Author's note: Hello everyone! It took me awhile to update, but this chapter is long so I hope that makes up for the delay. Oh, and I'd like to thank everyone that's reviewed and messaged me! It means a lot.
There are a few things I want to say about this chapter. 1. I'm from New York, I love New York, so don't get offended when I write something about it later. 2. I'm having difficulty figuring out where to go with Nina's mental condition. I want it to be realistic, but this is a Lily/Nina story, plain and simple. I'm not delving into it too much right now, but I'm not dropping the subject either. 3. Let's talk about Veronica. Yes, she's a bitch, and everyone's writing her that way. I wasn't writing her like that for no reason, though. I truly believe that Veronica would be horrible when Nina came back. She was a nasty bitch to begin with, then she had a problem with Nina, and then she had to watch Nina nail the part and then Lily take over, when she thought it should have been hers to begin with. Then she had 2 months to stew in it, and when she finally sees Nina, Thomas is practically molesting her, and most likely giving Nina back the part because of sex. I think Veronica would hate her. 4. I know that they weight like 90 lbs, so 5 drinks would put them in the hospital. I'm ignoring that for the sake of the story.
OK, enjoy!
...
It's been four days since my first time back at the studio. I've gone back only two of those days, trying not to work myself too hard. The last time I went in, Thomas actually practiced with me. Despite whatever has taken place between us, I respect Thomas as a director and choreographer. I know he's talented, brilliant actually. I also know that he sees something special in me, and he's made it clear to me that he wants that something to be what drives me when I dance. He says that that is where my passion lies, and I need to access it.
I understand passion, even if he doesn't think so. I've always had intense feelings, regardless of my attempts to restrain them. Unfortunately, they manifested themselves in strange ways, such as my obsessive compulsions. Since I woke from my coma, though, they've been breaking through like crazy, and in ways that I'm not used to. I can cry at the drop of a hat, and rage can overtake me quite easily. Just looking at my mother sometimes makes me so angry that I have to go for a long walk to calm down. I need to move out, but I know that realistically, that's not an option for me right now.
The strongest feeling I've had recently, though, is lust. I feel it constantly, as if I'm perpetually turned on without meaning to be. Sometimes I look at someone even mildly attractive, and my thoughts automatically turn to myself and that person, sweaty and tangled in bed sheets. I'm good at ignoring it most of the time, but my dreams are out of my control. I'm always having sex with a faceless, amazing lover. If it's not a sex dream, though, it's a dream about some kind of pain being inflicted on me. My dreams are so vivid that it scares me. Could they be hallucinations? I don't think they are. Sometimes I know that I'm dreaming, and Dr. Bell told me that a person experiencing hallucinations has no idea that it's happening.
Actually, Dr. Bell has told me a few interesting things lately. I haven't been experiencing all of the... issues that I was having leading up to Swan Lake. While my dreams can be scary and vivid, in reality I seem to know what's actually happening. If I am hallucinating, it's not about anything noticeable. I don't think I am though.
I've been improving, and I've only recently revealed to Dr. Bell that I'm not taking my medication. She's been attributing my progress to that, so she was shocked, to say the least. Now that I don't have a real diagnosis, I'm being told that I experienced a "Brief Psychotic Disorder." Apparently I don't qualify for Schizophrenia because my symptoms haven't lasted for more than six months. Dr. Bell has been pushing this theory even more since I explained to her that I've always had neurotic tendencies, but the hallucinations only started recently. The one thing she's maintained this whole time, though, is that my episode was triggered by outside stressors. We've been focusing a bit more of coping skills now, and I'll probably start seeing a therapist soon.
The only mental issues I really have right now are the memories of what I believed happened. I remember how scared I was, and how it felt to be so... deranged? Sick? Psycho? Whatever it was, feeling it isn't pleasant. Well, I only feel it if I'm asleep, and when I'm awake I just remember it. It can be... disorienting. Maybe it's the dreams that are making my emotions so hard to keep hold of when I'm awake.
This is all so confusing. It makes my head hurt.
I try my best to ignore any memories from before, but in doing so that means that I have to assume that none of it was real. If none of it was real, then I have to let go of some of the grudges that I hold, due to those memories.
I'm talking about Lily, of course. When am I ever not talking about Lily? I'm just as fixated on her as I've always been, but now it's different. Now I know that she's not what I thought she was, which makes her even more interesting to me. Why her? Why was she the target? So she's a free spirit, relaxed, and sexy. Everyone in the world is all of those things compared to me.
