Chapter 4: Exit Agenda

"We're going to have to let you go," said Robin. As soon as Robin finished the sentence, Verner leaped up onto his office chair and pointed an accusatory finger at Robin.

"TRAITOR!" he proclaimed. "TREASON! DEFECTION! DEFECATION! URINATION! NECRONOMICON! AND OTHER THINGS ENDING IN 'ON!' YOU'RE THE ONE THAT'S FIRED, TWEET-TWEET-TWEET!"

"Actually," said Cyborg, "To fire a Titan, you have to take a vote. We already took one and it was unanimous."

"Not to mention," said Starfire, "that Beast Boy acquired this tape of you having a tea party with some stuffed animals—"
"So? Is it really so terrible that I have tea parties at my age and gender?!"

"—and Slade."

Raven looked at Beast boy and—holy crap—she smiled.

Verner let out a sad sigh of much profuse sadness, and said, "Alright, but before I go, I have to do my exit agenda. Until my exit agenda is complete, I still have power."
"Exit agenda?" questioned Robin, as denoted by the obvious question mark (duh).

"It's a rule I added to the Awesome Rainbow Happy Ninja Squad Constitution while I was still the leader."
"So what is this exit agenda?"
"It's a to-do list with 263 items."

One month later, the Titans were on #14 of Verner's agenda. The preceding items were all obeyed, for fear that the Titans would be sued by someone (don't ask me who, Verner just said that they would be sued if they didn't). The first thirteen went something like:
1. Raven's wardrobe will be changed to match that of princess peach toadstool and stay that way forever and ever and ever.

2. Robin will eat five light bulbs.

3. New names:

Robin: Chinese food

Starfire: Chinese food

Cyborg: Chinese food

Beast Boy: Chinese food

Raven: Cheetos McWifey

4. Verner will get a pet dragon named "Chinese" (#3 and #4 often conflicted).

5. The Tower will be covered in endorsements for Tampons.

6. The awesome rainbow happy ninja squad will now be the super duper omg yay awesome rainbow happy ninja squad

7. The ARHNS (excuse me, SDOMGYARHNS) anthem will now be the oscar mayer hot dog song.

8. Verner is no longer awesome; he is now flippin' awesome.

9. Fleegleschnorp (Nobody's figured that out yet, so they skipped to #10)

10. Blingerdargen (Nobody's figured that out either, so they skipped to #11)

11. "Awesome rainbow happy ninja squad, up, up, and away—cheetos!" is now "Super duper OMG yay awesome rainbow happy ninja squad, up and at 'em—Doritos!"

12. Starfire will no longer be Tameranian; she is now Santa Claus.

13. Beast Boy is now only allowed to change into the Easter Bunny.

#14 was the hardest so far; they had to change the tower from a "T" into a semicolon. Of course, that had to be completed before the fifteenth would come up…which Beast Boy was lovingly altering.