Memories and Discoveries.
I jerked awake when I felt something crawling up my arm. I instantly started brushing at it frantically. Behind me, I heard a chuckle. I looked back at an amused Mello as he laid back with an arm resting under his head.
Why are you laughing? I breathed.
Because you just jerked awake without warning and began freaking out.
I would ve sworn something was crawling up my arm. That s the only reason why I freaked out My cheeks began warming up some.
He chuckled some more. That was me. This feel familiar? He lightly traced his fingers up and down my left arm, giving me goose bumps. His bare fingers were unusually warm compared to my own skin.
Why were you doing that? I brushed his fingers away, blushing a little more.
I was bored. I had been awake for fifteen minutes with nothing to do. That at least slightly helped me with my physical boredom while I laid in thought. He sat up against the headboard.
Why didn t you just get up?
You were still asleep and using me as a pillow. I thought I should actually be nice to you this once.
I turned myself to where I was facing him, sitting on my knees. You thought? This once? So, does that mean you aren t naturally nice to me anymore?
Yes. Wait, what? No, that s not what I-
Are you blushing? Mello, are you embarrassed? How cute!
I don t blush! He turned his head away from me.
But you are! Lemme see! Come on, Mello. Please? I grabbed the sides of his face while giggling and trying to talk him into looking at me, but he pushed my hands away and kept his face out of view. I tried looking around to see his face again. He pushed my face away with his hands. I attempted to grab his hands, earning my wrists being captured. After playfully struggling a little more, we both stopped when our foreheads connected and rested on the other s. We sat there for a moment, only looking at each other. I saw an emotion flicker in his amazingly electric blue eyes before it vanished and turned to confusion. His annoyed expression had softened. My smile faded to almost nothing. He slowly freed my wrists, allowing me to back away from him at a slow pace.
I, um, I m sorry. I shouldn t have tried-
It s fine. He got up, ditching his shirt as he went to the dresser. I sat in the bed, feeling slightly odd about the feelings I had just experienced looking in his eyes. Something deep, deep in the back of mind said that my little childhood crush on him hadn t vanished like I thought. I brushed it off, though, promising myself that it was a lie.
Hey, when are you guys getting up! Tease slammed opened the door, instantly smirking when she caught sight of us. Hey, why do you two look so weird? You look like you ve done something you re ashamed of.
Would you get out? Mello shouted furiously.
No! I m bored! Tease jumped on the bed next to me, landing on her stomach.
Could you at least put some pants on? You re showing off some of your tanned ass. I smacked her butt with a chuckle.
Oh, hit me again. I like it oh so much. She pretended to plead. I smacked her again, both of us laughing incredibly hard.
You both disgust me. Mello mumbled as he got his clothes out for the day.
Don t pretend you don t want a piece of this, blondie. Tease joked, pointing at herself when she sat up. He rolled his eyes at her and stormed to the bathroom.
Man, you really do piss him off I noted. It was my turn to change. I went to the dresser, pulled out one of Matt s shirts I often borrowed, a plain black bra, and gray skinny jeans. Not caring she was in the room, I began changing.
Are you try to seduce me, dear Emily? I heard from behind.
No, but if I was, would it be working, dear Taylor?
You know it, sexy.
I chuckled as I shook my head at our stupidity. I checked out how my outfit looked. Matt s shirt fit amazingly well in the torso, but my shoulders were much smaller than his, making the sleeves fall off of them some. I smiled, pulled my make-up bag out, and began painting my face. Just as I finished my eyeliner, Mello came back in.
Out. He grabbed Tease s nightgown and led her to the door.
Ooh, you gonna try something with your best friend s sister or something?
Shut up. He shut the door in her face and locked it.
Okay, that s kinda scary. You re not really going to try something, are you? I winked at him playfully as I applied my mascara.
No. I m just irritated about something. He sat on the edge of the bed.
Oh. Do you want to talk about it? I leaned against the dresser as I looked at him. He didn t even look up at me.
No.
O-okay. Well, if you ever need or want to talk about something that s stressing you out, I m always here for you. Just so you know. I smiled a little before heading toward the door. I placed my hand on the metal door knob when his voice rang through my ears again.
I ll be leaving at five this afternoon. I m not sure when I ll be back.
