*A Lost In Translation prompt for xandrota! Don't forget to hit me up with your own ideas, either by PM or review and I will stick them up here. I'm tempted to make the next one before they marry but if anyone has any other suggestions, feel free to let me know. I'd do a honeymoon one but that'll be at least a month long TARDIS travel so I'd need more specific suggestions tbh... The Potter Doctor*
Clara couldn't believe that after everything they'd been through together, the TARDIS still found new ways to screw with her head. She stormed through the corridors of the school until she found the Doctor's classroom and rapped angrily on the door. He gestured her to come in and she did. He was in the middle of an experiment and a giant green bubble filled the room. Clara felt her anger dissipate and she was fascinated by the bubble and went to poke it.
"Clara no!" the Doctor yelled but it was too late and the bubble popped, showering Clara in green gunk from head to toe. She glared at the Doctor, who was wincing as the class burst into raucous laughter. She grabbed the Doctor by the bow tie and dragged him out of the room, wiping green from her face and arms onto his jacket.
"Your fucking TARDIS!" she snapped. "All the children in my class have speaking German for the last two hours. I can't speak German. Why is she translating their voices?"
The Doctor pulled a face and Clara glared at him furiously. He opened his mouth and then shut it again. She was still staring, still glaring. She was going to kill him. Ban him from sex for a month or worse, TARDIS travel for a month. She twisted her wedding ring on her finger, something she realised that she did when she was upset. They'd been married for two years and he still never failed to annoy her.
"I've been meaning to tell you…" the Doctor said and Clara poked his chest warningly. "First of all, green isn't your colour." Clara's eyes were on fire and he was scared. He should be. She shook her head furiously spraying him with green. She'd already had one day of green hair, she wasn't sure she could cope with another. "I was fiddling…"
"Fiddling?" Clara's voice had taken a worryingly violent tone and she was really starting to consider punching the Doctor. "Fiddling. How?" she punctuated each word and he bit his lip. "Fiddling with the translation matrix?"
"No!" he insisted. "But while I was working, I may have inadvertently broke the translation matrix. I haven't worked out how to fix it yet. I will, I promise. But the children are very distracting. I didn't think about it being a problem, I thought the children in this country spoke English."
"So go to the TARDIS," Clara snapped. "Go into the time vortex and work it out. Now. Wait, what do you mean you thought the children spoke English? You're telling me that the TARDIS isn't translating at all?"
"That's exactly what I'm saying," the Doctor replied, nodding. "The children really are speaking German. Must be a collective prank of some kind. I think you need a shower. Let's go home, we can be back ten minutes ago if we take the TARDIS."
Clara agreed and they slipped out of school so she could shower and it gave Clara a chance to think of an adequate punishment for the children. She had an evil idea. She suggested it to the Doctor and he agreed. The TARDIS materialised in a school cupboard near their classrooms and they went their separate ways, arriving back moments after they left. Clara stormed into her classroom and all the children started animatedly chatting in German. Clara opened her mouth and spoke in German, courtesy of the repaired TARDIS translation matrix. She had spent her time on the TARDIS having her memories filtered, so she could remember everything that they had said that morning and had it translated.
"You know I speak German right?" The entire class's faces fell in unison. "Very clever, very good prank. Consider me suitably impressed. Seeing as how you're all so fond of German, I want you all to write me a 5000 word essay on your favourite German book over the weekend. If any of your parents feel that is unfair, I'd love to tell them what you were up to and some of the very embarrassing secrets you revealed this morning when you thought I couldn't understand you. So, are we all clear?"
There was a chorus of "Yes Mrs Oswald."
Mrs Oswald. She smiled at that. Her husband might just get a trip in the TARDIS that night after all…
