyond his years? Or would she the results of a shattered thought organ that now struggles to hold together one consciousness so that it would have a function to continue? Perhaps if she could peek inside of my head and read my thoughts she would in fact hear and see that all three possibilities are a reality.
Her voice now a croak asks me her "Baby" how am I doing. I don't answer my pain is enough without trying to point out that is useless to ask such a thing when I have only received three drops from a whole bag of blood.
I drift off to the one place I have that they cannot torture me anymore. Sleep comes easy to me especially in the current state I am in. it takes me for less than a second how ever for that is when the fourth drop hits my blood stream.
My body rises as far as the restraints will allow for me to rise. I writher on the gurney turning from left to right, there is a dark patchwork of black and green slowly climbing my arm and god it hurts.
I no longer am able to control my self for her. No longer am I able to hide what I want from her. "I-WANT-TO-DIE KILL ME!"
She shatters when she hears this but I do not care. I continue to scream this well past midnight the same to six words over and over again until my throat bleeds from it. The bag has been emptied by one/fourth and is still dripping.
The villiage clock tolls and midnight has officially come.
I am now five years old.
The dream shifts to another dream a worse dream
"MOMMY"
I wake up my chest heaving and sweat sticking my pajamas to my skin. I turn on the tree and heave and heave until I eventually release bile from my mouth it hits the ground below with a sickening splat.
"Hey"
I look over startled to find mizore sitting on her window sill holding a rag and a glass of water out towards me.
She had a worried look on her face that contrasted strangely with the shadows.
I took the cup washing the taste of bile from my mouth and wiped the excess away from my mouth. She looked at me curiously I could only guess as to why.
"Bad dream huh?" said softly but truthfully this only made me more upset and I had to look down for a minute.
"I know you probably don't feel like talking about it so I'm not going to ask, how ever if you want you can come in and sit for a minute."
With that she turned off the window sill and back into her room.
I cautiously made my way into her room not wanting to abuse the privilege.
I stopped for a moment, shivering like crazy.
Her room had to be below freezing point, seriously what was her ac on. I looked around the room taking in what ever I could. On the walls there were postcards with pictures of what could only be described as a snow kingdom on it.
Her walls were painted white with stickers of snow flakes on it; she had small round rugs blue with white lines, cute.
Her bed was pretty basic so I wasn't exactly curious about it.
She was in the bathroom I could hear the sound of water turning on and then suddenly off. She came out with another glass filled to the top.
She handed it to me again, this time I slowly sipped on it enjoying the cold as it tingled with my mouth, I felt slightly better now that I had some water and time but my hand was still shaking and not from the cold.
She sat down on her bed eying me curiously, her sucker bounced once or twice as she swished it around her mouth. I smiled half heartedly and sat on the couch.
"Your room is nice mizore, one thing is for sure you have it as close to home as monsterly possible."
She smiled slightly at this her sucker slipping upward.
"It's the best I could do." Her eyes were tired but still managed to shine with happiness.
I was quickly losing things to talk about besides her and that would ruin the moment and right now all I wanted was to keep this alive forever.
I folded my hands in my lap and started to twiddle my thumbs as I tried to think of a conversation that I could start, but In all honesty besides these past few months I lived in forests and deserts except for rare journey's into towns and city's.
"I've never actually seen the snow" I stopped my self cursing my stupidity for mentioning that, she doesn't care if I've never seen the snow damn it.
"Oh really?"
My ears perked up instantly, she was talking to me actually talking to me, even if all I had were stupid comments and conversation starters.
"Yeah um when ever the season for snow was coming around I was always in a warm area that didn't get any. It sucked and all but I did see a lot of it on this portable TV I had." Crap now she would probably think I was a bum, why had I mentioned a portable TV as my only way of seeing it.
"You should try to see it one day trust me there is nothing more beautiful than the snow"
Though I could have disagreed I chose not to.
"I grew up only knowing about snow drake, so to me it was hard to imagine a world with out it so I guess you could say as far as snow goes I kind off love it."
I smiled at her feeling my lips rub against my upper teeth in the process.
I loved this, I had spent months wanting to talk to her, to be near her with out it being just another stupid club thing, and now here I was talking to her about snow of all things, I didn't care though I just wanted to continue like this forever sitting on this couch talking to her.
"My mother used to live in a snowy area before she was married, so when I was young she used to tell me all about it."
"In my home land we would always talk about the sunny areas that our mothers had told to us, I guess that was our version of your stories."
I smiled at her again eyes shining happily with glee, but was struck with sorrow at the same time.
