Forgive me, readers. Tut mir leid. Really. I've been suffering with writer block for a while. But I finally came around and decided to update this. I am a little sick today. Half the day I've been distracting myself with German lessons. Oh and by the way "tut mir leid" is translated as "I am sorry" - still suck but I'm working on it. Maybe if I learn fluently, I can publish another fanfiction in German. Who knows.
Any hoo, enjoy this and tell me if you hate or love it. I'm human - not perfect and won't be too hurt no matter how positive or negative your opinions are. And again, really, really sorry. And review so I can know what you think. Bye. Auf Wiedersehen (bye/ see you again).
P.S. We have more new characters here. Don't forget them. And sorry no Captain Swan moment just yet. I am working on it for the next chapter. So sorry. But I will try to make the next chapter really good to please you all. Again sorry.
After the meal, Emma parted ways with her companions. Granny excused her from kitchen duty for today in order for Emma to heal from the incident that occurred last night.
Emma had no interest of returning back to her room so she went out to the heart of the castle, the same place where she found Graham and the baroness the other night. However, the distingushment from what she witnessed last night is that there was more only company present other than two lovers pressed against the wall - a small crowd of the townspeople: all women, children, and men. She walked pass a group of boys that played around with a ball made of shredded clothing.
Some of the townspeople stared at her and whispered to one another. She was building more attention from the townspeople by the minute. Perhaps her appearance seems a bit foreign to them - so far, she has never seen any girl or boy with blonde hair like hers nor not much of a single curl.
From her left, she watched some men share a lighted pipe together. They had their backs pressed against one of the tall firm walls. She found them absolutely irritating when their eyes looked directly at her and whistled at her. In silence she walked onward and ignored their shouts that went something like "Come right here, we won't bite!".
She came to a stop as she came across an unreserved side of one of the walls where she found a young man seated on a stool while peeling an apple with a knife for a little girl who stood beside him. Emma gave the girl a smile and the girl responded to her by shying away, climbing up on the young man's lap.
Emma pressed her back against the wall and crossed her arms across her chest. Her eyes scanned through her surroundings in order to thoroughly memorize every scrap of the area of the castle. The floor is solidly made of stones: black and filthy. The townspeople are present only by daylight and are not in sight by nightfall. There is only one gate that is well guarded, and she is certain Graham makes certain that someone watches over from day to night. So far, unfortunately, this is all she can gather.
How do I get back to that river if I'm forced to be with Graham at night? Running away in daylight is out of the question. I'll be easily caught. Huh. What do I do? Just what?
"Lass." A voice interrupted her from her thoughts.
Her eyes looked down at a hand holding up a sliced apple. The young man who was still sitting on his short stool nudged her lightly on the hand with his own.
"Take it. It's good."
Emma left her back from the wall and faced the man. She took the slice of the fruit with a smile and took a bite from it. "That is good. Thank you."
"I'm Jefferson Hatter."
"Nice to meet you. I'm Emma."
He gestured down to his daughter. "This is my daughter Grace."
"Nice to meet you, Grace."
Grace did not respond and only buried her face on her father's chest. Emma chuckled.
"She's adorable. How old is she?"
"Already nine this year."
"I see."
Now that she had a closer at the man, he did stand out from all the others. His attire was almost unison as the other men she saw: a worn out white shirt, pants loose and long to the ankles, and his hair is short from his ear. However, he looks well groomed and clean, and from below his ankles, there's an exposure of a overwhelming patterns and colors of his socks through the small holes on his shoes.
Already, Emma found this man to be an interesting acquaintance. And after all, with her situation of imprisonment, the production of allies will be most needed.
"So..So Hatter? Why Hatter? Does your occupation involve making hats?"
"Yes. Well, my job strictly is performed for the baroness. You see it's not possible for anyone in town to afford any hats, so I've been working for one client from the past nine years."
"Wow. Are you any good?"
"Good enough to please the baroness."
Emma took another bite of her apple. She looked down at his hands, each ones are gloved but the material only reaches to the knuckles of the fingers that leaves the rest bare and exposed. She pointed at the old scars and redness on his fingers with her slice of apple.
"I didn't think making hats can be dangerous. How did you get those scars?"