Where will you be going?
It s none of your concern.
Oh. Should I wait up for you if you come back late?
No.
Oh. Alright then. I sighed lightly as I unlocked the door, and went out to meet up with the others. Matt sat on the couch, his nose practically pressing against the screen of his DS. I threw myself down next to him, watching him play Super Mario. A few minutes of silence went by as two other guys came in the room with us. I finally snapped, my thoughts overriding me and driving me insane.
Okay, Matt, I have to ask you something.
Yeah, what? He didn t take his eyes off the illuminated screen. I pursed my lips, taking the device out of his hands. To spare him any more irritation, I paused it for him.
What is it that Mello is going to do at five that could keep him out so late?
I have no clue. Nothing has been said to me.
One of the guys laughed a little. We snapped our head over at him and the other guy. I cleared my throat loudly, letting him know I heard his chuckle. He glanced up at me from the cards he was holding, smirking in amusement.
Your little boyfriend really didn t tell you anything?
He s not my boyfriend. And no. When I asked where he was going he said it was none of my concern and refused to talk about it. Do you know what he s up to?
Of course I do. It seems you two and that other chick, Tease, I think, are the only ones who are clueless.
Well, will you tell me? I m kind of worrying about him over here.
All I can tell you is that Rod favors him when it comes to this kind of job.
After the way he got in, I d favor him, too. The other guy added as he scanned his hand of cards.
Fine, whatever. Will you at least tell me how he got in, then? I crossed my arms under my chest.
Once his highness leaves. If he hears us talkin about it, we might as well be diggin our own graves. The first guy said. The other guy nodded his head in agreement. I huffed, blowing my hair out of my face. I tossed Matt s game in his lap as I got up again.
It s so irritating being clueless all the damn time! I groaned as loud as I could as I left the building. Checking my surroundings, I rounded the corner of the old building. I leaned against the wall as I pulled out a picture from my pocket.
Man this seems like it was forever ago I smiled lightly as I gazed down at it. Tease was standing next to Mello, giving him bunny ears. Mello stood there, clueless to her actions, a prideful smile lighting up his features. Near stood in front of me, his pure white hair being twirled between his fingers. A somewhat bored expression was drawn on his face. I stood next to Matt, arms resting behind my head lazily. Matt clutched a video game in his preteen hands, forcing his attention away from it long enough for the picture to be taken. In the center of it all was none other than L. A half smile lingered on his thin, pale lips. His right arm was draped over Mello s fragile looking shoulders. I allowed another burdened sigh to escape before placing the picture back in my pocket.
Oh, L why? Why is all of this happening? Why did Kira appear? Why did you have to challenge him? Why, oh, why did you have to die? I slid down the freezing cement wall and clutched my knees to my chest. Your death brought misery to all. Not just by you no longer walking with us, but it gave Mello another reason to fight with Near. Everything that has happened from the moment you died has been nothing but misery. I m sure there is no set happiness in the near future
I clutched the golden cross that hung around my neck. I hung my head down as memories of L s visits to Wammy s flooded my mind. I shut my eyes, allowing myself to become lost in the good days of my childhood. The times when Mello would only bicker with Near. The times Kira was just a small threat rather than a full blown enemy to us. The times when Alternative was with us. The times when Beyond Birthday was with us. Beyond Birthday the first man to ever take Tease s heart hostage. I wonder, where did he go? Heaven? Hell? Or neither? I once heard him talking about those gods of death and a power he shared with them. What the hell were they called? Shinigamis, I think. What power could he possibly have shared with those creatures of darkness? An inhuman way to kill, just as Kira does? Perhaps something different? I wonder
En? What the hell are you doing out here in the rain?
Huh? I blinked furiously. Looking around I realized the lighting in the sky had darkened and rain was falling down from above. I stood up, staring at my horribly drenched outfit. I wiped my finger under my eye to see that my make had begun running down my face.
Envy!
I snapped my head in Mello s direction. He was standing under an umbrella, dressed as though he was readying himself to leave when he found me. He held his hand out to me. I took it, walking under the umbrella with him. Though his voice was full of irritation when he spoke, his face read that of one who was concerned.
What are you doing out here in the rain?
I came out earlier to think some, and I guess I got to carried away in my thoughts. I m sorry.
