Chapter 4
The Heartbreaking Truth
"Mist…don't go…"
Misty stood still as her heart skipped a beat, her right hand shaking as it still hung over the power button of the video phone.
'Mist', he called her…He had never called her that before in her life, even while they were traveling together. Almost every nickname most people created for her – especially those that her sisters made up – were extremely agitating for her to hear, yet this new nickname given to her by Ash was somehow…soothing.
Then, the raven-haired trainer raised his eyes to meet hers once more, his voice sinking down to a doleful whisper as he spoke.
"I wanted to say to you that…I'm sorry."
"Sorry? What do you mean?" she replied, calmly sitting down again in her chair.
"I never called you – not even once while I was traveling in Hoenn or Sinnoh. I can't believe how selfish I was during my journeys – to place all my attention upon the next Gym Leader I would be facing in the next town, and not even take a moment to talk to a friend who means more to me than any badge or title. Even while I would be sitting around doing nothing in a Pokémon Center."
'Am I…that important to him?' she thought. 'Does he really feel about me that way?'
"Ash, don't worry! You were busy with your adventures, I understand that!"
She tried her hardest to restore the smile to her friend's lips and convince him that he shouldn't blame himself for his actions, but to no avail. If there was one thing about Ash that Misty remembered about him besides his appetite or his love for his Pokémon, it was his stubborn attitude. He would normally argue on and on with her about even the littlest of things , until Brock intervened or Pikachu decided to snap them out of it with a Thundershock. But if there was one emotion in him which was simply impossible to suppress, it was the guilt he suffered whenever he believed that he was letting his friends or loved ones down: the very guilt which he was experiencing now as he continued to blame himself for his actions.
"No," he uttered, his hand landing hard onto the table in front of him. "That's still no excuse for what I did. You're my best friend, and no-one could ever replace you in my life. You even went as far as to save me from certain death twice, but I never even repaid you in any way. You'd think that the least I could do is call every now and then to see how you're doing, but I couldn't even do something as goddamn simple as that."
Misty stared intently at Ash's face, as he tried his best to remain composed whilst speaking tearfully.
"I remember years ago, when I heard about your battle with those arrogant pigs who called themselves the 'Invincible Pokémon Brothers'. Those bastards had even gone as far as to hurt you with their Tentacruels' poison sting just so they could 'win' the battle. When the news came to me, I felt like I was dying inside."
Tears were now rolling down onto his sleeves, as he clenched his fist in frustration. Misty placed her hand over her heart, remembering the aching pain she had experienced as her body was barraged by the relentless waves of poison sting attacks from the Tentacruel. But the greatest pain she felt at that time was not due to the venomous attacks, but something completely different.
It was the pain created by her love and longing for Ash, who was no longer by her side. As their friendship grew during their time together on their journeys, he would always be there to protect her, even if it meant putting his own body and life on the line, selflessly looking out for her during any danger. She wanted to be safe in his arms again; for him to embrace her and whisper into her ear that everything was going to be alright. But the harsh truth of reality broke her heart, as she realised that he wasn't there for her. She continued to suffer excruciating pain until Gyarados broke out of his cage in anger, sending the brothers and their Tentacruels rocketing into the sky.
'He really does care about me that way...Does this mean that…I can finally tell him what I've wanted to, all these years?'
Her mind became conflicted, and her heart began to race. Seeing Ash speak to her from his very heart and soul was something that she had never seen him do before.
" I should've been there to protect you. I know I should have. And even after I heard about your battle from Professor Oak while I was in the Hoenn region, I still didn't call you in the end, no matter how much I reminded myself to. It was one thing to not have been there for you when you needed me; to not have even called you at all to make sure that you were alright…I'll never forgive myself for that…"
"Ash, please, stop blaming yourself! I know your friends are the most important thing in the world to you, but you've gotta realise that you can't always be there to protect them at all times! Sometimes you have to let them do things alone and in their own way, because that's the only way they'll truly learn from their own mistakes, both as trainers and people. Even if it means that they can get hurt trying to. Besides, you had your own dreams that you were setting out to fulfil. I didn't want to get in the way of that."
