Chapter 4: A Moment of Peace
Makoto's eyes lowered. Her hands fiddling with each other. She was shaking, her breath barely even coming out of her mouth. Fear had its hand inside of her, controlling her to the fullest. Her teary eyes were darting around, looking and eyeing anything and everything just for a release. Something to take her away from this pain. She already felt it twice. She was nearly at the point of breaking down again...like when she was a kid. Memories she never wanted to encounter again.
No matter how much she tried and forced herself to delete these feelings of utter despair and fear...she just couldn't. Everything kept reminding her. Every single thing. The blinding lights of the room, the deafening silence that was engulfing her, that was occasionally broken. Ann's scared and broken expression, Futaba's hair covering her terrified face. The screams and groans of Yusuke, Ryuji, Mona, and most importantly, to her, Akira in the operation room. However, the thing that kept ripping her from the present and throwing her and drowning her in the blood-ridden memories of the past...was Akira's blood on her hands. It just didn't—no it wouldn't stop. He just kept bleeding...and bleeding. To the point, it got to Makoto's clothing and stained her hands permanently. She couldn't wash it off, with Takemi's only sink in the room. She couldn't bare with going inside there, and even if she wanted to...Takemi wouldn't allow her.
Akira's crimson blood kept...forcing itself inside her brain. Trickling into every single facet, and coating her vision in a deep sea of just pure red.
"Stop. Stop. Please just stop. Please...why won't it just STOP?! Why is it dripping?! Why doesn't it just stop...th-this is my fault...Akira—I...I'm—I—"
"M-Makoto." Makoto's blurry eyes shot to Ann. Her voice shaking with anxiety and fear. Like always...it was still strong. Her voice was always filled with strength...something Makoto lacked. "I-It's not your fault. I-I know what you're feeling. Trust me. But...you can't internalize that. It doesn't-It never works out. I-If you need to, talk to me...please..." Ann wiped a tear from her eyes and slid to Futaba..and comforted her. Hugging her.
Makoto took a swallow and looked away. She could barely even look at Futaba."Her first experience in the Metaverse...ending like this. All because of me. All...because of me.." Tears started to bulge up in her eyes, her figure collapsing as she covered her eyes and crying.
"Igor! No!" Akira shot to the bars, his eyes wide. "What does this all fucking mean?! The Reaper fucked us all and implied we won't die but I've been in the Velvet Room for hours! An-and he implied that we might beat the Lord guy? And we've been going around in circles and you've barely fucking talked to me!"
Igor sighed.
He detached himself from his desk and paced toward the jail cell. His Twin Wardens moving away to give their master his much-required space. Igor unlocked the cell and opened the cell. Much to Akira's surprise, he...didn't step in like last time.
"W-wait Igor I can—"
"Yes, Trickster."
Shit...Akira felt like a child to even admit it in his mind but...he was so excited. To step into the Velvet Room? Without being contained in a cell? The proposition excited him to no end! At least he was having some happiness from this shitty day.
Stepping outside of the Velvet Cell...the Velvet Room was filled in a circle with multiple cells basked in that blue and velvet hue that Akira loved so much. There seemed to be this corridor that led to more cells, and while Akira wanted to investigate...Igor pointed to a chair in front of his desk, to which he sat down.
"Okay, Trickster. Speak."
Akira took a breath, and opened his mouth, "Why did the Reaper come after us?"
"Naturally, because you were on the floor for over two minutes. Now as to his connection to ML...I'm not sure. But I'm guessing that entire battle was to get a sense of what you guys can do. Which is why he kept coming after you. What he said to you however...that's ominous. Maybe you can defeat that bastard but...I wouldn't let that get to your head Kurusu."
"Shit." Akira breathed out, he looked back at Igor, "Okay. You explained what ML is...but you never explained where he is? Do we know?"
"He's...unknown. And honestly, I don't want to know. That might make us a target due to trying to find him. He's always watching you Akira, this is your only safe haven from him since I've reinforced this place." Igor took a breath in and clasped his hands together. He stared at Akira with an intense glare, "There's no way he can get in anymore. So be careful as to what you say in the material world Akira. Don't let him know you know more than you let on. Something like how we're gonna find him, or just something...important."
