A/N: Okay, so I broke my promise, but this insisted on being written. As always, your support is much appreciated. I'll keep the promise of writing whatever you guys vote for, but first, please vote.
Disclaimer: *shrugs*
No one needed to know. No one needed to know anything Amelia Jones planned, or how she got what she wanted without saying a word. Had she known about Steve's cryogenic suspension? More or less, but she never knew where he had landed. Unlike what most people thought, she rarely said anything she didn't intend to, or anything that might not work out as she planned. After all, her subtle, underhanded tactics won her the loyalty of Natasha Romanov.
Those same tactics freed her from continuing the pretense of being a guy. All these years later, that moment still brought a smile to her face. Playing into the fool everyone, even England, considered her, she broke the news to the world on her own terms. Delightfully, everything went according to plan.
And England claimed she couldn't keep a secret or plan anything. Not that her plans were elaborate; she favored the simple and improvised as necessary.
The day SHIELD located Steve, Fury had called her.
"America," he always called her 'America' with no one else in hearing range, or over the phone, "We located Captain America."
Maybe that's all Steve was to Fury and SHIELD, a missing supersoldier and national icon; the man behind the image mattered little to SHIELD. At least it matter more to Fury than it had to the previous two directors, but less than he had mattered to Peggy or Howard. Part of the reason she pushed for Fury as director was his understanding that a man, a good man, existed behind the propaganda.
While she had known Steve would be located soonish, she almost wanted them to leave him in the ice. Despite the usual push and pull between her two identities, both sides worried about Steve waking up and the world he would find. America feared his disappointment, because he represented the ideal that the Nation longed to emulate, but would never be able to. A more personal, selfish really, dread originated in the Amelia half. The girl wanted her friend to remember the innocence that existed back then; the girl hoped her friend would hold that image in his mind and thus give it some life. Any interaction between her and him would destroy those desires.
Though, it wouldn't be the first time she took a personal hit for her people, or her future.
"How is he?"
No is he alive, or is he dead, or 'I'll start planning the funeral', just acceptance that the serum kept him alive.
"We'll start de-thawing him as soon as the plane lands."
"Inform me when he wakes up."
While she planned on avoiding him for now, she wanted to ensure she always knew about his condition.
Before hanging up, Fury had asked, "Do you want to see him?"
"No."
"Jones," he had appealed to the human side of her, "you could help him make the adjustment."
Another director wouldn't have said that, but Fury wasn't just any director. She recalled the bright, idealist young man who first joined SHIELD. Like her, he too developed a realistic understanding of the world, and pessimistic if Amelia was honest with herself. Then again, his whole Avengers Initiative would receive more attention once Steve woke.
Part of her insisted that she say 'yes' and 'I'll be there by nightfall', but she reigned in the impulse. "Major Amelia Jones is dead, that's all Steve needs to know about me. I trust you can create the appropriate documents to convince him?"
"Yes ma'am."
"Good, keep me apprised of the situation."
Of course, he followed her orders, more thoroughly than necessary. Naturally she saw right through his scheme; he hoped that by keeping her closely up to date would convince her to reconnect with him. Not that it worked.
Ever since Steve moved in with her, she wondered if Fury planned it all somehow; thinking that if he couldn't get her to go to him, he would have him find her. A risky gamble, one that paid off, it took a lot to outmaneuver her, and Fury knew that. Why else would he have told her that Steve spent his down time in the building in the observation deck rather than in the lobby? Being out maneuvered stung a little, but she admired how well he put it together. Opposed to letting him win completely, she got Steve to sign on as her Head of Security.
Before England adopted her, Amelia lived outside of politicking and subterfuge. Onhula ensure she stayed ignorant to it all; Amelia appreciated efforts, but they had been all for nothing. From the moment he took her in, England taught her politics, and how to maneuver, to a point anyway; she had long since surpassed him in skill.