Misty cried, covering her eyes with her hands, not being able to bear seeing her friend in such mental anguish. Her tears temporarily stopped, however, as she heard rustling sounds, her attention diverted to Ash's hand which reached into his jacket. As it left his inner pocket, the pink handkerchief that she had given to him many years ago, along with her special lure were revealed to her.
"I remember when you gave these to me…" he said, reflectively looking at them.
"My handkerchief and lure! …you still have them?" she asked.
"Of course I do. I kept them on me at all times, so I could remember you every time I looked at them. The only time I could ever take them out was at night, while Brock and Dawn were asleep, but that's all the time I ever needed. These were all that I had left to remind me of you. I missed you every day, Misty…"
"You…you really mean that, don't you? …you really did miss me?" she gasped softly, smiling as she kept back her tears.
He nodded. "Of course, Mist. I still do."
As she looked into his eyes, Misty could feel her tears receding slightly. But still, there was one question that lingered in her mind, as she couldn't help posing it to him.
"But why, Ash? I mean, we've only been apart for a few years! Why did you think of me so much as you do?"
"Because I…"
Misty could feel her heart pounding harder and harder,\ as a drop of sweat trickled down her brow. This was it. The time when Ash Ketchum's true feelings for her would be revealed. All her hopes and fears were left clinging onto this very moment as she prayed that he would say those three magical words which would put all her doubts to rest: the three words which would finally allow her to express her own true feelings to the one and only trainer whom she had ever loved.
Ash exhaled deeply, turning his head slightly to the side, speaking to her words which broke her heart in two.
"…because you're my best friend..."
A tiny breath of disappointment escaped Misty's mouth, and her head drooped with sadness. She wanted him to say that he loved her, to say that he missed her everyday because she meant the world to him…Now, her dreams of love were shattered by the single person to whom her heart could ever belong.
Week after week, day after day following her separation from Ash and Brock, Misty would reject date requests from enthusiastic male trainers who would show more interest in her than her gym badge. No matter how handsome she thought they were, or how promising and powerful they seemed as trainers, she would reject their offers every time, all because of her love for him.
But now, Misty could see that things were different. He didn't have the same feelings for her, as she did for him. She had lived for more than six years with hope, that one day he would return her love with his own heart – a hope which now turned out to be nothing more than a false shadow of despair.
Her whole body started to shiver. She felt engulfed in a sudden coldness she had never felt before in her life, as she finally came to realise the painful truth.
All those years of longing for him…all those years of waiting for him…
Wasted.
"Mist…" said the boy inside the computer screen, "…are you alright?"
'Stop crying, Misty,' she thought to herself. 'Don't let him see you like this. After all, he's only telling the truth by saying that you are his best friend. No matter how sad or frustrated you may feel right now, it's not right to take it out on him…'
Misty did her best to disguise her sorrows by forcing herself to smile, although it killed her inside to do so.
"Thank you Ash, that's so sweet of you…"
'I can't take this anymore,' she thought. 'I don't want to feel hurt any longer. No more.'
As she continued to stare at the two chocolate-brown eyes that looked at her with a concerned gaze, she finally decided that she had enough. Then, without hesitation or a second thought, she did something that she never thought she could do in her life.
She lied to him.
"Well, I have to go now…Daisy needs me downstairs, I think." she said, trying to sound as convincing as possible.
"Oh…ok, then. Well, goodnight then, Misty. Sleep well."
Ash gave her one last worried look, as both trainers reached out their arms towards the power buttons of their video phones.
"Goodnight, Ash."
After Misty switched off her video phone, a single teardrop fell from her right eye, landing heavily on the keyboard below.
"…sweet dreams."
Then, hanging up the phone on the side of the monitor screen, Misty finally burst into tears as she turned around and flung herself onto her bed, sobbing uncontrollably into her pillow. The full moon shone dimly into her room, illuminating a small drawer next to her bed. Placed upon it was a framed picture of a smiling, black-haired trainer who had just broken her heart…
(End of Chapter 4)
