Hi again! Hope you enjoy this chapter, it took a lot of time to write :)
THIEF
Chapter four—Diners and Interrogations
This is stupid. I decided as we entered The Old Hylian Mill, which was a locally owned diner that served breakfast all day. This is so, so stupid and dumb and stupid.
Had I been a smart girl, I would've rejected Link's offer for breakfast then hid in the school bathroom until lunch. That's what I should've done. Not follow him to a nearly-empty diner on the edge of town like some dazzled, hormone-crazed moron. And I certainly shouldn't have let him lead me to the vinyl booth in the back of the restaurant—which, by the way, was farthest from the rest of customers. I didn't even look good today, since I'd simply grabbed the first things in my drawer without really thinking about it. I was wearing mismatched clothes; a pair of purple sweat pants I usually reserved for home-use only, and a green t-shirt bearing the words 2 cool 4 U! The irony of the shirt was impeccable, considering that I felt anything but cool at the moment.
It didn't help that Link was looking deliciously rough today in faded jeans and worn black t-shirt that looked sinfully soft to the touch…
I quickly tore my gaze from the collar of his shirt, blushing like mad as the waitress approached with some menus. When she was gone, I opened mine and stared at it as if it contained the meaning of life.
I only ended up ordering orange juice, since I didn't want to make the bill too high. My stomach gurgled in protest, but I didn't need to be in anyone's debt.
Once we ordered and waitress had moved on, taking away the object I'd been giving my undivided attention to with her, I started staring at the table. I wouldn't allow myself to become another conquest, no matter how soft his shirt looked or how kissable those lips seemed. No matter how good either of those things would feel.
Back up! My thoughts were taking a dangerous curve.
"Princess," A voice said, snapping me from my daze.
I blinked once, twice, bracing myself, and then met Link's cobalt gaze. "Yeah?"
He leaned forward, cocking his head at me intently. "Why didn't you order anything?"
"I… I did." I said defensively.
"Let's rephrase that, shall we?" He licked his lips and cocked a brow at me. "Why didn't you order anything solid?"
"I'm not hungry." I mumbled. Not sooner the words left my mouth, my stupid traitor stomach started to growl.
"You're lying." It wasn't a question.
I didn't say anything and started ripping my napkin into long shreds.
"Princess." The flirtation and teasing light to his voice had evaporated, sounding somber and frustrated now.
I looked up, startled by the change of mood. "What?" I asked.
Link's tawny brow knit together, and he shook his head. "You…" He leaned back in his vinyl seat, a wry smile on his face. "You confuse me."
I raised a brow at him. "I confuse you?"
He nodded. "Yes, you really do."
"Why?" I inquired, cocking my head to the side.
He gestured to me. "You're so… stubborn."
I scowled and crossed my arms. "Am not!"
"You won't let me help you," Link pointed out. "Even if it's something as simple as buying you breakfast."
"I don't need your hospitality." I muttered as I tore the shreds of the napkin into white confetti. "I was fine."
Link sighed, annoyed with me. "No you weren't. You looked about ready to pass out in the hallway."
I snorted, and his easy smile returned.
"I did not." I scoffed.
"Alright, so maybe I exaggerated a bit." He pointed at me. "But my point still stands; you're ungodly stubborn."
"So what?" I said, pushing the remains of my napkin around on my placemat with my fork. "Like you're Mr. Perfect."
He opened his mouth to say something, but I kept on talking.
"You're a cocky, overconfident troublemaker." I continued. "And you're far too aware of your own hotness."
Link grinned and leaned forward onto the table again. "So I'm hot, am I?"
I flushed, mentally telling myself to shut up. However, my mouth seemed to be moving without my consent. "What? Do you really think everyone gets their way so easily? It's a nice thought, but no. Only the pretty people do."
"Really?" He asked, clearly intrigued.
I sighed. Of course he wouldn't know how the other half lives; he was probably born adorably cute, and then grew into unduly handsome—likely skipping the awkward years altogether. "Uh-huh." I murmured, indolently nibbling on my unused fork.