We talked for hours after that, at first it was about our different stories of the weather but then we started to talk about other things as well. We talked about how the school was a walking death trap and we talked unfortunately over the many feats of tsukune.
Tsukune
"This article is really going to go over great I can just feel it moka, all the work we've put into it will pay off big time."
She smiles at me and I feel my heart nearly jump out of my chest.
"Tsukune you really did well on describing the fundraiser for the snow festival, I mean isn't it just a perfect school event?"
You have no idea moka just how perfect it could be alright I'm going to do it now, its time to finally do it.
"Moka speaking of the snow festival would you mind-"
"Tsukune I need to see your article"
*Sigh*
Well gin normally doesn't interrupt my leaps at her so its only fitting that now would be the time that he does I mean I can only get so far before he interrupts or someone else does.
"Don't worry tsukune I'll do it, no biggie." Drake says while standing up.
He gets up grabs my article and goes to the desk.
I have a funny feeling he's trying to open the path so that I can finally do it, not that I am complaining of anything.
"So any ways um so yeah moka the snow festival I was wondering if you don't already have plans then maybe we could…"
I feel her before she even speaks and inside I yell in fury but there is nothing I can do about it so I just turn.
"Oh tsukune read my article it's over the different forms of love potions doesn't it just make you happy?" kurumu asks me with a blush.
"Coming through rack, printer ink coming through, oops."
Drake "accidentally" falls and drops the ink on kurumu it strikes her on the head and begins to drip down her head.
"You clumsy idiot, does this stuff even come out?" her eyes are livid and worried at the same time as she tries to rub some of it out of her eyes.
He smiles at me, letting me know that he has my back in this venture and for once I start to gain hope that I might succeed, especially now that I have some one on my side.
I look back at moka and start up for the third time but before I can even ask I feel a presence watching me and I turn to see mizore sitting in the corner a ice shard in hands. I look at drake hoping to see him coming up with a distraction but instead I see the opposite.
He raises his hands and shakes his head sadly and it doesn't take yukari to realize what he is trying to say "Sorry dude you're on your own".
I sigh in defeat and go back to my article as moka watches me waiting for me to continue. But I don't after all what's the point of continuing something that will surely only fail in the end.
I continue working for the rest of the day and to no avail do I succeed so near the end I lay with my head placed on the desk and think about what I could do to get her alone and ask. I know now that drake is on my side until mizore is the one stopping me so I have a sort of half helpful friend in that department. Oh well I guess it's better than nothing so I might as well use it while I can.
"All right club it's over time tonight, were still nowhere near the deadline" gin shuffled past us as he went to retrieve more paper.
I guess tonight's not the night.
Later on that night
Kurumu stands up and stretches her back pops loud enough for everyone to hear. She looks around at the group then exclaims loudly how it isn't right that it's past midnight and were still working. I know what she means and though no one is willing to say it, we know why were here so late. Even though drake is a hard worker, he is slow he doesn't have the right education and he takes tutorials when the rest of us are hard at work. Beyond his education he resists when we try to make him interview students like he is afraid to get to know them.
But right now besides kurumu and me he is the only one still awake, desperately trying to get his portion finished so that we won't have to wait on him. I look over at yukari who fell asleep on her paper, the ink from her pen rubbing across her forehead. Mizore has her head lain back across the chair and is drooling slightly. Moka has her hand against her face and is breathing softly; I blush when I hear it.
Drake looks upset again he probably got stuck on another paragraph or something. It is amazing how one individual can affect the whole group. As I stand to get up to go and help him I am surprised when kurumu walks over and starts talking with him. He looks surprised at first then smiles and starts listening to what she has to say.
I go over to yukari and gently shake her she looks up bleary eyed and tired, I notice how she has finished her column so I tell her to go to bed she nods and instead of going to her room, she lets her head fall back on the desk with a deafening thud. I go to wake mizore but stop and look at drake who is still working so even if it is a mistake I let her sleep. When I get to moka my heart starts to jump and I feel shaky, I bend down and lightly shake her shoulder "moka", I say softly "it's time to get up". Her eyes open and she looks at me with a sort of droopy dog look then stands up and stretches.
"I finished my column so if any one needs help I can" she slurs the rest of her sentence in her sleepy state.
My eyes soften as I see her and I sigh softly. "Moka its okay we finished and the only one left now is drake, so you might as well go back to bed.
She rubs her eye slowly and goes back to her paper. She hands it to gin, she takes a look back at me … she leaves. I don't know why but when ever she leaves it feels like something horrible has entered my life or it could simply be that something like paradise has left it.