It s ok. Just be more aware of your surroundings. You ll be lucky if you don t get sick soon. He tightly put an arm around my soaked shoulders as we walked back inside. He tossed the open umbrella down to the ground as we walked passed those who were in the main area.
Whoa, you look horrible, Sis!
Because that s what a girl always wants to hear from someone. Shut up, Matt. I stuck my tongue out at him as we continued walking to our room.
Mello opened the door for me. I smiled politely as I walked past him. He remained in the doorframe as I opened the drawers for dry, clean clothes. I glanced back at him through my thick hair to see he was watching me. I blushed lightly, wondering what he could be staring at. I stood up straight after finding a black tank top and pink and black plaid lounge pants to change in to. We locked eyes. He looked very bothered by something. He was trying to hide his inner confliction, but the way his eyes shimmered and brows furrowed every now and again gave him away.
Mello, what s wrong?
I have to leave in a minute.
I dropped the clothes on the bed as I walked to him. You don t want to do whatever this is, do you?
No. I don t. He moved to shut the door quietly. When I reached him, he hugged me tightly. I didn t know why, but I hugged him back anyway. I felt him pet my head, then play with my dripping hair as I stood in his arms, and him in mine. Suddenly, he pushed some hair away from my ear and whispered to me.
I ll explain everything when I get back. I promise I will. I just hope you don t see me any differently then you did before. As abruptly as he hugged me, he let go and began walking off. I quickly grabbed his hand, pulling him back to me. I laid my free hand on his chest when he turned around.
I don t know what you re doing, or where you re even going, but, please, be careful. I don t want you to come back injured, alright?
No promises. He avoided my gaze. I reached up, gingerly placing my fingertips on his cheek. He guided his eyes to mine.
At least try, then? Either way, I ll be here waiting for you, Mel.
Mel? You haven t called me that in years. He leaned down, brushing his lips against my forehead. I ll be back tonight. If you re still awake, I ll tell you everything. Goodbye, En. He turned on his heel to leave. Our fingers that had laced together refused to break apart. Once he got far enough, though, they broke. Mello glanced back at me before shutting the door once more, the smallest hint of a smile playing on his lips. Then, I was left alone in the bedroom. I placed a hand over my heart, praying silently to God that Mello would be kept safe on what ever mission he was going on.
After changing, I remained in the bedroom. I found my iPod buried under some scattered papers and decided to listen to some music while I doodled random drawings. I had half a paper filled with epic drawings of band names, rainbows, sayings, and music notes, when I saw Tease enter the room with a tray of food. I sat up, pulled an ear bud out, and chuckled lightly.
Playing room service now?
No, I just felt like being nice. And I was pretty sure Matt was going to take your dinner if I came and I got you instead of just bringing it. She sat the tray by my side.
Oh. Well, how sweet of my other half. I picked up the loose meat sandwich, wondering who made it and how quickly they made it. Risking getting sick later in the night, I took a bite.
Well, since you seem like you re going to stay hoarded up in here all night, if you need anything, just text my cell. I ll bring you whatever you want. She smiled, getting up to leave.
Tease, wait. Can we talk about something that will probably end up being a touchy subject?
Huh? I guess so. What s wrong? She sat back down. I pushed the tray away from us, grabbed a pillow, and began the conversation.
Beyond Birthday I heard you two talking once about a power he had. A power that only Shinigamis could possess. What was he talking about?
She glanced at the ground, her hair falling and covering her eyes. That power he said it would frighten most to all people, but I found it really cool and rather interesting. She tucked her hair behind her ear. Her eyes glazed over as she recalled the conversation she had with him.
Why would it have frightened people, Tease?
The power he had resided in his eyes. His eyes those ruby orbs that hinted at mental instability She smiled lightly, only to fade back to her straight face when she resumed speaking. He had the exact same eyes of a Shinigami. That meant when he looked at you, floating just above your head, he could see your true name and how much time you had left until you died.
W what? How do you know he wasn t lying to you? I mean, I doubt he ever lied to you, but
He told me your name, Emily. Your whole name.
Didn t you know it, though?
I only knew your first name at the time that he told me. The next day I asked what your last name was.
So that s why you acted all weird after I told you.