"Got it. Now...I wanted to ask...I can't nut as of now? Like a zero percent chance of me nutting?"
Igor snorted while he struggled to get his words out as he choked on his laughter, "No, no you ridiculously horny bastard. You can't nut in any way shape or for—"
"Can't I nut in here? You said he can't track or trace us anymo—"
"I said he can't actively look at us or hear us...but the curse he planted on you and your guys...that's passive and is always on you. It'll always affect you."
Akira winched as he heard the last couple of words. It...really was true. There was no denying it. Akira "RenRen" Kurusu...couldn't beat his poor little meat anymore...He started to let his hands ruffle and glide through his dark messy hair. This...this wasn't it for Akira. A sigh came from his mouth, taking off his glasses and cleaning them.
"Look Trickster. Uh..you can do something instead you know...?"
"I have been...jerking off for a long time Igor. I—" Akira cut himself off and looked down for a minute. Truly attempting to let the news dive deep within his mental state. "—I...let's just move on."
"What else do you have to ask?"
"Two things. One...am I going to be fine in the material world...? Is the rest of my team going to be fine...?"
An expression of pure pity painted itself onto Igor's face. He breathed out some air as his eyes dropped down to his desk. Looking up, Igor pushed himself off his desk and placed himself onto his desk, crossing his leg over his other one.
"Look, Akira...you'll be fine. You and your team have encountered and been through so much. You guys have never given up before...and I don't expect you to give up now. But you'll be banged up for a while...and I don't know how that 'One-Shot Kill' bullet is going to be on your body. Since it's a miracle you survived it. It has that name for a reason...I hope it doesn't have some type of negative effects."
Akira looked a bit absentminded, but Igor's speech made him feel better. Shaking his head up and down, he started to stand up. "I..uh..wanna know...am I just gonna have to stay here until my body heals or...?"
Igor looked at him, considering the question. "The way things are...time is going to be accelerating faster here than in the human world..so you should know soon Akira. If...if you don't know soon then..." Igor stopped himself from answering the question.
Akira eyed him, he knew what he was getting at, and he understood Igor's hesitance. Akira walked back into his cell. Gripping the bars and closing them behind him. Turning around he stared at Igor, "Well...the only thing we can do is wait."
Igor chuckled, and so did his wardens. "Well said, Trickster. Well said. So let us wait."
Akira nodded his head and laid on his bed, attempting to relax. Which was something he knew wouldn't happen?
Makoto's eyes were sore with hours of crying.
She was so close.
Somehow she kept holding herself off. She didn't know how. Yet she kept herself from the brink. While Takemi told them to go home, to which Ann took Futaba home and was staying with to make sure she was alright...Makoto hadn't moved a step. She was adamant in staying. To make sure that all her friends were going to be okay...and to even lessen the guilt.
For all that she was feeling, Makoto fell asleep in the seating area. Something she soon came to regret.
Her mind was slathered with memories. Ones from today, to ones from a decade ago. They threw themselves everywhere in her mind, gluing and plastering themselves in every single crevasse. Vivid memories making Makoto's mind race with anxiety and anger. Although sadness took control quickly.
"Makoto." The young Niijima daughter shot up, her hands latching to her face to make sure she was all there. Sweat dribbling out of every pore in her face. She pulled her hand away to reveal sweat drenching it. Makoto's eyes shot to her left, latching onto Takemi's figure.
Takemi's face was drowned in defeat. The light casting a shadow over her face. Her eyes had bags under them, even more than usual. Her hands were covered with little spots of blood on it. The mere sight of the blood, even if it wasn't Akira's, made Makoto sick to her stomach. Her hand instinctively shot to her mouth to cover it from nearly puking, but she caught herself. Utterly disgusting at...Akira's dried blood stuck in her fingernails and fingerprints. She tried washing it off after forcing herself through the mental block she was giving herself to not go into Takemi's back room, but it just...wouldn't...no couldn't come out..the mere sight just made her puke rise even higher, with Makoto struggling to her fullest to maintain her broken composure and not puke in the middle of Takemi's office.
