16/01/2011 15:50:00
Chapter 4
Hermione looked around the small, one-bedroom flat she had found with Ginny a few days earlier. It had been two weeks since 'that night,' and after forcing herself to take each day at a time, here she was, standing in a flat that did not feel like home, with boxes stacked in every corner.
She felt her phone vibrate and pulled it out. It was a message from Harry.
6:45 PM: Everything will be alright, Hermione. We'll stop by later on tonight. Has the furniture arrived yet? Keep in touch. H&G
After spending two weeks in the guest bedroom of Harry and Ginny's townhouse, though Hermione could still feel their care and support, she could also acknowledge their exhaustion from babysitting her every evening. She smiled inwardly at their efforts.
6:48 PM: It's okay. And you don't need to come check up on me tonight, I'm a big girl. The furniture hasn't arrived yet, but it should be here by 8. I'll talk to you guys in the morning. –Mione
Harry and Ginny had been wonderful to her. She could admit that. But in the pit of her stomach, Hermione began contemplating the enormous strain this breakup would have on her relationship with the couple. First off, Ron was Ginny's brother. Second, Harry and Ron were best friends. Though her friendships were equally strong, there was something ominous about how everything would play out.
Hermione thought about the situation for weeks, meticulously organizing the rest of her life without Ron, and the chance that her closest friends would distance themselves in order to stay out of loyalty battles. They would be there, but there was the chance that she could no longer confide in them.
But would that happen? Would they distance themselves from her? Hermione talked herself in circles, questioning their characters for the first time since they became friends. No one had done anything wrong, in a general aspect, but Hermione could not estimate the aftermath of such a fracture in their core group.
More than anything, however, Hermione could not acknowledge nor suppress her loneliness. She and Ron had been an entity in themselves, a couple opposite Harry and Ginny, a duo that comprised their lives with each other.
Where was she now? Hermione, the witch prized for her intelligence, cleverness, courage and ambition, was suddenly questioning her own character. Who was she without Ron and Harry? Yes, she was an astonishingly successful, intelligent witch that could master any academic feat placed in her way. But beyond her accomplishments—who was she without them? They were her life, and now she had none.
Hermione began to see the reverberations of the split by the end of the season. The summer was beginning, and with a three month holiday between the end of her muggle calendar and the start of her work at St. Mungo's, she began searching for a way to fill her free time.
Her apartment had finally come together, after two months of decorating and redecorating, dwelling on small details and wasting hours of time focusing on her new project. In a way, her apartment had to symbolize her new life, one without what had always been her other half.
Ginny had told her that her independence and freedom should feel liberating and invigorating. That under the pain, there was this little strip of light. It took Hermione some time to accept the idea.
Finally, once London cleared up and the gardens and parks were flowing with greenery, Hermione felt her spirit lift, feeling ready, and maybe even excited, to begin anew.
She had stayed close with Ginny and Harry for the most part, but when they felt she was getting on her feet, they got on with their lives and acted normal. They were neutral in the breakup, and didn't want to interfere.
As it was, though, by the time Hermione ended her muggle schooling term, she was seeing the pair infrequently, and their communication had become lazy and only polite. They would talk about school, Ginny's new ventures, or the progress of Harry's many charities. Their personal lives were no longer involved with each others, and conversation never ventured in that direction.
Hermione had woken up one morning to see Harry and Ron posing for a picture at some event at Beauxbatons, with an attached article on the front page of the Daily Prophet. They were vacationing in the area and attended together, while 'Ginerva Weasley remained in London to attend the annual Ministry Spring Ball (picture inset)'.
It had been the first true sign that their lives were growing apart. She always knew what was going on, but here she was, oblivious to the fact that they were in France together. Even more surprising, Ginny hadn't said a word, nor invited her out as she usually would, given Harry's absence.
After a week of holiday, no word from her friends, and nothing ot occupy her time, Hermione allowed her conscience to finally admit the truth: she had no life. She had a C.V. that could grant her any job, in the muggle world or the wizarding world, but she had no one to congratulate her or talk to her about it.
She picked up her phone and called Ginny. As distanced as she felt, maybe the feisty redhead would be herself with her once maid of honor.
"Hello?" Ginny's voice sounded far away and uninterested with the call. Hermione could hear voices and cheering in the background.
"Ginny? It's Hermione. Where are you? It's so loud."
"Hermione? Hi! How are you?" Hermione heard Ginny whisper 'It's 'mione. I'll be off soon.'
"I'm good! I've been on holiday for about a week now, I was getting bored. What are you up to? We haven't seen each other in ages. Harry especially! It seems like he's always out."
"Oh that's great, Hermione. I'm with him right now actually! We're on tour."
"Tour?"
"For the Stealth Stags. We have 15 matches in 10 different countries, and only a month and a half for them, and whoever comes out with the best score goes on to the world cup. It's all very exciting."
"Oh! Well, that sounds like fun." Hermione feigned excitement. Ron was with them then. The three of them were going to be together for most of the summer.
"I'm sorry Hermione. I would've told you, but Harry didn't want to hurt your feelings since were going to be with Ron a lot…"
"No, no it's okay. I might take a trip somewhere. I'll let you know or something, okay? Have fun!"
Hermione hung up. She couldn't bear it. The laughter, the cheering, this stupid tour. She should have been there. They should've all been together, having a laugh, drinking pitchers of iced mead while she watched her boyfriend lead the team to victory.
But she wasn't. She would never be there.
Hermione grabbed a silver beaded clutch from her wardrobe. She had kept the purse since their adventures before The Fall. She went through her flat and packed everything. Clothing for every climate, belongings she would miss after a few weeks. She left money on the counter for two month's rent with a letter for her landlord stating that if she should need to send in more rent money, she would. Lastly she wrote a brief letter to Harry and Ginny, stating that she was leaving and traveling for some time and would write soon. She didn't tell them where she was going, because in truth, she had no idea.
The only thing that stuck in Hermione Granger's mind was the fact that she had enough saved up to take care of herself, and that she needed to get out lest her loneliness consume every working part of her body.