And yet, for some reason I feel drawn to her. I haven't seen her since that day at the studio, but she hasn't left my thoughts. All I can do is pick apart my relationship with her.
Why does she like me so much?
Do I crave time with her or dread it?
Why am I obsessed with her?
What do we have in common?
How are we different?
Why am I obsessed with her?
I know the answer to the most important question though.
Do I have any right to be upset with her?
No. I don't. And that's why I'm sitting in a trendy restaurant in the Village, waiting for her to arrive. She's extremely late, and I left my phone at home, so I can't even call her.
The decor of the restaurant is quite nice. The large, ornate room is decorated in golds, reds, and other rich, warm colors. It had a distinctly vintage style. I'd guess maybe the 1920's. Our table it a small, rounded booth. It's cozy, which I love.
Just when I'm starting to think that I'm getting stood up, I see Lily. She nearly sprints to the table.
"Hey! Sorry I'm late," she says, out of breath. She pulls her ear phones out. "My fucking roommate cornered me when I was walking out the door, and then I couldn't get a cab, and then we got stuck in traffic. I tried calling you but you didn't pick up.
She's she sits down, still panting. "I need to catch my breath, I'm dying here. Can I try that?" she asks as she reaches for my drink. I sit silently as she takes a drink, and then her face becomes amused. "Seriously?"
"What?" What did I do?
"It's virgin," she states, as if that's the obvious answer.
"Well yeah, I really shouldn't drink. I don't handle it well, like you do. Remember last time?" I don't think she even knows the half of it.
She rolls her eyes. "Yeah, last time you were also rollin on ecstasy. There's a big difference. All you have to do is pace yourself."
"I know, but..." I trail off. I don't have much of a defense.
"Oh, Nina," she sighs. "I thought we'd already been through all of this."
I don't comment, and she sighs again. "Fine, whatever. That's your choice. I, on the other hand, plan on getting just a little bit hammered." She looks over the menu, scratching her chin. "Hmm... I wonder what a Leg Spreader is? Sounds fun," she smiles.
I stay silent, not sure what to say to that. Whenever I'm unsure of what to say, I find that staying silent is the best thing to do.
Lily finally looks up from the menu. Her eyes seem playful. "Maybe I'll try that later. I'm thinking Sex on the Beach. Who doesn't love sex, right?" She's looking at me, smiling in a way that makes me think she's trying to push my buttons.
I can play back. "...Or beaches?" Well, I tried.
Lily seems to think it's funny, throwing her head back when she laughs. "Good one."
Our waiter approaches. He's handsome, probably in his mid twenties. I'm sure he'll just love Lily.
"Hello, my name is Dominic. I'll be serving you tonight. Can I get you a drink as well?"
Lily looks up at him. "Yes, I'll have a Sex on the Beach. And add an extra shot please?"
He seems speechless for a moment. "Sure, are you ready to order ladies?"
"I need another minute. Nina?" She looks back at me.
"I'll wait."
"I'll be right back with your drink then." His eyes linger on Lily for a moment, which is long enough for me to change my mind.
"Wait! um, I'll have..." I grab the drink menu, trying to find something quickly.
"She'll have a Leg Spreader," she orders, and I look up.
"Yes," I agree. She's staring at me.
"Absolutely." Dominic leaves, and Lily says nothing.
I feel the need to say something. "These waiters when we go out, they're all so," I search for the word. "...friendly."
"Yeah, probably because they're trying to figure out which one of us they'd rather fuck."
I choke on my drink, surprised at how casually she said that. Not that I should be surprised.
"Nina, you've gotta lighten up. I talk about sex and I like to curse. You know that," she sighs. "Let's practice. Repeat after me. Fuck." She says the word slowly.
I roll my eyes, hiding my discomfort. "Fuck," I say in an exasperated tone.
"Shit."
"Shit," I repeat.
"Mother fucking goddamn cunt." She annunciates this precisely.
"Lily!" I laugh, glancing around.
"Say it," she dares me, grinning as she leans into me.
"Mother fucking goddamn cunt," I say, staring her straight in the eyes.
"Ok, last one," she lowers her voice, not breaking eye contact. "I want you to fuck me. I want you to bend me over and lick my pussy until I come in your mouth."
I blink, stunned. Is she coming on to me? Does she really want me to say that? My face must show the panic I feel.