"See?" Link pointed to my fork. "You are hungry."
Realizing what I was doing, I threw the fork back onto the table. "Shut up." I muttered grumpily.
He crossed his arms across his broad chest and smiled crookedly, and I couldn't help but admire what the pose did for his chest and arms—that being great things.
Almost out of nowhere, the waitress appeared, placing down my juice in front of me and Link's food in front of him. She smiled—a little too warmly, if you ask me—and left us to ourselves.
Almost immediately after we were alone again, he picked up his fork and knife and started cutting the waffles into neat squares. I watched in curiosity, ignoring my stomach's cries for food. I'd never seen a guy eat like that; most of them just wanted to shovel it in as quickly as possible. Once the cutting was done, he stabbed a piece of waffle and thrust it toward me, precariously dangling it right in front of my nose.
"Um, that's a lovely piece of waffle?" I said, leaning away from it. The damn thing was making my mouth water.
"Eat." Link commanded, holding my gaze. "We're not leaving until you do."
I blinked at him. "What? No! I told you, I'm fine."
"Eat, Princess." He repeated, still holding the fork out for me.
I flicked my eyes between his face, and the very appetizing piece of waffle, biting my lip. "I… I don't want it."
"Yes, you do." It was statement.
"Link!" I exclaimed, tightening my grip on my juice.
"Yes?"
"Stop it."
"Hmm… no, I don't think I'll do that, bit-sized Harkinian."
I scowled again. Damn, that waffle was starting to look almost as delectable as the person offering it.
"Oh fine!" I finally caved, biting down on the fork. I chewed and swallowed, barely tasting it. Then I stuck out my tongue. "All gone, see?"
Link nodded, pulling back his fork. "Yeah, I see." He skewered another piece, and held it out for me again.
I raised an eyebrow. "You're going to make me eat the whole thing, aren't you?"
He grinned.
I groaned. "Well then, at the very least let me feed myself!" I snapped, snagging the fork from him. "Seriously, we looked like one of those annoying couples who can't keep the PDA to a minimum." I plopped the piece into my mouth.
I reached across the table to snag another piece.
Link pushed the plate toward me, and rested his elbows on the table. "You think we look like a couple?"
"Well, being alone and all… and with you feeding me…" I shrugged, my cheeks tinting pink.
He only cocked his head to the side and smiled, the action making my stomach flutter a little. I shoveled another piece of waffle into my mouth to get my mind of off the boy sitting in front of me.
We sat in silence for a moment, the only sounds I could pick up were the conversations of the minimal other customers and waiters.
"You're interesting Harkinian, you know that?" Link suddenly said.
I frowned. "How so?"
He frowned as well, but in thought. "I don't know. It's just… how you act and how you carry yourself. You're… different than most girls."
I snorted again. "So I'm a freak?"
Link shook his head, smiling. "Not a freak. Special, I'd say."
I tossed another piece into my mouth before replying. "How am I special?"
He shrugged. "I just don't really know what to make of you sometimes."
"Enlighten me." I said.
"You don't put up with anyone's shit," Link explained bluntly. "Not mine, not authority's. Nobody's."
I flushed, remembering what had happened in class. "That's because I was grumpy." I mumbled feebly.
"What about that day in the hall?" He asked, resting his chiselled face on his knuckles. "You didn't hesitate to give me a piece of your mind."
I remembered how I'd threatened him with Midna's 'magic', smiling fondly. "So, what? Are you a sadomasochist or something?" I asked. "Is that why you've been bugging me lately? So I can threaten you some more?"
He chuckled, shaking his head. "No, nothing like that. You just interested me."
I took a sip of my orange juice. "I'm not that interesting." I admitted.
"Oh contraire, I find you very intriguing." He said a matter-of-factly. "For instance, you care a lot about school, right?"
I nodded, nibbling along the edge of the waffle.