The gothic loving and themed doctor had a little bitter sigh come from her mouth, her form coming back into the familiar shape that Makoto had grown to know her for.
"They...they're going to be fine. I...don't know what you guys did to have bullet wounds...but they'll be fine. They should wake soon. Aka...probably in the afternoon or night." Takemi eyed her watch, seeing it was a little after 12. "So it's the 6th currently. Makoto I know what you said...but you don't have to be here."
"I...know Takemi. And I appreciate the concern you're showcasing, but I need to stay."
"It wasn't really a concern, as if I were to have some customers tonight I didn't wanna have them try to avoid a Student Council President sleeping in my waiting area with blood stains on her hands. But...if you want to stay for them, or should I say him..?"
Makoto's face started to blush a passionate shade of red, but before she could even say anything in her defense, Takemi cut her off. "But anyway...it'll be fine. However...instead of risking multiple neck knots sleeping on these chairs...just come into the back. I do have another bed, don't ask why I have an upwards of four medical beds for a damn clinic.."
Makoto took a minute, thinking about possibly resending the offer, but Takemi didn't give her enough time as she gripped the young girl's wrist and pulled her with her as she paced into the back room. "T-Takemi you don't have to do this! Please stop-" Makoto's speech immediately stopped, her eyes harshly locking onto Akira's broken figure. "Akira..." All the poor woman could feel was guilt and sorrow, her breaths coming out in shaky portions, a repeat of earlier started to play out through her mind, ...Vivid and destructive of memories of Akira's mangled and broken body with bullets riddling his torso. It...broke her soul so much. Making her nearly break down into ugly and loud cries, but Takemi slowly paces to behind her, placing her hand on her shoulders. A deep sign slowly ripping itself from her mouth. Makoto's hands latched onto her face, wiping away the tears she had on the verge of flowing from her eyes. "..Makoto..I..really do understand how you're feeling. I'm pretty sure that most of the people you're around, really do understand where you're coming from. Especially Akira. I don't think if he was in your shoes...he'd be filled with sorrow. I'd think he'd take that guilt and create something good from it."
Makoto slightly chuckled, realizing that Tae didn't know about the good that Akira has done with his sorrow. "I guess that people know Akira too well...that quality just transitions to everyone huh..."
"Okay, Ms. Niijima I'm gonna need for you to sit right here on this bed. I don't need you to collapse on me now."
Makoto nodded, placing a hand on the bed to smooth out the wrinkles, taking an attempt to rest her nerves on the bed and get comfortable. Tae started strode over to the curtains around the boys, pulling them to cover their broken forms, but Makoto shot a hand out, gripping Tae's wrist. Tae shot her head back, looking at Makoto's hand and herself with eyes filled with disgust, disapproval, and confusion. Makoto, taking the glare in, released her tightened grip. "T-Tae..please don—"
"Don't what? Close the curtain? So you can guilt trip and make yourself wallow in a deep...crushing...and controlling pool of depression and sorrow? So you can actively make yourself worse with what should've been, and what might've been?"
Makoto dropped one of her hands from her face, her face locked to the ground while taking in Tae's words.
"Look Makoto. I'm telling you from personal experience, the things you keep showing...that's just gonna lead to a regressed version of you. Especially from what Akira told me about you from the past."
The young Niijima's ears started to perk up from hearing that last part, causing her to raise her head up, "Wait...Akira's talked about me...?"
"..Really kid? Course he's talked about you. With the way he's described you, I'd think the kid was in love or something. But besides that...he's made it seem like you've changed in a numerous amount of ways since your first encounter with him back at Shujin in April. So, for the sake of him when he wakes up...don't regress. Be your usual, strange self for his sake along with the others. I think they'd need something reminiscent of normalcy to make them get back to normal. Maybe." Tae strode to Makoto, patting her on the head. "Don't let those last couple of words get to you like that...I'm just a doctor, a shitty one at that, not a therapist. Anyway...get some sleep alright?" Pacing back, Takemi closed the noisily screeching curtains. Letting Makoto take one final glance at Akira and the others' resting, and frankly, peaceful faces.