Jefferson sighed. "My hands used to be soft and gentle - Grace hardly touches my hands anymore. But making hats are purely work that tires these old things," he looked down at his poorly conditioned fingers. "I can hardly see in the morning - takes nearly a full day to at least finish making three. The baroness' orders and her expectations for each style are far high and had remained them away since the beginning..Huh. That woman is impossible to please." He lifted his eyes and kissed Grace on the head.
"I also plow in the field with the other men by noon. Hat making is not entirely blamed alone for what has happened to my hands." He continued
"Oh. You know if you want, there's a solution for that."
He arched a brow. "Oh really? Do tell."
"Honey is a good remedy. Apply some onto the hand daily. Leave it to dry every time you use it and wash it off. It'll go away in time."
"Apply honey onto my scars? A strange remedy that is. Have you studied medicine in the past, Emma?"
Oh crap.
"My uh..My husband's physician taught me these methods. Um well he uh..Uh well he always liked to go hunting and every time he returns I find him always getting injured. Honey turned out to help those scars fade by the time his wounds healed," she quickly lied with her eyes lowered to the ground.
"Husband? I didn't think you were married. Where is he now?"
"Well, he was murdered. I was next to be killed but for some reason my kidnappers tossed me in the middle of nowhere, bounded. And that's how I got here," she lied again.
This time she bravely met his eyes. But for some reason, her voice lost its confidence. Lying was just not her best talent.
"My condolences."
"N-No need for that. But thank you." She let out an awkward cough and quickly thought of some other subject to change the conversation. "...S-So before you go to bed, you should inform your wife to bring you some honey. Those scars look old but they will fade a little if you put enough effort to do what I say."
Grace suddenly embraced her father's waist and breathed a little heavily. Jefferson soothed her by padding her on the back.
Emma was perplexed by this. "Did I say something wrong?"
Jefferson shook his head. "No, nothing like that. My wife she uh..she passed away last spring."
Oh gosh. Good job Emma Swan.
"I'm sorry. I had no idea."
"You couldn't have known. It's quite alright. At least, we now have something in common: we are familiar with the emptiness that life can do for us when we lose someone we love."
"Right..Emptiness."
A farmer with a filthy stain on his left cheek walked pass the three. Emma caught him giving Jefferson a worried look and a snarl at her. She sighed as the man was gone.
"Does this town really think I'm a whor-" She bit her tongue, reminding herself at that instant that there is a child present. "Jefferson, I'm sorry, but how is that you are not ditching me right now?"
"Do you consider it eerie for a complete stranger to introduce himself to a newcomer in town, out of kindness?"
"Not at all but the fact you're talking to me is the eerie part. Everyone here seems to think I'm some..You know, a girl who's condemned with a scandal."
"I don't believe in gossips or the opinions of these villagers, Emma. But in my defense, I am no proper example to minors who are preparing themselves to be maturely grown. Yet I respect my own judge of character, and even by talking to you now, I can see there's no evil within you, or diseased with lust."
"How can you tell? You just met me."
"If you underestimate my judgment, then are you what these people think you are?"
"Of course not."
"Then I believe you."
"But I could be lying to you."
"Like the lie you just made up about this husband of yours?"
Am I that bad at lying? Oh God.
Emma licked her lips and lowered her eyes to the ground. "How did you know that?"
"I have experience with the weakness that many women have. Lying is certainly one of them. If you were telling the truth about this husband, you wouldn't be stuttering or thinking hard for a perfect lie that can convince me it's true."
"You caught me. But what you still said that we have something in common between us. You knew that I lied about my husband, so why did you still say that?"
"Because you seem like a person who has lost at least someone in your life. You seem brave and head-strong, in person. But there's still vague signs within you that shows me nothing but scars and darkness that are quite heartbreaking to see. Have you lost someone in your life, Emma?"
"Can I trust you on this secret? If Graham finds out or anyone that I lied about -"
Jefferson raised his hand to stop her. "My lips are sealed. Your secrets will be safe with me."
"..I have lost someone..four people in my life. I fear that there will be another missing."
"And who is that?"
Happy..God, will I ever see him again.
"A friend. My only friend."
~ Emma handed the small sealed jar of honey she stole from the kitchen to Jefferson. Grace nibbled on her lower lip as she stared directly at the sticky substance contained in that very jar. When her father was close to taking the jar from Emma, Grace quickly beat him and took it with her small hands and pressed it to her chest, protecting it with her chin pressed on its seal. Jefferson smiled and picked his daughter up in his arms.