She laughs and slaps my arm. "I'm kidding! I didn't think you'd go for that one."
I'm still speechless. Why am I freaking out? She's joking. Of course she's joking.
Lily looks down at the menu again. "So, what are you thinking? I'm starving so part of me wants to order a 12 oz. steak. Ooh! How about we do a few appetizers and share? Drinks and appetizers go very well together." She looks at me, smiling enthusiastically.
"Ok. Maybe the steamed artichoke?"
She snorts, "Try fried calamari."
I shake my head sadly. "I'm going to be five pounds heavier when I leave here."
Lily laughs, not looking up from the menu. "Don't even worry about it, curves are hot."
...
"So," Lily says, dragging the word out in an exaggerated way. "Now that we're on our second round of drinks, I think we can start delving into our deep dark secrets." She grins at me.
I only feel slightly buzzed, so I know that's not a good idea. She probably doesn't realize how dark my secrets really are. She doesn't need to know how truly messed up I am.
Lily waits for a moment, clearly expecting me to say something. When I do nothing but fidget nervously, she seems to realize that it's up to her to start this conversation. "So what's the deal with your mom? From the outside it looks like an extreme case of babying, but there's gotta be more to it than that, right?" She looks at me questioningly, not even looking down as she spears and eats a piece of calamari. That looks so good.
I try and speak casually, hoping she won't read too much into my tone of voice, which is strained.
"Well," I take a drink. If this topic is any indication of how the conversation will go tonight, I'm going to need to keep drinking. "I guess that's pretty close. She's always treated me that way. Like I'm a porcelain doll who's just so...delicate." Lily laughs at my expression of distaste. "It's partly my fault, I suppose. I've always let her. I've always played the part that she wanted me to." My voice trails off toward the end, and I look down at my hands, which are resting on my napkin.
Lily nods her head for a moment, contemplating what I said. "But why? I mean, you're an adult now. Who cares what your mom thinks?"
"I do... She's been the only person in my life that supported me unconditionally. I know that she's..." I hesitate, "...flawed. I think she tries to live her dreams through me. She was a dancer until she became pregnant, and she gave up her life to have me. I am her life now. I can't just abandon her." I need Lily to understand this. I'm not sure why, but it feels important.
"OK, I understand. I just think that she's holding you back because you're all she has." She waits for me to look up at her and make eye contact. "You have to lead your own life, Nina. If you want to dance, you can. If you don't, well then you don't have to. You can go out, you can have sex, and you shouldn't have to answer to her, or anybody else."
I don't know what to say, but I'm feeling a bit flushed. It always feels like she's putting me on the spot. Talking to Lily is hard. "Let's talk about something else, please?"
Lily doesn't respond and reaches for a piece of pita bread. She uses it to scoop some dip. Her eyes roll back as she chews, a look of complete ecstasy gracing her face. She's just so beautiful... I can't stop staring.
"God, this dip is heaven. Have you tried it?" She holds out a piece of bread with dip, smiling enthusiastically.
I shake my head a bit. "Actually, I don't think I should-"
"Stop it, Nina," she interrupts. Her face doesn't hold room for argument.
"OK, fine," I sigh. She looks at me expectantly as I take the tiniest bite I can. As soon as it hits my tongue, I can't help but moan. "Mmmmm... that's so good."
I scarf down the rest and start to reach for another piece. This is so embarrassing. I don't want Lily to think I'm a cow, but I can't just have one bite of that and be done. Before I reach the plate, Lily slides it out of my reach.
"Repeat after me," she commands seriously. "Mmmm... that is so fucking good."
This is becoming a bit much, but I don't want her to get bored with me. "Mmmm... that is so fucking good."
"Good girl." Her grin is infectious, and I have to look away for a moment to compose my face.
"Is it my turn to ask a question?" I ask. Lily nods. "Why did you leave San Francisco? And how did you end up here?" I really know nothing about Lily, but if feels like she knows so much about me. It isn't fair.
"Well, I left because there was nothing for me there. My family is basically non existent," she says in a casual way that makes me think she's hiding how she really feels about that. "The friends I had were nothing more than people to go out and party with... Except for Ashley."
She stares off to the side for a moment, looking lost in thought. I wonder who Ashley is? I stay silent, waiting for her to continue.
She snaps out of it. "Anyway, I was living with my boyfriend when I found out he was dippin it elsewhere, if you know what I mean." She winks at me. "And by elsewhere I mean his best friend." She adds this on like it's no big deal.
