Title: Hesitance

Summary:

"Not everyone wants to put out their gifts in the morning. And also, not everyone goes for flowers! There are tons of other things mammals give out on Valentine's Day."

In which Nick and Judy don't yet have an established relationship. Post-movie, Nick and Judy both as officers.


Flowers. On her desk. In the middle of the ZPD office.

Until that point, she'd completely forgotten about the fact that it was Valentine's Day, of all days, and that was something she'd quite gladly pushed out of her mind. The card on the flower bouquet was at least plain and clear, to take out any ridiculous questioning, noting that the flowers were from Officer Trunkaby. Judy had gotten the elephant a birthday present a while back, so it seemed the colleague was just returning the favor, in a way. The flowers were certainly beautiful, too, though beginning to wilt. The wilting was so subtle, however, that Judy guessed she only noticed it because of her expertise in plants. She caught Francine's eye and mouthed a "thank you" before setting the flowers neatly to the side of her desk.

"Someone's popular."

The voice made Judy jump, having not heard Nick come up behind her. He'd gone to the break room to get coffees, and she turned to see him with a coffee in each paw.

"Slick Nick," Judy rolled her eyes, brushing her own paws down the length of her ears in an attempt to settle herself. "I'm not. They're from Francine." She took the coffee that Nick offered her, and stared at the cup for a moment. "It's Valentine's Day, so..." Something about just verbally addressing the holiday made her stomach twist up, but she took a sip of her drink in attempt to ignore it.

"I knew that," Nick slid into his seat beside hers and took a gulp of his coffee. "Still means you're popular, clearly. No one else has flowers on their desk."

"Yet," Judy corrected. "Not everyone wants to put out their gifts in the morning. And also, not everyone goes for flowers! There are tons of other things mammals give out on Valentine's Day."

"Does that mean you have someone special you're thinking of today?" A smug grin was already set on his face when she looked up at him. "Let me guess— one of the night shift officers?"

"No, Nick," Judy resisted the urge to roll her eyes again, as she handed Nick his share of the paperwork she'd picked up from the Chief. "Anyway, we need to get to work. Chief Bogo put us on desk duty, today." She turned to her own work, feeling particularly self-conscious, though she couldn't quite place why. Still, the bunny picked up a pen and started on her stack of papers.

It would be a long day.


Every once in a while, Nick would steal a glance at his partner.

It wasn't fair of him to feel disappointed at the fact that she'd just brushed the holiday off, especially since he hadn't exactly brought anything for her that day, but some part of him was unreasonably put off. The fact that he wasn't sure whether bringing a gift for her would be appropriate was, itself, frustrating enough to give him a headache. How would she even take it? They worked together daily, and it felt wrong to not get her some kind of appreciation gift, but the potential of things getting awkward was too huge.

He didn't want that.

Yet he found himself looking at Judy more frequently than usual, noticing details he formerly hadn't and questioning far more than necessary. Her eye's definitely sparkled in the light coming in from the windows, for example, and he wondered how he hadn't noticed how her nose twitched with excitement each time she finished up one page of paperwork. Was it weird to notice these things? Should he have noticed them earlier? What did it mean if noticing these things made him feel like he was going to lose his shit because it lingered on his mind when he was supposed to be continuing his paperwork?

Snap out of it..

Shaking his head, Nick returned to the form he was filling out, detailing updated information on a case one of the officer groups was working on. Something about a theft, and... hell, was Judy's scent always so strong? There was something a little different about it, perhaps, that Nick couldn't recognize. Something appealing. Which was ridiculous: this was his partner. His best friend. The one mammal he could always count on, and...

Someone he needed.


Expecting something from him was terrible of her. She wouldn't say she expected something, exactly. But each time Nick spoke up and only asked for some clarification on the forms he was working on, she found some sort of disappointment rise up. And that happened annoyingly more often than ever, on this particular day, so Judy found herself in a rather agitated state.

And that was uncalled for. But happened anyway. She couldn't help it. So she found her answers getting shorter and shorter when her partner did ask questions, and the confusion on his face was less than subtle.

"Ready to go home already, Carrots?" Nick poked her ear with the eraser end of a pencil, something he did sometimes when he'd make teasing comments. "That's not like you."

Sighing, Judy turned her head away in hopes that Nick wouldn't read whatever unpleasant expression was on it. "I am," she admitted, fumbling with the corner of the current paper she was filling out. Her words were quiet, but she added, "I'm ready to go."


He wanted to ask her to spend time with him that day.

It wasn't necessarily fair of him to ask, since that would probably put her in a weird position. Work was exhausting, and if she didn't want to, then he knew she'd feel guilty about saying no. She didn't need to spend time with him, by any means, and he didn't want to put pressure on her to decide whether or not spending more than their eight hour shift together was appealing. Her mood was clearly less than optimum, as well, and he guessed something was on her mind.