"Don't forget what I told you, Jefferson?"
"I won't. So I guess we're friends now then?"
"Yes, friends. Where will you leave Grace anyway?"
"To the church. The abbess there looks after some of the children without a penny charge." He kissed Grace's cheek. "Say goodbye, darling."
Grace waved at Emma and Emma did the same.
"Goodbye, Jefferson. And be careful."
"I will. Pleasure talking to you, Emma. Goodbye."
She watched Jefferson walk away. He walked toward a loaded cart and climbed up on top of it. The driver started the cart once he was on and drove away.
He'll be useful. Perhaps he has some duties he attends to at night, I hope he does the next time I see him.
A warm hand suddenly grabbed her by the elbow and turned her around. She gasped as the stranger pulled her in close.
"Making friends, are we?"
"God damn, you scared me, Graham. Does it hurt to just say hello next time?"
"You and your disgraceful tongue."
"Oh please, don't start with disrespect with me, sheriff. What happened last night cannot compare with saying 'Jesus Christ'."
"You never could forget can you?"
"Forgetting is something that's not possible for me to do anymore. Now let me go."
He tightened his grip on her elbow and inched his lips closer to one of her ears.
"You are always watched, Emma. I have spies who follows you everywhere you go and they report to me of your whereabouts. So if you ever dare to plan an escape from this place, it'll cost the kind treatment you receive so far. And believe me, Granny won't help you in that part if you ever attempt to leave this place. Is that clear?"
"Why am I not allowed to leave?"
"Because you are lying too much about your true identity. Until I find out, the baroness will decide then if you should be set free or not."
"Does that bitch treat all her guests like this?"
"Only those who refuses to tell her the truth."
"If I am to stay here then, does..does that mean.." She dropped her voice low for only him to hear. "..I can sleep alone tonight?"
He kissed her cheek. "I forgot to sleep alone. Until I learn to, that will be arranged."
She lifted his hand to his chest and pushed him away. He chuckled and released her elbow.
"You're a pervert."
"I will see you soon."
"Trust me, that won't happen."
~ Emma soon discovered one of Graham's spies. Wherever she went, she sensed many of the male servants take a glimpse of her and even appear in the same room whenever she moved to the next. She did not fairly like the idea very much, but she had no power over Graham at the moment. When he's near her, it's a challenge for her to behave herself. She never realized over the great power he has in this town, despite him being dominated under the baroness's control.
Along the empty hallway, she walked across it and head to the second floor. But she sped up her pace suddenly, brisk walking as vigorously as her legs can manage that effectively made Graham's spy tired/ From behind her shoulder she can hear the man struggling to keep up and breathing heavily through his open mouth. Ever since, she recovered from the drowning experience, her body was enjoying the very feeling of being healthy: this morning, it was the first time she had the real appetite to eat meals enjoyably, and she can feel no headaches or discomfort since the air smelled so clean, cool, and fresh - no more of the foul, familiar smell she lived with in the asylum.
The thought of exercise suddenly gave her an idea. She made a turn and headed back to her room. Her spy waited for her outside, standing a few inches away from her door with his back pressed against the wall. After a short wait, the door opened and Emma came out wearing the most strangest attire that was taken aback from her spy.
She had one of Graham's pants on with the legs cut short from above the knees, and she wore only a corset over one of his clean white shirts tucked in deeply in his pants. In order to keep the pants up, she made several holes around the waist of the pants and inserted a piece of fabric and tightened its ends, at last, made a knot that served its purpose as a belt that was less effective than a real belt but it prevented the pants from sliding down.
"It'll be no fun watching me, jerk. I'm going out."
She said blindly to Graham's spy, who took a long moment to compose himself, and walked on.
~ The attention she received from the other villagers were not as welcoming as before. She proudly ignored them and headed to the same empty wall where she last spoke to Jefferson and his loving daughter. Some of the villagers continued to gossip at her in disapproval. But others, generally, the men, watched her with curiosity.
She first climbed up on the wall and sat on the top edge. She loosened her body and took the time to stretch from her legs up to her arms. After awhile, she was ready to begin.
Her spy was near and similarly watched her like many of the men did.
