January 1993
They were sitting in the hospital cafeteria sharing lunch. It was rare that they actually had time together while at work, so they both chose to spend it together instead of at a table with a group of friends. They were just finishing up when they heard a page for Dr. House over the intercom.
"Even after more than two years, it's still weird to hear you called House," Lisa commented watching as he grabbed the last few fries off her plate. He shoved them into his mouth with a wide grin as he stood up and pushed in his chair under the table.
"Gotta run, Cuddy," he smirked, "If they're paging me on the loudspeaker, it must be important." He bent down and placed a quick kiss on her lips, "I'll see you later, Cuddy."
"Very funny, House," she stuck her tongue out at him. Once he had exited the cafeteria, she gathered their trays and took them over to the conveyor belt. Heading back up to the resident lounge, she went to study before her next set of rounds.
Lisa was brushing her teeth when she heard the front door to the apartment close. "Greg?" she called out pausing with the toothbrush in midair. She stepped back from the sink and listened for a response at the bathroom door.
"Yeah. It's me," he called back. His reply was followed by some muffled thuds. Then he appeared in the bathroom doorway.
"Where have you been?" she asked leaning over to spit out the last of the toothpaste foam. Setting down her toothbrush, she cupped a hand under the stream, bringing the water to her mouth and rinsing, swiping the excess water from her mouth with the back of her hand before cutting off the tap.
"Out," Greg replied.
She arched her right eyebrow scrutinizing him as she turned to face him. Her back rested against the counter. In a frustrated tone, she asked, "I know that you were out. Where were you out and why?"
He stared at her a minute contemplating whether he should try to tell her a lie. She could see that he was considering it before he finally spoke up. "I wasn't anywhere. I was just walking along the river," he took in a deep breathe before continuing, "I'm suspended next week, and I got put on probation for the next six months."
"What? Suspended!" she exclaimed reaching out to grab his upper arm, "What the hell happened? Why are you on probation? Is that why you were paged?"
"I performed a procedure to save some kid's life," he murmured staring down at her hand that held onto his arm.
Confused, she questioned, "If you saved someone's life, why the hell would they suspend you?
"No one believed that I was trying to help him. I couldn't just watch him die!" Greg said with fury.
"Wait. Did you not have permission? What if you were wrong? Greg, there are rules in place for a reason-" she interjected.
"What the hell, Lisa! You're supposed to be on my side. Not theirs!" he shouted, "I can't help it that I work with a bunch of idiots too stupid to diagnose-"
Lisa removed her hand from his arm and walked away from him. She cut off his sentence looking at him sharply, "Don't use that tone with me. I told you that I don't like it, and I will not have you talk to me like that."
"I'll talk to you any damn way I please," he responded petulantly.
"No, the hell you won't," she moved to walk past him, but he blocked her path.
"Move," she hissed glaring up at him. Towering over her, he simply stared back.
"Greg, get the hell out of my way," she gritted out. When he didn't respond, she shoved him hard in the chest and pushed him to the side. After she brushed past him, she headed down the hall towards their bedroom.
He followed her down the hall and stopped in the doorway. Leaning against the doorjamb, he watched as she moved around the room getting ready for bed. She grabbed her retainer putting it in her mouth and pulled back the sheets. Getting into the bed, she covered her head with the blankets.
"That's it? Don't you have anything else to say to me?" Greg goaded moving towards the bed, "Well, it's good to know that I can't count on you!"
"Shut up!" Lisa shot up causing the covers to pool at her waist. "I have always been here for you when you need me, even if you're too stubborn to admit it," she scoffed. "What do you want me to say Greg? That I'm glad that you're ruining your career? That it's great that you're putting strain on our relationship, our marriage? That I'm happy for you and your little God complex?" she retorted.
"No," he sighed slumping down on the bed next to her. "I want your support – to be on my side this time. I saved the kid's life, Lisa. He was going to die, and I knew what was killing him. They wouldn't give me permission to save him, so I did what I had to. Would it be okay if it had been our kid? One day, it could be our kid. Hopefully, the person with the answer to cure him will have the balls to do it," he quietly returned.
Lisa stared at him for a moment. Finally, she reached out to cover his hand with hers. Her brows furrowed in question. She pleaded, "Greg, I'm sorry. I am on your side. You know I'm on your side. I just want what's best for you – for us. But you can't keep doing this – you've had two warnings and now this probation. What's going on with you? It wasn't like this two years ago. What's changed?"
"I don't know," he answered quietly lacing his fingers with hers and meeting her eyes.
She moved towards him and cupped his cheeks, "I love you, but this can't keep happening."
He leaned forward touching his forehead to hers. His hands pulled her hands away from his face, "I love you, too. I wish I could promise that this was the last time . . . ."
"Don't lie. Don't make excuses... Let's go to bed," she urged pulling him under the covers with her.