Yukari finally sets up and looks around she yawns sounding every bit like the kid she tries so desperately not to be. She blinks a few times then stretch's somehow producing more pops than kurumu. "I can stay behind and help drake so the rest of you can go to bed, if that's okay with you drake?"
He looks at her like she is a gift from god, "of course it's okay with me if it's okay with everyone else that is." She walks over to him and I hear him whisper thank you.
Kurumu looks up and informs us she has just finished. She hands her paper into gin and then leaves.
I walk over to gin and hand mine in he gives me a tired half smile and walks with me to the door. Once outside he turns to me again this time with a serious expression. "You're planning to ask moka to the winter festival aren't you?"
I nod wearily fearing that he might try to take out the competition like he had done when we first met. My hand absently strays to my Rosario bracelet stroking it, he sees and smiles.
"It's not like that tsukune, damn it if I still wanted to take you out I could have done it when you were human and moka wasn't around." He gives me a faint smile "look to be honest moka may be the sexiest damn thing I have ever seen, and yes I may want her but damn it I have spent too damn long chasing after one tail with no success. I need to move on and to be honest I'm considering asking out kurumu, not that convincing her will be an easy task."
That's an under statement I mean with all the groping on her and spying on her that he has done you would think it would be impossible especially with all the groping he did when he trained her this summer. But then again there are at least two instances that might make it where he would have a chance and they were both on the same night. When we went against the safety commission leader kuyo he had saved her and then he nearly died standing in front of a fireball for her.
"I know it's a lost cause but if I can spend a year going after moka I can at least spend a few months going after kurumu right?"
I smile and nod both happy that I might just have lost two obstacles and happy that they might be happy together.
He pats my shoulder and walks down the corridor, whistling and stroking his hair.
I travel slowly back to my room.
Moka
I cant believe I am doing this but desperate time's call for desperate measures. . . at least that is what inner me has told me any way's.
Relax I assure you there is no way that this can fail especially when they all think you've gone to bed.
I take a deep breath and then open the door. I sit on the bed and wait.
Tsukune's room looks so nice.
Drake
Yukari stays with me until around two, god bless her but I couldn't keep her any more after that. She leaves somewhat sluggishly. I go over and stand next to the door.
I go to mizore and watch her sleep. She looks so peaceful right now, I reach out slightly touch her skin, it is so cold and soft I blush. This girl is so, so, so beautiful I just cant quit thinking about her I mean she seems so out of reach sometimes like there is a wall of ice protecting her from other people from other environments, but then she seems like a snow flake, so fragile like one misplaced word or touch could shatter her being, she is my goddess.
I stand back not wanting to wake her anymore; after all she must be exhausted from the nights work. Still I can't help but stare at her but then again I never did have much control over these things. I can't help my feelings and to me they seem so out of pace so fast I mean I've been here for what five, four months? Yet I am totally and completely infatuated with this girl of the thaw.
I look down at my article and try once more to do the work but damn it is so hard. I look at my quotes and sources trying desperately to make them form a good article.
When asked what he thought of the administration here at yokai academy sophomore student hikado mikimori had this to say.
"The administration is really lacking in direction. In my home room I have a teacher who stares out at the sky for most of the class I mean come on what teacher does that. And don't get me started on the enforcers, they, instead of doing their jobs; act like they are the freaking crime bosses. And lets be honest there are so many school rules being violated that yokai academy's punishment threats are nothing more than a sick and twisted joke just the other day I walked in on a lizard couple doing it, right in the back of the building."
Poor hikado enforcers came for him a week after he said this and no ones heard from him since.
The same question was administered to kagome kurosake a junior here at the school. "The headmaster never talks to us, the teachers are always showing off their monster forms, the enforcers are the problem not the solution, and there are totally no rules that we have to follow. I love this administration I think all schools should be this way.
Enforcers never came for her then again she is pretty wealthy and she must have paid them off.
I think I might need to pay these guys a visit, not just to release hikado for my folly but from what I've heard there are quite a few monsters in that group whose blood I have yet to consume. Maybe tonight would be good for that visit. I look over at her again damn she is so beautiful, why I am I staring at her?
I go back to my work and try to forget about her, like that will ever work.
Tsukune
*creak* *click*
"Tsukune, I hope you don't mind that I am in your room".
WHAT THE FUCK
When did she, how did she, why is she in my room. I must be in a dream that or dead. Okay so drake totally was a psychopathic killer and now I am in heaven. Well that figures.