But with how readily she admitted she wanted to leave, wanted to go home in the middle of work, which she was crazy about, the realization occurred to him that he wouldn't be okay with not giving it a shot. The idea of just going their separate ways that day, not doing anything particularly special, sort of... felt more wrong than anything.

So he knew. He had to ask.


"Do you want to go to dinner tonight?"

Nick had asked the question right when they were about to clock out, and of course, Judy stuttered out an agreement of sorts. That earned her some extra teasing, but in the end, they agreed on meeting at a cozy restaurant in a neat corner of the city around 6 o'clock. Judy had spent the trip home wondering what in the world it even meant, other than just a friend date. Did it mean anything else? This was her best friend, no argument there, and she always enjoyed spending time with him, as he did with her.

So that meant it wasn't too significant, right? Even if they rarely went out to dinner in the evening way past work and the one day he asked just happened to be on Valentine's Day. That was just a coincidence. It had to be.

The fact that this was just a friend dinner thing meant that in no way did she need to be as nervous as she was thinking about the whole thing. She'd shared plenty of meals with the fox. And sure, she may have found her thoughts wandering toward the fox a little bit, each time that day when she heard something about Valentine gifts being passed out, but that was also unintended. An accident. She had no good reason to think of Nick, other than that he was her best friend, and best friends also gave out best friend appreciation gifts on Valentine's Day. And dinner counted as some kind of best friend appreciation Valentine thing, too. For sure!

That somehow didn't keep her heart from feeling extra heavy in her chest when she arrived at the restaurant, though. And it didn't keep her from doing a double take when Nick walked up dressed in what could only be described as a handsome suit. And that was totally wrong, so she erased the thought from her mind immediately and smiled at her friend. She certainly felt underdressed however, having only worn a warm sweater and slacks.

"Hey," she grinned, elbowing him in the side softly. "Looking to impress a vixen here, or something?"

He barked out a laugh. "'Course not, Carrots." Opening the door to the restaurant, Nick gestured in. "After you."

The restaurant was dimly lit and filled with various pairs of mammals, presumably celebrating the holiday. A few families were also scattered here and there, and this gave Judy some hope that they might be able to blend in well enough without being called out as a couple or anything like that. (The idea made her stomach do some sort of weird flip, but she ignored it.) Nick answered the deer hostess, who asked how many were in their party, and the two were lead by the doe to a booth in a corner.

Sliding into her seat and immediately beginning to look through the menu when presented with one, Judy found that the options were abundant (and plentiful enough to keep her distracted from the weird ache in her stomach). She smiled at that, and looked up at Nick.

He was already looking at her, and her heart did something strange when she noticed that.

"I'll be right back," Judy excused herself, slowly getting up. "Um. Bathroom."

She didn't wait for a response.


Once Judy returned to her seat, the meal went fairly smoothly. She did appear rather distracted, Nick noticed, and that worried him a bit. But they both found a dish they liked, the wait time wasn't too long, and they were able to chat about the usual topics, as always.

Yet it felt incomplete, and Nick had a feeling that he wasn't the only one who thought so. He may have been imagining it, but he did feel his read on other mammals, particularly Judy, was fairly accurate, so the disappointed vibes he was getting from his partner every so often were probably not fabricated by his mind. He didn't know exactly what may have caused the disappointment, of course, that would be impossible to know, but all the accidental eye contact? The fact that he could hear her heart racing a tad faster than usual, even for her? The hint of discomfort when they glossed over some sort of mention of their "friendship"?

She probably had the same sort of thing going on in her mind that he did.

"Any dessert for you two, tonight?" The antelope waitress who had been serving them once again stopped by after seeing the two were reaching the end of their meals.

"N—"

"We'll think about it, thank you," Nick shot Judy an apologetic glance as he cut the bunny off, aiming to bargain for more time. More time to talk to her, figure stuff out... something. And part of him had to admit that the pout on her face was rather endearing.

The antelope left, and Nick noticed Judy's nose was twitching faster than usual. Out of excitement or irritation, he couldn't tell. But given the situation, he assumed it was the latter.

"I think..." Nick began, stalling a bit by glancing around the room to avert his eyes. He took a deep breath and looked back at Judy. "There's something we should talk about."

The thing about Judy's stare, when she was looking Nick directly in the eyes, was that it was powerful . Her eyes sparkled, for sure, and there was definitely a mesmerizing quality to them that Nick hadn't noticed anywhere otherwise. So his breath caught a bit when he caught her staring at him along with a scent of some mixture of fear and... hope.

And yet he had no idea how to begin. "Hey, there might be something going on here" was way too vague, though it described his thoughts perfectly. "I know that we're partners, but you're gorgeous and attractive," was definitely out of the question. And ridiculous, no matter how true it was. He wouldn't be surprised if she just walked out on him after something like that.