Emma placed her hands straight on the edge of the wall and lifted the weight of her body up. She breathed carefully from her mouth and slowly straightened her legs out forming her body to a perfect capital "L". But in order to challenge herself, she performed the exercise the same way as push-ups without putting her legs down or slowing down.
The weather was just wonderfully hot enough to help Emma produce enough sweat to the point her shirt was growing damp, and attached to her bare skin that made it possible for her cleavage and corset to be exposed through the see-through material of the shirt. This attracted more attention, many of the men became her audience and watched her. In the eyes of the women, they found it absolutely disapproving to have a young girl physically performing a strange exercise in a position that they find slightly erotic and awkward. But at the same time, their opinions toward Emma now is also jealousy - she was attracting too much attention to the men that gives her the convenient chances to take their husbands away; marriage after all is survival to them
Emma changed to a few different exercises after short breaks. She yearned for music and a private room to perform this. But the last thing she would want is to leave the floor of her bedroom filled with puddles of sweat, nor have anyone help her clean the mess she made on her own.
As she changed her position, she sat back down and pressed her legs tightly against the wall. She carefully leant her head back and performed at least ten sets of sit ups with her hands placed in the back of her head. She struggled a few moments and it frustrated her when she started to receive whistles from the men.
Her skin shined like a diamond, completely damp and making it difficult for her legs to continue to hold against the wall.
Her focus started to lessen when one of the men stepped forward and climbed up on the wall to be near her. She turned her neck and watched the man. He looked to be about her age. His chin is clean and his clothes were all worn and old. But he had a handsome face, other than an old scar that reached from the crease of his eyelids to his brow, he was quite charming from the very looks of him.
Emma could not help but laugh as she saw the young man attempting to do the exact position she's in. He looked to be quite strong and when he started to perform the same exercise she is doing, he did not struggle and even laughed at his friends of how easy it was. But she devised a quick plan for him to no longer think that way.
She stopped and sat upright to properly speak to him. "What's your name?"
Her cheeks were inflamed and sweat continuously dripped down from her brow to her chin. But her voice was still steady.
The young man stopped as well and turned his eyes to meet hers. "Andrew. I'd shake your hand if you weren't sweating so much."
"I don't need handshakes. We met. I know your name. Introduction closed. Now let's get real. You really dare challenge me, Andrew?"
"This doesn't seem so hard. I fail to see how this is a challenge."
"You know what? You're right. You look quite fit. Tell me, do you work in the field too?"
"For two years I have, miss."
"Well, that must have strengthened your biceps by now. What do you say we go for a real challenge since this is too easy for you."
She took a moment to catch her breath and gave her arms a good stretch. But her eyes did not leave her opponent.
Andrew crossed his arms across his chest. He too breathed heavily. But by the way his arms were crossed, it gave the advantage for Emma to see how lean he was. His arms were certainly built - quite heavily than she was. A challenge like an arm wrestle will be a complete embarrassment for her. She must think of some activity that can be fairly performed in a neutral level for both of them.
"Where I come from men always challenge on this one exercise that's very popular. Do you think you're capable enough to challenge with me on that?"
"Will I win anything?"
"Well, I don't think a reward is relevant right now. I thought your purpose of even getting up here with me in the first place was to prove to all your friends here your strength, to prove what an easy target I am. So prove it to them you are stronger than me. That'll be your precious reward. What do you say?"
He eyed his friends who were amused by the scene. Then he returned his eyes at Emma and gave her a confident nod with a determined smirk curved on his mouth.
"Very well. We'll need two people to help us out." She turned her neck to look about at her audience. "Anyone willing to volunteer?"
Two young boys stepped forward. They too looked about to be Emma's age. But compared to Andrew, they were filthy with dirt and mud, and their hair was tangled with hay. The way they laughed as they neared the wall and winked at Andrew proved to her the two were one of Andrew's friends.
Emma pointed to one of the boys and gestured her hand to step forward. "You'll be my partner. You and your friend back there are to count how many we do. Just don't mess up. Can you promise me that?"
They both nodded.
"What is your name?"
"Keith, miss."
"Can you help me get down?"
He was a bit eager when she allowed him to take her waist. She didn't care very much that his hands were filthy with her sweat. After all he was already filthy, and it's also the purpose to fulfill her revenge on Graham by ruining his clothes, so she feels no harm done. She thanked him when he got her down to her feet.
