That afternoon, I go straight to Madge's house.

Of course, I have to wait. Finally, I see her kiss Gale on the cheek and run towards me, her hair flapping in the mind. A grin stretches from ear to ear. "Hey, Katniss," she greets me, smirking.

"Hey, my no longer best friend. Why didn't you tell me you ditched? I mean, it's understandable you wanted time alone with Gale, but couldn't you of warned me so I didn't have to go to school with no friends and embarass myself?"

It takes her a second to digest all of my complaints, and then, she bites her lip. "I'm sorry."

Sighing, I grab her hand and pull her in a secluded corner. "I have so much to tell you, Madge." Madge and I rarely discuss Peeta for a variety of reasons. One, Gale is often around. Two, it's hard to find anywhere to talk privately. Three, I am pretty sensitive about it, so it's rare that I let her in.

Her eyes widen. "What?" she says. Her voice is pretty loud, and several heads turn our way. "Sorry," she says, clearing her throat. "What?" she asks again, softer this time.

"Let's have a gathering," I say. A "gathering" is basically when Madge and I go to the lake by ourselves and swim and sometimes have a sleepover in the cabin. We started the ritual when we first became close friends. We only have one when something big happens, usually: Madge and Gale start dating, Peeta and I are talking. Sometimes, though, we'll go just to take a break from the annoying world that is Panem.

We pace into the woods. After about a mile, we find the lake. I dip my toes in and she sits across from me, her eyes begging for information.

"We had like, an actual conversation today, Peeta and I," I tell her, the soft water rushing between my toes. "We talked for hours, and-"

"Hours?" she asks, shocked. I nod.

"Then, he asked me to hang out tomorrow after school. Does that mean...?"

"You mean, is it a date? Personally, I would think so. I suggest play it cool. I mean, Gale asked me to hang out one time, and it wasn't a date. You know, before me were dating. Just... follow his lead," she answers.

Groaning, I pluck a flower from the grass and twirl the stem. This is why I hate dating. Well, partly. Only most people would think I was pretentious if I told them the real reason, so I never do.

Dating implies that two people aren't serious. Well, I take that back. Gale and Madge are serious. Then again, they are boyfriend and girlfriend. But, really, how am I supposed to casually date Peeta when I've loved him for years? It feels like taking a step backwards. Also, the whole idea just seems a little superficial and cliche. I just want to be there with him through thick and thin. I realize, though, that none of this is in my control, so I'll just have to figure it out.

Maybe I'm scared that the Peeta I fell in love with is a lie. It's total bullshit, but I can't stop the thought from passing my mind. What if this wasn't the same Peeta who threw me the bread? What if I'm in love with... what else could I be in love with?

I'm no good with words. In fact, it amazes me how deeply I am in love and yet I can't even figure out the concept myself. I'd always thought we'd mutually fall in love under different circumstances. What if having mutual feelings isn't good enough?

Hours later I'm in my bed, under my covers. Sighing into my pillow, I steady myself for tomorrow, which brings nothing but uncertainty. But perhaps, a future with the boy with the bread, whatever that future may be.