Chapter 4.

When Hephaestion got back to his chamber, he realized that Alexander's rejection to kiss him had hurt him more than he had thought it were possible. Everyone had let him know subtlety that Alexander was a really passionate man, with a healthy sex life but which, according to Ptolemy, had been in stand-by for the last year. Now Hephaestion could piece all those tiny bits of information together that some companions had told him informally or just because.

While remembering their conversation, it dawned on him that Alexander had neither denied his feelings at all nor crushed the future possibility of being a couple again; what the prince was opposed to was to rush him back into a relationship the brunette could not remember.

Hephaestion could in that moment understand Alexander's attitude and that gesture of respect made Hephaestion want to try harder to remember and recover the love they had shared.

The brunette, lying on his bed, started to plan what he would do to gain the prince back and he realized that his heartbeat speeded up a bit at the simple thought of the blonde prince and a prospective intimacy.

He decided to follow his heart that he was sure, knew better than his mind. Hephaestion knew that such a big love could not be totally lost; he had just to unbury it and give it a dose of fresh air to keep it alive; he only wished Alexander had enough patience to wait for him.


The following morning Hephaestion made his way towards the dining room and instead of sitting on the other end of the long table; he chose to sit opposite Alexander. The blonde prince was surprised due to the bold move and when he dared to look at the young man, Hephaestion bestowed a small smile upon him, the smile he used to share with the prince when they were both alone.

They talked and shared their morning meal animadetely due to the plans of King Philip to invade Persia. Hephaestion did not take part in the conversation and Alexander saw the change of mood reflected on his beloved Phai.

"Is there anything annoying you, Hephaestion?" he asked politely because he could no longer avoid seeing that sad face.

"No" he answered plainly.

"Are you sure?" Alexander insisted.

"You will go to war while I stay here, with the old men, women and children" Hephaestion protested and Alexander could have sworn that the twenty-year-old brunette had also pouted.

"Will you stay behind?" Alexander asked surprised.

"Your father doesn't allow me to go. He said that my leg is not strong enough and that I am slower than the rest of you; he also added that I can be a liability in the battlefield" Hephaestion explained and felt embarrassed.

"But we are leaving in two months, may be you will be able to join us by that time" Alexander said, trying to encourage his friend.

"I don't know, I'm training hard. I am also doing some exercises to make my leg stronger" Hephaestion said and Alexander realized how much the brunette wanted to go with them.

"I'm sure you will succeed" Alexander said and was gifted with a tiny smile on Hephaestion's face.

Breakfast was over and the companions headed towards the training grounds. They would be wrestling so, after some warming-up, the young men took off their clothes and remained in their loincloths. Alexander tried not to look in Hephaestion's direction, but his mismatched eyes betrayed him and he felt warmth travelling along his body and pooling in his nether region. His Phai, he still thought about him as his, was so handsome and manly and the young prince could clearly remember how that sun-kissed skin felt under his fingers; how those milky thighs used to welcome and dominate him or how his arms used to bring their naked bodies together. He also remembered how their bodies used to fuse together until they felt like one and how they could spend hours joined and feasting on each other's body.

The young blonde, who had not lain with anyone since Hephaestion's accident, felt his manhood coming back to life and he had to make a big effort to make it go away. Images of nasty things did the trick quickly but just a single look towards Hephaestion betrayed him again.

Cleitus was supervising them that morning and he was the one who matched the different companions. Hephaestion was left alone and Alexander could see how the brunette was fuming.

"Don't get mad, pretty boy; you will be wrestling with me" Cleitus said and Alexander felt a stab of jealousy when he saw the mischievous expression on the black warrior's face.

"Why?" the brunette asked plainly.

"Because I want to test your strength and your companions may forget about your leg in the heat of the wrestling" Cleitus explained as plainly as he had been asked.

"But I don't want you to treat me as if I were a pitiful weak man" Hephaestion warned him.

"You are not weak, you just need more improvement. Less words and more actions; come here and engage" Cleitus said while clapping his hands loudly.

Thirty seconds later, Hephaestion was lying on his stomach with one of his arms on his back and Cleitus keeping him down. When the time limit was over, the taller man let him stand and explained him what his mistakes were and what he had to do to improve faster.


From that day on, Hephaestion practiced everyday extra time with Cleitus and Alexander saw, with despair, how his brunette was creating a strong bond with the brave warrior and he was afraid that Cleitus could ask Hephaestion to be his eromenos, as he was already training him in the art of war.

But Hephaestion did not have any intention to pursue any kind of relationship with Cleitus, but he was not opposed to have one with the blonde prince, in fact, he was having some kind of flashbacks but he was not sure if they were real ones or if it was just his strong desire and vivid imagination. Due to those images, he decided to act.

That evening, during their meal, Hephaestion sat opposite Alexander again as he had been doing lately and he was attentive to everything Alexander said, making the prince feel a bit nervous.

Alexander was looking at the tray with apples, deciding which one to pick.

"Take this one, it is the reddest" Hephaestion said offering the fruit and his fingers brushed Alexander's lingering longer in his touch.

"Thank you" Alexander said, stuttering, Hephaestion's touch had taken him by surprise and sent a shiver along his arm.

The young prince had to close his eyes, he did not want Hephaestion to see desire in his eyes but it was useless; Hephaestion had seen it and bestowed a smile on him and Alexander could not help it and smiled back.

