Author's note: Lololololololololol. It's been over three years, and here we are again. I said I would finish it, and I have. OTL'''''' If you're still subscribed to this, PLEASE FORGIVE ME. T.T I've no doubt that you will be disappointed. =.= /fail

Chapter 4 - The Lost Chapter

Fakir, Duck, and Uzura burst through the reeds surrounding the pond. Fakir already had his sword drawn and was looking around wildly, muttering something under his breath about bulls and stabbing. Uzura was looking at their surroundings curiously from behind Duck's legs. Duck was looking at the pond.

Nothing seemed to be out of the ordinary. The reeds waved gently in the wind, the water lapped slightly against the shore, rose petals drifted across its surface. . . .

"Fakir!" squeaked Duck. "Rose . . ."

"Ohoho!" said a voice from the opposite bank, and Femio stepped out from behind a tree. "What have we here?" He brushed his hand through his hair dramatically.

"You!" cried Fakir, pointing his sword menacingly at the figure.

"Me!" cried Femio, raising his hands in the air. "I have tried to correct my wrongs and distract you from my beauty, and yet you still are drawn to me! Did my letters not deceive you?" He covered his face with one hand and looked away. "Did you see through my artfully-constructed prose and recognize my beautiful handwriting? Again I have failed to make others love someone besides me! Pour judge–"

"Femio!" cried Duck. "Stop! No bulls!"

"Oh?" said Femio, looking at her mournfully. "But I deserve judgement! Even you" – here he produced a rose and held it against his chest – "have fallen for me, not for the knight who stands besides you, my cousin –"

"N-n-not your cousin!" said Fakir, his arm shaking with anger. He was beet red. Femio ignored him.

"– who so gallantly rescued you in the past. He is more deserving of you than I – I, who steal all the world's love!" He threw the rose into the pond and hugged himself in anguish.

"You think Duck and Fakir should be lovey-dovey too, zura?" asked Uzura curiously. She had come out from behind Duck's legs.

"Ah!" cried Femio, his eyes lighting up. He produced another rose and knelt down, offering it to Uzura even though he was still on the opposite bank. "And who, beautiful maiden with the unblinking blue eyes, might you be?"

"I'm Uzura, zuuuura!" She produced her drumsticks and banged proudly on her drum.

"Uzura, stop it!" Fakir hissed at her. "And you!" He turned his attention back to Femio. "You wrote that letter? You insulted both myself and Duck!" There was a crazed look in his eyes that reminded Duck uncomfortably of Drosselmeyer, though now that she thought about it, Femio acted much more like Drosselmeyer than Fakir ever had. . . . "How could you believe that Duck would confess her love to me in such a manner?"

"I know!" cried Femio. "This is unforgivable. Pour judgement upon –"

"No!" cried Duck.

Fakir leaped away into the reeds, careening around the edge of the pond.

"– this sinner! Aieeee!" Femio had just spotted Fakir racing towards him, waving his sword, and he began running in the opposite direction.

And so the story stalls! Femio, you make a terrible prince. Uzura, take over. This is becoming ridiculous. As this rate the story will never end, and we've had enough of that.

Uzura looked up into the sky. "No, zura. You're a mean old man, zura. Fakir and Duck should be together, zuuura!" She banged angrily on her drum and wouldn't stop, even though Duck tugged at her arm.

"Uzura, please," said Duck, looking fearfully around at Fakir, who was gaining on Femio. Just then, a bull intercepted them and ran over Femio. It snorted a little, looked back at the flattened Femio, walked over to some grass, and began to graze. Fakir took the opportunity to poke the tip of his sword into Femio's back.

"Now," he growled, "tell me where the book is that you've been writing in!"

"It's . . . there!" he gasped out dramatically, pointing at Uzura, and fainted.

Fakir looked at Uzura. Duck looked at Uzura. Uzura stopped banging on her drum and looked at the pond, and then at Duck. She smiled. "I've been helping Femio write the letters, zura, so he let me keep them!" She pulled a packet of envelopes out of her rather poofy pants and handed them to Duck.

"Wh-wh-what?" said Fakir, who was still standing over Femio, dumbfounded. He turned white, then red again. "The story was the letters?"

"Except for the first one Duck got, zura. That was just the mean old man being mean."

"But – but – which letters? Not the letters to the girls at school, too?"

Duck looked at Fakir, frowning. "What letters to the girls at school?"

"That was my idea, zura! To make everyone angry at Fakir except Duck!"

"But, none of that was true. I had never danced with any of those girls before!"

"It will be, zura."

Fakir started to turn purple. "And . . . and . . . the last letter? The one where Duck . . . said . . . she loved me?" He had trailed off into a whisper.

"Quack!" said Duck, and turned into one.

Uzura began to bang on her drum again. "Already true, zuuuura!" and she pushed Duck into the pond.

"Aie!" said Fakir, who shielded his eyes just as girl-Duck surfaced.

"But–but–but–" said Duck, crimson.

"I–I–I–" said Fakir at the same time. She stood up. "Here!" he cried, and threw his cloak at her. She hastily put it on. "Let's just – go home," he said still not looking at her and still the color of ripe tomatoes.

"Ah, ok," she said, and hastily ran over to him. He stuck out his hand, still not looking at her. She looked at him, and it, and took it.

"Stupid Femio," he muttered.

"Yeah," she said, laughing nervously. "I guess he was, uh–"

Without warning, Fakir leaned over and kissed her hastily on the forehead. "I love you too, stupid Duck," he mumbled, and kept walking. Duck covered her mouth with her hand and tried to not make any noise. I love you too, stupid Duck, I love you too, stupid Duck, said Fakir's voice in her head. "Mnm," she managed to get out, and held his hand more tightly.

Uzura watched them for a few moments before she began to bang on her drum again. She walked over to Femio and yelled in his ear, "We did good. They're lovey-dovey, zuuuuuuura!"

Insolent puppet! Insolent false prince! Insolent narrator! How could you attempt to give them a happy ending? They don't deserve happiness! They don't even deserve glory! If I still had hands that were attached to me –!

"You're wrong," Uzura told the sky. "They do deserve happiness, zura. Just like everyone else." And she began to cry, because she knew that it was over.

And she was right.

- The End -