I regret this decision. I regret this decision immediately.
She stared at me blankly. She didn't even blink once. So... I did what any brave soul would do in the face of an imminent and predictable rejection... I ran.
Kaoru looked at me worriedly as I came home. I hadn't spoken at all during the car ride, and I hadn't talked even during our dinner. We were so close, and yet, this was something I didn't want to say. If I'd said it out loud the rejection would become official. It'd make it so much more official.
As Hikaru stressed about what happened, Haruhi was equally as flustered and worried.
"What did he mean?" She said irritably. "And why do I even care so much!?" As she paced around her room she thought on everything her friend Mei had told her. Everything Mei had speculated at, had teased Haru about, and talked to Haruhi about. With exasperation she flopped onto her small bed wishing she could scream in frustration. She felt so... so happy, but so worried and so panicked. She couldn't enjoy the words because she was too busy puzzling out what they meant. I like you too, Hikaru. We've always been friends, so why wouldn't I? Why is this confusing to me? He's my friend. I like him because he's my friend. I respect him... But that doesn't explain the feelings I get around him.
When she was near him her heart raced wildly, her stomach felt queasy, yet she felt inexplicably light. His voice gave her shivers, his wide yet mischievous eyes made her smile, and when he said her name she couldn't help but blush. Do I feel that way for Tamaki or Kyoya? What about Kaoru? Hani? Or Mori? When it came down to it, no, she did not have those reactions to any of the other host club members. She didn't have those sorts of reactions for any other boy in general. Why Hikaru then? The confused brunette sighed once more, and pushed away the confusing thoughts.
Yet she couldn't help but smile as she thought of him. "I like you..." She whispered, "And I think Mei might just be right..."
Hikaru had the most trouble sleeping he'd had in a long few nights. Kaoru slept fitfully as well, in worry for his brother. Finally, after hours of silence, Hikaru whispered sheepishly, "I told Haruhi I liked her, but I didn't say it how I wished I would have... and I didn't get a response."
Kaoru's heart stopped for a moment before he smirked. They lay near each other, not touching but close enough any way. "I think that's good you told her, but when you came over to me... you seemed like you'd ran... did you even give her time to GET a response?" If he knew Hikaru...
"No..." Hikaru replied slowly.
It was as Kaoru thought. "Well, just... don't worry. I know it seems worrisome right now, but maybe tomorrow will surprise you. No use wasting precious sleeping time now though. Go to sleep Hika... It'll feel better tomorrow." The silence was answer enough, Hikaru had heard and seen the logic of Kaoru's words. It'd be better to sleep now, think tomorrow... And well, who knows?
The drive to school was a long one, yet somehow, it was far too short. Homeroom was even worse. He sat next to Haruhi, and although they'd said hello the awkwardness was very tangible. He couldn't speak properly near her, and she seemed nearly as bad. Kaoru couldn't handle it. This sort of tension had to stop, and stop now. At break, he told Hikaru to confront her. Easier said than done, Hikaru scoffed, yet he agreed in any case.
The class filed out, chatting happily, yet Haruhi stayed in her seat as she dug around her bag for her lunch, and Hikaru watched her quietly. His thoughts bounced about like frightened rabbits, and he couldn't keep up with each new idea and worry that came and went. Finally, she met his eyes.
"Are you alright?" The doe-eyed girl asked so innocently, the concern obvious in her tone. It was enough to break Hikaru out of his trance, and it gave him the courage to do what he wanted to. Although it may not have been what either of them were expecting, neither of them minded either. In fact, maybe it was better this way. When both people were so scared to say what was on their mind, maybe... well maybe showing it... rather than saying it would be easier.
His lips met her briefly and as he moved away, ready to leave, she grabbed his arm. He couldn't meet her eyes, yet neither could she. In silence he stood there, not moving away yet not moving closer. And Haruhi sat in her chair, not meeting his eyes, not saying a word. The silence stretched out between them, until it was nearly unbearable.
They both broke out at once, Hikaru exclaiming, "I'm sorry-" yet he stopped abrubtly as he registered what Haruhi had whispered. Blushing, Haruhi repeated herself, "Is this real?" She paused, unsure of how to phrase it, but after a moment of hesitation plowed on anyway. "Do you really mean it? Hikaru... I'll say it, to be fair... Hikaru, I li-" She was cut short by his look of disbelief. "Hikaru?" Haruhi asked, now equal parts worried and flustered.
Finally he whispered, "I love you, Haruhi."