"Then why do you miss so much of it?"
I froze. He was right. That is odd. Flustered, I put my fork back onto the placemat. "I could ask you the same question." I said.
Link nodded. "You could, but I would have a legitimate answer."
I cocked my brow at him. "Which would be…?"
"I don't care about school."
I snorted. "Yeah. Real legit."
He grinned boyishly, running a careless hand through his impeccably messy hair. "Okay, maybe not legitimate, but at least it makes some sense."
I shrugged, hoping he'd just drop the subject.
"And your reason would be?"
Grr…
"My guardian is just really protective," I lied, poking my waffles. "If I have, like, a runny nose or something she insists on staying home." I shrugged, shovelling the last few pieces of waffle into my mouth. I probably looked like a huge pig, but what did I care how I looked in front of Link Mc-freaking-Cormick? If I was lucky, maybe doing so will disgust him so much that he'll go take his infinite hotness, and his tingles, and stop pursuing me.
Link only smiled though—despite my far-from ladylike display—his focus on my now-empty plate. "Now, I hate to say I told you so but," He leaned forward on the smooth table, moving dangerously close to me. "I told you so."
I tried to roll my eyes, but he'd entered the danger-zone. As in, my entire body was buzzing with hormones from his closeness. As in, I could practically see my reflection in his pretty eyes. As in, I must move out of his immediate proximity before I faint. Thankfully, he moved back, effectively halting the latter situation from happening.
"I'm paying you back," I said pointedly, blinking to clear up the lusty fog in my head. "For the truck too, eventually."
Now he was the one to roll his eyes. "You can try. I won't accept it."
"You won't accept payments for your work?" I asked, folding my arms over my chest.
"Nope."
"Now who's stubborn?"
"Still you."
I growled under my breath as Link called for the bill from the all-too-eager-to-serve waitress.
He paid and we left, the diner door jingling softly behind us.
"So, where to now?" Link asked, shrugging on his leather jacket.
"The school bathroom to hide until lunch." I said, only half-jokingly as I shivered in the chilly morning air. "Shoot. I forgot my jacket inside."
"I'll get—"
I cut him off. "No, you'll go wait by the truck while I get it." I said sternly.
He shook his head as if this were an unreasonable request, shoving his hands into his jacket pockets. "So stubborn." He muttered, starting off toward the green pick-up truck.
"Am not!" I yelled after him.
Link turned around, smiling. "Whatever helps you sleep at night, Princess."
I resisted the urge to stick my tongue out at him like an obnoxious kindergartener, and ducked back into The Old Hylian Mill—which, come to think of it, was a peculiar name, since the place was neither old nor a mill.
Once inside, I made a beeline for our now-vacant table. My sweater was draped over the backrest of the squeaky, vinyl seat; just where I'd left it. I grabbed the thing, slipped it on, and headed back outside. The door tingled cheerfully behind me again, and I started walking across the parking lot, sifting through my pockets for my phone. Hopefully the thing wasn't stolen, though I wasn't sure what anyone would want with my cheap, zero-rupee phone. Link was standing just where I told him to, leaned up against the driver's side of his truck.
Suddenly, I heard a deep rumbling to my left, like the revving of an engine. Startled, I looked up. The sound came from a big black SUV with a shiny silver grille, which glinted dangerously in the sunlight—and it was headed right for me.
A part of me was screaming, Move! Move! MOVE! But another part of me couldn't believe what I was seeing. That the driver hadn't slammed on his brakes yet or beeped the horn. Apparently, the shocked half of me was more prominent, because for all my brain screamed, my legs were dead weight beneath me.
Just before the vehicle crushed me, I felt something yank me back. I shrieked as I fell backward, my shoulders coming into contact with something warm and soft. The SUV roared past me, so close that the rush of air from its passing picked up the ends of my hair, and tossed it back at my face. A low oath sounded below me as the screech of car brakes cut through the thick, foggy morning air. I looked up in time to see the SUV tearing out of the parking lot, and out of sight.