Part of that training involved reading people and how to manipulate them with that insight. It worked with Colonel Phillips, Peggy Carter, Howard Stark, Nick Fury and even Natasha Romanov. She understood them, how they thought, their hopes and desires, and she could wield it against them. Yet, she struggled to predict Steve Rogers. Sure, she grasped how his mind worked, and his solid sense of patriotism should mean she could manipulate him.
She couldn't. For as long as she had known him, she had struggled and failed to. Maybe it wasn't that she couldn't, but that she wouldn't. Something about him rendered her unable to control him. At first, back in 1943, she hated it. Over time, after speaking to him on several occasions and developing a friendship, she preferred it that way. It was refreshing really. For the first time since Onhula passed away, she had someone in her life impervious to her calculations other than Matthew and Scotland. Just like Onhula, she had the skill to make him dance to her tune, but something intangible held her back. She liked it; it felt like she could actually trust him.
Amelia did the leg work to have him as her Head of Security; America could care less.
Despite her trust in Natasha, she felt no qualms about manipulating her. Sure, the ex-Russian hated it when she managed it early on, but she understood why. From the moment Natasha accepted Clint's offer for a different life, she realized it meant acknowledging that Amelia would manipulate her sometimes. She appreciated why too, and Amelia always conceded when Natasha confronted her. That understanding formed the foundation of her friendship with Natasha. Besides, trying to manipulate her had morphed into something of a game that both of them willingly played, and enjoyed. Occasionally, neither tried influencing the other, they would drop their guard and pretend to be normal friends for a few hours. Both of them needed it. It kept them sane. Assassin and Nation shared a mutual respect that confused everyone else.
A similar relationship would never work with Steve. For all she wished otherwise, if she admitted everything she had done, it would shatter his heart and any trust he had in her. With him around, she could explore the girl she was, to try find that sense of peace and lift her burden for a little while.
He needed her to adjust to the 21st century. She needed him to remember who she aspired to be once. Perhaps, with luck she might have the chance.
For a moment, she forgot the pain caused by reaching for the past, and the life it cost.
Only one Nation ever worked out her charade. Matthew was her twin, and she told him more than anyone; Scotland had helped create the character of 'Alfred;' Onhula taught her how to play the role, and Uncle Inuit often helped her keep it together.
Germany.
He had called her after the Chitari Invasion and Battle of New York. "Amelia, vhen vere you going to tell us that Captain America vas alive?"
"Since when do I have to tell you anything?" She had snapped back, the façade had slipped. After the battering she took during the battle just thirty minutes ago, she wanted to curl up in her bed and sleep the day away. Normally, she would have quipped something like 'right dude, sorry I forgot.'
Logically, since they spent so much time together after the war, he spotted the slip. Rather than call her out, he had sighed, "Vell, don't blame me vhen the others attack you for it at the next conference."
No need to say thank you, anything would have ruined their rare moment of perfect understanding. He understood her charade and the act she kept up, likely also how it wore her down. Though, not all of it was an act. Some was genuine, a scarce moment when her guard dropped enough for the girl to shine through. Sometimes nothing about her was real; Germany accepted that, and from his tone that day, he realized it years ago, but respected her enough to keep silent. A hundred other Nations, some her own family, would never have granted her that courtesy.
Only one other ever offered her than, and despite everything they had gone through, kept it to himself during the worst moments between them. That was why she fell in love with Kiku. Fortunately, she didn't have to manipulate him, but she would if necessary.
Rarely, she regretted the choices that underpinned her role.
Despite everything, she loved her life and enjoyed every minute of it. The dance on a wire suspended hundreds of feet above the ground exhilarated her. Undoubtedly she would get through the problems, survive her tests, and wave with a cheeky grin at the others.
In the end, that was her, the woman made of glass, but with the durability of vibranium. Everyone else could fuck off.
A/N: I thought it was important to delve into Amelia's perspective on events and to flush out her personality. This also might put events in 'Pardon Me' into perspective. Reviews are loved and cherished.
