When Chris stormed out of the sushi restaurant, he really didn't expect Darren to chase after him.
"Chris! C'mon I drove us here, let me take you back to the set," Darren called, jogging through the parking lot to catch up with Chris. Darren grabbed his shoulder, but Chris yanked it out of his grasp.
"I'm perfectly capable of getting a cab or calling someone else to come get me," Chris snapped, digging through his bag to pull out his cell phone.
"In this traffic, you'll be waiting for a long time," Darren pointed out. "Please, let's just be civil adults here."
Chris bared his teeth at the poorly veiled insult. "I'd rather fucking wait for hours than spend even one minute in a car alone with you." Chris jabbed his finger roughly into Darren's sternum.
Darren backed up and pinched the bridge of his nose, breathing slowly. He needed to calm down. Chris had every right to turn down his offer of being friends, even still hate him. But they needed to keep some peace if they were going to work together.
"Please Chris," Darren said calmly. "We can keep this relationship strictly professional. As much as I want more, I really would like to not have hostility here. We're costars, so we are going to be around each other a lot."
Chris bit his bottom lip, his eyes softening. Darren was right, but Chris really didn't want to admit that out loud.
"Fine," Chris sighed, crossing his arms. "I just want to know one thing."
"Sure," Darren nodded, prompting Chris with a respectful gesture of his hands.
"Why do you want more from me? It doesn't make sense."
Darren pushed down his flash of annoyance and hurt. "I already told you, it's because I still really care about you."
Chris scoffed. "A likely response."
"It's true," Darren protested, lip pouting. Chris was torn between the overwhelming desires to bite that lip or to punch him so hard that it made that stupid lip bleed.
"That doesn't explain why you never called," Chris pointed out bitterly, kicking the black top with the toe of his shoe.
"What?"
Chris pushed on, irritated by Darren's ignorance. "In some strange, twisted way I can see your reasoning to why you left me all alone, but we had a certain relationship dynamic, Darren. Why didn't you ever talk to me again?"
Darren smiled sadly. "I was too afraid," he admitted. "I honestly thought I would hold you back from your dreams."
"That's a fucking ridiculous assumption," Chris bit out. "You knew how much I cared about you. I deserved at least a fucking phone call."
Darren ran a hand through his curls, frustrated. "You're right, Chris. I'm a fucking asshole. I wanted to call, I really did. But once I was moved into my dorm at the University of Michigan, the more terrified I felt at the prospect of speaking to you again. As more time passed, it got even worse."
Chris was quiet for a few moments before he said harshly, "You know, I would've never fucking done that to you."
Darren sighed again, his heart hurting, a pounding migraine coming on. "I know. You're a better person than me. I deserve to be your punching bag."
"I'm not going to hurt you," Chris said quietly, balling his hands into fists. Even if he ever wanted to strike Darren, that was something he wouldn't resort to, even in the worst of moments.
Darren pulled out his jingling keys. "Let's go back. They're probably wondering about our whereabouts."
They drove again in silence, but it wasn't as bad this time. Darren finally said he wanted to say, and even though nothing really good came from it, at least he got it off his chest. Also, now Chris' thoughts seemed much less loud, but still persistent none the less.
"I have another question," Chris said after a while.
"Hmmm?" Darren prompted, slightly distracted by the heavy traffic.
"You have a girlfriend," Chris stated, his tone bordering resentfulness.
"That's not a question, Chris."
"Ugh, fine," Chris paused, shifting awkwardly in his seat. "You finally figured it out then? Are you like bisexual now?"
Darren clenched his jaw. "No."
"No?" Chris was confused.
"I'm straight," Darren informed, his voice wavering so slightly.
Chris instantly got pissed off again. "So I was just like some fucking experiment to you or something? That makes me feel awesome."
"No, I loved you I really did," Darren insisted. "But I like girls."
"Thats a fucking crock of shit!"
"No it's not! How is me loving you a load of bull?" Darren demanded.
"You're making me out to be some freak accident or fluke or something!" Chris shrieked.
"You weren't," Darren panicked, his chest tightening. He really didn't want to give Chris the wrong idea and make him hate him further. "I just have never been sexually attracted to men except for you. It took me a while to figure that out; crazy adventures in college and all, but now I'm finally with someone I really like. Who is female."
Chris saw a faint blush creep up on his cheeks. Darren's discomfort made Chris feel better, as bad as that sounded, despite the fact that Chris felt revolted at the idea of Darren fucking a girl.
"But we never had sex though, how could you possibly know that you were attracted to me in that way," Chris asked quietly, feeling self-conscious.
"I know, but, I just know," Darren stammered, avoiding Chris' gaze.
"Huh?"
"Chris, I wanted to have sex with you, I was just scared because I was a virgin," Darren let out in a rush, his body tingling with latent arousal. Thankfully Chris didn't seem to notice.
"You were?" Chris' eyes widened, surprised. Darren always seemed like the more experienced and knowledgable one. Once Chris actually thought about it, they never really talked about past sexual experiences. They were too shy.
"Yeah," Darren swallowed. "And having sex with a girl seemed like a less daunting task. So once it happened, turned out I liked it. So I'm not gay."
"You're not making any sense," Chris said sharply. "You're fucking logic is skewed."
"Can we please change the subject," Darren's stomach was twisting in knots.
"Whatever," Chris muttered, crossing his arms and looking out the window again.