May 1993
"Greg?" Lisa's voice rang out into the dark apartment as she angrily threw her bag to the floor. Making her way into the living room, she flicked on the light switch as she passed through the doorway.
Greg looked over his shoulder; one hand gripping a tumbler full of amber liquid and the other pressing against the window sill. Turning away to look back down at the street, he asked, "Can you turn the light off please?"
Lisa paused glaring at his back before flicking off the light and striding over to the couch. She queried brusquely, "Well?"
"Well what, Lisa?" he drawled taking a gulp from his glass.
Her eyes grew narrower as she stared hard at his back. Angry lines were set all over her face. Taking a deep breath, she exhaled loudly. She pushed out, "You lost your fucking job today! I was just wondering when the hell you were going to tell me!"
"Yeah. Actually, I hadn't really thought about when I was going to break the news," he replied his tone thoughtful as he set the tumbler down on the sill and leaned his head against the glass.
A series of short, nervous laughs came out of Lisa's mouth, and she lost her last bit of control. Getting up from the couch, she started to pace alongside the bookshelves that lined one wall of their living room. She yelled, "You're unbelievable. I knew that you were reckless and stubborn, but why couldn't you just get through this fellowship, Greg? Why the hell do you always have to be right?"
"Whatever, Lisa. You sound just like them. I don't have to be right, I am right. I knew what was killing that woman and I saved her life!" he yelled back. He stepped away from the window and came to stand by her.
"Don't pretend this is more than it is - you didn't do it for the patient! You only did it to prove you weren't wrong! You sure as hell didn't think about the consequences. You were on probation, Greg! What the hell- I can't deal with this," Lisa scoffed at him. She threw her hand out in resignation dismissing the argument and turned to leave the room.
"Way to be a supportive wife," he mocked under his breath.
Turning around quickly, she glowered at him. She demanded not believing she had heard him correctly, "What did you say?"
"Nothing. I didn't say a single thing," he lied easily holding her gaze.
"You fucking bastard! I have done everything to support you. I turned down the top residency programs in the country so that I could be here with you. So, you could do this damn fellowship, and we could start our lives together. But you are selfish, you only think about yourself. What you think is right!" she screamed at him. Her anger caused tears to burn at the back of her eyes.
His eyebrows lifted, and he stared at her coldly. "If I'm so damn selfish, why did I bother putting a ring on your finger? Because all you really have to offer is what's between your legs and I was getting that pretty regularly already. Though, it's not like I'm getting that all that often now which makes you pretty useless," he spat at her using her greatest insecurity against her. He knew that he didn't mean it. He would never mean it but he wanted to win this battle any way he could.
Her hand shot out before she could think. "Fuck you," she bit out through the hurt. Pushing him roughly to the side, she strode out of the room and locked herself in their bedroom.
Greg stood anchored to the spot his face burning from where she had slapped him. He never felt so much shame and guilt in his life. After several minutes, he heard her muffled sobs coming through the bedroom door. As he listened to her crying, he contemplated whether he should try and make amends or leave her alone. He grabbed his jacket and keys leaving the apartment.
When he left the apartment, he headed for the river and found an empty bench. He sat there for several hours watching the lights blink on and off across the water. His thumb idly spun his wedding band as he wondered why he was fucking up so badly.
The past year had been crazy. Lately, he felt overwhelmed by work, by the city, by Lisa. He could not seem to control his actions at work and his stubbornness to prove he was right was going to cost him – it really was not about thumbing his nose at authority, though that was his reputation, he could care less. He just had to know if he was right.
He knew, though, that he was going about it all wrong. He didn't know why he was acting like this. It was like he was sabotaging his life, and he was watching it happen, but he couldn't figure out how to stop it. A part of him felt like he did not deserve to figure it out – that this was just a failsafe way to deny him things that he never deserved in the first place: a decent career, someone who loved him, happiness.
A horn blast from a barge making its way down the river broke him out of his reverie, and he decided it was time to make his way home.
It was around two in the morning when Greg crawled into bed. Wrapping his arms around Lisa, he pulled her tightly against him. "I'm sorry," he whispered into her hair. "I didn't mean it, Lisa. Getting you to be my wife – to even have anything to do with me at all - is the best thing I've ever done. You are smart, funny, and unbelievable hot. You've always been there for me. I don't deserve you, but I can't imagine my life without you. I love you so much. I didn't mean to hurt you. I don't know... I don't know what's going on with me," he finished lying in silence as he listened to her breathe and hoping that she would say something.
When he finally felt her body shift against his, he tightened his grip on her, his body tensing as he anticipated her rejection. She sounded stuffy when she spoke, and he knew that she had cried for a long time. She managed to get out, "I love you, too, Greg. Let's just go to sleep, okay?" She requested.
His body relaxed. He moved his face into her neck lifting his leg over her, trapping her body beneath his. "I'm sorry," his voice cracked with his own tears threatening – the hurt in him running deep at the things he had said to her that evening and what he had put her through these past months.