"Oh, that's..." I'm lost for words.
"By the way, his best friend is a guy. I've gotta tell you, I didn't see that one coming, and I have excellent gaydar."
I didn't expect that. "Oh! well that's..." I'm starting to repeat myself. Great.
Lily laughs, flipping her hair over her shoulder. "I'm over it. I didn't even tell him that I knew. I just spent all of my time trying to figure out a plan to get the hell out of there. Then I got wind that there was a spot opening up over here and I begged the director at my company to send me. He did, and here I am." She smiles at me and knocks back the rest of her drink.
"That's interesting. And New York appealed to you that much? I would love to live in California. All of that sunshine..." It makes me happy just to think about it. I always feel better when it's warm and sunny.
"I'm not going to lie, I miss the weather, but I think this works better for me. The vibe is different over here... these are my type of people."
I snort. "What, aggressive, rude, and impatient?"
"No!" She laughs loudly, throwing her head back. She really has such a pleasant laugh. "Well OK, yes, but I think it's all about being fake and real. It's real here, and I like that."
I don't agree with her, but I don't say it. Instead, I finish my drink. "Ready for another round?"
Lily laughs again, delighted.
We're half-way through our third round, and I'm definitely feeling more comfortable. Maybe it's Lily, maybe it's the liquor, but either way I'm speaking more freely and actually having a nice time. I haven't had fun in such a long time. It feels foreign, but definitely welcome.
Lily's telling me the fiftieth outrageous story of the night, but I don't even mind. The stories are entertaining, but even better is watching Lily tell them. Her story telling is animated and definitely exaggerated, but it's truly mesmerizing.
When she gets to the funny part, I can't help but laugh out loud. "No way! Your shampoo?"
"I'm not joking, it was next to the sink! I just pretended it didn't happen and moved the bottle back to the bathroom. He's by far the weirdest roommate I've ever had."
I ponder her words. "Why on earth would anyone ever wash dishes with shampoo? That makes no sense."
"Oh! That's not the worst. This part just skeeves me. Let me start by saying that I'm a freak about tap water. If I'm going to drink it, it has to be filtered. So naturally, I bought a Britta filter."
"Naturally," I laugh, rolling my eyes.
"Well, Rick has a girlfriend who sleeps over the majority of the time. She's nice and all, but at night when they have sex she's unbelievably obnoxious. I'm talking screaming for dear life."
"Oh nooooo!" I cover my eyes, playing scared.
"Yeah, it's like, "Oh GOD! Rick," she yells, startling me. "Fuck, you're so good! Ahhhhhh!" Lily closes her eyes and fakes an orgasm face. Wow.
"Shhh!" I put my finger to my lips. "People are looking," I whisper dramatically.
Lily laughs. "Anyway, he started stealing the water pitcher and bringing it to his room after they had sex, for like, the entire night, which is think i completely disgu-"
"Ladies, can I get you anything?" Dominic has approached the table again. I guess Lily's sex noises caught his attention.
Lily looks at me. "What do you say, Nina?"
I don't even hesitate to answer. "Another round please," I ask politely. "Oh, and make them both Leg Spreaders."
Lily is amused by this, and Dominic leave. As soon as he's gone I turn to Lily.
"I think it's you he's after."
Lily shakes her head. "Nuh-uh. It's totally you."
"Do you want to bet on it?" I ask.
"Absolutely. What are the stakes?" Lily thinks for a moment, and then smiles devilishly as she arrives at the answer. "How about the bill? BUT whoever he wants is the one who has to pay."
I laugh. That's a good one. "Agreed. I hope you have enough cash," I grin, taunting her. I really am starting to love drinking. Actually, I love the person that I am drinking.
"Don't worry baby, I'll charge it."
Dominic arrives with our drinks, and once he leaves Lily and I clink glasses, metaphorically shaking on it.
...
We're drinking our fifth round now. I don't think I'm going to be able to stand when we leave here. I'm really too small to drink like this, but Lily seems to have no problem with it. Obviously I have to keep up with her.
"We've gotta stop soon," Lily groans, echoing my thoughts. "If not, I'll probably end up leaving with Dominic over there." She lazily gestures with her thumb over to our waiter.
"Oh, you already know that you lost the bet, huh?" I giggle a bit, and then imitate Lily by dropping my head back onto the booth.
"No, I just know that you're kind of a prude," I look at her, offended. Except I'm drunk so I probably look like that kid from Home Alone. "...and I'm kind of a slut." She shrugs.