Chris was quiet for a bit before he turned to Darren again, the wheels turning in his head. "Since we're going to be working together, I can deal with that. But don't expect pizza nights, beers or hanging out on a regular basis. We can go over scrips together if you have a question, and we can practice and theorize, but that's it alright? I take this job very seriously and it means a lot to me."
Darren nodded, feeling relieved at the prospect of this actually working out alright. "Deal."
Darren flipped through his new script, thinking back on his first week of being on the Glee cast. He seemed to get along okay with everyone, and he was already growing a great fondness for Amber, who's voice was out of this world. However, he didn't see them much because he was off with the Warblers.
Thus, for the most part him and Chris kept things professional, so the hostility was at a minimum. It was clear nobody suspected they had a past together, nor did Chris tell anyone, otherwise Darren would be expecting hellfire.
Darren was already blown away by working with Chris. Filming 'Teenage Dream' with him was breathtaking because it was really something else to see Chris fall into an entirely new character. Darren just ate it up, because when Chris was Kurt, Kurt was swooning over Blaine, who by extension was Darren. He didn't know why this was his favorite part, but the creators instantly picked up on their chemistry.
So here he was, and the script was reading now was rather short since the only scene Darren had to do was the Breadstix scene with Kurt and Mercedes; which was actually quite a funny sequence and he was looking forward to it.
Darren's stomach rumbled, so he decided to order some thai food. Ordering the grub just for himself and listening to the silence of his empty apartment made him feel lonely. Even though Chris was totally uninterested in being friends, maybe Darren could bribe him into coming over to go over the script together. Darren could pretend he was feeling clueless, and Chris would come straightaway since he was nothing but a perfectionist.
Darren took out his iPhone and hesitated over the call button before pressing a shaking finger to the touch screen and put the phone to his ear. It rang a few times before abruptly going to voicemail.
Maybe Chris accidentally pressed ignore. Maybe he pressed it on purpose. Either way Darren decided to call again to make sure, feeling a little weird about his behavior, but chose to ignore the implications.
It didn't even ring once when Chris answered in a breathless, "Hi?"
"Hey, Chris. It's uh, Darren. Obviously. I was just wondering-"
"I'm kind of in the middle of something," Chris interrupted urgently, struggling with each word like he had just run a mile. Whywasheoutofbreath? Darren wondered. "What do you want? Is it an emergency?"
"No.. just.. are you alright," Darren asked, a little concerned.
"Yeah just-" Chris broke off and moaned quietly. The sound shot through Darren, making his heart constrict nervously and his body became rigid as a board. WasChris..?
"What are you doing, why did you answer, you're supposed to me fucking me," a muffled voice whined on the other line. Darren's mouth fell open. Chris was having sex right now. Or he was supposed to be, but he answered the phone. Shit.
Darren felt blood rush to his face, and probably another questionable area but he spluttered, "oh, fuck sorry, I didn't mean to-"
"No it's fine, I'll call you back soon okay?"
"No, please don't," Darren begged before hanging up the phone quickly. He ran his hands over his face, mortified. He couldn't believe that just happened, and now Darren worried if he'll be able to look at Chris in the eye on set Monday without blushing.
Who was Chris having sex with anyway? Was it somebody Darren knew? Was this guy Chris' boyfriend? Realization hit Darren once he remembered that when they talked last week, they didn't talk about Chris' personal life at all. Darren did most of the talking, and Chris was like an iron wall of secrecy.
This made Darren curious, frustrated, and jealous all at the same time. He suddenly felt so overwhelmed that tears flooded his eyes. They once dated and were in love, it was only natural to feel this way, right? Darren considered calling his girlfriend to cheer him up, but he really didn't feel like talking to her at the moment.
Darren plopped himself down on his couch again, pushing away his forgotten scrip and resting his chin into the palm of his hand. He wanted to be apart of Chris' life. They were separated for so long, and it made him feel sick to his stomach how far they've grown apart. Even though he knew it was entirely his fault, he felt like he a duty to fix it. It was possible that Chris would maybe cave in some day. It was possible. It could happen. Never say never.
Darren laughed bitterly to himself and walked into the bathroom. He needed to take a nice and long hot shower to clear his head. He stripped naked and got in, letting the steam soak into his pores, and he sighed contentedly.
Chris was fucking some other guy right now. Darren shook his head like it would make that incriminating thought go away, but even more curiosities flowed in. How big was Chris? Was Chris reaching orgasm right now? If so, what did his face look like when it happened? Was the guy screaming because Chris was pounding into him so good?
Darren's body stilled when he realized that he started stroking himself without even knowing it happened. He was actually painfully hard and aching knowing that Chris was a top. Fuck. Shit. Fuck. That was really fucking hot.
Darren imagined Chris spreading his thighs apart and working him open before sliding his cock in and going to town. Darren's finger pressed his hole lightly before he groaned loudly and came faster than he expected to, his come splattering the bathroom wall.
"Oh," Darren whispered as his legs almost gave out from the force of his pleasure. He leaned against the wall, feeling his nerves twitch and caressing his sensitive skin with his fingertips, letting the shower wash his filth away.
Well, ok. This was new. This was also bad. Even though Darren didn't want to admit that his sexuality was in question once again, because shit, he just imagined his ex and current costar fucking him. Suddenly Darren felt like he didn't know anything anymore, and he felt just as lost as he did when he was a senior in high school.
The only thing Darren knew in that moment was that needed to get Chris back, no matter what the cost.