The car didn't slow down, not even for a second, until it had to turn around.
I blinked. Wait. How am I even alive right now?
And then I felt it; the warmth, the rapidly beating heart against my back. There was someone underneath me.
As quickly as I could, I rolled off said person and pulled myself to a sitting position. Next to me, Link sat up, brushing the dust off his leather jacket. There was this strange hardness to his eyes, something I'd never seen on him before. Then he blinked and it was gone, making me wonder if it had ever really been there in the first place.
"Well," He said, leaning forward to rest his arms on his knees. "Let's not do that again."
I simply stared, speechless, for a moment. How? How did the driver miss me? I was wearing green and purple, for Din's sake! It's not like I was hard to miss! Finally, I broke out of my shell-shocked stupor.
"What the hell?" I shrieked. "That guy… it was almost like he was trying to hit me!"
A horrible feeling boiled in the pit of my gut. Oh no. Could I have been found out? Was the driver a Seeker?
I knew that not all Seekers wanted to obtain the Triforce; some of them wanted to destroy it, and me by default. Those were the scariest type of Seeker, the type that doesn't care if I live or die. The type that would prefer the latter.
I swallowed. Oh Goddess. That means I'll have to move back into HTPA headquarters. That means I'll have to leave my home, every one of my friends, and my future behind.
"Drunk driver, I bet." Link said, looking away from me.
I exhaled. Maybe he's right. It could've just been a drunk driver, though I'm not sure how many people drink this time of day. I don't have to say anything to HTPA about this incident—
"We should call the police." Link murmured, taking out his cell phone.
"No!" I blurted, snatching his phone from him without thinking.
"Why not?"
I blinked. Oh, I don't know. Maybe because if you do, I'll be yanked out of school, lose all contact with my friends, and will have to live in an underground base in the middle of a freaking desert. So it would be much preferred if you could refrain from doing so, please. Of course, I couldn't tell him that, he'd think I was baloney with a side of nuts.
"It's my guardian," I said instead, feeling slightly guilty for blaming every abnormality in my life on Impa. "She's protective, like I said before. If she finds out about this, I won't be allowed to leave the house." I forced a laugh. "She watches too many of those investigative TV shows about criminals."
After years of keeping secrets, I long ago become a pretty decent liar. Although it wasn't a skill I was particularly proud of, it was really coming in handy today.
Suddenly, another thing sunk in. I whipped my head around to Link's direction. "How did you do that?" I asked.
"Do what?"
I pointed to his truck, all the way across the lot. "You were over there, by your truck." I dropped my pointing finger. "And suddenly, you were right here behind me. How did you do it?" I couldn't hide the suspicion in my voice.
"No, I wasn't." Link answered, his expression suggesting he thought I must be on something.
"Yes, you were." I insisted. "I saw you."
He was using that confident-yet-condescending tone people only use when they're sure they're right. "No, I was walking with you."
I blinked at him. Why would he lie to me? Did he think I was stupid? "No, you weren't." I said with certainty. "You were standing right by your truck, like I asked you to. And then you pulled me out of the way of the SUV, even though you weren't anywhere near me…" I trailed off, realizing how insane it sounded. Had I really seen him there? Suddenly, I couldn't remember so well…
"You must have been in shock, Harkinian." He said after a moment. "You were probably just seeing things."
"But… I saw you…" I mumbled, beginning to doubt myself. "I… I think I did… Maybe."
"Harkinian…" Link sighed, just as a few of the waitresses and customers clamored through the doors.
"Are you kids okay?" The one that served us asked, her eyes wide with concern.
Link sighed, and plastered one of his dazzling smiles on his face before turning on the panicked women. "We're fine, thank you."
She returned the smile, sickly sweet. Gag. "That's a relief. Have you called the police?"
He nodded. "We reported a possible drunk-driver, yes." A perfectly executed lie. If hadn't known it wasn't true, I probably would've believed him.
