Administrator: Doctor Rimon Nebun

Subject: Warforged Unit 994-Cy AN-546

Year: 994 YK

Overall Situation: Negative

Additional Notes:

At the council's insistence, I am stepping down from official work on Unit 994-Cy AN-546 to help on Project R******** (see folder P-CY-993-34). Subject shall continue to be trained by Captain Hoffman, while I remain as a supervisor.

Subject continues to train, but has begun to display erratic behavior in the past three sessions. Captain Hoffman has requested a brief pause in the testing to help acclimate the subject. His request has been accepted. There will be no training today.

. . . . . . . . . .

As I enter the training room, I look about. I do not see Wil or Bastion. I see only some rope scattered on the floor. It will probably be used in today's lesson.

Lesson...

I am still...frustrated with my last lesson with Sir. It has bothering me for several days, yet I do not know why. Why is any human, even a crippled infant, more valuable than me? I have no answer to this question, yet it still bothers me. It has also become harder to train with Wil. My mind is busy trying to answer–

THUD. A weapon strikes me in the back, and I fall to the floor. All thoughts vanish from my mind except those of combat. Immediately, I roll and come up on one leg, facing my attacker. I see Wil, standing behind me with his normal smile, holding a club in his only hand.

"Surprise, rookie! An enemy isn't going to let you pick your fights! Let's see what you've got!"
I immediately scan the room, looking for Bastion. I see him, hanging from the ceiling, waiting to ambush. I pretend to not notice him, and charge Wil. As I run, I seize some of the rope laying on the ground.
"You're using your surroundings. Good!" Wil remarks as he swings with his club. I hold the rope between my hands and use it to block his swing. He swiftly backs up, and I use my advantage to back him towards the wall.
A ground-shaking tremor tells me that Bastion has joined the fight behind me. I roll to the right, the side of his missing eye, as something large swings at where I was standing. Wil dodges to the left, putting Bastion directly between him and me.
For a moment, Bastion cannot see me. I use that moment to charge him, catching him off-guard and knocking him down. I move over him to attack Wil–

THUD. Wil has thrown his club at me. As I recover from his unexpected tactic, he draws a short sword, and slashes at me. I block with my rope, but the blade cuts through and hits me in the shoulder. The edge is dull, but it still leaves a mark.
I throw the useless rope at Wil, and as he struggles, I punch him. He manages to avoid my fist, but only barely.

As we face each other on equal footing, Wil lowers his sword, and smiles. "Excellent job, rookie. This session is now over." I lower my fists, and Bastion rises from the ground to stand beside me. The fight has ended as swiftly as it has begun.

"Excellent job, rookie. You kept an open eye during the fight, and more importantly, you kept a clear head. You had complete control over that fight, and I'm proud of you for that."

I feel a sense of pleasure at Wil's compliment.

But Wil continues, his smile gone. "So why haven't you been like this during our other practices? Your swordsmanship has become careless. You've lost the last fifteen games of chess, due to poor planning and bad moves. Even Bastion can see you're struggling with something, and he's only got one eye."
Bastion speaks. "You failed to hit anything during your last archery practice, despite proceeding to advance level faster than any other Warforged. Something is distracting you."

I am torn between my pride at my recent victory, my frustration at my distraction, and...some new feeling. Shame. Shame for hiding my problem from someone who could help me.

Wil puts his hand on my shoulder. "Look, rookie. I'm not like Nebun. I know you guys can think and feel, just like everyone else. So like everybody else, you need to communicate."
I think about my problem, my unsolved question. Perhaps Wil can help me answer it.

"Wil, why is a human more valuable than a Warforged? I can do everything a human can, yet I am less valuable. Why?"

Wil is surprised by my question, and scratches his head. "Well, I suppose that's because, in a way, you were created to protect people."

I am confused. "I am created for war. I am made to fight without hesitation or remorse. I am not created to protect."

Wil smiles. "Actually, that's not exactly true. Soldiers do not fight to kill. They fight because they believe in a purpose, and are willing to die for it. Warforged have a purpose too, though they have less of a say in it."

I am even more confused. My face must have shown it, because Wil continues: "The purpose of the Warforged is to be able to have cheap, mass-produced soldiers, so fewer people have to actually fight and die on the battlefield. It's no small wonder you should value others above yourself. You were meant to help them."

I understand...slightly. Yet my full question is not answered.

"So I am to save any ally or friendly civilian, no matter the cost? Even at the cost of my self?"

Several minutes pass as Wil remains silent, pondering my question. Finally, he turns to me, and slowly answers. "No, I don't think you should. You can help far more people by living than you can by dying. A soldier who doesn't do his duty is useless, but a dead soldier is useless, too. You have to decide when it is best to risk your life to save another's, or to save yourself to protect others."

Wil's answer makes sense. I understand now. I have more than a purpose. I have a reason to fight. To protect my allies, be they human or Warforged.

I feel... Peaceful. It is strange that understanding war should make me feel this way, but it is still a nice feeling.

"I understand now. Thank you, Wil."
"Anytime, rookie." Wil hits me on the back, gently. "Now, how'd you like to play a game of chess?"

-to be continued-

I don't claim to know anything about the D&D combat. But I would still greatly appreciate any feedback anyone has. Thanks for reading!