Updated: 07/10/2015

Finnick

It's been harder not to look at her for these past few days.

I'm not in love, don't worry - even though there'd be no one to be worried anyway. It's just... she's fucking it all up.

Snoz is a twisted son of a bitch, and she doesn't need that. Now I hear them talk about how high they all were during his latest "parties". She is part of that group now.

He is not good for her. Not good at all. I doubt there'd be anyone worse for her - but again I'm not one to talk.

I hate her for doing this. Taking the easiest decision. I have had that temptation to go and just smoke, drink and forget about all the bad things. I often have this need, still now. But I try not to give up to it.

She was supposed to be the strong one ! I hate her because she's been weak ! I HATE HER ! And I know it's not fair but shit HOW DARE SHE ?! Now what am I supposed to do ? It can't be my turn to be the strong one, because I AM NOT FUCKING STRONG ! STOP SAYING THAT ! SHUT THE FUCK UP, I HATE YOU ALL ! STOP BEING IMPRESSED; OPEN YOUR FUCKING EYES AND SEE ME ! SEE HOW BROKEN I AM ! I AM NOT STRONG !

CAN'T ANYONE SEE ANY-FUCKING-THING ?! I AM DEAD INSIDE ! I AM TIRED OF PRETENDING ! FUCKING HELL I CAN'T WAIT ANYMORE ! PLEASE TAKE AWAY THE PAIN ! PLEA-