Another waitress stepped out among the rest, older, probably somewhere in her late forties. "Y'all be careful, now." She said with the same sternness of a mother. "That was a close one."
I restrained myself from rolling my eyes. Yeah, 'cause I just like to hang out in front of fast-moving vehicles for shits and giggles.
"We will, ma'am." Link stood, and helped me up. "Let's get out of here." He muttered only to me, leading me to his truck.
"I... I swear I saw you at your truck." I mumbled, mostly to myself.
He sighed, exasperated. "Look, I did you a favor by not calling the police. Now do me one, and drop the subject."
I blinked. So he had been at his truck? I winced as a sudden headache beat its way through my skull. Great, yet another thing for me to worry about. It's already a long list, why not add more to it?
The Hylian Triforce Protection Agency headquarters was buried under several feet of sand, somewhere deep in the Gerudo Desert. Every room in the place sported security cameras, armed staff members and solid titanium wall plates. Mr. Agahnim, the founder and C.E.O, was a very rich man and built the place up until it could be the highest funded company in the country.
I currently sat between Impa and Nabooru in the little waiting room outside of Mr. Agahnim's office. We were all dressed semi-formally in dress pants and blouses, our hair tied back in tight buns. Business trips to HTPA always called for professional attire.
Mr. Agahnim's assistant/secretary—Veran Grimsby, judging by the little golden plaque sitting atop her desk—sat in a desk in the far corner of the room, typing away at her computer.
For about the eighth time since we got here, I asked Veran what time it was.
"4:36." Veran said in a snide, irritated tone.
I rolled my eyes. Then put up a friggin clock in here. I then went back to my obsessive thumb-twiddling, though it was hard because Impa had a firm hold on my hand.
Nabooru wrapped an arm around my shoulders and gave me a comforting squeeze. "Don't worry, Blondie." She murmured. "I'm sure everything's just fine with Mr. Agahnim, and you'll be in an' out of there in a flash."
I nodded, sending her a feeble smile.
At that moment, a voice rang out of Veran's intercom. "Veran, send Miss Harkinian in, please."
I swallowed. Nab nodded at me in encouragement. After taking several deep breaths, I stood up, only to be tugged back down. I looked back in surprise, realizing Impa had been the one to keep me in place. She too, seemed surprised by her actions, and immediately dropped my hand.
"Sorry, dear." She muttered, folding her hands on her lap. "Go on."
I knit my brow together. Lately, Impa has been acting so strange, and I can't for the life of me place why.
"Imps, is something—?" I began.
"Mr. Agahnim wishes to see you, Miss Harkinian." Veran snapped from her place behind her computer. "Don't keep him waiting."
I restrained a glare in the secretary's direction and marched up to the grand, solid metal doors. As I approached, the doors opened with a faint whoosh sound. I took another unsteady breath and stepped through.
The room was grand, the ceiling high and the walls tall. The walls were metal plated, like the rest of the building, but these plates were polished almost to resemble a mirror and there were tiny decorative designs etched into its surface. Plaques and other framed paperwork adorned the walls, and a large shimmering chandelier hung from the ceiling. In the center of the room, there was a large oak desk. Sitting at the oak desk, was Mr. Agahnim himself.
He was a large man, and I didn't mean fat. I mean, the big body-builder kind of large. He was tall with skin paler than even mine, with lank dark hair gelled back to expose his forehead. His eyes flashed gold as I stepped in the office, already uncomfortable.
"Miss Harkinian." He said, waving me over. "Come and sit with me." He gestured to the cushy red armchair that sat at the other side of his desk.
A chill ran down my spine. This man, despite the fact that he was my boss and therefore a good person, was giving me some seriously bad vibes. Slowly but surely, I hesitantly made my way to the armchair and sat down.
"Now, as I'm sure you're aware, we've been having problems finding this thief." Mr. Agahnim began. "It's been a very long time since one group of Seekers has caused this company so much trouble. And you, Miss Harkinian, are our only agent who's come into direct contact with one of them."