"What is it?" Judy's voice interrupted his thought process, making him realize that he was taking way too long to say anything. Her voice sounded rather timid, though, uncharacteristically so, and he realized that basically saying "we need to talk" probably hadn't been the best approach. He needed to figure out what to say.

So he started with an apology.

"First off," he began, clearing his throat to try to reset himself. "I'm sorry that this is kind of... small. You know you deserve much more for Valentine's Day, and I certainly didn't deliver."

Judy raised an eyebrow at that. "You want to apologize?" She shook her head. "There's nothing to apologize for, Nick. It's not like you owe me, I mean, we're—"

"Friends," Nick easily finished her sentence. She nodded, confirming that he did so correctly. "I know, I don't owe you," He fidgeted with the napkin in his lap for a moment. Pause. Deep breath. Looking back up at her, he continued. "But I think… I need to do more for you."

Just as Judy opened her mouth to presumably reply, the antelope returned with a dessert menu for the pair. "I'll come back in a few moments if you'd like some time to decide."

Quickly glimpsing over the short menu, his mind still occupied with his and Judy's conversation, Nick found the first dessert that stood out to him. "Actually, can we get the carrot pudding?" He handed the menu back to the antelope, who nodded and walked back off to the next table she was helping.

Judy cleared her throat, then, bringing Nick's attention back to her (though it would have immediately returned to the bunny either way). "So, you think you need to do more?" Judy echoed his words.

She paused, and Nick held off on saying anything, giving her time to process. It made him nervous, he had to at least admit to himself, but he couldn't rush her, either. Though it was impossible not to wonder what she was making of the whole thing. His mind flipped through a number of possibilities before she finally spoke again.

"Why?"

The question threw him off. He knew why, but he didn't even think he wanted it to be the truth. It was too complicated, too different from everything before. Yet it was inevitable, wasn't it? "I really—"

"One carrot pudding," the waitress returned, cutting into the conversation momentarily. The antelope seemed oblivious to any stress in the situation. "Please enjoy."

"Thank you," Nick tried not to let his irritation show through, but the interruption had already forced him to lose track of the words he'd intended to say. Nudging the dessert toward Judy instead, the fox went along with the distraction. "Try it, Carrots."

She hesitated, her gaze lingering on Nick's face for a moment longer than it might normally, but she tried a bite of the pudding, and her face lit up. Judy, however, wasn't one to let the conversation get sidetracked. Before taking another bite, she prodded. "Tell me, though. What makes you think you need to do more for me?"

Nick once again took a deep breath. This wouldn't be easy, but it needed to be done, right? "I don't want any of this to put you off. Every time I see you, it's..." He couldn't figure out the right words, and looked away a moment, as if that would reduce any of the tension in his gut. It didn't. Nick breathed out slowly. "Point is, I … we've spent a lot of time together." He cleared his throat, watching her take slowly scrape a bit more of the carrot pudding into her spoon, as if she thought moving too fast would stop him from talking. This brought a hint of a smile to his face. "And it's not just our time together, it's also our conversations, and really everything else." Another deep breath. "What I'm trying to say is, you mean a lot to me. A lot . And... You know that, right?"

It felt like a million seconds passed before Judy responded. He saw her breath in deeply, stare down at the remainder of the pudding for a moment. "I... think so," she spoke softly, still looking down at the plate. A handful of extra seconds passed before she looked up and spoke again. "What does it feel like, then?" She hesitated before continuing, but being Judy Hopps, she wasn't about to stop there. "When you see me? Or when we spend time together?"

That kind of question wasn't one he'd been prepared for at all. He'd spent so much time avoiding revealing too much about how he felt (or any , to mammals other than Judy). It was hard to remind himself to be honest. To stop hiding. But when he found himself again trapped in Judy's gaze, unable to look away, no longer even wanting to hide, he realized he could do it.

"I feel safe," he admitted, and his words came out more quietly than anything he remembered saying before. Gentle. "Safe and happy ." Another steady breath. "And at home."

She didn't reply right away. Nick couldn't look away, not this time, and he noticed a gleam in her eyes that wasn't quite there before. "Well, Nick," her words shook at first, but she settled them quickly. "You know I feel the same, right?"

Relief flooded from Nick's chest in a breath. He hadn't truly expected any other answer, but hearing it aloud was perfect. "Do I know that?" He leaned into the table a bit, a small grin tugged at the corners of his lips, and he could tell Judy was fighting off one of her own. "Yes. Yes, I do."


Found out it was AngloFalcon's birthday on Friday, so I asked him if there was any WildeHopps he wanted to see written. So I wrote this this with Valentine's Day in mind— happy birthday! (He also has fanfiction up, like "In and Out of Love" (which is WildeHopps), so go take a look!)

Huge thank you to those other things for helping me out with this! Check out her fic "Boys Like You," if you haven't yet. Or any of her other fics. Seriously.