Annoy Dante!

If Vergil had to endure this, so does Dante. Hey, fangirls! He's over here! Quick Dante, wear this false mustache!

Pick the pepperonis off of his pizza before he can get a chance to open the box

Tell him Vergil is hotter, smarter, and cooler, and… blah blah blah…fangirlism…

When he asks if there's anyone better-looking than him, say "Vergil"

Compare the Sparda twins to raspberries; Dante is the red raspberry while vergil is the blue raspberry

Call him an albino like you did with Vergil in the Vergil Chapter

Throw his strawberry sundaes into a fireplace and make him watch

Sing I'm too sexy for my shirt, too sexy for my shirt at the beginning of Devil May Cry 3

Show him the reboot version of himself

Buy him DMC: Devil May Cry for his birthday

Ask him if he's ever been to church

Ask him how bad it hurt

You know the item Holy Water? Yeah, spray him with it to see if it hurts him

Say "Bad Dante!" if it does

Tell him to cosplay as Inuyasha and get Vergil to be Sesshomaru. Arkham can be Jaken while Lady and Trish can be Kikyo and Kagome

Force him to choose between Trish and Lady

Speaking of Kagoe, play the song Kagome Kagome while he's sleeping

If you actually scare him, good job!

If not, make him read the creepypasta

Lock him in a room with Patty and a broken TV while her show is on

Remember that cat deon you fought in DMC 1 (It's called shadow I think)? Name it Snuggle and cry when he kills it

Call PETA on him

Before he fights Mundus, force him to gouge out those red gems and sell them on ebay

Sell him amulet on ebay

Watch Arkham or Vergil buy it

Put Justin Bieber CDs in his jukebox

Tell him it complements his girly ice cream

Watch the demons laugh at him at the start of DMC 3 when he turns on his jukebox

Watch NO ONE take Dante seriously