I winced quietly. No wonder they've been doubting me; that sounds pretty suspicious.
Mr. Agahnim leaned forward on his desk, golden eyes scrutinizing me in a way that made me squirm. "I have received information that this boy told you he was not a Seeker, correct?"
I nodded. "Yes, sir."
"And he said he was not after the Hero's weapons for money, yes?"
Another nod, and I shifted my weight uncomfortably.
Mr. Agahnim leaned back against his chair's backrest again. "And what does this boy look like?"
I blinked. "What? Sir, I have already given a description of—"
"Answer the question, Miss Harkinian."
I swallowed my protests. "He was… he was young, I think. My age or a little older. From the little patch of skin I could see, he looked tanned. Slimmer build, but definitely muscled." I stopped, blushing. It had felt odd the first time I gave this description, but now it felt even stranger. I needed to just suck it up. Not-Astley was probably a good-looking guy, but that didn't make him a good person. "Um, he had dark blond-ish hair, blue eyes and really long eyelashes…" I trailed off. Goddesses, I did almost sound like I had the hots for him, didn't I? "I think." I added to lower suspicion.
Mr. Agahnim stared at me a moment, his face unreadable. "I see."
Had I said something wrong? I stared at my sweaty hands on my lap, biting the inside of my cheek so hard it hurt.
"And this… boy, you said he seemed to have strange powers of some sort?"
"Yes, sir." I said, glancing up at my boss warily. "He… seemed to be able to… teleport, or something. And his fighting skills seemed incredibly advanced for someone so young." I winced again. The whole 'teleportation' thing seemed so asinine when you hear it out loud.
"Miss Harkinian, tell me." Mr. Agahnim started straightening the papers and files on his desk. "Have you ever heard of Farore's Wind?"
I looked up, nodding. "Of course, sir. It's one of the three spells that each of the Great Fairies of Hyrule granted to the Hero of Time, right?"
"Correct." Mr. Agahnim nodded in approval. "Now, about a week ago, we received reports from the museum holding them that one was stolen."
"Farore's Wind." I finished for him in awe.
My boss clapped lightly as if I'd preformed a perfect backflip. I ducked my head to hide my red face.
"Correct again, Miss Harkinian." He said in a voice that suggested I was a bit slow. "But what do the legends say about those spells?"
I racked my brain for the answer. What did those legends say about the spell? Sheesh, for someone who practically starred in the legends, I sure as heck don't know much about them. "Um, I'm not entirely sure, sir." I finally admitted.
Mr. Agahnim regarded me dryly, as if disappointed with my lack of knowledge. "The legends say only the wielder of Wisdom or Courage can use them."
I blinked slowly, before what he was hinting at sunk in. "You—you think that I helped him?" I asked, my voice rising unevenly. "I would never help—!"
"Please calm yourself, Miss Harkinian, I accused you of no such thing."
I clamped my mouth shut. "I apologize, sir."
He nodded, acknowledging my apology. I wasn't so sure he was accepting it though. "I feel that perhaps the wielder of Courage may have been manipulated into this."
It made sense: Not-Astley was an incredible fighter from what I could tell, he can apparently use Farore's Wind, and he seemed convinced that what he was doing was right. But something about the theory felt… off, like there was something we were missing. Or perhaps I was just thinking about what the legends said about Wisdom (me) and Courage, about their… relationship together.
The legends always said they fell in love, and though it is unknown whether their blood ever mixed, it was a definite possibility. Maybe I was letting that possibility change my better judgement. Maybe I just wanted him to be every bit as perfect as the legends say. Maybe I wanted to fall for someone wonderful like the girls in my romance novels.
I closed my eyes as the blush crept onto my face. That must've been why HTPA assumed that I had a crush on my enemy; because they theorized he might've been the Hero.
"That… very well could be, sir." I said flatly, with uncertainty.
Satisfied, Mr. Agahnim leaned forward again on his glossy oak desk. "I'm sure Ms. Peers has shared our theory about where approximately we may find this boy, correct?"