No it's no dream and I am not dead but then how? How am I in this situation? In a way I am kind of mad. I have almost spent two years trying to get a moment alone with moka. Even at my own home it didn't work even though she was the one who came to me.
*Sigh*
I wonder who will burst through the door will it be mizore, kurumu, or will it be a surprise like the exorcist and some mission or else I get expelled. I wonder what curveball fate will strike me with this time.
I look tiredly at moka for once my energy has gone; for once she doesn't charge me with life. Have I given up on our chances together?
"Hey moka, how are you" I say this unenthusiastically, she looks hurt and that; that brings me back to my senses. Why am I always doing this?
Then it hits me I am always doing this. It isn't always fate (key word here always it is still fates sometimes) fault.
I remember the first time I screwed up a possible moment when we were choosing clubs and I tried to get moka to enter the swim club just so I could see her in a swim suit and I should have looked for a club we both could have liked. Then there was when we first met mizore and she wanted us to go snack shopping, she had asked me out, Too bad I let a petty problem get too me so I screamed at her like a child.
Not this time I won't screw this up again, she has done something un-moka like in sneaking into my room; just to get me alone.
I smile now with joy "what are you doing here? I thought you went to bed"
She smiles at the shift in my mood; I smile just because her mouth curved up.
"I… I needed to talk to you, its important." Her voice quivers with a simply adorable flare that I can't help but think increases her beauty.
I begin to walk to her my hand unclenching at my side. Her eyes lift to my face as I walk and she gets off the bed. "Yes moka" I ask softly almost with out breath. She looks directly into my eyes; her eyes have become soft and warm like melted chocolate.
"I just... I"
She slips her hands onto my face and her warmth radiates through my body.
She move her head towards me; I believe she is about to bite me, it has happened before in a moment like this.
"I have wanted to do this for a long time tsukune" I don't know how to explain the feeling I get when moka's warm lips press against my dry ones; I do however know how to describe the look of uncertainty on her face.
I wrap one arm around her spine and the other I run through her hair, her eyes widen then close as I press my lips firmly to hers. I pause and look at her in a new light. She isn't my goddess, she is not my radiant sun, she is not my angel, my savior, she is not anything that I have thought she was before, and she is so much more. There is no way for me to say what she is to me, but in this moment I realize something I think I have been to foolish to acknowledge for a long time now; my life would be nothing if not for her presence, and I don't mean that the way I have always told my self that , I mean that my life from birth to now and if I had not come here and had married a different woman; all that would mean nothing because my fate is tied to moka, life is moka.
Her face is flushed and she is near tears, I am glad that some one as with so little worth can at least do this for her, make this reaction for her; tears of joy.
My hand strokes her hair and she presses her self against me, her arms wrap so tightly around me that it hurts; I love it. Her breath is cool on my neck and mine is hot on her hair, a perfect union.
Why has this taken so long? Why would fate do this? Stop this magical thing from happening, stop us from happening? Then it hits me that fate was helping me always helping me. It helped me to find moka, it helped me to find friends, and then it used those friends for a great purpose. Fate used my friends from stopping this because I simply was not ready. I was still unaware of it all the debt I owed for moka, the way's that I had taken her for granted. Fate knew this and it had used all of my friends Gin, Drake, Yukari, Ruby, Mizore, and Kurumu, especially Kurumu, to stop me from being whole until I could treat my other half with the respect and love that she deserved.
It doesn't take years to finally see your miss doings; sometimes it can happen in just one minute. For me all it took was seeing the woman I loved do something she was embarrassed to do, all it took was moka setting in my room and on my bed.
"Tsukune would you go to the winter festival with me?"
"Yes"
End of Chapter three
Authors note: I finally finished this chapter. It took me from September to April 3, 2011 just to finish this scene. The chapter main body took only about two weeks due to my schedule. But this scene was so worrisome I mean getting together the main couple of the series when they still aren't together in the manga. I had to listen to my cousin who with out her help I could never have done this it was she who suggested that moka should be the one to finally instigate it and she should sneak somewhere that no possible or should I say plausible interruption s could happen.
Okay now as I said this scene is important so if there are any of you who would have done it differently then when you reply I would love to have you send me your own version of the scene in-fact any scene you want I would love your input.
My cousin has brought to my attention that there is no ways that kurumu and mizore are gon'na take this laying down. Well yes and no. you see I tried to set up a way for both mizore and kurumu to have a way to cope with this so please enjoy chapter 4. REVIEW PLEASE.