"I am not a prude."
"Oh really," she drawls sarcastically. "When was the last time you had sex? And you had to be awake for it." I'm going to ignore that last part.
"Fuck... I don't know." I see Lily do a little fist pump when I curse.
"That's what I thought. You're not a virgin, right?"
"No, but I'm not experienced like you, I'm sure." That might have sounded a bit snotty.
She laughs and rolls her head to look at me. "Did you just call me a slut?"
"No, but I'm pretty sure you called yourself one."
We both look at each other seriously, and then bust into laughter.
"I did, didn't I?" Lily says when she starts to calm down.
I twist my body to face her. I shouldn't do that so fast, it makes my stomach jolt. "Tell me a crazy sex story that happened to you?"
"Ooh, sex story time. I love it!" She perks up at this. She thinks for a moment, but that moment quickly becomes at least a minute. Or maybe it feels that way?
"I'm waiting," I say, drumming my nails on the table.
"Um," Lily looks hesitant. "It's kind of embarrassing and I don't want you to feel... awkward." She says awkward in a dramatic way that only someone who's completely inebriated would use.
"I won't. When I'm drunk I can handle anything." My assertive voice makes me sound like a little kid making a promise that they absolutely cannot keep.
Lily snorts. "Sure you can. OK, well, I was at a bar once, and I met someone that was just soooo sexy, I can't even describe it. Anyway, somehow we ended up having sex in a car around the corner from the bar-"
"Wait, somehow? How do you somehow end up having sex in a car?" I can't help but laugh at this.
"I was probably on something. Now let me finish. Anyway, it was pretty intense." She chuckles. "Then they started choking me mid-sex and saying stuff like, 'Oh, you like that you dirty slut? Yeah, you fuckin like that!' I didn't know what to do!"
By this point I'm clutching my sides because they hurt so much from laughing. All night, Lily's been making me laugh. "Wait, so what did you do?" I ask, once I've pulled myself together enough to breathe.
"I went with it," Lily shrugs. "And then, I bend my head back," she bends her head back comically and then lifts her head up again to look at me, "you know, because I was lying on my back." She gestures at me in a, "you get it?" kind of way, and once I nod she throws her head back again and continues. "I bend my head back, and that's when I notice that there's a guy a foot outside the window, watching us and jerking off."
I hand flies to my mouth in horror. "Oh my God, no! That's..." I search for a word strong enough to describe how repulsed I am. "... Oh my God!" I couldn't think of anything. Now I'm the one talking in an exaggerated, slightly slurred voice.
Lily is dying laughing, randomly choking at different points. I try to pat her on the back, but she gestures to me that she's fine.
"I'd be so. creeped. out!" I continue. The volume of my voice has reached ridiculous heights, so I try and tone it down. "He didn't scare you? Not the perv, the guy you were having sex with."
"No, she didn't," Lily answers when her coughing subsides and she looks at me.
My drunken haze makes it difficult to process what she said. "She di-" And that's when her words sink in. She. Got it.
"Are you freaked out?" Lily asks. I realize I haven't said anything.
"No, no! I'm fine. Sorry, I'm just a little surprised. I thought you were straight. You always talk about guys." It's fine, Nina. There's no reason to not be fine with this. Stop panicking.
"Nina, I lived in San Francisco for 10 years. The gayest city in the country. Of course I've fooled around with girls," she says, Oh, of course.
"Oh, so are you like," I hiccup, "a lesbian?" I clutch at my chest, trying to calm my breathing. This isn't successful because I hiccup a second later.
"Noooo," Lily says this like the idea is ridiculous. "I've never dated a woman, only guys. I'm not opposed to it, but mostly I've just... you know." She makes an extremely suggestive face at me.
"Licked their pussies?" The words sound harsh to my ears but I really don't care.
Apparently Lily loves it. She shrieks and claps her hands, laughing obnoxiously. Now people are definitely looking at us. "Yes! Yes, I've licked pussy and I like it."
I blow a kiss at the nasty woman sitting a few tables over and glaring at us. It only makes her more angry, and I laugh just when Lily scoots over and rests her head heavily on my shoulder. It's... nice. I rarely have physical contact with people. Dancing, sure, but not like this.
"I'm sure you're good at it," I mumble, patting her on the head.
"Oh, right," Lily says, her voice muffled by my shoulder. "I forgot you had a wet dream about me. I guess now I know I was good." I hear the smile in her voice.
