Chapter 4
* 24 standard hours later:
* An-Paj was stunned as he stared at the Council member before him. He had to be mistaken. "I beg you pardon?" he asked quietly, sitting up straighter in his office chair. The dark skinned Jedi before him did not just suggest what he thought he did.
"We have decided to send Meri to Urukier to recover. We have a Jedi center there; she will be able to recover in peace…away from the Temple. Alex will remain here, under your care, Master healer," Mace Windu repeated carefully.
"With all due respect, Master, you don't know what you're saying," the healer began, fighting to keep the disbelief from his voice. "Meri Irhanah cannot be sent away, not now. The state she is in is too fragile. I specified that in my report, you can't…,"
"Master Healer," Mace interrupted firmly. "We have read your report and we have come to a decision. Knight Irhanah will be sent to Urukier."
An-Paj stared dumbfounded at the Councilor before him for long moments. And then it began to sink in. The Council didn't want this revealed. If it were, they would be made to take a more forceful course of action, ending in expulsion for one or both of them. They needed Alex Arieh…he was a talented Jedi Master and with Jedi numbers dwindling they couldn't lose him over something like this.
However Meri….An-Paj's jaw hardened at the realization of what they were doing and everything within him that was healer cried against it. Because of Alex having more years behind his status he was placed above Meri in importance. And since the healer had implicated in his report that Meri might not survive this after her past history in this area, the Council was essentially condemning her to death.
"Master Windu," he began his voice almost shaking with repressed emotion. "You cannot send Meri away! She needs the Jedi now more than ever. You must realize what you're doing…we can't just turn our backs on her!"
The Councilor's dark eyes were full of remorse as he shook his head. "Master An-Paj, the Council has made its decision and I'm sorry."
"You're sorry?" An-Paj questioned, his blue skin beginning to flush almost purple in anger. "You are willingly killing one of our own and you are sorry?"
This time the dark eyes flashed in warning at the healer. "Remember your place, Master An-Paj. This matter is no longer of your concern. Have Knight Irhanah ready for travel by morning." With those words the Councilor swept to his feet and out of the healer's office.
**
Urukier
The Jedi center on Urukier was no more than a small building, built to accommodate only two Jedi at most. It was situated close to the beaches of Urukier and the rolling water and crashing waves could be seen from the back portico, where chairs had been placed for just such a pass time.
It was here that Meri sat slumped in one of the fine wicker chairs, her head tilted to the side, resting against the large wooden poles that supported the overhang. Her dark eyes, though looking toward the beach, were unfocused, and the large, dark circles under her eyes that marred her pale skin could have been mistaken for bruises.
The air was humid, but a gentle breeze blew and kept it from ever getting too warm. The air smelled fresh and had a salty tang and the waves could be heard in the distance as they crashed rhythmically onto shore. The entire set up was made to be comforting. But Meri wasn't comforted. She'd been on Urukier only two days, and already the change of scenery had worn off. It hadn't changed things. And it certainly hadn't changed the consuming acknowledgement of her failure.
Meri had trained for 24 years to achieve the status of Jedi knight only to realize that she had just been sent off to a remote planet out of the Jedi Order's way. She didn't pretend to understand why, but she could guess. And the only thing that seemed to stand out in her mind was her reaction at the knighting ceremony. At the time she had thought she couldn't help it, but she had gone back and analyzed it multiple times and finally come to the conclusion that she hadn't met the standard. She hadn't stood up to their expectations. They had told her differently, certainly, said that it wasn't unusual for a new knight to go off for some time alone to regroup his thoughts. Yet no time limit had been placed on her stay and in fact she'd been told she would be informed on when she would need to return. An assurance she didn't quite believe in.
But she no longer cared…about anything. Her tunics were rumpled and she hadn't changed them in a day. Her hair was unfettered and hanging down about her waist, a mass of tangles born from tossing and turning sleeplessly in bed. She had given up on that as well…She hadn't been able to sleep since she had awoken from the infirmary.
The healers had informed her that she'd experienced a trauma when her master broke their bond and that it wasn't entirely unusual for such a thing. She'd woken up disoriented, with a headache that had no equal before it; and the hungry dark hole within her had only grown stronger. She could no longer fight the sense of betrayal she felt toward Alex.
At the thought of the handsome Jedi Master, Meri couldn't admit to feeling or wishing that he would remember her. Now she only wanted to be left alone. She felt as though she had been torn into ten different directions and she no longer knew what she felt for him.
Admittance never would have passed through her lips, but she feared him. Never had she experienced such clawing biting pain and it hadn't dulled. Yet at the same time, she craved to be held in his arms, the only place she had ever felt safe. At any hint of those thoughts, Meri slammed them brutally out of her mind. Look what that had gotten her so far…look what loving him had accomplished. She wasn't worth anything sitting out here in the sand and her feelings and emotions had only created a useless Jedi. She was useless.
The wounded young woman was so consumed in thought that she didn't see the approaching figure until he was almost standing right next to her. Belatedly her Jedi senses registered the new presence and startled, she glanced up into the face above hers.
The man wasn't overly tall, and looked to be somewhere in his forties. His build was thick, but muscular and his hair was a brownish gray. His eyes were the deep gray/blue of a cloudy day and his face was kindly. He looked down on her and she didn't miss the surprise and then pity that came into his eyes. Immediately she drew the remains of her shattered defense around her and shuttered her expression.
"I hope I'm not intruding," he offered kindly. "But it is very rarely that any Jedi come to stay and in their absence I am responsible for the upkeep of the center."
Before she answered, Meri made move to stand up, but she tried too quickly and swooned as blackness covered her vision. Frantically her hand flayed for a hold on something and suddenly two strong hands grasped her wrist. Slowly her vision cleared and she saw the concerned gaze of the older man looking upon her.
"Are you alright?"
"Yes," she answered curtly, pulling her hands away from his. "I just forgot to eat this morning," she lied. In fact, she couldn't remember the last time she had eaten.
If he was skeptical, the man didn't show it. "I'm Dylan Saluone," he introduced himself and then looked at her expectantly.
Meri's eyes drifted away from his gaze briefly as she debated and then turned back to him. "You can just call me Meri," she answered shortly.
"Jedi Meri," he began, but Meri lifted her hand. "Please, just Meri." A bitter smile twisted her lips as he looked at her strangely.
He nodded before continuing. "Meri, if you need anything, please don't hesitate to ask. My wife and I live just down the beach."
"Thank you," she words sounded stiff even to her own ears.
"I also wanted to warn you against swimming in the water here. On the other side of the bay there are certain times swimming is safe, but here the undertows are too dangerous. They will pull you under if you wade out to far."
Meri nodded and again mumbled a 'Thank you,' though his warning hadn't escaped her notice. She felt his eyes studying her bedraggled appearance and she felt the first pangs of self-consciousness at the state she had allowed herself to fall in.
Dylan smiled warmly at her in a reassuring manner before taking a step back. "I'll let you get back to your peace and quiet. I just wanted to say hello and let you know about the water."
Meri dropped her eyes and then flushed when she realized she wasn't even wearing shoes. "Thank you," she said softly, the first hint of vulnerability creeping into her tone.
Meri didn't see, but Dylan's eyes softened as he looked at the young woman. "Perhaps you can come to dinner some evening. I'm sure my wife would love to meet you as well."
Without giving her a chance to answer he nodded in farewell and turned away. After he left, her eyes strayed to the blue/green water and white sandy beach before she headed inside.