Andrew also got down and watched her next move.
She sweetly smiled at Keith and raised her head to meet his eyes. "Keith, do you think you can lend me your shirt? I'll be needing it for this challenge. I promise to give you another one if I ruin it too much."
Graham has plenty anyway.
The crowd of the men reacted with "oo"s and "aww"s . She paid no attention to their laughter and quick clapping. Keith was not a shy boy. He removed his shirt and handed it to her. She thanked him again, but she eyed his lean torso with a quick glance. His body was well built and quite leaner than hers. Now she wonders if she underestimated these boys, they look far stronger and healthier than her.
But the challenge must go on, whether she wins or loses.
She didn't mind too much of how filthy the shirt was. Andrew watched her as she got down to the floor and neatly placed the shirt on the ground. Her hands pressed to the shirt and left it to spread apart by shoulder length. Then her legs straightened and her body was lifted up by the strength of her feet that were pressed together. It was an appropriate demonstration of a plank position. As Andrew saw this, he removed his shirt as well and copied exactly what she did.
"I'll show you a demonstration. This is called push-up. For this exercise, this is what you do."
She lowered herself down to a proper push-up to the point her chest was only a centimeter away from the ground and lifted her body slightly up - still holding the proper plank position.
"That's considered one. The challenge is to do that as many as possible. All your friends have to do is count how many each of us does. Whoever does the most wins. Understand the game, Andrew?"
Andrew nodded his head. His arms did not shake and he was holding his body up quite well for now.
Let's see if the rest of your body is the great Hercules, you ass.
"Let's begin. And...Go!" Emma announced.
Emma trained herself with these type of strenuous exercises everyday in the asylum. She learned to master each exercises to the point she can do it longer and faster as her body can manage. But it was refreshing and very different to finally do it with someone for the very first time.
Andrew performed the exercise quite well. But several times he was distracted to look up at his friends, and smiled at their loud encouragement to beat Emma at this challenge. Emma paid no attention to them and focused on her speed and the steadiness of her body.
Both of them were growing exhausted but their determination to win forced their bodies to continue, abandoning the very idea to be the first to give up and undergo the humility of losing the game.
"Fourty-five, fourty-six, fourty-seven..." Keith announced the amount Emma is doing so far aloud.
Emma was beating Andrew only by two push-ups. All she can think of in her head is to embarrass him.
The crowd of men suddenly separated and the whistling and shouting died down. Emma breathed heavily and continued on with her performance. But she was stopped when two firm hands grabbed her by both arms and lifted her off the ground.
She gasped to see Graham. Her face burned hot as fire as he scooped her body into his arms.
"Graham! Put me down!"
"Shut your mouth." He angrily growled.
"I will not shut my mouth, jerk! Now put me down!"
She fought him and even kicked her legs in the air. But she stopped when she saw Andrew from behind Graham's shoulder. Andrew rose to his feet and received his triumph. She angrily raised her arm and waved.
"Hey it's not over yet! We'll have to play again!"
Andrew eyed her from behind the crowd of his gathered friends. He lifted his arms and gave her a nod. "Until then, miss! Be ready! I'll be ready for you!"
Despite her disappointment that she didn't get to finish the game, she laughed the way he winked at her. But the laughter died down immediately as her focus returned to Graham.
"Why are you such a party pooper? I was having fun, and you just had to ruin it."
"Your father certainly hired a bizarre tutor for your education. Is English your second language?"
"That's none of your concern. Why can't you leave me alone?"
"It's my job to look after you. Now being around with people like that is out of the question. You are forbidden to befriend anyone here. Do I make myself clear?"
"You're not my father. And I am positive as hell that no law even confirms you have the power to control me. I'm not a criminal you know or your slave. I'm a victim, God damn it. You're not even justifying it. How the fuck did you become a sheriff? Does the resume to become one is a bonus if you write down a oath that you'll be the secret slave to the great baroness whenever she needs company? Huh? Ha! You're no sheriff! You're not even a man! You're the slave, you know. You're the real prisoner."
Graham stopped immediately in his tracks. They were still outside and only inches away from the entrance. Some of the villagers who were present overheard every word they shared together. It was absolutely interesting in their ears, but astonished by the foul words that was spoken by a young girl to one of the dangerous man in town.