Her comment makes me squirm a bit and I readjust, gently pushing her off of me. I roll my eyes. "It was just a dream. Stop flattering yourself."
"Yeah, yeah, you love me." She's stretching and cracking her neck and back.
I gasp in mock surprise. "How'd you guess?"
"My fantastic gaydar." She winks at me, or I think that's what she's doing. It's hard tell, but it was definitely some funny face.
"Oh right, I forgot."
Lily laughs. "Fuck off."
Don't worry, I will... Whoa. What?
Lily sighs and drops her head back against the booth again. "I'm completely shit-faced." Her drunk face is hysterical. "They make REALLY, really good drinks here."
I think about what she just said. "Where are we again?" I laugh at how stupid I am right now.
"Uhh... Ianelli's?" I guess she's as stupid as I am.
"Oh riiiight." The name sounds familiar. "I definitely think I'm drunk. Fuck," I slap my forehead and I'm sure Lily's smiling at my use of fuck. "I really don't want to see my mom."
Lily motions to Dominic for the check. "Don't go home then. Stay at my place." The way she says that makes me feel weird, reminding me of the Lily that tricked and lied to me.
I hesitate, feeling a moment of sobriety. "Honestly, you think I want to listen to Rick's girlfriend all night?" I laugh and hold my breath, waiting to see if she bought it.
She does. "Good point. But you're welcome to stay if you want."
"I really should just deal with her, but maybe next time..."
She looks at me like I've said something that she's been waiting for all night. "So there will be a next time?" Her face becomes serious, and her brilliant eyes pins me to the spot, hypnotizing me.
"Here's your check ladies." Dominic's back. Perfect timing. He looks at me for a second and then hands me the check. "Oh, and I left something in there for you," he says to me quietly, and then he walks away.
The second Dominic's gone, Lily grabs the check out of my hand. "What is it?" Her large eyes are scanning the paper rapidly. Then she freezes, and a smug grin starts to spread over her face.
I groan. "Did I just lose?"
Her smile is gigantic and she giggles drunkenly. Very not Lily. "You totally just lost. I am so good! I am the champion, la la la la la la."
"Well fuck," I mutter, making her burst into another round of giggles and add a little victory dance. I take back the check and see his number scribbled under his name. How annoying.
"Ahh, I love the word fuck coming out of your mouth. It's hot."
I finish counting the money and grin at her. "OK, ready to go?"
...
Getting a cab was difficult. Mainly because we were both a bit too drunk to stand. When we finally got one, we practically fell into the back. In fact, we did fall because I hit my head against the other door.
"I had a lot of fun tonight," I whisper to Lily. We're half way to my apartment.
"I know, me too." She's looking out the window, her head resting back against the seat. She rolls it the other way to look at me, and I'm suddenly struck with a vivid memory of us in a cab, her looking at me the same way, and then her hand rubbing me between my legs. I clear my throat loudly. "Are we friends now?" she asks, having no idea about my train of thought.
"There could be a next time," I say quietly, smiling at her in what I hope is a completely friendly way.
Her lips twitch slightly at the corners, and then she sighs and closes her eyes. We stay silent through the rest of the ride. When we finally approach my apartment, I take out money and hand it to the driver.
"Bye, Lily." She looks over at me, just realizing that we're at my place. I get out of the cab. "I'll see you later, OK?"
Lily's drunken, droopy eyes look strangely seductive. "Night, Nina," she says, her voice raspy. She gives me a little wave, and I return the gesture before slamming the door shut. I walk up to the building, and as I'm walking through the door my foot gets caught and I trip, slamming into the door. I look behind me, mortified, but luckily the cab has already pulled away. Thank God.
The knee I just hit against the door is killing me as I walk up the steps. I quietly let myself into the apartment and get to my room as quickly as possible.
"Fuck!" I mutter to myself, rubbing my knee. I see my forgotten cell phone laying on my bedside table.
I take off my coat and flop back onto the bed, grabbing my phone. You know you're wasted when you have difficulty working your own phone. I have a couple missed calls and one text message. I open it.
The text is from Lily, sent three minutes ago: I saw that :)
Oh God... I groan, rolling over. My feeling of embarrassment quickly becomes giddy excitement, for some reason. The next thing I know, I'm laughing hysterically. Laying on my bed, drunk as a skunk, holding my cell and laughing like a maniac. Oh no, I'm not crazy at all.