I nodded. "Yes, in Ordon."
"And is there anyone you've seen which you suspect could be the thief?"
I shook my head. "No sir, but I'll keep an eye out for anything suspicious."
My boss folded his hands on his desk. "I see." His tone suggested he didn't quite believe me.
I tried not to defend myself, and bit back the protests that bubbled on my tongue.
"Well then, Miss Harkinian," Mr. Agahnim said, shuffling some of the files on his desk before turning his attention to his sleek computer screen. "That was all I wanted to speak with you about. You are dismissed."
I stood, slightly shaky on my feet. Was that seriously it? He called me here to tell me things I already knew and something Impa could've just as easily told me?
I clenched my hands around the waist of my shirt, seething. No. This was all to get a message across: We don't trust you. If you know what's good for you, you won't betray us.
"Thank you, sir." I said, backing up until I heard the door's telltale whoosh sound behind me. I got your message loud and clear.
"Zellie, have you ever stopped to wonder what the purpose of earlobes are?" Malon asked as she slid into the picnic bench across from me.
We were eating outside, since it was now officially May, and therefore that much closer to summer. And Ruto wanted to work on her tan. She was currently lying across the empty part of the picnic bench, her fair arms tilted upward to catch the sun's rays, her leg dangling off the edge of the bench.
I glanced up from my vacant staring contest with my greasy cafeteria French fries and frowned. "Hello to you too, and, um, what?"
"Earlobes." She replied, unwrapping her sandwich. "Do they even have a purpose?"
I stared at her a moment, trying to figure out what was going on inside that weird little head of hers.
"You're so weird." Midna commented mildly in the seat next to me, stirring her instant noodles.
Next to Malon, Ilia snorted into her water bottle, resulting in a jab to the ribs from Malon.
"Seriously though," She pressed. "Have you ever wondered what they do?"
"Earlobes?" I repeated, raising a brow.
She nodded.
"No."
"Never." Midna replied, popping a noodle into her mouth.
"Nope." Ilia said with a shrug.
"Not really, Mally." Ruto said, cracking one eye open under her sunglasses.
"Well, time to get philosopical." Malon said.
"Philosophical." I corrected. "And what exactly brought this on?"
Malon shrugged and idly stirred her iced tea with her straw. "In science, Mr. Ingo was discussing all the useless parts of the human body. I wondered if earlobes fit into the category." She picked up a hollow piece of ice with her straw and cracked it between her teeth.
"They must do something," Midna finally reasoned, braiding a small portion of her tri-coloured hair. "Otherwise we wouldn't have them."
"Not necessarily," Malon said, holding up a finger. "I mean, men have nipples and they totally don't need them."
Ilia snorted again, reaching over to steal a fry from me. "I love how you've totally changed the subject to nipples now. I mean, that's great." She bit into the soggy fry and grimaced. "Ew, is there vinegar on these?"
I nodded and she wrinkled her nose, ditching the rest of the fry on the lush school grass.
"Actually," Midna said, twisting her noodles on her fork expertly. "Both earlobes and nipples on men have purposes."
"Which would be…?" Malon inquired.
Midna shrugged. "To pierce them, of course." She lifted the hair from around her ear, gesturing to the many silver piercings that dotted their way up her cartilage and down to her earlobe.
"No way," Malon argued, shaking her head. "Do you think Farore created earlobes with the idea of shoving metal through them in mind?" She snorted. "And pierced nipples? No thank you."
"So you don't find pierced nipples sexy?" Midna asked, tugging her new braid free when she wasn't satisfied with it. "You're missing out, man."
At that, Ruto sat up, shoving her sunglasses atop her head. "New topic!" She declared, singing her legs around so that they were now under the table. "Do you find ear piercings on a guy hot?"
"This conversation is reducing us to bimbos." I interjected, only to be ignored.
Midna smiled. "Oh, heck yeah."