His dark intimidating eyes lowered down to her. She was not afraid, however. She was ready to hear any scream from him, any pain - she was prepared completely. His body trembled and boiled with rage. They both can hear the raising of his heart. The intensity of his eyes refused to fade, and her courage equally did the same.
"What? Did I say something wrong? Does the truth hurt, Graham? Jesus, did you actually think keeping me trapped in bed will soften me up? I'm not that easy and stupid either. I can care less what you and that baroness is planning together. But all I want is to be free. There are people who needs me and I have to get there immediately before all is too late. Now do me a good, final favor, take me to the river where you found me. That's all I ask. You can leave me there, for all I care. I just need to be back there."
"That's out of the question."
"It's a simple request. I'm not asking for much, Graham. I'm only asking you to take me back where you found me. Why is that not possible?"
"The baroness did not order me to take you anywhere. She demanded you to remain here in the castle. She offered you her hospitality and kind generosity. Since you still have nothing to offer her back, I suggest you to repay her by obeying her wishes."
"Well, then fuck her hospitality and fuck her God damn kind generosity."
"Watch your mouth."
"I will not watch my mouth. And why are you so afraid of betraying her? You stayed with me in my room when she wanted you all to herself last night. If you betrayed her then, why not do it again? What are you so afraid of?"
"I never betrayed her. She never ordered me that I couldn't stay. She only commanded for me to capture you. That was all."
"I'm guessing she does not know then." Her eyes quickly rolled to the corner and eyed a small group of married women who immediately looked the other way when she looked directly at them. "Of course, it won't be a secret for long. These people talk, Graham."
"I have nothing to fear. I have served well, Emma. Do not think anything can happen to me. Only worry for your own."
She sighed and leant her head back. Her eyes gazed up at the clear sky. The sunshine shone on her face, and she closed her eyes to feel the warmth of the sun on her eyelids. Graham shook her and growled at her to look at him. But she did not and even smiled.
"I'm not afraid of anything anymore. Death. Torture. Imprisonment. I've learned to forget what fear is...All it matters sometimes are memories. Memories..are very beautiful. Each one, I never realized the past could be so wonderful, so much better than the present."
"You speak as if there is no hell. Watch your words, the devil might catch you one day."
"The devil already caught me long, long ago, Graham. At least you lived above light and air, while I've lived in the underbelly of desertion. You'll never realize what the world can become in time. Within centuries, half the people here will be gone and hidden. You'll see from way below when you die. I'll be with you soon. I doubt there's anything I can do whether I'm trapped here in this time period, or go back to where I came from.
"..I have no hope anymore, Graham. Nothing..But I pointlessly keep fighting, fighting, fighting, and fighting till I grow exhausted and wish everything was a dream..All I've been surrounded by was the white walls, the locked doors, mad people, and Satan with the key to my room. That's I've ever lived with. Huh. Can you believe I want to return to that? Return to that living hell?"
Graham's anger melted and he was again calm. His brows furrowed in confusion and he was suddenly worried over what the strange words she speaking.
"Emma, what are you talking about?"
Tears built in her eyes. But she fought them and forced her smile to remain, though the corners of her mouth twitched slightly.
"Just silly talk..My nightmares are bothering me again. Huh. You must think me mad again."
"Perhaps it's best to give you something for present relief. A sleeping potion, perhaps."
"I don't need medicine. I just need peace. Take me to my room. I need to bathe. And I would really love to be anywhere where no one will be watching me, that spy of yours for example. Get rid of him or I will."
"We'll discuss that later."
He continued to walk onward and started his way to Emma's room - the ownership of the room at this point is a question since he still insists to share her bed with her.
"Later? Meaning when we go to sleep? No, Graham, I sleep on my bed, and you sleep with the baroness." Her eyes opened. Tears escaped from her eyes, but she quickly wiped them away. "I want to sleep alone. I don't want you next to me."
"I don't trust that you won't escape. I'll be more assured if I remain near you."
"You're impossible. Where the hell will I go? I don't even know the way back to that damn river."
"I will not change my mind, Emma. Just be silent, or else there will no bath for you."
She held her tongue and silenced as he demanded. But her anger did not disappear just yet. She was still furious over the whole situation.
