To Bash a Warrior Cat
The 'C' warrior
Hello everybody! Today, the victim shall be a cat from ThunderClan! Ladies and gentlemen, please give a warm welcome for ThunderClan's very own Cloudtail!
yamimaniacyamimaniac
Scenario: Cloudtail is on his way to visit Princess
As our fluffy white hero of this chapter was making his way to his mother's fence, he smelled intruders of ThunderClan territory. So Cloudtail had to be his typical rash self and nose around the bushes to see who was sitting there.
"Hi there! What's your name?" a friendly voice meowed. Cloudtail spun around and his jaw dropped to the ground. Sitting there was a small she-cat that looked like Firestar, only younger, female and more...gold.
"Are ya deaf or something? I asked you a question. Now answer me. Rabbit or kangaroo?"
"What?"
"Oh, never mind. That was for the people from 6 Patience 2006 who are nodding and laughing at this. Now, you're..?"
"Um, I'm Cloudtail."
"There is a very pretty smoke Egyptian Mau down the road… Did you say something?"
"I answered your question."
"If you said Rabbit, you win one million dollars."
"Huh?"
"Your name is Cloudtail. Now if you know anyone who looks like me, find him."
"You know Firestar?"
"Fetch him for me please. Thank you." The she-cat sat with her tail curled round her paws. "I won't move an inch."
Cloudtail recovered from slight shock and ran back to camp. He tripped over exactly fourteen mouses/meeces/mice/mices. smug grinI should know, I counted.
yamimaniacyamimaniac
And thus, Cloudtail stumbled into the ThunderClan camp like he'd seen a ShadowClan kit bouncing on its head on ThunderClan territory. Which, as we all know, will never happen. Ever. In eternity.
So naturally, the deputy asks the leader's nephew why he stumbled into the ThunderClan camp like he'd seen a ShadowClan kit bouncing on its head on ThunderClan territory. Which, as we all know, will never happen. Ever. In eternity.
Muahaha, no, that was NOT a typo error.
When the deputy finds out, he too looks like he'd seen a ShadowClan kit bouncing on its head on ThunderClan territory. Which, as we all know, will never happen. Ever. In eternity.
So they go tell Firestar, who, unlike his deputy and nephew, does NOT look like he'd seen a ShadowClan kit bouncing on its head on ThunderClan territory. Which, as we all know, will never happen. Ever. In eternity.
In fact, what the brilliant leader said was: "Oh, that's all right. Why are you two looking like you've seen a ShadowClan kit bouncing on its head on ThunderClan territory. Which, as we all know, will never happen. Ever. In eternity."
Both deputy and nephew fainted. And they had to be dragged off to the medicine cat's den looking like they'd seen a ShadowClan kit bouncing on its head on ThunderClan territory. Which, as we all know, will never happen. Ever. In eternity.
I believe you are all sick of hearing/reading the phrase "like he'd seen a ShadowClan kit bouncing on its head on ThunderClan territory. Which, as we all know, will never happen. Ever. In eternity."
Good news, you won't see it again in this chapter.
Bad news, I've been known as a lair.
So just to prove it, you can read it again. Unless, of course, I'm just flattering myself thinking there's anybody reading this. Look out for it.
On a more serious note…the fic shall go on.
yamimaniacyamimaniac
"So, they have come," Firestar mused. "I wonder what they have in store for the Clans."
"Hopefully, not all of us will end up looking like we've seen another Clan's kit bouncing on its head on our Clan's territory. Which, as we all know, will never happen. Ever. In eternity."
yamimaniacyamimaniac
YM: The blue-purple button is waiting…for you
I sound freaky