Mm.
Where do you think he ended up, then?
Her expression grew dark. What do you mean?
Sharing the eyes of the gods of death must ve put him in a tough position for the after life. Killing those people probably made it worse
He only chose those who were going to die soon anyway. If anything, he did them a fucking favor. She spoke loudly and harshly.
I wasn t trying to offend you, Tease I m sorry for even bringing this up. I got up and began walking around the room.
If you weren t trying to offend me, don t bring it up. You knew how I felt for him, how I still feel about him, but you did it anyway. She stalked out of the room, slamming my door shut. A second later I heard the echo of her door slamming shut as well. I flew backward on my bed with a huff. I felt horrible for pissing her off. She was probably crying in her room now because of me. Damn it all. I looked at the clock on the night stand.
12:01... I sat up. Mello where are you? Please, be alright I don t know what we would do if something happened to you.
Well, luckily nothing happened this time, so there s no need to worry yet.
I snapped my head over to him as he tossed his jacket down by the door and shut it. Becoming over-joyed to see he was alright, I jumped off the bed and hugged him. My arms flew around his neck and my head buried into his chest.
Welcome back. I m so glad you re okay! I had a lot of bad thoughts run through my head while I listened to music next time, I m making Matt talk to me so I don t worry myself again.
He pet my head as one of his arms slid around my waist to return the hug. You don t need to worry about me. I can take of myself. Prying me off of him, he ditched his vest and shoes. I crawled on the bed and watched him as he went through the dresser.
Are you going to tell me now? I m wide awake, and you are, too, so you can t tell me to go to sleep or say that you re too tired. It s unavoidable right now.
Unless I have no clue what you re talking about. He didn t even look up.
You re a liar. I sat up, hugging his pillow to my chest.
Excuse me? He straightened up.
You promised you would tell me what you were doing tonight. You said you would explain everything. I know you haven t forgotten that yet. Mello, I want to know. Please?
He sighed loudly. He sat on the edge of the bed, resting his arms on his knees. I don t know how to explain it without freaking you out.
Just tell me. I already promised I wouldn t see you any differently.
Alright, alright. He ran a hand through his hair. I got in the mafia by doing something the others couldn t. I was able to locate a target they couldn t track and do the deed they deemed impossible for me. The deal was that if I brought Rod the head of that guy, I could be one of them. I was able to carry it out. I found the guy, cut his head off, and dropped the bag in front of Rod when I returned. Ever since then, I ve been the number one assassin for him. If I don t do it, they ll kick me out
I watched him for a minute. He was visibly shaking. I moved the pillow away, scooted over to him, and grabbed his hand. His hair continued to cover his eyes as he glanced at my hand upon his.
I never wanted to do it. I m killing people that have friends that love them. People that even have families. I just fuck, I don t know. This is the only path that I have, but I hate doing the things that I do.
I m sorry, Mello. I m so sorry that you have to do that. It s horrible that Rod makes you do such a monstrous crime, but you have to do it. I laid my head on his shoulder. I understand.
You can t possibly still treat me the same.
I can. And I will. You re my best friend, Mel. Nothing can change that. Nothing at all. I squeezed his hand lightly when he turned his hand around to hold mine. He lifted my head off his shoulder, going to the dresser. He began changing into lounge pants, not even caring I was in the room. I laid back against the pillows, looking at the ceiling. I rolled on my side when I felt the bed dip down on his side. For the first time, I saw the bags under his eyes. I felt guilt run through me. I wasn t sure why, but I did. When he noticed I was staring, he offered a small smile. I smiled back, pushing his bangs apart. I leaned up, planting a gentle kiss on his forehead. I leaned down to his ear.
Goodnight, Mel. I ll see you in the morning. I looked back at him, to see his reaction, but he was already asleep. I smiled at his peaceful face before laying down and trying to rest myself.
~/ AUTHOR S NOTE. \~
Whoa! This was a super long chapter. I didn t really realize how long it was when writing it I m sorry if you don t like long chapters! :P I m also sorry I didn t update this. I get writer s block very easily a lot. It may be awhile before Chapter Five comes out because of that. My deepest apologies! Please, keep reading and check for updates on this story often! I ask for reviews, too, please. They help inspire me to write more!~ :D