Which, for Makoto, was something that gave her some solace.
"5:48..." The blinding light of Tae's phone squished her eyes up into lines, making her line of sight barely visible.
"Shit...well...this isn't really anything new to be awake during this time. I wonder what I'll go and eat right now.."
Eyeing the curtain, a little rare smile bore itself onto Tae's face.
"That kid is one crazy bastard...always forcing himself into people's lives...like a glitch in the system to make people better off. I'm hella surprised he kept that same level of determination even when I did those...thorough exams.."
Tae started to rub her fist into her forehead, her face slightly blushing."...No...that damned kid has to like that...with all that shit I do to him in here, and his constant flirting...heh. I should probably stop before I mess about and he somehow busts a nut on himself." A sly chuckle slid from her mouth as she picked herself up from her seat, attempting to silently pace towards the curtain and moving it so quietly, revealing the boys recovering bodies to her darkness cloaked vision. However, laying her head on the side of the examination beds was Makoto, purely sleeping with enjoyment. Honestly, it was lightly amusing to Tae, finally seeing that girl having an expression on her face that wasn't filled with regret, sorrow, fear or god knows what else other emotion. "Akira did a good job with picking a girl such as herself to include in his little group...I hope you continue on with helping Akira with...his unusual escapades."
Before she could continue anymore, a zing reverberated through the entire exam room and Tae's ears, shaking Makoto to wake and utterly startling Tae. but quickly, she calmed down as Makoto sturred to wake and grabbed her phone. Her muffled and groggy vision quickly starting to become banished once Makoto read the caller ID.
"Sae Niijima."
"S-Sis? What are you doing calling me this early in the morning..?"
"Well…from the sound of that, it almost seems like you don't want to talk to your sister…In all honesty, I didn't even think you were gonna answer the phone…Since it is 5:51 in the morning. The entire reason why I even called you Makoto…was because I'm home currently, and I don't seem to see my little sister. Now my question is….what could my little Niijima sister doing away from home during the summer vacation…? I hope you aren't—"
"I'm fine sis…I just…had some summer council duties to attend to. I'm actually just waking up from falling asleep in the office by accident.." Makoto's breaths started to get shallower, and she bit her lip. She needed Sae to believe this, just this once. She knew that no matter what, she wouldn't be able to explain all this, nor would she be able to even handle it.
"Sis? Did you hear me?" Makoto heard a little gulp in the background, with it finally making sense to the smaller Niijima.
"Yeah, Makoto. I'm fine. You…uh..you do your thing. After all, a determined and hard worker is desired in the workforce. Keep it up, sis. Just tell me when you're coming home alright?"
"…Y-Yeah….I hear you, sis." Before Makoto's 'sis' could even be fully spoken, the dial tone blared itself into Makoto's eardrum, her eyes weighing a thousand tons as she glanced down at the floor, before quickly picking herself back up once Tae's voice started to echo.
"…Alcoholism I presume…?" Makoto's eyes shot to Tae, wrapping themselves around her figure. Her mouth started to open, at first in surprise, but it was soon replaced with fangs making a snarl in her face. Reading Makoto's face, she raised up one finger, "Look, I uh…get that. I also know what it's like to be on both sides of that emotional spectrum…But uh…all I can say Makoto-san? Listen to what your heart desires."
Makoto didn't really understand why Tae was being so nice to her now…it was so polarizing and appalling. Maybe she was just trying to comfort Makoto, or even just to give some advice that she needed since it seemed that Takemi saw a lot of her younger self within Makoto. Neither one of the girls could really narrow down a concrete answer that would make sense within their characters or would even satisfy them. However, before they could even move on, a horrible and violent cough exploded from the area of the boys, making the duo shoot their eyes immediately to their exam beds. Akira was reflexively gripping his chest in pain while his closed eyes narrowed, his sweat dribbling down his face as it collided and mixed with the fresh blood from his horrible cough. Makoto shot up from her chair, sending it flying back into Takemi's desk as the goth doctor herself zoomed to Akira's bedside.