Malon shrugged indifferently, chewing on her straw. "I don't really care. It wouldn't turn me off if I was asked out by a guy with ear piercings."
"Depends," Ilia said, twisting her water bottle cap on the picnic table. "If the rest of him is sexy, then sure." She re-screwed the lid back onto the bottle. "Now if he's some big, sweaty kid, I'm not too sure ear piercings will do much to help."
"I thought it was the inside that counts?" I said innocently, popping a vinegar-soaked fry into my mouth.
"Of course," Malon agreed. "But I mean, hotness is kind of like gravy: The meal is delicious without it, but it's even tastier with it." She frowned. "…or something along those lines."
I rolled my eyes. "Hm. Brilliant analogy there, Mally Ball."
Malon giggled and threw her crumpled up, now-empty sandwich wrap at me. "Thanks, Zellie Bell."
"Zellie!" Someone called behind me. Actually, it sounded more like Zellieeeeeeeeeeee!
I turned around to find Saria skipping over to our lunch table, Mido stumbling on behind her like a lovesick puppy. She hopped up to our table, her short, forest green hair bouncing around her head from the movement. Her matching green t-shirt bore the phrase: Fish are Friends, Not Food! Saria was literally one of the only people I've met our age who was actually smaller than me.
"Sari." I nodded to her. "What's up?"
"Oh nothing, really," She said. "The eco team's having another rally this weekend, and in two weeks we'll be planting trees in Hyrule Field, and after that, we'll…"
Having finally caught up with Saria, Mido mumbled very quietly next to her, "The fight, Saria. Don't forget about the fight."
"Oh!" Saria clamped a hand over her mouth. "Thanks, Mido!" she gasped, grabbing his hands, and shaking them in thanks. He blushed, and scurried away once she released him.
Saria didn't seem to notice his retreat and turned to me. "Zellie, you won't believe it!" She giggled, literally hopping in excitement.
"Believe what?" I asked curiously.
"There's a fight!" She sang, clasping her hands together.
I raised a brow, and picked up a fry to nibble on. "Hmm. Okay, Sar. I think we need to talk about this little sadism problem you have there."
Another giggle bubbled from her mouth and she shook her head fervently. "No, no, no, Zellie!" Saria paused, gathering her bearings. "The fight's about you!"
I nearly choked on the fry. Midna reached over to pat my back as I sputtered.
"What do you mean, 'the fight's about me'?" I asked after taking a long sip of water to ease my cough.
"I mean, like, it's over you!" Saria said as if it were obvious.
I waited for her to start laughing and tell me she was kidding, but she only continued to look genuinely excited.
"You're serious?" I asked.
"Yes, I'm serious!"
I bit my lip, tilting my head back and forth as I contemplated whether this was real. Alright, I'll bite. "Who's it between?"
"Okay, so you know that guy? You know the one with the one red hair spike who's kinda big and burly? I think he's in your English class." Saria tapped her chin.
Of course I knew who she was talking about; he sat in front of me and has been shooting me weird glances all semester. One day when I was having a cranky day, I'd snapped at him, asking why he kept staring at me. He'd gotten all red-faced, and mumbled something incoherent, before turning away from me without even answering the question. Afterwards, I'd felt kind of bad for snapping at him. I think his name was Goose or something.
"What about him?" I asked warily.
"Well, you know how you've been getting a lot of attention from Link lately?"
As if I could forget. "Yeah," I said, growing more uneasy.
Saria giggled again, utterly too giddy to be delivering this news. "So once Spikey-head found out about that, he confronted Link in the parking lot. Just trying to pick a fight, I guess. Right now he's just yelling at him, but it could very well turn into a fist fight. Real soon."
She was barely finished talking before I stood up from my spot, and dashed in the direction of the parking lot.
Okay. I really didn't want to end that chapter there, but hey? Wadda'ya gonna do? It was getting too long.
Thanks to everyone! I love your faces (And the rest of you!) for the support!
Review if you please!