The training was hard, Hephaestion was getting better very quickly and Cleitus was a very strict instructor, and even though the black General had made some passes on the brunette, Hephaestion had not responded to any of them, only having eyes for the prince. Alexander was not blind; he had seen Hephaestion's intents to get closer and, even though he enjoyed and wanted them, he did not want to raise his expectations at all for a while and then see them crash when the brunette stopped doing that because he was afraid.

Cleitus had tired out the blue-eyed youth and after checking on him, he had left him with his face against the ground, completely sprawled and trying to catch his breath.

Alexander, who was coming from the stable, saw his brunette lying on the floor and he felt his heart in pieces. Without thinking it twice, he ran towards the fallen man. He knelt by his side and grabbing one of his arms, he turned the slim body over and towards him. Hephaestion immediately opened his eyes and due to the sudden movement, he found himself with his face very close to Alexander's, feeling his warm breath on his skin. He closed his eyes and leaned forwards to catch Alexander's lips in a kiss but he found only air; Alexander had lifted his head and was looking at him with pain in his eyes.

"Why not?" Hephaestion asked in spite of feeling embarrassed.

"Because I'm still not sure" the blonde replied.

"About you or me?" Hephaestion tried again.

"About you … sorry but I am not an experiment" Alexander said sadly.

"Who said you were?" Hephaestion asked again, with his head still resting onto Alexander's lap.

"Just think for a second, how I would feel if after our kiss you decided that you really didn't like it" Alexander said plainly, letting the brunette see his inner and deepest fear.

"I'm sorry, I haven't thought about that" he said and sat up and then stood up, dusting his chiton.

He offered his hand and helped Alexander to stand on his feet and bowing his head slightly, he went away. After that, Alexander felt awful and he decided that he would give Hephaestion a chance in spite of risking his own heart by doing that.

However, Hephaestion was truly afraid of making a move so he stayed away, not physically but emotionally. He still sat next to Alexander and spoke to him gently but there was an absence of contact that made Alexander feel even guiltier and he really did not know what to do anymore. He finally decided to wait and if he saw that the brunette was still eager but dubious, he would encourage him to make the first move.

Hephaestion only dared to throw glances at the blonde prince when he thought that Alexander was not looking. What Hephaestion did not obviously remember was that Alexander already knew all his tricks and that they had lived that all before, trying to get closer but not so obviously; feeling eager to touch and taste, feeling complete when they were together …

Alexander caught Hephaestion's looks and saw appreciation and care; it was not love … not yet, not as the one they used to share but he was now sure that they could get there again; a love as strong and deep as theirs could not simply vanish.


The opportunity appeared that same day when the prince was at the baths and he saw how his naughty Peritas escaped with the prince's towel between his teeth. The yellow Molossian had been stealing his towels since he was just a little puppy and even though Alexander had punished him whenever he did that, the big dog was too stubborn and had never learnt that lesson.

Hephaestion was walking by when he saw Peritas running with the towel and, without knowing how, he caught the dog who started to bark and jump around him and it didn't stop until Hephaestion petted him for some minutes, scratching the big and fat belly. He also managed to get the towel from the distracted dog and the robber was cheeky enough to guide Hephaestion towards his master who was calling the dog's name.

When Alexander saw Hephaestion holding his towel, he stopped shouting while Peritas hid behind Hephaestion when he sensed the prince's angry mood.

"Why were you shouting, my prince?" Hephaestion asked boldly.

"That big ball of fur stole my towel and I cannot get out of here. If I stay longer, my skin will look like a prune" Alexander said and his look was a mixture of anger and laughter.

"I caught him on his way to the doghouse" Hephaestion said approaching the young man who was still inside the water.

"May I have it back, please?" Alexander asked.

"I don't know" Hephaestion joked and leaned over to hand it out when Peritas jumped on his back and pushed him into the water, directly into Alexander's arms.

Alexander caught him and pressed him to his wet and strong body. When Hephaestion recovered from the sudden fall into the water, he lifted his blue eyes and, looking into Alexander's mismatched ones, leaned forward and their lips finally met in a sweet but short kiss.

When the kiss was over, Hephaestion sighed and rested his head onto Alexander's shoulder while his arms snaked tighter around Alexander's strong waist. After a while, Hephaestion retreated just a bit and whispered:

"I liked our kiss"

"I liked it too" Alexander whispered back.

"Can I kiss you again?" Hephaestion asked, a bit nervous.

"Are you sure that that is what you want?" Alexander asked again.

"Yes I am. May I?" Hephaestion asked and he was about to lose his patience.

Alexander nodded and thirty seconds later, their lips were touching for the second time in over a year. Hephaestion pecked the prince's lips from one corner to the other of the prince's mouth and then spontaneously nibbled the bottom lip until Alexander granted him entrance. Hephaestion shyly let his tongue enter Alexander's mouth and travelled around every spot he could find so he could boost his memory of that wet hot cavern.

Alexander put an end to that kiss before it got more heated than it already was; he really wanted to take his brunette to a more private and not so wet place.

Hephaestion looked at him and was about to ask him why they had stopped when Alexander pecked his lips tenderly and said:

"We'd better get out of here or we will catch a cold" and after saying that he grabbed Hephaestion's hand in his and helped him out of the bath area.

They both laughed at each other when they realized how drenched they were. Hephaestion rinsed the excess of water from his clothes and Alexander wrapped his strong body in the recovered towel and blushed when he saw keen and open desire in the blue-sky eyes.

TBC