"A-Akira?! Are you okay?! Can you hear anything? Do you know where you are…?!" Tae's questions weren't getting any type of response, it was as if she was speaking completely to a brick wall…her hands latched to his face, inspecting it as his face kept twitching and winching. His breath just kept…getting worse and worse. Worry started to bathe itself and take shelter on Takemi's face. She looked back at Makoto, the girl's face pained with sadness and worry, wrenching her head back to Akira's face, she lowered it down to his ears and whispered one simple thing. "Come on Kurusu….You're better than this. Don't leave pretty Ms. Niijima all sad and alone….she needs and wants you kid. After everything you've told me, you're gonna die right where the time is nigh? Come on kid! WAKE UP!" She pulled her head back, her eyes looking at Akia's jerking eyelids with a sorrow-filled hope.
Seconds passed. Those seconds turned into minutes. Nothing had changed…in fact…Akira had stopped moving completely. Akia's heart rate was just….gone….much to the utter heartbreak to Makoto and Tae, as the latter turned her head back towards Makoto…fearing and dreading her reaction.
Seeing her face broke Tae.
Tae had been used to, naturally of course when considering the grim nature of her profession, seeing that face, a face of pure disgusted with themselves and being racked with some type of fear along with an intense sadness. "It's apart of my job, after all, all…and it was an emotion that I myself felt when…Miwa—" Tae gripped her face, shaking her head to just…force the memories away…but there was something about Makoto's face…it just broke every single aspect of Tae, and she couldn't tell why.
Makoto's body started to convulse in disgust as it seemed she was about to throw up or cry horribly, but Tae quickly shot from her seat and tightly grasped the young girl.
The effort was useless. The duo started to both stream tears from their eyes, the two just holding one each for just some type of comfort, with Makoto collapsing into Takemi's arms when the death doctor herself could barely even hold herself up…
Tae placed her hand onto Makoto's head, petting her as she attempted to talk while choking on her tears, "M-Makoto…I-Its's gon-gonna be alright…" Tae's attempt fell on death ears as the younger girl gripped Tae's lab coat, even more, borrowing her face into it in an attempt to mask her ugly and vulnerable groans and scream of disparity…
A cough echoed through the room again. A little voice started to whisper, making the girls move quickly beside Akira's bed, with Makoto gripping his face as her tears dropped onto his face. "Akira…?"
A dozen seconds passed and she didn't a reply, but the young leader of the Phantom Thieves' eyes started to slowly open. With his first sight being Tae looking over him with a look of triumphant, and with Makoto gripping his face while looking straight into his eyes with her face riddled with tears and a look of relief. Then, the young Kurusu uttered his first words… "Makoto….?"
She gave him a tight and loving hug, much to his confusion. However, Akira didn't mind it…it seemed like the last couple of hours were really stressful for her, so he placed his hand on her head as he started to whisper in her ear, "Makoto…I'm sorry for making you worry like this…"
A single thought kept looming in the boy's head…about everything that Igor had discussed with him. Once the rest of the boys started to wake up, Akira needed to talk to them…but for now….he needed to rest and to simply enjoy this. This little moment of peace.
A/N: Yikes, sorry for being a week late, High School has been hella stressful on my Freshmen ass, I'll get chapter 5 out by tomorrow or Monday. Sorry for this being officially the shortest chapter, I just wanted to do this story beat only in this chapter, I promise that chapter 5 will be probably the longest chapter in the fic so far, so have something to be on the lookout for! Also, the comedy is going to come back, I just wanted to change up the mood for these last two chapters! I don't even think I could handle nor even enjoy constantly moody and grim things all the time lmao. Anyway, I hope you guys enjoyed this!
